The Buhler Blogs

This is the sequel to The Kissing Hand. Let's see what Houdini and Bag Boy have been up to since we last saw them. Enjoy!

Buhler Family Blog #1
September 8th 2007


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Oops, Whoops, and Wow! by Urs



I can’t believe little Gabriel is two years old. What a houseful we had today. It’s really great having Seb and Juliana living so close and Amelie and Gabe really play well together. I hope Juliana was taking notes at our birthday party so she’ll be prepared in March when Amelie turns two.

It was kinda cute when the kids tried to feed each other cake. They seemed to enjoy it, especially the squishing between the fingers part. I can still hear them squealing in delight when Gabe discovered what happens when you clap two handfuls of cake together. Amelie is certainly a fast learner. Susanna definitely lived up to her name by insisting on washable paint when we decorated. Magical idea, as usual, Houdini.

I’ll bet Grandpa John took at least a hundred pictures and Grandmuz…well let’s just say she’s 100% washable these days. Grandmami and Grandpapi are thrilled with their new names. They probably thought they’d be called ‘Hello’ forever since Gabe would say ‘Gruezi’ every time he saw them. I’m so proud of Susanna for learning some Swiss German and practicing with Gabe when I’m not here. We feel it’s very important for our children to speak and understand both our languages and culture.

With four grandparents staying here, I’m sure Gabe will be in good hands when Susanna and I have a few days away for her birthday on the 10th. Privately, Papi, John, and I have a bet on how many times she’ll call to check on Gabe.

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Pat-a-Cake Birthday Style by Susanna

Poor Seb, the appalled look on his face when he saw his little princess Amelie! How was Gabriel supposed to know she’d turn her head just as he was sharing a handful of cake? And here I thought he was the worlds worst for getting his ears washed. He isn’t even a close second! Talk about hitting the high notes; even David would have been impressed.

Luckily I had an extra box of Oxiclean to send home with Juliana. She looked a little skeptical when I guaranteed it would get out those chocolate stains, but after all with my two boys who would know better than me? I buy a case at a time for goodness sake! Unfortunately, it took Muz two ruined outfits before she abandoned her ‘dry clean only’ wardrobe. I guess you could call her a slow learner, but I have to hand it to her. Once she ‘gets it’ she never forgets.

If Urs only knew how Gabe and I have been practicing Grandmami and Grandpapi and finally today of all days out it popped, just like he’d been calling them that all his life. The little stinker! If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was just waiting to butter them up so he could twist them even tighter around his little finger while Mommie and Papa are gone. At least Mami and Papi are only besotted, not BESOTTED like Muz and Dad. Somehow that distinction is not very comforting. I wonder how Urs would feel about going away for only one night instead of two.


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Yum! by Gabriel

Glad you got over that ear thing, Am-ee. I knew just how you felt when your Maman got that look in her eye and came toward you with that wet washy thing in her hand. Yuck! Don’t you just hate when that happens? You really sang loud for her, even louder than my Papa when he’s in that room where it rains sometimes.

Did you see how Mommie started breathing again after I called the other tall ones Grandmami and Grandpapi? Now if I can only figure out which is which? I guess I need to pick one name and just keep saying it over and over and see who comes. That’s how I trained Grandmuz and Grandpa John. Now they come almost every time I call…..unless Mommie says the bad word, “No”. I think maybe I’ll try saying that word and see how she likes it.

This was the funnest day ever wasn’t it Am-ee? A long time ago I think I had another day kinda like this. You were there too, but you were a little goo-goo baby. I remember Mommie and Papa making so many ha-ha sounds that I couldn’t even see Papa’s eyes. You’d think I was the first kid to ever have some of that yummy squishy chocolate birthday cake accidentally fall into his baby wrapper. Well that didn’t happen this time. See my fingers? I’m this many now…. And see what I’m wearing? Big boy pants they’re called and yummy squishy chocolate birthday cake never falls into them. I like my big boy pants wery much. They’re just like my Papa’s. Next time I’ll tell you how I got them.

Buhler Family Blog #2
September 24, 2007

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On the Road Again by Urs

Gott, it feels good to be back in the studio working on the new CD and to have the gift of time to produce it. All of us came back to work so totally focused and enthusiastic. With these new songs and arrangements I just know this will be our best effort to date. Fingers crossed that our fans agree.

Losing the bet to John and Papi was money well spent. Susanna totally surprised me by limiting herself to checking on Gabe only once each day, but then she still amazes me on a regular basis. Our little getaway for her birthday was incredible even though we stayed close to home. The Lygon Arms in Broadway was perfect and as for those late pregnancy hormones….let’s just say I’m taking more vitamins.

Gabriel is now officially potty trained and Susanna and I can both heave a sigh of relief, but for different reasons I suspect. With the twins due in less than four months, she’ll have only two in diapers. I’ve already started dropping the ‘P’ word, puppy, into the conversation, but evidently there’s a phase two of this potty thing: accuracy training. She’s put me in charge and says no pass/no puppy. We’ll work on that when I get back from Stockholm for Christmas. It probably won’t take more than a week or so. How hard can it be?

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Adjustments by Susanna

I can’t believe what a wimp I’m turning into….or it that blimp? My tummy is growing exponentially even as I write and I can’t believe how much I miss my Bag Boy. I know it’s just those silly hormones plus being spoiled with having him home most of the summer that’s making me seriously consider getting a puppy now. Maybe I’ll just research the most child-friendly breeds so I’ll be ready when he starts begging. The poor silly wombat has no earthly idea what accuracy training involves. Heck, neither do some grown men for that matter!

And speaking of blimps, he’s been so sweet about the handicapped bench in the shower….frustrated but sweet. He practically insists I shower sitting down now. I must admit it comes in handy so he can wash my legs and feet. Ever the optimist, I always assume they haven’t gone missing even though I can’t see them except in a mirror. I really did luck out though because the Lygon Arms had no shower bench so every time Urs took a shower I could call Muz or Mami to see how Gabe was doing. It’s a good thing we planned ahead of time so they could pretend they were talking to someone else.

The hotel really was a perfect place for a couple of relaxing and romantic days by ourselves.





Urs laughs because I call our little getaways ‘he-ing it and she-ing it’. Since we were a couple before we were a family, we realize how important it is to still take time out to celebrate ‘us’. It has made us a stronger family and the timing couldn’t have been better. With Urs getting back in mid-December and the twins due in January or earlier, I’m sure we’ll be busier than one-armed paperhangers.

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I Can Fly by Gabriel

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

I remember when Papa used to change my diaper. I really thought he could move faster than that. I think I just surprised him the first time. You should have seen his face…. and his sleeve. I don’t think he’d ever admit it but I know he was impressed. Then there was that other time…. definitely not impressed. His eyes got big and rolly … something about “Him” and “Schiesse” I think.

Papa is wery proud that I don’t leak anymore but I am even prouder. Can you imagine the indignity of having your legs hoisted into the sky while someone, other than you, wipes your bottom? Yuck! Then to add insult to injury they smear on Boudreaux’s Butt Paste. Oh the shame of it all! I’m so glad those days are ‘behind’ me. Sorry about that but I just couldn’t resist. After all I am Houdini’s son too.

I have finally figured out which one is Grandmami and which one is Grandpapi but having four minders while Mommie and Papa are away is a little overkill don’t you think? At least when Nanny T. is here she doesn’t plop me in the tub with warm water and a floating bird three times a day. Don’t they know I need to get dirty to build up my immunity? I am grateful they dry me carefully so I don’t shrink, but why they insist on sprinkling me with all that white dusty stuff I’ll never know. Do they think I’ll stick to things?

Now that I wear big boy pants, Mommie lets Papa take me to go potty in the eating out place. It’s so much fun. I laugh and laugh. We go into the room with the big potty and he closes the door. I need him to help me unbutton my cheans sometimes but I pull down my big boy pants all by myself. Then we play the Superman Game. Papa holds me like I’m Superman flying over the potty while I whiz. Then he whirls me around for a landing. After I pull up my big boy pants, Papa says I have to be careful and go slow when I zip up my cheans. “Now we wash our hands,” he says. “Yes Papa,” I say, and we do.

Buhler Family Blog #3
October 14, 2007

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Family Fun by Urs

As Houdini would say, ”Lincoln has freed the slaves!” just another little Susannese phrase. Ackshully I think it’s to get even for the times when I’ll only speak to her in Swiss German so she can practice. Anyway it’s great to finally have a long weekend to get back home.

Nanny Tibble seems to be the Mary Poppins of the Buhler family. Even though she’s only here two days a week until after the twins are born, Susanna looks more rested and Gabe has fallen in love with her. It’s “Nanny T. this….Nanny T. that….” As for me, I’m hoping she’ll share her recipe for chocolate bread pudding with Susanna. I’ve gotten addicted.

As of yesterday Gabe is no longer a baby; he had his first haircut. Susanna had been tidying up his curls, but this was the real thing…in the barber chair. I was so proud of him sitting on the little seat in the chair. As I watched his curls get trimmed it reminded me the first time I had my haircut and styled for Il Divo.

Susanna came along and asked me to wear my hair au naturel…as a model she said. I was a little embarrassed but of course how could I refuse? In the end I wound up getting a trim around the edges; Gabe insisted, “Papa you too,”.
There my Susanna was, all misty-eyed, taking pictures of us sitting there side-by-side and scooping up Gabe’s curls as they fell. I’ve never loved her more!

There is no way Susanna can deny Gabe a dog now. We took him to the petting farm Saturday after his haircut. He’s a natural Dr. Doolittle. A couple of the children weren’t too sure about getting up close but not our Gabe. If anything, the goats, sheep, chickens and especially the donkey were probably relieved by the time Gabe got done examining, petting, and hugging them. My son now has the dubious distinction of being able to say,” I’ve kissed a donkey’s ass.” Well he is a very loving child after all!

If I could, I’d put this weekend in a bottle and take with me when I have to leave again. It was cool and rainy today and in the afternoon I made a fire and Susanna and I watched our Sunday movie while Gabriel napped. Limpets...staying in the bathroom till my clothes were dry…motorcycle movies…we laughed as we relived all those special memories and made a few more as we snuggled on the couch, feeling the kicks of our two unborn children. Simply magical!


My Wild Ones by Susanna

I admit Urs’ idea of having a nanny to help with the twins was a good idea but having her start now for a few days a week to get to know Gabe and learn our routines was brilliant. It’s like having a resident expert on call. Gabe is by no means a behavior problem…at least not yet. It’s just that he takes after his father…curious and how shall I put it? rather single-minded at times. Combine this with the ‘terrible twos’ everyone is warning us about and I think Nanny Tibble will certainly earn her pay.

Gabe and Urs have really taken to her. Fortunately, only Urs has managed to wrap her around his little finger. I still can’t believe how that man went on and on about her bread pudding. Then, when the poor woman was still dazed and in a weakened state from his compliments, he turned on his killer smile and asked if she had ever heard of a chocolate bread pudding? Well no she hadn’t, but isn’t it grand that Mr. Urs loves her pudding just like her two grown sons do and she’ll see what she can do about making a chocolate one for him. I tell you the Swiss may be neutral but they don’t play fair.

It was time I know, but I really got misty-eyed seeing Gabe change before my eyes. He looks so grown up now…not my little baby anymore. Urs teased me about saving his curls so I jokingly threatened to save his and offer them for sale on the Forum. You should have seen his face! I think the word blanched would best describe it.

As he watched Gabe he couldn’t hide his wistful expression and I saw him swallow hard just before his eye-squinching grin started so I’m proud to say there’s two softies in our family. And proud…you know how straight Urs stands, well if he had stuck his chest out any more he’d have fallen over backwards. What a pair my two boys make!

I swear about as many people were watching Gabe as the animals at the petting farm. He didn’t know which one to hug first! The pictures we took were priceless. The one with him hugging the donkey and kissing his rump is Urs’ favorite, but mine is with the goats. Gabe was curious about what they were eating so he got down on the ground right in the middle of them. There was Gabe the Goat Boy checking things out while one of the goats rested his hoof on his back.
It’s a good thing we’re getting a puppy soon or I’m afraid we’d be making several trips a week out here!

I’m so excited that Urs doesn’t have to leave until Monday night. He doesn’t know it yet but I’m going to let him finally persuade me that Gabe needs a puppy. Originally I thought I’d surprise him with a fully trained puppy but then I felt a little guilty about not letting him help choose one since it was his idea in the first place. I’ve made arrangements for us to check out two breeders on Monday. I probably should have told him sooner but I love when he uses his powers of persuasion… absolutely heavenly.


Sitting in the Big Chair by Gabriel

Today Papa took me to get a haircut. Mommie always cuts my hair but today she just watched…and picked my hair up off the floor so the hair man wouldn’t have to sweep it away. I guess she didn’t feel like helping when Papa got his cut.

First the hair man, he’s called a barver, put this little chair on a big chair to make me tall. Papa didn’t need a little chair. He’s tall already. Someday I’m gonna be tall as my Papa. Next he put a wery big bib all over me and Papa had to wear a bib too. That was funny. Then Mommie and Papa said to sit wery still so I tried my best. The barver combed my hair and went snip, snip, snip. After, he brushed me all over with a furry brush that tickled and made me laugh.

Then Papa said since I had been a good boy and sat wery still for the barver we could go to see the aminals. It was so fun to pet them. They all like to be hugged but be careful of the goat because he likes to eat your clothes sometimes. I like the goats best. They are my friends. One even put his arm around me while he was eating. I gave the donkey a hug and a kiss too.

Sue I am so glad to see this here it makes me smile and laugh at Gabe and URS when reading it.
I am thinking I need to reread the Kissing Hand again.

One of my favs.


Laura

Thanks Laura. I'm enjoying rereading them as I post. I think this is my favorite story.

SQ

Buhler Family Blog #4
Nov. 1, 2007

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Papa Bear was Just Right by Urs

Yes! I knew Susanna would finally give in! The Buhler family has increased by one very hairy addition, but more on that later.

In case there are any genetics’ experts out there I’ve discovered if there is a taste bud gene it is not passed on through the male line.

After we went to look at puppies, another Susanna surprise, we stopped for a quick bite at her favorite Mexican restaurant. Evidently at least one of the twins must have Latin leanings because that’s what this particular little senorita seems to crave lately. Susanna must have pure salsa running through her veins by now, although as the twins continue to take up more space, she has downgraded her heat level and quantity from lethal to hazardous to your health.

I say senorita because we know for sure one twin is a girl. Whenever Susanna has an ultrasound there she is front and center. I’m hoping the other one is a boy and just being a gentleman so Gabe and I won’t be outnumbered.

At the restaurant, I asked for mild salsa for Gabe and I and medium hot for Susanna. I dipped and Gabe ate and we were doing fine until he took it upon himself to try some of Mommie’s salsa. All I could do was grab his glass of milk and wait for the screams to start…they didn’t. He ackshully liked it!

Now back to the puppy. We told Gabe we were going to visit the doggie farm. We wanted to see how the puppies reacted to him and vice versa since we needed one that was Gabe proof. We visited both golden Retriever and Newfoundland breeders. You should have seen Gabe when he saw the retrievers. As Susanna put it, “He has the same look you do in a guitar shop or a Harley showroom.” But when we saw the Newfies, Gabe and this little female fell in love at first sight or should I say lick. We had him ‘meet’ all of them but he always kept coming back to this same one and so did she. So that’s how Schatzi Buhler officially joined the family a week ago.

Although I really miss Susanna and Gabe, this Halloween I feel thankful I’m out of the country. I definitely dodged the bullet. Since Gabe was a little young to go trick or treating last year we had a few friends over for a costume party. Three guesses what we dressed up as… milk and cookies. Never again! My only excuse is she must have put a magic spell on me.

This year my magical wife organized a few of our neighbors with children to go trick or treating. Juliana and Princess Amelie, came along too as well as Schatzi, dressed as a cowboy dog with a red bandana around her neck.


Back to School by Susanna

Yes, I know I am in need of a rubber room, getting a puppy with twins due in a little over two months, but Schatzi is just so adorable and exceptionally smart too. Actually I have to confess. Our wonderful breeder offers a special program called Easy Pup, which took all the ‘hard stuff’ out of the puppy experience. So by the time Schatzi joined our family at 13 weeks, she was housebroken, sleeping comfortably in her crate at night, and had basic puppy manners like sit, no jumping, come when called, and no biting.

When we brought her home I had a long heart to heart talk with her about remembering the potty training thing. She knows we’re working under pressure here and has promised to try her best. I think she’s doing great because she can usually go about four hours between potty times. Gabe is thrilled to death to be the ‘trained’ expert and loves to follow her around the yard saying, “Go potty,”.

With the yard fenced now, both our ‘children’ can run and play safely to their hearts content. We’re working on our feeding, playing, napping routine and I think we’ll all benefit from it. Gabe and Schatzi seem to wear each other out equally and frequently. So while they nap, I can put my feet up and rest too, something I seem to need more and more of these days. I’m beginning to think Schatzi has just a titch of Swiss blood in her veins because Nanny Tibble has fallen under her spell and seems to be doing more fetching than the dog.

Guess what I’ll be doing for the next 7 Saturdays at 11:30 am? Schatzi and I will be at puppy kindergarten. I am praying she’ll be a gifted puppy and not a slow leaner. The focus is puppy socialization and basic obedience. We’ll be finished just before Urs gets back from Venezuela. Then he’ll be off until at least the end of January. My due date is January 15th but the doctor said twins often come early so we’re hoping.

I see Bag Boy had a little bout of amnesia about our visit to the Mexican restaurant. Well here’s the whole enchilada. AFTER Gabe was happily munching on Mommie’s chips and salsa, AFTER Urs was left holding the unnecessary glass of milk, Gabe offered a chip and salsa to Urs. “Papa eat some,” he requested, followed by a miniature version of Urs’ killer smile. What could Papa do? Papa ate. It was a good thing Papa still had the glass of milk in his hand…downed in one long gulp. I’d say Gabe is evenly matched….Bag Boy’s smile and Houdini’s stomach lining.

Amelie and Gabe had a ball trick or treating at the neighbors and Schatzi thought it was the most fun walk she’d ever had. She probably thought she’d died and gone to petting heaven. It’s a wonder she had any fur left on her, but she really lapped it up. (oops, sorry about that)

I am really disappointed Urs couldn’t be here for this once in a lifetime Halloween. It would have been perfect! Next year we’ll be too many. I had it all planned….Mommie Bear, Papa Bear, and Baby Bear. Funny, when I mentioned it he didn’t sound as disappointed as I thought he would.


Trick and Treat by Gabriel

We have our wery own aminal! She is black and furry and she is a Newfie dog.

Her name is Schatzi Booler and she is my friend. We play run and tickle and fall down all over the back garden. She gives wet kisses and sometimes she drools; Mommie calls it slobber. She has to go potty outside in the grass. I say, “Go potty,” and she does. A few times she didn’t get to the grass in time. I think she is getting new teeth cuz Mommie said I drooled when I got mine. She’s still a baby puppy so she takes naps like I used to. Well, once in awhile I still take a nap too cuz having your wery own aminal can make you tired.

I really like this Halloween. Am-ee and I went for a walk with our Mommies and a lot of other Mommies and kids and guess what? It was dark out.

Mommie said I had to wear a costume. Sometimes I don’t like to wear what she wants and I say, “No, no, no!” but then I have to go to ‘stralia and sit in a chair called time out.

This time I didn’t say no. She said I was going to be a cowboy and I could wear my boots and cheans like Papa. Then she tied a red thing around my neck. I started to say no but she made Schatzi wear one too so I kept mine on. I didn’t want Schatzi to feel bad. But the hat was the worst. It had a string under my neck. She said that’s what cowboys wear but Schatzi didn’t have one. I kept pulling it off and she finally got tired of putting it on again. Then she said something about being just like my Papa.

Am-ee looked all pink and fluffy cuz she was a princess. She wore a pointy little hat but hers didn’t have a string under her chin. At least I could wear my chean jacket and not a furry coat like she did. We got to push the doorbell, if we could reach. Then we said trick and treat when the people came and they put stuff in our pail. Mostly Am-ee and I remembered to say thank-you.

When we got back to my house, Am-ee and I ate dirt and worms while our Mommies looked in our pails. Am-ee said “Ewwww!” cause she didn’t know it was chocolate pudding and mashed cookies and mungie gummie worms. I showed her it tasted good and she liked it then.

After…Auntie Juli told us, “Only one thing from your pail,”. I picked something green but it was yucky. I made a bad face and spit it out. Schatzi liked it.

Loved reading the Blogs the first time round.... Just as much fun this time round.

Rosemary

Me too, Thelma.

SQ

Buhler Family Blog #5
Nov. 20, 2007

Perfectly Done by Urs

That’s exactly what I wanted for Susanna’s Thanksgiving this year and I did it! Just call me the Swiss Sneak. Susanna was really looking forward to having her parents here. They’ll be coming the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and staying for 10 days. Since there is a chance I’ll be stuck here Thursday and Friday I decided to soften the blow with some surprise guests just in case. Auntie Alta and Uncle Edmund will be coming with Muz and John. I’m so glad they’ll be here since my first Thanksgiving with Susanna was at their home. Of course Father Mike will be here as usual. Gabe has really taken to him and Schatzi too from what Susanna tells me.

Susanna has been telling me how Gabriel has been visiting Australia more often. He even has been saying, “No!’ and she has had to spank him, very gently she assures me, once or twice. I could pretend I am wery surprised but then I do remember being spanked by Mami a few times myself. When I told her all she did was laugh and say with me it was more than a few times. Too bad Australia hadn’t been invented back then.

Susanna has also warned me that sometimes when she sends Gabe to Australia he has started name-calling. She says I need to ignore it and stay calm. I can’t imagine what names he is calling because both of us are wery careful to watch what we say around him. I hope Houdini will have everything sorted out by the time I get home or at least teach me some of her magic tricks.

Schatzi is near the top of her class in Puppy Kindergarten… whatever that means. I’d never heard of such a thing but Houdini says that it’s good. I just hope she’ll be a quick learner when comes to accepting me because it will be my turn to take her to Family Dog classes after she ‘graduates’. What can I say? It must have been another magic spell.

I was just telling Mami and Papi the other night how well Gabe’s Swiss German is coming along. From the start we decided I’d speak to him in Swiss German and Susanna would speak to him in English. I think it’s even helping Susanna when she hears me teaching Gabe. Whenever I call and his little boy voice comes on the phone my heart just melts. I am so proud of him.


Fireworks by Susanna

I am so excited! This most magical season of all has literally begun with a bang. November 5th was Guy Fawkes Night, celebrated to commemorate the foiling of the Gunpowder Plot to blow up the Houses of Parliament. And what happens on Guy Fawkes Night? Fireworks!! It’s the only holiday other than New Year’s with fireworks. No Fourth of July here!

There are fireworks displays all over London so Gabe and I bundled up and off we went to Bishops Park to watch from the Putney side of the river. Thank goodness I found that great plaid wool blanket in the market to make a poncho to use for a winter coat. Otherwise I’m afraid the twins would be suffering from frostbite.

Gabe had a nice long nap so even though it started at 7:15 we were almost home before he started to fade. He absolutely loved it! He kept clapping and squealing, “More, more!”.



I got one of the teenage girls down the road to puppy sit Schatzi just in case she heard some unfamiliar noises. That little furry teddy bear has climbed right into my heart. It was almost as bad as the first time we left Gabriel. I can’t believe I actually called home to see how she was doing. Of course she was fine!

Then last week I took Gabe to see the Christmas lights on Oxford Street. This year they are being sponsored and themed around the Walt Disney film “Enchanted.” We ‘ohhhhed’ and ‘ahhhed’ our way for a few blocks and then visited the Disney store where Gabe found some things to put on his list for Santa or Father Christmas or whatever he’s called in Swiss German. I must remember to ask Urs. Last year Gabriel was still too young to understand what was going on but this year Urs and I are beginning to teach him our religious and cultural traditions of the season.




I know I sound like a silly-nosed wombat but just holding tight to Gabe’s little hand made me feel closer to Urs. It brought back all of those special memories of us shopping together for Christmas presents for our families’. Has it already been three Christmases ago? Now this year they’ll be four stockings hung on the Buhler mantel and next year…six. How our lives have changed!

I can’t wait till Muz and Daddy get here. Will they ever be surprised to see how much Gabe has grown….along with his mother! I can’t believe I’ve gained almost 30 pounds already. The doctor seems to think that’s fine but I still have almost two months left and something tells me each twin will not weigh 15 pounds. On second thought that wouldn’t be a good thing.

Maybe that’s one of the reasons why I love Schatzi so much. Only she gains more weight per month than I do….so far she’s gained 10 pounds. The vet says she’ll keep growing at that rate for her first year. She’s just about finished with her heavy fall shedding, thank God, because I was seriously considering vacuuming her just before Muz arrives. At least she’s already used to the drool with Gabe so I’m sure she’ll be fine. I’ll just give her a lint remover and stock up on tape refills. Well we knew when we got her that Newfie’s are not for the house-proud. Neither is an active two year old and infant twins for that matter. I have a feeling Urs’ neatness standards may be in for a reality check.



At this point in my pregnancy there’s not too many body parts I’m still capable of crossing but I’m doing my best in hopes Urs can make it home for Thanksgiving. I’m trying to be upbeat so he doesn’t guilty but it really would mean a lot to me. I haven’t said anything to Gabe about seeing Papa until I know for sure but he does know Father Mike is coming.

They have become best buddies. Secretly I think Father Mike is giving him charm lessons. It’s always after he visits us that when Gabe misbehaves out comes some cute little comment or expression as he heads for Australia. Most of the time I’m trying so hard to keep from laughing that all I can do is bite my lip and point to the time out chair. By the way I’ve discovered how to cope with Gabe’s infrequent but loud temper tizzies in public. It only took him three wrong choices on the “Behave or Go Home Show” to become a winning contestant. I’m keeping my camera handy to record Urs’ expression the first time he witnesses one.


Not Again by Gabriel

Every day and every day Mommie sends me to ‘stralia’….well not EVERY day. I do not like sitting in the red chair. Sometimes I say I do not want to go and other things but she just keeps pointing and I have to sit there till I am done. Sometimes she tells me when I am done and sometimes I tell her I am ready to be done sitting. She says, “not yet” or “yes’ and we talk about why I had to be there.

Once in a while when Mommie isn’t looking, I tell myself I am done and I go play. When Mommie finds me she spanks my hunkus and we go back to ‘stralia again but longer. Poor Schatzi! If she tries to visit me Mommie puts her in doggie ‘stralia in the back garden. When I am done Mommie says I can go get her. She is so happy to be out of ‘stralia she gives me kisses. I try to be good but sometimes I want to be the boss of me. I hope Papa doesn’t know about ‘stralia.

Let me tell you about having a tizzy around my Mommie….don’t. One day at McDonald’s I got to have a Happy Meal. I was happy. Mommie let me put catsup on my French fries. I like catsup. I was wery happy. I wanted more catsup. Mommie said, “No, you have enough.” I was not wery happy then so I did a loud tizzy. Mommie said I could behave or we would go home but I was too busy tizzying to hear her. The next thing I knew she scooped me out of the chair and we went home WITHOUT my Happy Meal. I was wery not happy.

Grandmuz and Grandpa John are coming to our house in three more days. Mommie says every morning when I get up I can draw an X on my chalkboard in the kitchen. We will count them 1, 2, 3 and then they will be here.

Grandpa John is fun. He picks me up high in the air and I sit on his shoulders. We walk around the house and he lets me try to touch the sky. Grandmuz and I like to read aminal books. I don’t think she knows her aminals very well because she’s always pointing and asking me their names. It’s a good thing I know what they are.

Tonight Papa called. First he talked to Mommie in her talk and then it was my turn. Papa and I have a special way of talking, just like Grandmami and Grandpapi. We help Mommie cuz she’s not so good at it as me. Am-ee has two ways to talk just like me but I only know one of them.

Papa said Faver Mike is coming to our house to eat. I think he said it was to thank the turkey or something like that. Papa talks wery fast sometimes. I love when Faver Mike comes to our house. Schatzi loves it too. We play chase the ball and chase Schatzi and chase everybody. Then we all fall down and rest. He brings us presents too. Last time he brought me a color book and Schatzi got a toy that squeaked. Guess what? Schatzi squeaked it to death. Mommie said it was a good thing she found the squeaker before Schatzi ate it. No more squeakers for Schatzi.




Buhler Family Blog #6
Nov. 30, 2007

Family Life by Urs

It was touch and go there for awhile but in the end I made it home for Susanna’s Thanksgiving. The guys were really great about letting me do my parts at the beginning of the week so I could get away.

As I walked up the steps to the house I was filled with such an overwhelming sense of home…so familiar, comforting, and peaceful. Well not THAT peaceful, considering we had four hugging, kissing, storytelling relatives, one charming priest, one tizzying two year old, one barking, licking dog and a very pregnant wife, (both growing bigger by the hour), and me.

When Gabe first saw me he wasn’t too sure about my beard. “Papa you’re fuzzy.” But now when I use it to tickle his cute little tummy he squeals with laughter. Houdini doesn’t seem to like that as much…at least most of the time. Well how was I to know the twins were sleeping? Still she made me promise not to shave it till after I come home for Christmas. I’ll bet you anything Gabe will know all the verses to ‘Fuzzy Wuzzy’ before I’m back in Stockholm. Just as long as he thinks it’s a song about a bear.

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Yes, I am ready to admit I have experienced my first tizzy and lived to tell the tale. Ackshully, I feel I handled it quite successfully…after the initial shock of course. I don’t believe I’ve ever seen quite that shade of red on a human being before. On the other hand, he does take after his papa. I can say without a doubt Gabe’s voice is definitely in the tenor range. Susanna was right about one thing. That Australia is a wonderful place!

She says Gabe has had several of these tizzies. I’m sure she was exaggerating; after all he is such a well-mannered and loving child. I do have a new admiration and respect for her though. She told me staying calm was the hardest part of discipline and she was so right. I can’t say which was more difficult: staying calm when that crazy woman ran up and kissed me at the Mexico concert or tonight when I put Gabe in Australia and he called me a….a name and in front of Father Mike!

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It was so great seeing Aunt Alta and Uncle Edmund. It’s been over a year since they came to visit. It was just after Andrew and Isabel’s daughter Kristina was born. They were going to leave Sunday and visit them in Paris for a week or two but Andrew has convinced them to stay for Christmas and they are so excited! It’s babies, babies, babies, that’s all those women talk about.

I am really glad Muz and Aunt Alta are here to help Susanna. She always wants to do everything herself and take care of everyone else. Finally between Muz and Aunt Alta they ganged up on her and insisted she put her feet up and rest.

She doesn’t know it yet but I’ve asked Muz and John to stay here with her and Gabe until I come home for Christmas break on the 15th. I won’t worry as much if I know they’re here with her. Muz was thrilled that I asked them and Susanna said ever since Grandpa John and Uncle Edmund got here Gabe’s been following them around like they were the Pied Pipers. I know he misses me and sometimes it’s so hard to be away from my family but that’s the nature of our life right now. At least we’re lucky there’s no long tours planned this year.

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Yesterday as Father Mike said the blessing I looked around our Thanksgiving table and thought of the great gift of family life. Here are people I know and love that I might never even have introduced myself to if life hadn’t done it for me. That is the true blessing.


Urs Does Australia by Susanna

Yes! There is a God! Urs has come face to face with his son’s first tizzy. I know this sounds a tiny bit evil but I was really hoping for one and the little toot didn’t disappoint. In the back of my brain I was thinking: what if Gabe behaves perfectly all the time Urs is here, rather like when your child is sick, you make a frantic appointment with the doctor and somewhere between home and the doctor’s office he is miraculously healed…the only symptom left for the doctor to diagnose is a paranoid mother.

Gabe was up early as usual. Not a trait passed down from me I’m sad to say. We decided to call Mami and Papi about 1:00. That way hopefully Gabe would take a little nap before we ate about 3:30.

So while Muz and Aunt Alta did their thing in the kitchen and Daddy and Uncle Edmund went out for a walk, Urs called. We put Gabe on first to say hello. They always get so tickled to hear him. Then Urs got on. Well it didn’t take very long before Gabriel thought Papa had talked long enough and it was time to get back to playing horsy. So did Schatzi for that matter.

First it was just pulling Papa’s hand and a little whining. Urs began with just a headshake “no”, then the “shhhh”, then hand over the receiver, “No, Gabriel, Papa is on the phone”.
As Gabe’s volume increased so did the tears, finally ending in a full-fledged tizzy complete with jumping up and down. At this point Urs’ expression was rather quizzical as if questioning who had kidnapped Gabe and placed this possessed child in his place.

Urs’ time had come. I gently took the phone from his hand, armed him with my two whispered magic words, “Australia, calm,” and sent Papa into battle as Father Mike looked on.

In the meantime I set the scene for Mami and Papi and gave them a running commentary.

Taking a calming breath, he squared his shoulders and firmly but gently grasped Gabriel’s hand and led him screaming, crying, and tizzying to Australia.

Having deposited his errant son in time out, and calmly telling him he’d let him know when he could come back from Australia, he gracefully turned and began walking back to finish his phone conversation. From his elegant prowl and the triumphant look in his eye I could almost read his thoughts. That wasn’t so bad. This tizzying stuff is no big deal. Suddenly his legs halted in mid-prowl.

“Papa, you’re a fairy-nosed wombat!” Gabriel commented from Australia.

Papa’s head began to turn. His lips compressed in a tight, straight line as dark color crept up his neck to his face.

From around the corner out of Gabe’s line of sight, I frantically shook my head and mouthed, “No!” as I motioned with my hand for him to stay calm and keep walking. With a mighty force of will, Papa slowly unclenched his fists and resumed his prowl albeit without a trace of smugness.

As Urs finished talking to Mami and Papi, I could hear snatches of his conversation as I checked on Gabriel, now tizzied out and waiting rather unhappily for Papa to recall him from ‘stralia.

“Mami do you know what…”
“Then he called…”
“What?”
“When?”
“How old was I?”
“Really?”
Then Urs unmistakable laugh.

Back in the hall, Urs stood grinning, still holding the phone.
“Guess what, Susanna? Mami said I used to call her names too!”

“You? Why I can’t believe it! Not you Urs!” I gave an Academy Award winning performance as I bit the inside of my mouth to keep from laughing.

“She says I called her Sprout Face. I was tizzying about not eating my Brussels sprouts.” Urs’ look was a cross between amazement and pride.

“Well, then there’s hope for Gabriel yet. You turned out pretty good there, Bag Boy, if I do say so myself.” I gave him my best toe-curling kiss, well as least my toes FELT curled, at this stage I’m not too sure what’s under my belly.

“It was kinda funny….fairy-nosed wombat but we need to be sure he understands it’s HAIRY-nosed. I think he’s about done in Australia, don’t you?” Urs asked seriously.

“Whatever you think, Urs. He is your son.”

So Urs returned and welcomed Gabe home from ‘stralia.

“Urs, if God had trouble raising His children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?” Father Mike twinkled, trying to keep a straight face.

After a very brief father-son conversation about his recent visit and a clarification about hairy not fairy, the horsy and his rider galloped upstairs for a story and a nap.

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I forgot to tell you about Urs surprising me. First of all there was Aunt Alta and Uncle Edmund. I’ll never think of Thanksgiving without giving a special thanks for their kindness to Urs. They really welcomed him from the very first. Of course he’s still ‘son’ to Uncle Edmund and Auntie Alta is only my giddy Auntie if Urs is in concert mode.

We came back from church on Thanksgiving morning, but instead of seeing Marcy, the teenager next door who baby-sits for Gabe, there he was. Seeing Urs standing in the doorway holding Gabe, both of them wearing smiles a mile wide as if to say, “Welcome to my world,” all I could say was, “You are my world,”.

Papa Knows by Gabriel

I don’t know when she did it but she told him. Papa knows about ‘stralia. Papa and I were playing horsy. He’s the bestest horse. He goes fast. Sometimes he stands on his back legs and I fall off less I hold onto his neck. Mommie can’t play horsy cuz her tummy is too full of babies. One is a girl sister and the other is something but we don’t know what yet. I hope it’s a boy bruver but Papa says whatever it is we can’t take it back. Schatzi doesn’t care.

Then Papa called Grandmami and Grandpapi and I got to talk to them on the phone. I like to talk to them but then I wanted to play horsy more and Papa wanted to talk, talk, talk. I said to myself, ‘No, no, no,’. Then I said it loud, wery loud but Papa said, “Shhhhh.” I didn’t want to “Shhhhhh.” I just wanted to play with Papa. I want to play with him every day and every day but sometimes he has to go far away to work and I miss him.

I said to myself, ‘Gabe, maybe Papa will stop his talk, talk, talk and play if you tizzy…just a little’. So I did, but he didn’t. Then I tizzied bigger and bigger and pretty soon Papa stopped his talk, talk, talk but he didn’t play. He took me right to ‘stralia just like Mommie does. So then I tried the name call, just like I did to Mommie. I know he heard me cuz he stopped but then he just kinda did a big breathe and started walking again. Then I heard him talking to Grandmami and Grandpapi. He went, “Ha, ha, ha,”. I think Grandmami told him to let me be done in ‘stralia cuz pretty soon he came back and I was done. Then we played horsy up the stairs and we read a story and we got snuggly and Papa sang and that’s all I remember.

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When I woke up it was time to eat Thanksgiving. We sat at the big, big table, not in the kitchen. Faver Mike thanked the turkey and I helped. He told me to say, “and bless the cook,” after his turn. I did and everybody liked it.

Then Mommie put food on my plate. When she tried to cut it I said, “No, I want Papa to cut it,” but not in my loud tizzy voice cuz I remembered what happened to my Happy Meal.

Guess what? We had ice cream right away. It was red and like an ice lolly. I made a face cuz it needed more sweet on it. Daddy helped me put it on my spoon. He said it was cramberry surebut. I ate some cuz the rule is you have to try a spoon of everything. I wonder if Papa knows that rule. Probably, cuz all he and Mommie like to do is talk, talk, talk every day and every day….and kiss sometimes when Papa comes and goes.

Papa said even Schatzi had Thanksgiving cuz she sits under my chair and hopes I’ll drop some food….and I always do, specially if no one is looking. Thank you turkey for the bestest Thanksgiving….’cept the ‘stralia part.

Buhler Family Blog #7
Dec. 18, 2007

Dinner for Two or More by Urs

On Monday night, the two of us attended a local area Parents of Multiples Night Out Dinner. Susanna has been getting together with several of the moms to get some real life advice, but this is the first time I’ve been home to meet them. I was so proud of her because most of the moms of twins we spoke to were amazed to see how well Susanna is doing at this stage of her pregnancy. Some told us how they had already delivered at this point (we begin week 35 Wednesday) and most were astounded to hear that she hasn't been forced to have any bed rest as we enter the last few weeks of her pregnancy.

I really enjoyed meeting them, especially getting to talk to the dads and get some advice from their perspective. I did try to stay pretty close to Susanna though. She was the most pregnant one there and I just want to be near her. I look at her carrying our babies and I feel this overwhelming love and need to protect her.

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I have the hospital programmed into the GPS and our hospital bag is packed in preparation for the big trip. I have learned my lesson. This time I am not packing a book to read to her. I still remember Houdini informing me what I could do with my less than sensitive book choice when she was in labor with Gabe. I guess I should count myself lucky she didn’t put a magic spell on me and turn me into a frog…or worse.

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At our OB-GYN visit, Dr. Ziegler told us that she needs to start resting more for our twins delivery--when that will happen is still anybody's guess. Nanny Tibble and I have joined forces to keep her off her feet as much as we can. Nanny always leaves us supper when she’s here but that’s only twice a week.

Susanna does have a few casseroles and soups left in the freezer but I’m trying to save them for real emergencies so Gabe and I are doing some of the cooking. Speaking of real emergencies, it’s a good thing Mami will be here on the 21st for Christmas. Her two boys are down to their last container of cookies. Sorry Papi, we’ll be glad to see you too of course.

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Schatzi has graduated from Puppy Kindergarten with full honors. Since Family Dog classes don’t start until after the first of the year I thought this would be a good time to start ‘bonding’ with her now by taking her for walks especially since she and her puppy energy have been growing about as fast as the twins.

At first I would push Gabe in his jogging stroller and Schatzi and I would jog along behind but I would either have to slow down my pace or walk when Schatzi got tired. You wouldn’t believe how heavy she is to carry! I tried putting her in with Gabe but both of them were kinda squished and Houdini didn’t think my other solution was very magical. Now I walk her first and then later I take Gabe for a jog in his stroller.

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Just as I predicted, my son is a quick learner. This accuracy training is a breeze. All it takes is a little patience and a good role model. I’ll bet by the time Mami and Papi get here he’ll be making a bull’s eye almost every time. I’ll have to ask Susanna what else she wants me to teach him.

The Home Stretch by Susanna

Urs finally got to meet the moms and dads in the twins group. I’d already given the girls a thud warning …well not really but you know what I mean. I’d showed them some pics. Of course I made sure Gabe and I were in all of them. Not that I was really worried, in fact if truth be told I was more than a little pumped by a few of the thumbs up they gave me when Urs wasn’t looking.

It’s just that here he prowls in looking so devestatingly handsome escorting Jemima Puddleduck waddling along beside him, so not sexy, at least that’s how I feel. I’m not sure if his eye operation is beginning to reverse itself or what but then that dear sweet wombat gives me his Swiss Lover Look and suddenly I forget I’m approaching the size of a beached whale. How I love that man!

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Practically the minute Urs walked in the door for Christmas break his Swiss efficiency kicked in and he was on about packing my bag for the hospital. It was, ‘Here I am. Let the show begin,’ …as if. I humored him as we checked off the items on the list and noticed that ‘book’ was conspicuously absent this time. I guess I put the fear of God into him when Gabriel was born… but I checked later just to be sure. You should have heard the girls howl when I told them about Urs trying to sing-song his way through Having a Baby Can Be Fun just as I was getting ready to deliver.

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On Tuesday, we went to the doctor's for our weekly visit. The ultrasound showed both babies are just over 6 pounds now and still head-down. All along, our goal was to get to 36 weeks and to have six-pound twins so we're just about there! We are ready!

Urs and Nanny Tibble have been waiting on me hand and foot. It’s nice to be the queen. Here I sit most of the day with my feet up reading anything about twins. What a difference it makes! It’s so nice to be able to actually get into shoes comfortably. I was beginning to visual myself in bedroom slippers at midnight Mass. I kept teasing Urs that I’d found the perfect solution to swollen feet…fat ankles. BTW Bag Boy if you’re reading this, your foot and leg massages are to die for.

I’m not exactly sure what’s going on in my kitchen but I know the freezer was full of pre-made dinners when Muz and Daddy left last week. Muz and I worked for several days cooking, well she made me mostly sit while she did the leg work.

Now all of a sudden Urs has become Mr. Julia Child and if he serves his son rosti one more time I swear Gabe will be needing the 12 Step Program for his addiction. Then there’s cheese, let’s talk about cheese as in Fettucine Alfredo and cheese fondue. Both delicious, cooked to perfection, but every other night? There’s only so much prune juice a pregnant woman can drink!

I guess I shouldn’t complain, Gabe certainly isn’t and so far the only casualties are a few dented pans. I do concede that the fact that my stomach is now residing in the vicinity of my armpits and I can only eat about three spoonfuls of food at a time may be making me a bit testy. But a grown man calling his Mami about a cookie emergency is rather pathetic. And trying to disguise his pleading by using Swiss German? Doesn’t he know cookie was one of the first Swiss German words Mami taught me?

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Schatzi is in love. She and Urs have become best buddies, which will be great for her next level of training. They have a little routine after breakfast. Actually I don’t know who has trained whom.

Urs is also teaching Gabe to be responsible for taking care of ‘his’ puppy. He patiently lets Gabe scoop out the dog food into her bowl and I know she has the freshest water of any dog in the neighborhood because we get reminded, ‘Schatzi needs a new drink,’ several times a day. We’ve been talking about helping Gabe adjust to the new babies and by giving him responsibilities we hope it will let him feel important and grownup.

And just to set the record straight, no I did not approve of Urs’ solution for what to do when Schatzi gets tired on their walks. He knew right away he was in hot water when he came jogging back in the rain with a slightly soggy and muddy Gabriel in one seat and a very soggy and very muddy Schatzi in the other. Even his killer smile didn’t save him that time.

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Last night Urs, bless his heart, had taken Gabe upstairs to give him a bath. Lately I have to pull up a stool and sit by the tub. It was either that or get two foot arm extensions. Anyway, as I came up and passed by the bathroom I could hear Urs singing. As I stopped to listen, I just about cracked up. Oh to be a fly on the wall. You can imagine how his Il Divo voice sounded as he softly sang:

Tinkle, tinkle Gabe’s a star.
You're a big boy; yes, you are.
No more misses. No more mess.
Hit the target. Yea! Success!
Tinkle, tinkle Gabe’s a star.
You're a big boy; yes, you are.
Just like Papa here we stand
Then you know to wash your hands.
Tinkle, tinkle Gabe’s a star.
You’re a big boy; yes, you are.

The sound of the toilet flushing and water running in the sink muffled my giggles as I went into the den to check my email.

About a half hour later I could hear Urs reading Gabe some nursery rhymes in lilting German as I stopped in the bathroom for one of my frequent potty visits. I finished and was just about to flush when I saw it.

“Gabriel Christian, have you been putting Cheerios in the toilet?”

“No, mommie. Papa did. We were playing ‘Pee on the Cheerios’ and I won!”
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The Swiss may be neutral but they most certainly don’t play fair.

Two Names by Gabriel

I have some new friends. Am-ee is still my bestest friend but she flew away to see her grand-mère for Christmas. Mommie and me sometimes go to play days with other mommies and kids. Well ackshully I don’t sometimes play WITH them just next to them. I like to have them around mostly.

But sometimes there’s kids that mix me up. You won’t believe it but there are two of some of the kids. Ja, that’s right, ‘zactly two of them. And know what else? There’s some kids who don’t mix me up ‘cept if I look at their heads. Mommie says maybe our babies will be that kind but I’m such a smart boy they won’t mix ME up. I hope Papa and Schatzi are smart like me else I’ll have to teach them.

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Mommie has her baby suitcase by the door. Papa says it’s for when she goes to the hospital and comes back with the two babies that are in her tummy. I think she’ll carry them home in the suitcase. I asked Mommie how the two babies will get out and she ‘splained to me. I think I’ll ask Papa sometime and see if he knows.

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Papa and I are cookie monsters. That’s what Mommie calls us when she catches us eating her cookies. Sometimes we can’t wait and Papa gives me wery cold cookies. My teeth go bite, bite, bite wery hard. Papa says if Grandmami doesn’t come soon there will be no more cookies for the monsters.

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I am so happy to have my Papa back. Schatzi is happy too. Papa jogs me for a ride. We go fast. Schatzi used to jog with Papa but she is still a baby puppy. She gets tired so Papa let her ride on top of me but she went wiggle, wiggle, wiggle and lick, lick, lick. Papa said to hold her tight but she just popped out and ran, ran, ran. Papa had to jog fast to catch her. When he catched her he said, “Schatzi Isolde, you are a bad girl,” and she was in trouble. Then Papa had to carry Schatzi ALL the way home. When we got home he told Mommie, “She weighs a ton”. Then she went to doggie timeout cuz that’s where you go if they use your two names.

Next time Papa took me in the rider for the two babies in Mommie’s tummy. This time when Schatzi got tired she could sit in the one more seat by me ‘cept it had been raining and Schatzi likes puddles. When Mommie saw puddly Schatzi she said, “Urs Toni,” to Papa and did the bat wings with her arms. I don’t know where Papa went for his timeout.

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Papa and I have a new game called “Pee on the Cheerios.” He says he’s training me. I say it’s fun training. First I count out five Cheerios into his hand. We have to count them his way and Mommie’s way cuz that’s the rule, ‘cept sometimes when I can’t wait. Then he throws them in the big boy potty. First it is Papa’s turn. He says you have to aim wery careful and watch what you’re doing so you can hit the Cheerio and win. Then it is my turn. Papa sings the Tinkle, Tinkle Gabe’s a Star song when I hit the Cheerio.

One time a silly Cheerio didn’t go down and Mommie saw it. She said, “Gabriel Christian did you…” but I didn’t, Papa did. So that was one time she used my two names and I didn’t have to go to ‘stralia. I was wery happy.


An Error in Judgement by Schatzi
How was I supposed to know? First my Man took me running with him. I couldn’t help it if I got tired. I am still only a puppy. So He let me rest with my Boy. Then when I got rested I jumped out and started running again but now He doesn’t want me to run. He ran and picked me up and I wasn’t even tired yet! That’s when I found out—I have TWO names. This is not a good thing. When you have two names you have to go to doggie ‘stralia.

Then we went running again. I got tired and He put me next to my Boy. I remembered ‘bout the two names so I didn’t jump out and run, even when I was rested. I was a good girl…till I got home.

How was I supposed to know I must not shake the water out of my fur before going in the house? After all I didn’t open the door and let me in. My Man did. Don’t they know I love to splash in mud puddles? What do they think these webbed feet are for…waving?

This time it was two names from my Woman and doggie ‘stralia for Schatzi Isolde. Ackshully it wasn’t so bad. It was the indoor ‘stralia called the mudroom and I could come home after my Man got me clean and dry. Next time I think I’ll go straight to indoor ‘stralia just in case.



Buhler Family Blog #8
Dec. 21, 2007


Busy as Elves by Urs


I don’t think Santa’s workshop could be any busier than our house since Mami and Papi arrived. Well ackshully even before that because Susanna had me putting the finishing touch to the twins’ nursery or at least the girl’s half, pink of course. We’ve papered that half and she has more ‘girl’ and ‘boy’ paper, blankets, linens, and even a slipcover for the chair on hold.

I tried to explain to her logically that there’s no real rush since the twins will be sleeping in our room at first. Besides they won’t even know what color their room is, at least until they learn their colors, so I’m certain there will be no permanent damage done to their little psyches in the meantime. Then suddenly out came the bat wings and she changed into a little general. By the time our ‘discussion’ ended I felt kinda like one of Napoleon’s soldiers who failed inspection. I think the double hormones or something have taken over. Thank Gott Mami arrived with cookies.

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The other cradle arrived at the Kane’s, our next door neighbors, safe and sound yesterday. Frank called me on my cell so Susanna wouldn’t hear. She’d been going on and on about not being able to find a cradle that looked like the one Papi and I made for Gabriel. The minute Mami and Papi heard it was twins, he began picking out the wood for the matching one.



Then today Mami took Susanna out for some last minute shopping so we could set it up and surprise her. I was a little worried when she waddled in and saw it. She got that same look like just before she does that flying hug thing and I thought, Please Gott no! We’ll both wind up in the hospital! Then the tears and puppy kisses started. I was wery relieved and happy for all our sakes.

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I have managed to sneak off this morning and do my Christmas shopping, well part of it anyway. The rest will have to wait until after the twins come. Gabe caught me at the door and I could see him winding up for a tizzy. I remembered to stay calm though and told him rather forcefully that Papa needed to go by himself this time but after his nap I would take him shopping. It worked like a charm.

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You should have seen Gabe. I was so proud of the little tyke. He may act like a devil sometimes but underneath he’s a sweet soul and has a kind heart. I told him that when we buy presents for people we should buy them something nice enough that we’d like it ourselves. Unfortunately in Susanna’s case he really took that to heart. He picked out a tiny toy motorcycle for her and would not be budged. I remembered what Susanna said about picking you battles so I let him win that one, but with the twins I added another requirement. It needs to be soft.

So we’re on our way to the Build a Bear store when my cell rings. It’s Carlos. He and Gavina are still in town for some shows and shopping before heading to Madrid. Seems Gavina had just talked to Susanna and thought she could do with a surprise visit. She’d talked to Mami afterward and told her they’d meet us and bring dinner home. Gabe of course had to talk to Auntie Gavina and Unca Carlos, especially Unca Carlos!

We had just finished dressing the baby girl curly teddy



and were starting on the more generic looking baby velvet teddy



when they arrived. “Unca Carlos! Unca Carlos!” Gabe went running to give him a flying hug, learned from Susanna no doubt. “I give you besos,” Gabe announced as he pulled on Unca Carlos’ ‘hair string’ and bestowed rather juicy besos I’m afraid on both Auntie and Unca who didn’t seem to mind a bit.

“So mi pequeño hombre, how was the shopping?” asked Unca Carlos. Gabe’s words came tumbling out as fast as they could in a mixture Susanna and I have dubbed Swgengabe. Part me, part Susanna, and totally Gabriel. I think Gavina had some trouble understanding him, but Carlos had no problem at all. Strange!

Well when Unca Carlos found out how well-behaved Gabe had been on his shopping trip, he and Auntie Gavina thought he should have a little gift too. Little my foot! It was half as big as Gabe, but he loves it.



I just hope Schatzi knows it’s not for her. At least it doesn’t have a squeaker.

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Mami and Papi promised to let Susanna answer the door so we’d almost gotten though a whole verse of “White Christmas” by the time Susanna struggled up to let us in. There was Gabe on Unca Carlos shoulders using his ears as handles while Gavina had the Schatzi box and I carried the two twin teddies. (try saying that fast after a few of glasses of Mami’s gluhwein)

Carmine outdid himself with our takeout dinner, especially with less than an hour’s notice and we had some of Mami’s cookies for dessert. She gave me a knowing smile and shook her head when she opened the box where the chocolate rum truffles were…but now they weren’t. As David would say, “Buddy, you are so busted.”

After Gabe gave goodnight besos and thank you hugs and headed upstairs with toy Schatzi and Grandpapi, we made Susanna go sit down and supervise, while the rest of us cleared up the dishes. Later we sat around the fire, singing a few carols, laughing and sharing holiday stories. Friends and family, always the perfect gift no matter the season.


The Grinch by Susanna

I can’t believe my organized Plan A, Plan B Bag Boy thought that somehow finding another cradle, finishing the nursery, Mami and Papi arriving, and Christmas, especially for Gabe would suddenly come together magically. I’m good but even I’m not that good. Every time I turned around he was saying, “It will be alright,” in his calm, soothing voice, until I thought I would scream. I felt like the Grinch.

Urs has been so patient and loving but there was that one time…well maybe a couple of times, but I did apologize and we made up. In my favor is the fact that my brain isn’t completely addled because I’ve been keeping track of all the hot, sweaty make-up sex we’ve missed. Unfortunately the way some of the other moms with twins talk that will be right around the time they go off to school…very funny. I’m sure they were joking…I think.

Then they all surprised me with the matching cradle Grandpapi made. I felt like a completely stupid hairy-nosed wombat. I do realize the hormones from hell are probably surging through my veins but that’s no excuse. Now I understand. “It will be alright,” is Urs’ speak for “I’ve already taken care of it and you’re going to love it.” From now on I need to relax and remember he is my handsome Prince.

Now that Mami and Papi are here I can rest easier. Well not literally since finding a comfortable horizontal sleeping position has become a distant memory. If I were really smart I’d invent some kind of vertical bed with a built in toilet.

Urs about scared me to death the other night. He must have woken up and I was gone so he threw on some jeans and went tearing around the house in a panic looking for me. I’d just drifted off to sleep sitting up in the nursery chair when these hands are shaking me and he’s blathering ninety miles an minute in Swiss German. It’s a wonder I didn’t go into labor right there and then. So he had to go downstairs and bring back warm milk and cookies to calm me down he said, but we both knew the truth.

**********

We have had a few carolers coming round in the evening on occasion but I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why they were so early tonight. What a wonderful surprise: friends stopping by and bringing their own dinner!

I should have known I couldn’t fool Gavina with my Chatty Cathy act on the phone. She knows me too well. After all she was there when it all began with Urs’ note at that first concert. I can still hear her, “It’s only coffee, what can it hurt?” Her advice couldn’t have been more right. Look at the magical life it has brought me!


Company’s Coming by Gabriel


We are having three companies for Christmas. First Grandmami and Grandpapi came. Papa and I are wery happy cuz guess what Grandmami had in her big suitcase? Cookies! Lots and lots of cookies. When we saw them Papa’s eyes crinkled and I squinched up my two eyes real tight like Papa. I had been practicing. Everybody went, “Ha, ha, ha,” and said I was just like Papa. That was silly cuz course I am. I’m Papa’s big boy. I used to be his little boy but now the twins will be the little ones so I get to be the BIG boy. Being the big boy is wery fun.

Grandpapi make anuver cradle just like I was in when I was a little baby. It is in Mommie and Papa’s room. It goes rock, rock, rock but they said I can’t rock the babies unless I ask, else they might get rocked out.

The twins have anuver room for when they grow big, but not as big as me. They have to share. Papa says sharing is good but I say I’m glad I have my own big boy room for only myself and my new toy Schatzi. Real Schatzi can’t go up the stairs till she grows more cuz the vet says her bones might get in the wrong place. My bones have already growed more.

The second company will be Santa. He will come down the chimley and bring presents to all the good boys and girls. That’s me. I’m the good boy one. I’m not so sure about the Mommie’s and Papa’s. I have been trying wery hard not to tizzy cuz the elves might be watching. This morning Papa was trying to leave before I saw him but I was too fast. I wanted to go with, but he said he had to go by himself. I felt a tizzy coming on but then Papa said, “Don’t make me use my opera voice.” When Papa says that it’s kinda like when Mommie gets her bat wings so I knew tizzying wouldn’t be a good idea. Then after my nap, there he was just like he promised and we went shopping.

Then on Christmas morning baby Jesus will come to visit. Mommie and Papa said when I get up I could put baby Jesus in the manger. I helped Mommie put the aminals in the stable and the sheep go by the shepherds. Mary and Joseph are waiting for their little baby just like we’re waiting for the ones in Mommie’s tummy. You know what? I don’t think Papa knows how the babies will get out of Mommie’s tummy. I asked him and he got all red and coughy so I told him what Mommie said, “The same way they got in.” Now he knows too.


A Musical Request by Schatzi

Pardon me, but the stereo is way too loud in this house! Maybe it's my super-sensitive hearing, but lately nearly everything sounds like the Red Army Choir performing holiday rap music. Once when everyone was gone, my Man put on some Wing Ding guitar guy and I just about croaked! I guess he doesn’t he know we Newfie’s are a mellow, laid back breed. Won’t someone please send him some Barry Manilow records for Christmas?


Buhler Family Blog #9
Dec. 24, 2007

Oh Holy Schiesse by Urs

I’m exhausted but the Buhler family can now cross off the Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park from their Christmas ‘to do’ list. This is the first year they’ve had it but if the crowds are any indication, it will become an annual affair. It began early in December and will go through the first week of January.
We all enjoyed strolling, a slow waddle in Susanna’s case, through the German Christmas market and Mami even gave a thumbs up to the wurst and potato pancakes. Then she and Papi took pictures of Gabe in Santa’s Grotto. We’d promised him a ride on the Ferris wheel so we settled Susanna and Mami at a little café while Papi and I took him. It’s a good thing we strapped him in between us. You should have seen him trying to lean over and wave to Mommie and Grandmami. He certainly hasn’t inherited Susanna’s fear of heights.

**********

The next big thing was Christmas Eve. Susanna had the Santa thing planned like it was D Day. Gabe had been wery good about not bothering the wrapped presents under the tree. Now Schatzi was a whole other thing. We should have known she could smell her treats. Next year we’ll just put all of hers in her stocking.
Marcy Kane, our regular babysitter from next door came before Gabe went to bed so we could explain that we’d be at Midnight Mass in case he woke up later. He just loves her, especially since he thinks that the reason she comes over is to help him take care Schatzi.
When we got back from church, Papi and I would walk Marcy home and bring ‘Santa’s’ presents back to put under the tree. (I managed to convince Susanna that our Santa doesn’t believe in wrapping his gifts.) While we were doing that, she and Mami would stuff the stockings. Then we would all try to sleep fast to be ready for Gabriel’s early morning appearance, knowing if he didn’t wake us, Schatzi certainly would…at least that was the plan.

**********

Susanna insisted I accept the choir’s offer to sing with them so I took her roadster since I had to be there much earlier. Papi would drive Mami and Big Houdini in our larger car. Don’t you dare tell her I said that or there’ll be no more blinky-winks for you! I could just see she and Mami going on a cookie strike.
Since she likes to be within waddling distance to the bathroom at all times lately, they strategically picked one of the pews near the back, with Susanna on the aisle. At 11:30 we started a program of carols as the church filled up until there was standing room only. The entire choir along with the accompanying ensemble seemed to really be ‘on’ and as usual I was so caught up in the music my mind barely registered Susanna’s trip to the bathroom during ‘O Holy Night’ just before the last carol.
I was at my solo, “Fall on your knees,” when I noticed Mami get up…and then Papi followed her to the back. ‘Gott, please not now,’ I prayed. ‘O Holy Shiesse,’ I thought. “O hear the angel voices,” I sang. Blessedly my solo ended and I flew out the side door, choir robe and all and dashed round to the front of the church to find Susanna. All I found was Papi.

The Best Laid Plans by Susanna
Gabriel finally got to see Santa! We all just stood there beaming with soppy grins on our faces as he climbed right up to talk to him. There he was with his mop of dark curls and those huge brown eyes, wide with awe, looking up at Santa and earnestly pleading his case for his choice of presents. I thought my heart would melt as his face became more animated and he started talking with his hands, just like Urs does.
Santa must have asked him if he’d been good this year because the curls shook in a tiny ‘no’ then changed in mid-shake into an emphatic yes punctuated with an angelic smile and a blinky-wink. Papi was so enthralled he almost forget to take a picture.
I told Urs he’d better not be asking for another bruver or sister because next Christmas I plan on being in Switzerland wearing a coat with every button done up…comfortably. He just kissed me, laughed and said, “Ja, Houdini,” as he patted my tummy and gazed appreciatively as Gabe worked his magic. Poor Santa never had a chance, but then Gabe is my son too.
Then Urs and Papi took him on this humongus Ferris wheel, 50 meters tall! Urs said he was shouting for Mami and I to watch him but all we saw was him trying to wave, still holding his bag of popcorn as it drifted down like snow. I’m sure the people in the car underneath loved that! What will be next? The London Eye? Bungee jumping? Skydiving? Thank goodness Mami was there to keep me calm.

**********

Gabe isn’t the only one I needed to hide presents from. Several times I caught Bag Boy trying to munge and shake packages under the tree. What a sneak! Once he even had a foil-wrapped one suspiciously near his nose. How desperate is that?

**********

Now I know why I was obsessing over the cradle and getting everything arranged and ready for Mami and Papi. I was just nesting. Stupid me! I should have guessed. After all at my last appointment Dr. Ziegler did say I could go any time. But now? On Christmas!

I was so focused on Urs I hardly noticed the little twinges at the beginning of the carol service. He looked like such a beautifully handsome angel with his dark curls, brilliant white shirt and red choir robe, completely lost in the music. Then a song would end and his eyes would search and meet with mine in such a sweet gentle smile that I almost forgot to breathe.

As the twinges because true contractions, Mami and I shared a look, like an exciting secret. I must admit being more than a little nervous about this unknown journey my two babies and I had begun. She must have sensed this as she leaned over. “It is time, ja? It will go well. Do not worry, dear heart,” she said with a comforting smile as she took my hand and nodded wisely.

Had Urs known, he would have been dismayed by his little ones poor timing however he would have been elated with their time management. They didn’t waste a second. My contractions were four minutes apart and over a minute long when I checked my watch just after 1:15 a.m. as Urs was in full throttle with his solo. Since there was only one more carol before the mass exodus, I decided to make my move now so Mami and I could beat the traffic out of the parking lot before something really bad happened like my water breaking. Papi could wait for Urs and hopefully keep him calm. Unfortunately I didn’t count on Urs streaking out of the side door, robes billowing. So as we whizzed off round the corner and out of sight with Mami at the wheel, I caught a glimpse of the red flash frantically looking around and gesticulating wildly to poor Papi. Perhaps we should have waited I thought as the next contraction began.


The Magic Word By Gabriel

“Look Gabriel, you’re making it snow!” That’s what Grandpapi told me when my arm and my popcorn waved to Mommie and Grandmami WAY down on the ground. They were teeny tiny cuz I was wery high on the top of the sky wheel. It tickled my tummy when we came down. Papa and Grandpapi’s tummies got tickled too cuz they went, “Ha, ha, ha,” just like me. We went round and round and it was funnest.

And know what else I did? I sat on Santa and he asked me what I wanted him to bring me. I said I wanted some tools like Papa has so when we play race cars and motorcycles I could fix them like he does. I want to be just like my Papa.

Santa asked me if I’d been a good little boy. I said no, I was a good BIG boy, cept a few times I had to go to ‘stralia. Then Santa said he brings toys even to ‘stralia. I said could he just bring mine under our Christmas tree please cuz I don’t like to go to ‘stralia.

I ‘membered to tell him about my girl sister and the uver twinlet but I didn’t know what they wanted cuz they’re still in Mommie’s tummy and please could he bring Schatzi a wery strong toy ‘cept NO squeaker please. Mommie said she was wery proud of me when I told her I used the magic word: please.

**********

Mommie keeps putting lots of presents under the Christmas tree, cept not any more for Schatzi. She tried to open hers already with her teeth cuz the fingers on her paws are all stuck together. Papa says that’s so she can swim good but I’d raver have fingers to open presents.

I can’t play with the presents cuz they’re not mine. Mommie and Papa said Santa doesn’t have time to wrap all the presents for good boys and girls so that’s how I’ll know they’re from him.

Finally Christmas Eve. I told Schatzi but I don’t think she was listening. Tonight when we are sleeping Santa brings the presents but not if we don’t sleep real tight and no peeking. Papa says.

Marcy came over so Schatzi won’t get into trouble while Grandmami and Grandpapi and Mommie and Papa go to church. She helps me baby sit her and she reads stories to us, ‘cept sometimes Schatzi jumps down and leaves before the story is done, but not me. I like stories.

The bestest thing is we put milk and cookies out for Santa cuz Grandmami says he LOVES cookies just like her two cookie monsters, Papa and Gabriel. I wonder how she knows that? Oh, and I almost forgot the reindeers. We had to hurry and look in the ‘frigerator. Mommie found some carrots way in the bottom. They were a little bendy but when I asked Papa, he said reindeers like them that way cuz they’re easier to chew.

When I gave everybody a hug and kiss goodnight they told me to sleep fast so Santa would come soon. I can hardly wait!


Buhler Rules by Schatzi

How come nobody ever told me about the present rule? If I can reach it and it’s food, it’s fair game, right? Wrong.

We’re playing Buhler rules here which means even if my nose smells it and my teeth grab it, if it’s wrapped in paper, it’s verboten, a no-no, taboo, off limits, banned, etc. What ever happened to possession is nine-tenths of the law? It’s not nice to tease a poor, helpless aminal…I mean animal. Sorry about that. I honestly had no idea I was bilingual till I came to live here and now look at me, almost proficient in Swgengabe. If it weren’t for my walks in the park I’d never get a chance to speak dog.

Buhler Family Blog #10
Dec. 25, 2007


Little Fingers by Urs

Gone! I can’t believe Susanna didn’t even wait for me and Papi just let her go. Well I guess he didn’t stand a chance against Mami AND Susanna, but still. Then as we’re heading to the car, Susanna called to remind me to go home and get her hospital bag and organize Santa before I came to the hospital. Her voice may have been telling me there’s plenty of time but her breathing sure didn’t. Thanks for reminding me to take off that damned red robe, Papi. Sorry I made you run so fast.

She must have called Doreen and Frank too because they were already bringing Santa’s gifts over and putting them under the tree. I guess in this case I should be glad Schatzi’s idea of protection is to knock you over and lick you to death rather than bark the house down.

By the time Papi and I got home the only thing left to do was put Gabe’s special gifts by the tree and run upstairs to check on him. Marcy said she hadn’t heard a peep from him.
As I looked at his sweet chubby face and his fingers curled tightly around his blanket I thought of how he wrapped those same little fingers around mine the first time I held him. In a few hours would two new little hands do the same?

**********

Then Papi shooed me off to the hospital, after he made sure I had Susanna’s suitcase; after all he is the Buhler patriarch. When I got there, I was beginning to think this really wasn’t my night. After getting her room number at the nurses’ station I skidded into the room and this time there was only Mami…no Susanna! Where was she now?

Schiesse! Was I too late? I knew I should have come straight here… We didn’t have plenty of time… She’ll think…
Suddenly Mami’s stern voice silenced me and I was four years old again and probably in trouble by the look in her eye. No I was not late. They’d just taken Susanna down for an untrasound to see how the babies were positioned. Susanna was doing fine. I needed to calm down. I took a deep breath and started to unpack the music we’d chosen.

Then came THE LOOK. “Urs, no books.”

“But last time I was just…,” I motioned helplessly with my hands.

“Urs!”

“Ja, Mami, no books ever again,” I promised fervently.

“I go home now to be with Papi and Gabriel when he wakes up. Call us, ja?” Mami’s eyes met and held mine, the mirror image of her own.

“Ja, Mami as soon as they’re born,” I promised with a smile.

With a fierce misty-eyed hug, an encouraging nod and, a kiss for “my tender-hearted one,” Mami left.

**********

A few minutes later Susanna got back and the ultrasound showed both babies were still head down. Dr. Ziegler said it would be good to walk for awhile so we did. Then the hard transition part started and this time I didn’t read. I talked, hummed, sang, whatever it took to keep her focused. Ackshully I’ve never been so proud of her. She was working so hard and was so brave. I guess I missed seeing some of this with Gabe because that was when she sent me and my book to maternity Australia. This time I did need to leave once… to change into scrubs but all the time I was there she never asked me to go somewhere. Well there were a few looks but no words.

Then we were hurrying to the delivery room. It looked about the same as when Gabe was born except for more equipment on hand and it was wery crowded. Each baby had their own team waiting for them in case of complications.

This time as I held her we seemed more…I don’t know, kinda sure of ourselves I guess. Maybe it’s just that now we knew a little more what to expect, even though there would be two babies. When Susanna gave that final push and we heard our daughter’s cry, mezzo soprano btw, it was almost as if she was working so hard she didn't even realize for a fleeting moment that she was done. Then we were laughing and crying with joy as Dr. Ziegler laid her on Susanna’s stomach.

"Merry Christmas my Foxhole friend,” whispered Susanna tiredly.

“Thank you, Foxhole friend, I’ll always be here for you,” I promised.

I remember Dr. Ziegler’s head lifting up as his face took on a puzzled look.

We just looked at each other and smiled. “Foxhole friends are forever. You can always count on them, especially to help you cry happy tears.”

I remember thinking, she’s so tired can she do it all over again? But, a few pushes later, our other daughter ‘sang’ her way into the world at 5:12.

“You’re amazing, Houdini. You did it! Twins! Woo Hoo!”
“We, Bag Boy. We did it together. Always together.”

After the second twin was checked, cleaned and swaddled, they were allowed to stay with us for a little while. Susanna nursed one a little bit, as I held the other in my arms and then we switched until it was time for Susanna and the girls to be taken to her room.

It was in those first few minutes that it happened, almost without my realization and certainly without any conscious thought. Yes, those tiny perfectly formed fingers on those two newborn hands had also wound around my finger just as Gabe’s had done. But these were daughters, gentle, little girls in their Mother’s image, needing the special protection and care of a Father, not just a Papa. Already they were a force to be reckoned with for they had captured my heart and with their tiny grasp had already begun to wrap me around their little fingers.


Urs Does Better by Susanna

All the way to the hospital I kept looking at my huge stomach and thinking, “I hope they’ve decided which one goes first.” By the time Mami and I got to the hospital though all I cared about was the babies being born safe and healthy and having Urs with me.

Poor Urs! He sounded like he didn’t know if he was on foot or horseback when I called. I hope Papi can calm him down a little before he gets here. Thank God Gabe is a sound sleeper. Doreen checked with Marcy and it only took one story and he was out like a light.

At least Mami and Papi will be there when Gabe wakes up. I can just picture him still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, curls every which way, running to wake them so they can go see if Santa has been there. I so wanted to see the surprise and excitement on his face when he finds what’s under the tree. I wonder what he’ll think of his special gifts? At the rate I’m going here maybe Urs will be home before Gabe gets up. Wouldn’t that be nice…for both of us! Now that would truly be magical.

**********

As I was being wheeled back from the ultrasound here comes Mami down the hallway with a big smile that got even bigger when I gave her a thumbs-up about the babies.

“Urs will do better this time, dear heart. Do not worry. We’ll be there for Gabriel. Now you and Urs go add to your family. Papi and I love you.”

**********

I don’t think Urs or I have ever been more relieved to see each other! Dr. Ziegler examined me and said I was almost there and a little walking should do the trick. Urs came back in and we walked and then kind of slow danced through the contractions as Urs massaged my back. I could swear the shy twin must have no sense of direction and was attempting to exit through my spine. It wasn’t long before I knew it was time to get back into bed.

Thank you Mami; Bag Boy, bless his heart, did do better this time. I’m not too sure if he’d say the same about me though. At about 4:45 I told him to get a nurse. I was ready to push. I could tell when she came in that she didn't believe it, but sure enough, I was ready.

With the next contraction my water broke with a huge explosion! It was like I was a famous performing artist and poor Urs and the nurse in the front row were definitely covered! I don’t know who was more surprised…or embarrassed. For the nurse it was definitely a “not happy Jan” moment but if living with Gabe, Schatzi, and I had taught Bag Boy one thing, it’s to go with the flow. So Urs the Unflappable simply took a towel, wiped the shock off his face and the fluid off his Armani and quipped, “Houdini, you’ve never been THIS juicy before!”

**********

Doing those fast costume changes on tour stood him in good stead. In the time it took to wheel me into the delivery room and give three or four pushes he’d returned in scrubs and taken his now usual place on the bed behind me. As he reached over my shoulders to hold my hands he whispered in my ear, “I’m not wearing any underwear.” Now was that supposed to help focus or distract me? I would have given him a good thump except for the fact I was trying to laugh, breathe, and push simultaneously.

**********

Finally Urs said, "I can see her head, it's right there, you can do it Houdini, just one more push.” All I could hear was Urs’ voice urging me on so with the next contraction I gave it all I had and we welcomed our daughter to the world. Then suddenly Dr. Ziegler was holding her up for us to see! Urs might call it her opera voice but to me it was the most beautiful yell in the world.

She was suctioned, Urs leaned over and cut the cord, and she was taken by one of the teams to be cleaned, weighed, wrapped and introduced to her Mommie. Then Urs held her as I had a few minutes to relax while a nurse kept pressure on my stomach to keep the other baby from turning.

We had both picked out a girl and a boy name. We agreed that I could name the girl, and Urs could name the second twin. As soon as she was born I wanted to change the name I’d picked since she was born on Christmas. “Can I change my choice to Noelle?” I begged. “Perfect choice,” he agreed, as Noelle voiced her approval or was it a protest?

**********

The nurse took the baby and it was time again but it only took a few pushes before the other twin was born! I'm not sure who said she was a girl, but at first all I could see were feet. Then she was handed to me and I started crying all over again. Another beautiful daughter! A soprano according to Urs.

Again Urs cut the cord and the other team took over. After she was cleaned, checked, and wrapped up, Urs and I looked at each other and started to cry as we held our newborn twin daughters. Everything had gone even better than we had imagined and oh so quickly. There was only 10 minutes between the time Noelle was born and her sister joined her.

“Another beautiful job, Susanna. You are getting to be an expert at this. Only seven more to go,” Dr. Ziegler teased as he winked at Urs.

“I love you Houdini. You did good.”

“Thank you Bag Boy. I did have a little help you know. I love you too.”

“Somehow it doesn’t seem right for you not to have your first choice since we have two girls. After all what self-respecting Swiss family doesn’t have a Heidi in it?”

“Bag Boy, are you sure?” I beamed, giving him my best I’ve-just-given-birth-to-your-twin-girls-so-how-can-you-say-no-to-me smile.

“Of course not, Houdini. I’ll just use one of my choices next time,” he whispered cheekily as he kissed me before I could say another word. Whatever made me think I could outcharm the Uber charmer?


Surprise Presents by Gabriel

He came! He came! Santa came to our house last night and left lots of presents for good BIG boys! That’s me, Gabe.

This is how it happened. First I heard a little noise when I was sleeping tight like Papa and Mommie said. It was probly Santa’s reindeer but I told myself to go back to sleep else Santa might skip me cuz I wasn’t sleeping tight. So I did.

Then I woked up again and it was the phone going ring, ring, ring. Does Santa call when your presents are ready? I hopped out of bed to go see, but first I had to potty. I wanted to hurry fast and not wash my hands after, but I didn’t cuz I just knew Papa would say, “Gabriel, did you wash your hands?”.

Grandmami was in the hall just holding the phone and smiling. I asked her if that was Santa but she said it was Papa and he and Mommie had an extra special present for me but it was at the hospital. Mommie was taking good care of it and we could go see it later when Papa got home.

She told me to put my slippers on so we could go downstairs and see what Santa had left for good BIG boys. That’s me, Gabe. I hurried wery fast.

When we came down the stairs, oh no! That Santa must have left Schatzi’s kitchen gate open and she opened ALL her presents…everywhere. Papers, strings, and Schatzi toys all over. Grandmami put on her bat wings, did click, click, click with her tongue and shook her head. I think Schatzi knew this was badder than the squeaker cuz she headed straight to the door for doggie ‘stralia. Grandpapi opened the door to let her out and there was Papa! Schatzi said hello and kept on going.

I was wery happy to see Papa and he was wery happy too. He swinged me high up in the air and didn’t put me down and we gave each uver big hugs and kisses. “Merry Christmas, Gabriel. Let’s go see what Santa left for good BIG boys.” “That’s me,” I said as he laughed and hugged Grandmami and Grandpapi with his uver arm.

Then we saw what Santa brought. I got tools! Just like Papa does. There’s a saw and a hammer. It’s plastic so Mommie and Grandmami won’t worry and a measure tape, and nuts and a wrench and a pretend drill. You know what? Santa left me a tool belt and even Papa doesn’t have one, only BIG Gabe.

There were Tinkertoys for Papa and me to build with and my stocking had toy cars and trucks and candy and an orange. I wanted to eat a candy cane ‘cept Papa said not till after breakfast so next we opened presents not from Santa. There were ice skates from Grandpapi and Grandmami made me a sweater. It is red, my bestest color.

“We forgot to put baby Jesus in the manger,” said Papa.

Grandmami got him from the kitchen drawer where he was sleeping till Christmas and Papa let me put him in the manger. Then I sat on Papa’s lap and he gave me a big strong cuddle.

“You know,” he said, “how you just put baby Jesus in his bed? Well in a few days Mommie will bring home two special presents for our family and she’ll put them in their cradles upstairs. The twins were born last night and you have two new little baby sisters.”

“Two girl sisters?” I thought about this; then I counted.

“Papa, you and I will be the only boys?”

“Um…yes I guess so Gabe but our girls need us to do things that are too hard for them and protect them and be strong.”

“Like when I tell Schatzi to go potty and she does and you tell Mommie to bake cookies and she does we’re like the bosses of them. Right? Can I be the boss of my two girl sisters?”

“Ah Gabriel, if it only worked that way…but you can certainly try.”

“Can we go see them now?”

“Mommie and the babies are sleeping right now but later today we’ll all go see them OK? But do you know what your new sisters did? They left you a Christmas present. Let’s go look.”

Papa said to look on the tree and there it was, hanging right in front. Papa read it for me, “BIG Brother, Gabriel”.

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And know what else? There was anuver present. I tored the paper off and it was a shirt that said, “I’m the BIG Brother!” Now everybody will know me. TWO presents…I like having two girl sisters.

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Decisions, Decisions by Schatzi

Deer Santa Paws, Ken you show mee how to open the frigerator? Shot-Z
**********
Deer Santa Paws, Thank U for taking away my Peepuls’ memory. This is eevn better. Kan you save the frigerator for next year? Shot-Z
**********

Boy oh boy oh boy! I think I’ve died and gone to Doggy Heaven cuz all my Peepul just went upstairs a few minutes ago and guess what? They forgot to close the doggy gate in the kitchen. Free at last!

Now let’s see, what should I try first? Original Beef Hooves? Poochie Chew Dog Treats? Piggy Twists? No, it’s gotta be these Dingo Double Meat in the Middley Chews. That Australian shepard I met at the park last week just went on and on about them. If Heaven has a scent (and a taste) I’m sure this is it!

Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?

............................

to be continued

Buhler Family Blog #11
Dec. 25, 2007


Bigger and Bigger by Urs

Poor Schatzi! What with opening presents and telling Gabe about the babies we forgot all about her. It’s a good thing he heard her bark. Then when he let her in she could have won a Canine Academy Award with the sad look she gave us after she sniffed all around and didn’t find her treats.

**********

Then Susanna called and I panicked for just a second but everything was fine. She just wanted to say Noelle and Heidi had a good feed but it had been rather tricky with both at once and something about footballs. Strange, I don’t remember reading about footballs in any of the baby books. Anyway they were sleeping now and she was planning on doing the same in a few minutes.

And could Mami please bring her some real food when we came this afternoon? And had I remembered Gabe’s surprise in the garage? Oops! “Yes, Houdini, as soon as I hang up. He’s right here with his big brother shirt on over his jammies. He insisted.” See what I mean about being the boss, Gabe.

Then it was Gabe’s turn. “Hi Mommie. This is Gabe. Know what? I got presents from my two girl sisters. I’m the big bruver. My shirt says. It’s OK Mommie we can keep them and Papa says…”

“…that we love you and we’ll see you soon.”

**********


I thought I’d never get Gabe out of the garage with his surprise present but finally Mami and Papi came to the rescue with promises that he could go for a ride with Grandpapi and Schatzi AFTER he got dressed and had breakfast. He left a trail of clothes all the way up the stairs. Of course he had to wear his Big Brother shirt. I have a feeling it’s going to be his favorite like HIM is mine.

He practically inhaled Mami’s pancakes; then trying to help him brush his teeth was about like playing one of David’s video games. Gott, I just had a scary thought. What if David brings back a video game for Gabe for Christmas? Do they even have them for children his age? What about playing outdoors with other children or reading with Susanna or playing with his toys? Maybe I’ll just casually mention how much Gabe likes to play outdoors when I call him later with the news. Listen to me obsessing about a toy! How my priorities have changed. This being a father can really get complicated. I’m beginning to realize more every day all the double responsibilities she handles while I’m gone and now with the twins…

**********

After Papi, Gabe, and Schatzi left, Mami sent me (as Gabe would say, her big boy, that’s me Urs) upstairs for a shower and a nap. The next thing I knew Gabe’s curls were tickling my chin as he snuggled into my chest ‘to help Papa rest’. Mami woke her resting boys two hours later.

**********

I couldn’t have been prouder of Gabe’s behavior at the hospital. He may have been a little intimidated at first but when we opened the door to Susanna’s room, he was up on the bed in a flash hugging and kissing his Mommie.


You can’t imagine the feeling I had putting my daughters into the arms of my parents. I felt so humble and grateful to witness this circle of life. I think I remember saying something about Susanna coming into my heart and thinking I couldn’t love someone more. Then Gabriel was born and it was like my heart expanded to welcome him into that same love and now my heart is opening up again to welcome our two daughters. Then Gabe brought us all down to earth by asking what ‘spanded’ meant so I told him it meant grows bigger.

**********

Later that night after I gave him his bath, we were snuggling and reading his newest book about the babies. Susanna puts them on a certain shelf in his bookcase and calls them his ‘big bruver’ books.

This one is called Mama’s Milk. As I read it I had to laugh at myself. Before we had Gabe I’d probably have choked at the thought of reading this period, let alone to my child, but now I just carry on matter-of-factly, well almost, and he doesn’t bat an eyelash. In fact this one has some pretty amazing facts. For instance, a dolphin calf holds its breath while feeding underwater. And did you know that a platypus' baby is called a puggles? Or that kangaroo milk is pink?

He’d been pretty quiet and I thought maybe he’d drifted off but evidently he’d been thinking. Right between the platypus and the kangaroo he sat up and started unsnapping his jammies. “See how big my heart growed Papa. Just like the Grinch. There’s room for lots of babies…but next time could we please get a bruver?”

“We can certainly try, Gabe, we can certainly try. Would you like to know a little secret? Papa’s heart growed a little bigger just this minute. I love you Gabriel.”

“I love you too Papa.”


Together Again by Susanna

I don't believe I've ever been as happy as I was when Urs brought Gabe and Mami and Papi back this afternoon. When that door pushed open and Gabe piled onto the bed and hugged me my world was complete. I looked at Urs, blinking back tears and I know we were both thinking: when had our tiny helpless baby boy grown into this beautiful, loving curly-haired ‘big bruver’?

Next Urs’ eyes softened with love and his face broke into a huge grin as he led Mami and Papi over to the twins rolling cribs.

“Mami and Papi, meet your two new granddaughters, Noelle Charlotte Buhler and Heidi Elisabeth Buhler.”

As he put Noelle into Mami’s waiting arms and Heidi into Papi’s, they softly crooned their introductions. If Urs could have crowed he would have; he was so proud. As it was he stood beaming with an expression that said, ‘Aren’t they beautiful? Didn’t we do good?’

When he pulled out his camera and took pictures of them he could have taken it in the dark and used their smiles for a flash.

Holding out his hand to Gabe he asked if he’d like to meet his new sisters. Mami and Papi sat down in chairs and Gabe scampered off the bed, took his hand, and walked over to them.

He peered first at one, then at the other. “Which is which?”

“This is Heidi,” said Papi.

“And this is Noelle,” said Mami.

Gabe looked at Mami quizzically. “Did she do something wrong? You told her, ‘No’.”

“Oh Gabe, that’s part of her name, No-elle,” laughed Mami, “because she was born on Christmas.”

“Can I call her Elle wifout the no part?” Gabe’s almond shaped chocolaty brown eyes asked as he looked up at Urs and I, then at Grandmami and Grandpapi.

“Ja, yes, that would be fine,” we agreed with smiles.

Then he leaned over and addressed each one.

“Hi Elle and Heidi. I’m Gabe. I’m your big bruver. Papa says we will take care of you cuz that’s what boys do and I could be the boss of you. Oh and thank you for my shirt.”

“Look Mommie! She wants to hold hands,” Gabe’s face shone with excitement as Elle grasped his finger.

The next minute he bounded back up onto the bed and sitting back on his knees excitedly began, mouth and hands working as one. “I ‘most forgot the bestest surprise. Santa left a ride on motorcycle just like Papa’s in the garage for good BIG boys. That’s me Gabe. And it’s this big!” Little arms flung out as wide as possible. “Know what color? Red! And he brought a helmet and Grandpapi took Schatzi for a walk and I rode my motorcycle all the way. I went pedal, pedal, pedal, wery fast.”



**********


Mami could see I was getting tired so she and Papi took Gabe downstairs for something to drink while I dug into her care package. Rosti, bread and sausage might not be a traditional Christmas dinner but it smelled divine! “Let’s hope the twins like it,” I teased Urs as he sat down on the bed beside me.

“Of course they will. They are half Swiss after all,” he zinged back with a straight face.

“I see you have a new t-shirt. From one of your admiring fans?”



“Yes, she’s a silly-nosed wombat but she’s my best fan and I love her. I can’t help myself and she does give me the most beautiful babies.” As Urs began kissing me I decided maybe Christmas dinner could be postponed awhile. But just as awhile was turning into quite awhile the kissing stopped and he stood up. “So I guess I’ll just have to put it away for a few weeks,” he said with an exaggerated sigh. “You wouldn’t want me to get arrested for fraud now would you?” he asked with a killer grin and a final hidden kiss.

“OK then Mr. Fraud. Hand me my Christmas dinner so I can build up my strength for your T-shirt,” I giggled.

While I ate, Urs told me how cute Gabe was on the phone telling Unca Carlos and Auntie Gavina about the babies.

“Yes...si, Unca Carlos.” His head and his curls nodded up and down.
“Two girl sisters, one, two.” Up went two fingers as he counted.
“Dos...hermanas…del...bebé. Si, Unca Carlos I promise.”

**********

At least Heidi and Noelle waited until my dinner was almost finished before they demanded theirs. I had to laugh at Urs. It was like his house was burning down and he couldn’t decide what to take with him. Which baby should he pick up? So I saved him and grabbed the closest one, Heidi.
I knew he hadn’t understood about the football way of holding the babies to nurse but with me talking him through the logistics we got the babies going with only a few false starts. One thing for sure it really helps to keep your sense of humor and he is so funny sometimes. You should have heard him cheerleading for the girls, patting them, rubbing their heads and encouraging them. “C’mon Noelle, you can do it. Oops, now see how easy that was. There you go. Wow! You were wery hungry weren’t you. Oh no, Heidi you fell off… again! Now don’t go to sleep, you need to fill up that tummy so you and Mommie can get some sleep.”
Then it was crunch time…poopy diapers, definitely low on Bag Boy’s totem pole of favorite things to do. It’s not that he couldn’t handle it but… With Gabe it had been no biggie. I didn’t mind any kind of mess and he would always help with baths or stories or whatever else I asked when he was home. However today, he pitched right in and by the time everyone came back we were both cuddling a sweet-smelling daughter.

Before they left, Gabe asked to hold his girl sisters so we sat him in the chair with pillows on his lap and both sides and reminded him to be gentle and sit very still. I think the Buhlers love the camera as much as the camera loves them because the smile he gave Papa was a pure Kodak moment. What a little ham! I can tell already he’ll be a heartbreaker. Then as if he suddenly remembered something, he bent down and gave each twin a gentle kiss on the head. “Besos from Unca Carlos…and your big bruver. That’s me Gabe.”

My two boys gave me big hugs and kisses and as Gabe left he summed up the day. With a huge smile he proclaimed with two fingers shown on each hand, "Two girl sisters!"


My Turn by Gabe

Call, call, call, I think Grandmami and Grandpapi probly telled everybody in Swissland about Elle and Heidi but finally it was my turn. Papa called Uncle Seb and Auntie Juli and then I got to tell Am-ee that I’m a big bruver cuz I have two girl sisters, the kind with the same face.

One girl sister is Elle and one girl sister is Heidi. I think we’ll need more time out chairs cuz Elle got in trouble already. They look kinda red and wrinkly. They have hair but not curly as Papa and me.

They can’t play yet. Mommie says all they can do right now is sleep, sleep, sleep, eat, eat, eat and potty, potty, potty. Know what they eat? Milk from Mommie’s breasts cuz we’re mammals like cows and even Schatzi. Mommie and me read a book all about mammal mommies and babies and how we get milk from our mommies, even doffins under the water.

Know what? My two girl sisters gave me presents: a sign on the Christmas tree to tell everybody I’m Gabriel the BIG bruver and a T-shirt too. I have it on now. I told Am-ee maybe she could ask Unca Seb and Auntie Juli for a boy bruver or a girl sister for Christmas and she would get presents like me. And the best is I am the boss of them ‘cept Papa says not always.

Santa brought me a red motorcycle and a helmet like Papa’s. I pedal fast and say ‘vroom, vroom’. Maybe I’ll let Am-ee ride it one time…after I show her how.

Guess what? Santa even brought presents for Elle and Heidi. How did he know they’d be borned for Christmas I wonder. Papa brought them to show Mommie. Everybody kept saying all the time, “Where did it come from? Where did it come from?”

I said, “Silly Mommie and Papa. (I didn’t call them wombat cuz that’s a timeout word) “Santa brought them. It’s Christmas you know.”




Busted by Schatzi

I should have known it wouldn’t last. Those bat wings are never good news. I knew better than to expect my Man to save me so I gave him a half-wag and hightailed it to the farthest reaches of doggy ‘stralia.

For a while I thought they’d forgotten about me. Not that I mind the cold or the damp, but I am a people person…um dog and I was lonely. FINALLY my Boy let me in, but it was too late. All my doggy treats were put up high, wery high. If a dog barks her head off in the forest of doggy ‘stralia, and no human hears her, is she still a bad dog?

I just love this Schatzi dog so much.... And seeing all the pictures that you had added to this
story just puts a smile on my face each time I read The Blogs..... Love it Sue, Just love it.

Thelma...

Buhler Family Blogs # 12


Belated Christmas Newsletter

Merry Belated Christmas,
As you all may know by now my magical wife presented us with the best Christmas present this year and I don't know how she'll ever top this one. Our beautiful twin daughters, Noelle Charlotte and Heidi Elisabeth made their debut appearance on Christmas morning at 5:02 AM and then again at 5:12 AM. I was there with Susanna as I was when Gabriel was born.

Susanna definitely surprised me the night before by having to leave the Midnight Services, quickly followed by Mami, while I was in the choir singing "O Holy Night" and couldn't leave! Thank you Papi for waiting on me.

Our little man, Gabriel, is just beside himself because in addition to getting a new puppy after his second birthday, he is now the "big brother" to our new Christmas Angels. He can't wait to take the girls outside and teach them to "go potty" like he did with Schatzi. He's wery proud of his accomplishment in teaching Schatzi this new trick. Right now, though, all he wants to do is sit and hold the girls and gently rub their heads while telling us that they are "Gabe's babies!" I can see now that Susanna and Nanny T. will have more than enough "help" when I have to be away occasionally.

We feel very blessed and hope that you'll understand why our annual newsletter was delayed. Gabe is already wondering what Santa will bring him next year! Susanna and I just look at each other and smile...

Love,
Urs, Susanna, Gabe, Noelle, Heidi and Schatzi

Did you notice I've been gone? Just got back from my aunt's 90th birthday party in Santa Fe. Here's Wednesday and Thursday. Enjoy!


Buhler Family Blog #13
Jan. 15, 2008

A New Name and a Near Miss by Urs

The twins are three weeks old today and finally we’re getting into a routine. For awhile there though I was seriously thinking of buying a time out chair large enough for Gabe and I together. Let’s just say that first week home Houdini was less than magical.

Things had been fairly calm that evening. Gabe and the twins were asleep and we were getting ready for our hopefully three-hour nap between feedings. Everyone says it won’t be long before Noelle and Heidi will be sleeping longer between feedings. Gott please let that be next week. I now fully understand the meaning of the phrase ‘sleeping like a baby’. You sleep whenever the babies sleep.

So being a loving, understanding (or at least trying to) husband I tenderly kiss her and proceed to shower her with gifts, well two ackshully.

She did love the gold charm necklace I gave her with three calendar charms, for Gabe, Noelle and Heidi. Each one had their birth month and birthstone on the date and their name on the back.

It was the sexy nightie that threw her into a tizzy. I just wanted to show her how much I love her as the mother of our children AND as my wife. I guess even my Swiss timing was no match for Houdini’s hormones. She seemed excited and happy, thanked me, and gave me a tender kiss. Then she opened it and the great flood began. What had I done?

Between the tears and snuffs I finally made out, “industrial strength nursing bra”, “like a leaky faucet”, and “Elsie the cow”. Aha, now at least I had a clue. After calming her down and drying her off I reminded her I’d stood up pretty well to all her juicy-ness so far and if she was Elsie the cow then I must be Mr. Elsie and by the way just who was Elsie? By this time she was smiling so I knew it would OK. She informed me when she was growing up she had an Elsie the cow mug. Elsie was the mascot for Borden milk and no I couldn’t be Mr. Elsie. I could be Elmer the bull, Elsie’s husband.




Later, as we cuddled to sleep, I reminded her of the things that make us real like the love and pride I have for her as my wife and mother of our children.

**********

Nanny Tibble is back and I’m thinking of starting a petition to have her declared a national treasure. Between her and both sets of grandparents Susanna and I have been able to make sure Gabe hasn’t felt deprived of quality time with just us.

Since you can't sit down and logically explain to a toddler how you could never stop loving him—we have to let our actions do the talking, by letting time spent with us provide that reassurance.

Of course it’s not as much time as he’s been used to but he knows when it’s ‘Gabe’ time that is exactly what it means. He will have Mommie’s or Papa’s undivided attention even if we have to hand off crying twins…well unless they’re hungry but I’ll let Susanna tell you about that.

We are both wery proud of how he’s taken to his new little sisters. He loves helping out and being the older ‘bruver’. I vaguely remember how great it felt when Ingrid was born and I wasn’t the baby of the family anymore.

You should see how seriously he takes the little ‘jobs’ or responsibilities we’ve given him. It’s a good thing the baby wipes pop out one at a time or he’d be handing the whole stack to Mommie, Papa, or Nanny T. Don’t looked so surprised. Yes, I do ‘do’ diapers; even messy ones, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention it to the Ubers.

Did I mention poor Schatzi is beginning to get brush-phobia? At first we would let Gabe ‘help’ us brush her. Then he decided she needed extra brushes. Now she thinks it’s a chase game but if he ever manages to catch her look out! Run wery fast Schatzi. Run and hide.

And for some reason he feels his duty as big ‘bruver’ is to report on Noelle and Heidi, especially if it involves bodily fluids. “Mommie, Heidi’s diaper is burping again.”

**********

Ever since Grandpapi’s been here Gabe has been like his little shadow. I had to laugh one night after supper. There was Grandpapi rocking in his chair reading the paper and right beside him there was Gabe rocking away in his little rocker. Then Gabe would steal a sideways glance up at Grandpapi from under those long lashes but Grandpapi would pretend not to see. Then Grandpapi would steal a peek down at Gabe as he was ‘reading’ his German picture book and break out into a huge grin. Then they’d both look at each other and Grandpapi would put down his paper, open his arms and Gabe would jump up and snuggle in Grandpapi’s lap for a story. I can hardly wait to see what he’ll pick up while Grandpa John is here.

**********

Meanwhile in the bathroom yesterday morning Gabe decided he needed to shave like Papa was doing. First he dragged his little step stool up to the other sink, “So I can be tall as Papa.” I hadn’t put on my shirt yet so of course Gabe had to take his off. Then I found an old razor without the blade. Next came the lather. Ready, set, shave. He’d look, he’d copy, he’d look again and shave some more. Then it happened.

“Papa we don’t have breasts like mommies.”

My right sideburn had a near death experience. Reflexively my eyes looked down at my chest as my suddenly limp fingers released the razor and it slid into the sink. I watched the tiny knick on my chin turn red, then tore a piece of tissue and put it on the cut.

“That’s right, Gabe, we don’t.”
I slowly turned off the faucet, leaned toward the sink, gripped the sides with my hands and waited for the rest. Knowing Gabe there would be more. There always is more.

“Then what DO we have Papa?”
Gabe’s voice was slightly muffled as he dropped his chin and scrutinized his chest, then turned his head sideways and looked up at mine.

Think Urs, think! Why didn’t you pay more attention the other day when Susanna mentioned he’d been asking about breasts. You’ve gotta come up with something he’ll understand and won’t be too embarrassing if he brings it up in public… and you know he will.

“Chesties! Yes that’s what we’ve got Gabe, chesties.” I gasped triumphantly as I released my white-knuckled grip on the sink.

Gabe surveyed his chesties and resumed shaving. So did his Papa, being wery careful to stay far away from his sideburns.

Downs and Ups by Susanna

Poor Bag Boy, that first week I was home I should have worn a warning label. “You have the ability to arouse various emotions in me: please choose carefully.” My hormones were all over the place.

I know he must have thought I was possessed when I opened his beautiful gift and started blubbering like an idiot. It was just that I looked at myself and thought, Can’t you see I’m bountiful Mother Earth here, soggy, nurturing, and feeding. The lithe, graceful Goddess of Beauty and Love doesn’t live here anymore. I mean I knew in my heart I was still both, alright I’ll admit the lithe part needs some work, but my head just didn’t get it.

And Bag Boy knew it too. He has this amazing gift to always say the perfect thing. “My sweet Susanna, your breasts that give and receive pleasure between us as lovers are literally giving life and nurturing the newborn daughters we have created with our love. What could be more beautiful?” If I wasn’t a puddle of mush before, I certainly was now. What did I ever do to deserve such a loving husband? Hormones don’t stand a chance with him around.

**********

Mami and Papi left a week ago and I really miss them, especially Mami. Maybe it’s because she’s had more experience with a large family and all but she was so great with practical advice when it came to feeding the twins.

Noelle and Heidi have completely different nursing styles. Noelle the Impatient got very frustrated waiting for my milk and would be screaming. After trying everything, it was Mami who suggested that I let Heidi the Patient start the process for her sister. So she would begin and once my milk got going, I’d switch her to the other breast and place her impatient sister on the flowing one. The trick worked and now all three of us are in the zone.

I’ve also given the wake-them-every-three-hours-to-feed plan the old heave ho. Starting last week, I let them sleep as long as they wanted, but if one woke up to eat, I woke up and fed the other too. Pretty soon, they were naturally hungry -- and sleepy -- at the same time.

As Gabe so tactfully puts it: “Mommie, time to feed the football sisters.” Then he’ll get this mischievous grin like he knows a secret I don’t.

And if Urs is around he’s no help at all. He just encourages him. “Way to go Gabe. You tell her.” I think I smell a conspiracy here.

**********

We’ve had some very interesting observations from Gabe since Heidi and Noelle have come home. Of course there was the obvious one the first time he saw me change them, but I’ll save that for some other time.

Then we moved up in the world so to speak and came to what else--the breasts. Well he is Bag Boy’s son after all.

"Mommie, your nipples are next to your breasts."

"Yes, that's right."

"I have nipples."

"Yes, you do Gabe."

"I don't have breasts."

“That’s right, Gabe. Boys don’t have breasts like mommies.”

**********

We had a three-day break before Muz and Daddy arrived to see their new granddaughters. I swear one whole suitcase must have been dedicated to clothes and toys for Gabe, Noelle, and Heidi. Muz’s old micromanaging genes must have taken over again. Lucky for us she erred on the large side so they’ll have plenty of things to grow into.

I think she’s a tiny bit intimidated by the twins. Probably a lot of it has to do with experience, after all Gabe was her first grandchild whereas Mami could probably burp and diaper a baby in her sleep she’s been around so many. It’s not that Muz doesn’t cuddle Noelle and Heidi or love them but I don’t know if it’s their size or there’s too many of them for her. She just seems to be more confident interacting with Gabe. I really think she’s more of a toddler type grandmother if you know what I mean. She seems to relate to them more when they’re like a little person.

As I wrote this I realized that’s kind of the way I felt when I taught. Give me a child, any child from age 5-10 and I’m good to go, but from age 11 or 12 on…forget it! For one thing they’re usually taller than me by then and after all those raging hormones start kicking in…no thank you. Yet other teachers would practically run screaming out of the room when confronted by a 6 year old. As I told Urs, “What a blessing for our children that they have loving grandparents with temperaments for all their ages.” (Oops! I hadn’t thought about the terrible teens. I have a feeling we’ll need ALL of them by then for our less than 10 children.)

Jobs by Gabe

Did you know I have football sisters? That’s cuz Mommie holds them under her arms like footballs when they eat. Most times they’re so hungry they don’t even need me to boss them.

I think Papa maybe told everybody ‘bout the football sisters cuz Unca David brought me, Gabe, the big bruver, an ‘merican football and so did Grandpa John. Then Unca Carlos and Unca Seb came with the footballs you kick, not with the pointy ends. I have one, two, three, four footballs.

Grandpa John and Papa and I play kick the football in the back garden. Schatzi tries to plays too ‘cept her mouth can’t open that big so she gets the pointy football.

**********

Grandmami and Grandpapi are gone back to Swissland so now it’s Grandmuz and Grandpa John’s turn. And guess what? Grandmuz knows how to bake cookies too! Papa and I were getting wery worried cuz we ate up all of Grandmami’s cookies. Mommie has been so busy feeding Heidi and Elle and taking naps that she forgot to bake any cookies to feed her cookie monsters. That’s what she calls me and Papa. But now Grandmuz is making us cookies so we can be cookie monsters again.

**********

Every day and every day Papa or Grandpa John and I take Schatzi for walks. I ride my motorcycle ‘cept when Papa jogs we take the jog buggy.



Schatzi’s legs have growed so strong she mostly can keep up now but sumtimes Papa only walks fast so she won’t poop out.

**********

I help Mommie and Papa take care of Elle and Heidi cuz that’s what big bruvers do…jobs. Mommie hugs me and says what a good helper Gabe is and Papa smiles and messes my hair and says I’m ‘sponsible. That means good helper in Papa talk.

We have to brush Schatzi’s hair every day and I brush too, but wery gentle Papa says else it will hurt her. Sumtimes she looks like she needs anuver little brush but when I look for her that silly old Schatzi is gone. I wonder where she goes? I think she might need a little brush right now.

What Next? by Schatzi

I have a new favorite place to hide…I mean relax. It’s the lalala room. My Man goes there most every morning and calls lalala. I don’t know who lalala is but they never come. Sumtimes I even go there when My Man is playing loud screechy guitar…but only if My Boy has The Brush.

Mostly I go there when My Tiny Girls go cry, cry, cry cuz know what? I can hardly hear them when I’m in the lalala room. I think the walls must be wery thick and that’s good for my sensitive doggy ears.

Really I love My Tiny Girls. I didn’t know what they were at first but My Man and My Woman introduced us and I got a good look and smell of each one. Now I’ll know them forever just like my other Peepul. That’s how dogs meet other dogs and peepul too. Did you know that? My Woman calls it ‘bonding’ but in doggy language it’s just plain sniffin’ you out. How come peepul love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Where are their priorities? I am frankly dismayed.

**********

I have been tricked! duped! taken advantage of, just because I’m a poor dumb aminal…well not THAT dumb but they don’t know that. I graduated magma cum puppy from Puppy Kindergarten and ‘cept for that one little Christmas binge I’ve behaved wery well. I really have.

They’ve been planning this all along…Family Dog obedience class. This time with My Man. Now he has taken it into his head to make me sit still and practically beg for every morsel of dinner, which he slowly hand-feeds me. Sit, stay, come, fetch, lie down, shake hands, roll over. I don’t even want to think about what they have planned next for poor little 60-pound Schatzi. I think I need to go have a lie down now in the lalala room and think about what my mama told me. “It’s a dog’s life.”


Buhler Family Blog #14
Jan. 31, 2008


All’s Well by Urs

I knew it was coming but I had no idea it would be so hard. I kept thinking Gabe or Noelle or Heidi would learn some new skill or word or expression and they’d wonder why Papa wasn’t there to see it.

I mean I love the performing; the joy and fulfillment as I stand on stage and feel the flow of energy between the music we make and the audience is such a unique high. It’s just that when I leave now there’s so much more to miss.

**********

Last weekend we sang for a private party, a 60th birthday in Los Angeles so we were gone from Thursday to Sunday. The actual party was Saturday night so we needed an extra day on the front end to check out the venue and get some rest. On Sunday, David flew back with us as far as New York to spend a few days with Sandy. When we arrived back Monday morning I thought the cab would never get through rush hour traffic.

It seemed to take forever before I got the front door opened and my curly-headed boy child launched himself into my arms with a flying hug. “Papa bist du Haus!“ “ Ja ist Papa Haus.” After covering me with puppy dog kisses and choking neck hugs, he wiggled down to grab the handle of my carry-on and headed to the family room off the kitchen to help Papa unpack.

Then my laughing misty-eyed Susanna stepped into my arms with a welcoming hug that sorely tested my stuffing and a kiss definitely not in the Mother Earth category. ‘Steady Urs, one more week. You can do this.’

With Susanna tucked safely under my arm I went to see my little girls. Two sleeping angels, at least for the time being. Suddenly moving arms and legs as I bent to kiss them, then with tiny lip smacks they made faces and settled back to sleep. All was well, Papa was home.

Back in the kitchen Muz was busy setting out enough food to feed three returning Papa’s as Nanny T. tried to make sure Gabe confined his unpacking to the family room. Muz and Nanny must have missed me too because their hugs were wery strong.

Just as Muz was getting that pinch-your-cheeks look in her eye in came John with Schatzi or rather Schatzi with John. As John and I greeted each other I’m sorry to say Schatzi forgot all her training and welcomed me with jumping hugs and kisses. It’s a wonder she didn’t break her tail on the leg of the kitchen table. Can dogs break their tail I wonder? I’ll have to ask at the next class. Then she bounded into the family room to help Gabe finish unpacking my suitcase.
It didn’t take long before Gabe found it. “Papa what’s this?” he asked holding the small box in his chubby hands as Schatzi sniffed and nuzzled hopefully. Discovering it wasn’t edible or a doggy toy she wandered into the kitchen to give a command performance for Muz in her role of poor half-starving dog.

“It’s a souvenir Papa brought you from California. Go on and open it. See you just push the end like this.” I squatted down to his level to help Gabe’s fingers push the end of the matchbox to reveal a small yellow dune buggy.


“Thank you Papa,” Gabe beamed as he squeezed my neck and gave me a big kiss. “Let’s go play cars, please.”

“As soon as we eat breakfast,” I promised. “Papa’s hungry as a horse,” I teased and the game was on.

As he climbed up on my back, the ‘horsey’ began, “Now you know how much Unca Seb likes the beach. Well when we got there guess what we saw? A little blue dune buggy like yours and we…”

**********

When the twins first came home, Houdini and I felt we handled Gabe’s observation about his sisters without their diapers quite well.
“Papa, why are my girl sisters so plain?”
Deep breath, stock answer.
“Because that’s the way God made them, Gabe.”

“But when they get to be mommies they’ll have breasts so they can feed their babies, right Mommie?”

“Yes, Gabe, that’s right.”

No more questions, breathe a sigh of relief…until this week when Gabe was ‘helping Papa’ change Heidi. I’d just settled down on the couch with our beautiful bundle of now sweet-smelling baby girl in one arm and Gabe snuggled under the other when he began.

“I’m glad I’m not plain like my girl sisters Papa. I like being fancy like you cuz we’re boys,” my curly-haired clone with Houdini’s eyes looked up at me with so much love and adoration I thought my heart would stop. All I could manage was to choke out a whispered, “I love you, Gabe,” into his curls as I held him in a hug I wished would last forever.

“Know what else Papa? I know why we’re fancy and Elle and Heidi are plain and Mommie’s have breasts and we have chesties,” he announced as he played with Heidi’s tiny fingers.

By now Houdini and Noelle had joined us. We shared a look…wondering if his answer would be an “Oh yes!” or an “Oh no!” and waiting expectantly.

“So we don’t bump into each uver when we hug.”

Then to test Gabe’s theory the Buhler family joined in a happy, misty-eyed group hug proving they did indeed fit together perfectly.


Old Favorites by Susanna

I’d never admit it to Urs, but I think this trip was harder on him than on Gabe. He’s still fretting about Gabe and his bear blanket. You see Gabe has a sock monkey Muz made for him when he was a baby. He’s been his constant companion around the house. Well then one day he decided Monkey needed a blanket: Gabe’s old teddy bear blanket we wrapped him in when we brought him home from the hospital. So we got it out of the bottom drawer and Gabe and Monkey and ‘Monkey’s’ blanket go everywhere with him now.





I explained to Urs that there’s nothing to worry about. Gabe will give up his blanket when he’s ready. It’s a very common thing to do especially when a new baby comes home and imagine bringing two babies home! His psyche is not permanently damaged, he hasn’t regressed in his potty training, he’s not talking baby talk, he’s just allowing himself a little extra TLC.

**********

I’ve started taking the girls out in their buggy every day for some fresh air and sunshine. They call them prams over here and it is rather more like I’d picture a uniformed nanny pushing in Hyde Park I suppose…well except for the color.

When we picked it out I explained all the practical features to Urs. For instance it has two baby carriers that fit snugly inside; that way you can just unlatch them and carry the baby right into the house from the pram. Then when they outgrow the carriers it becomes a regular pram and finally the front lowers to convert it into a stroller for toddlers.

“And don’t forget Houdini how perfect it will be for those midnight strolls since it glows in the dark. They’ll be able to see us for miles,” he teased trying to wind me up.

“Well babies need visual stimulation, Bag Boy. See it says right here on page 27,” I said, pulling out his favorite baby book. Of course he couldn’t very will refute THE BOOK so he conceded gracefully with a head shake and eye roll.


**********

I’m not sure if you remember, but I’m addicted to not only romance books but also mysteries or will be again I’m sure once our less than 20 children are grown. Anyway we had a little mystery here ourselves the other night after the children were asleep and Urs was packing for LA. The Case of the Missing Cowboy Boots.

What about the red and black or the black and white pony skin or the plain black with the fancy stitching? No, no, and no. This was LA and only the white, blue, red, and yellow boots would do. (and this coming from a man obsessing over his son’s teddy bear blanket? PLEASSSEEEEE)

“Had they accidentally been misplaced after some appearance?”

“Impossible!”

“Were they at the bootmakers being resoled?”

“Of course not!”

“Perhaps they were still in a suitcase waiting to be unpacked?”

“Never!”

“Did you check way in the back corner of the closet, maybe they’ve fallen over?”

“They’re ALWAYS put on boot holders!”

Well we looked and we looked. Muz, Daddy, and even poor Schatzi were interrogated but to no avail. So we left them to search downstairs…again, and we headed upstairs for one last look.

Our room…nothing, the nursery…nothing, guest bedrooms …nothing, Gabe’s room…nothing. Then as we bent down to give him another goodnight kiss the mystery was solved. As we gently peeked under the suspiciously tall mound of covers at the foot of the bed there they were safe and sound. Gabe was wearing Papa’s missing boots from his feet to his knees.

Urs’ red and black boots proved to be the perfect fashion statement as he got off the airplane in Los Angeles.


Monkey Man by Gabe

Mommie says I’m her bestest helper. When Elle and Heidi are full of Mommie’s milk we have to pat and rub them on the back, but wery gently. I think it’s so they won’t ’splode. Mommie says when they suck they eat air and it makes their tummy hurt cuz it’s too full. After we rub them, they cough up air so they feel better. It’s called burping and guess what? Even grown-ups do it cuz once I heard Papa, ’cept no one patted his back. He just said, “Pardon me.”

After they both burp it’s smelly diaper time. Mommie says she’s so glad I wear big boy pants. Me too cuz she bought me some just like Papa but I’ll tell you about that anuver time. Back to the poo poo. Mommie and I do one girl sister and Grandmuz or Nanny T. or even Papa gets to do the uver one. Mostly when Papa’s there I help him cuz he needs me more.

First Mommie takes off the smelly diaper. Yuck! They might be little but they stink big! Then I hand her the wipes, “Only pull one at a time Gabe,” she says. Next I give her a new diaper and she tapes it on. Now Elle smells good again. I think she likes that. So do Mommie and me, ’specially me.

**********

I have a new name, Monkey Man. That’s what Grandpa John calls me. “C’mon Monkey Man let’s go see what we can build in the workshop,” he says. Then we go and pound, pound, pound with our hammers. Grandpa John got some wood just for me, Gabe, and he pounded nails all over it. Now I get to pound just like him with my hammer from Santa.

I’m his big boy helper. We’re building a house for the birds. Then we’ll put it way high in the air on a pole else the birds won’t see it. Grandpa John says I can help him paint it when we’re done. I’ll have to think on what color birds like. Maybe green like a tree. Papa might know.

Know what else? I use the same hand as my Grandpa John, ‘cept not the same one as Mommie and Papa. They said, “Try your other hand, Gabe.”

It’s called the right one but when I did it felt like the wrong one to me. Grandpa John said, “That’s OK. Gabe. You and I use our other right one,” and everybody went ha, ha, ha.

**********

Know why Grandpa John calls me Monkey Man? Cuz Grandmuz got a sock and sewed it into a monkey when I was a tiny baby like Elle and Heidi. Everyday and everyday Monkey likes to go with me. Then one day he told me he needed a blanket cuz he might get cold so I gave him my teddy bear blanket from when I was borned. It makes him feel wery snuggly.

One night when Monkey was sleeping by me with his blanket my brain started to think. Maybe he would like a baby sock monkey. I asked Grandmuz if she could make baby sock monkeys from baby socks and she said yes.

“I need three please Grandmuz,” I told her.

“Three?”

“Yes, Grandmuz, cuz Elle needs one and Heidi needs one and big monkey needs one too.”

She smiled and said, “I think that’s a wonderful idea, Sweetie.”

Sweetie is one of those extra names all Grandmuvers call you mostly when they say yes, no matter where they’re from, even Swissland.

I gave her a wery strong hug and my bestest kiss, not the puppy kind. Then I did my special wink Papa showed me. “I love you Grandmuz.”


New Tricks by Schatzi

Revenge is sweet! I may be going to Family Dog Class but guess what? I’m not the only one being trained around here, no siree bob! I’m training My Peepul. Gott danken, they seem to be fast learners. What? You didn’t know I spoke German too? I already have them trained to keep throwing the ball for me as long as I bring it back to them. Honestly, sometimes My Peepul are just so cute! It's nice having them around.

Speaking of going to dog class, the best part is riding with My Man. Know why? Fresh air. Right now it’s too cold to have the window down enough for me to stick my head out all the way but at least it’s open. I can hardly wait till he rolls it all the way down. Don’t you just love to feel the wind blowing through your ears?

When I ride with My Woman the middle seat is now filled with three car seats. No room for Schatzi. I have to go WAY to the back with the never open windows. Don’t they know how hot I get in my double coat?

When I go to Heaven, will I be allowed to stick my head over the side of my cloud?

Buhler Family Blog #15
Feb. 29, 2008


Good News by Urs

Perfectly planned, an extra day in this shortest of months. I am quickly coming to the conclusion that time is directly proportional to the number of children you have as it seems to go three times as quickly now. We may need to have a rethink about our less than 20 children.

The Buhlers have had several special celebrations lately; not the least of which was the semi-retirement of THE PINK ROBE. Woo Hoo! Lincoln has freed the slaves!

Happily the rest of the guys were also busy being measured for some new suits when I got Susanna’s text: Swiss Lover T shirt tonight! so they missed my reaction because the tailor wouldn’t have needed to ask. As luck would have it he was measuring my sleeve length and not my inseam. I just must live right!

Muz and John were in Paris visiting Andrew and Isabel and their new six month old daugher Cristina. Even the children must have subconsciously agreed to cooperate because they went down without a peep and only one story for Gabe.

In Houdini’s romance books you might read some banality such as ‘coming home’ or ‘deepest satisfaction’ or ‘earthshaking’ but that’s not really it. As we loved each other it was the ending punctuation of a wondrous sentence, written over the last ten months, the first word capitalized by pulling two toy bunnies from a hat and ending with an exclamation of our love. (Not to be bragging but I checked and ackshully Houdini thought it deserved at least two exclamations.)

**********
Noelle and Heidi seem to change every day; sometimes too quickly I think. It’s really quite different than when Gabe was born. Because he was our firstborn we always seemed to be in a hurry for him to get to the next new stage of growth, to do the next ‘cute’ thing and of course to us as new parents everything was cute. Well except for a few times he thought I was a flower and needed sprinkling. With the girls we’re enjoying and appreciating each stage more.

**********

Our house was bursting at the seams for the girls’ Baptism on the 10th. Fritz and Dar had been Gabe’s godparents so this time it was Andrew and Petra for Noelle and Ingrid and Hans for Heidi. Elke and Franz had announced their engagement at Christmas and plan on a June wedding so I kinda promised them they’d be next. Houdini promptly restated the rule about every household member being completely potty trained first so I guess they have a while…make that quite a while. (Pardon me while I remove Susanna’s elbow from my ribs.)

Father Mike was in rare form, officiating at the church and charming everyone back at the house afterward.

“Sure ‘tis I thought poor Urs’d be wearing nought but a stem for his boutonnière by the time he got to the altar.”

“Now let me tell ya Gabriel me boy about Gaelic football…and don’t ya know me nephew’s oldest boy didn’t he play in the 2004 inter-county All-Ireland Football Final in Croke Park.”

Poor Father Mike may never be the same after his demonstration in the back garden. There was Gabe, Willem and his boys, Luca 7 and Jakob 9, Andrew, Hans, Fritz, myself and of course Schatzi. By the time we were called in for dinner it had deteriorated into a running, chasing, squealing, tickling game with kicking or throwing the ball purely incidental. All that was missing was Father Ludwig. In order to be fair I guess we should have him do the next one.


Isn’t It Romantic? by Susanna

I am not sure I want to be around when Noelle and Heidi discover boys because Urs will probably not let them date before age 30. You should have seen him on ‘T shirt night’, oops, just speaking figuratively here, sorry that’s for my eyes only. Anyway we had to take the baby monitor and go to one of the guest rooms.

“Susanna not in front of the girls!”

Hmmm. I’m wondering now if that’s why he had handicapped benches put in all the guest bathrooms.
He leaves for Sweden the 1st of March and I guarantee Noelle and Heidi will be sleeping peacefully in their nursery when he returns.

I think our evening was even more special because of the anticipation that had time to build up all day.

“You’ve passed with flying colors, young lady. I’ll see you again next year, ja?” Dr. Ziegler looked up from my chart as we sat in his office after my exam.

“Ja, next year but only for my annual check-up,” I replied. “We’ve given you enough business for awhile. Don’t get greedy,” I teased.

As soon as I got out of the office I sent Urs a text and got back a great big, “Yes!!!!!” with flying kisses a few minutes later. The rest of the day was punctuated by teasing phone messages, deciding what to cook for supper, planning what to wear, finally making peace with my belly button never looking quite the same again, worrying about getting the children to sleep, and daydreams…lots and lots of daydreams especially after the huge bouquet of roses arrived.

**********

The girls are sleeping almost through the night now and Urs can finally help. He’d been going on and on about when could he feed them. He loved being able to give Gabe the occasional feed so last week I started trying a supplemental bottle with Noelle and Heidi.

Noelle seemed to accept it with no problems but I think that’s because she has more of Urs’ temperament: let’s get down to business, stay on task, no messing about. Heidi tends to be more like me: lay back, enjoy the ride, stop and smell the roses. She thought the breast was just fine thank you very much. She wasn’t in any hurry, so why change? She will take the occasional bottle but she still prefers to take the scenic route as Urs likes to say. That’s fine I say with a smile and a teasing observation on Noelle and her Papa’s need for instant gratification.

**********

We’re still doing one parent, one language with Gabe and now when Urs feeds Heidi and Noelle he keeps up a constant conversation with them too, singing lullabies, crooning softly and of course smiling, so wide on occasion it almost reaches his sideburns. He’s even made CD’s for Gabe and the girls especially for when he’s away.

He made the fatal mistake of asking Gabe what songs he wanted Papa to sing for him so he has no one to blame but himself when Gabe requested “Tinkle, Tinkle” and “Fuzzy Wuzzy”. He did add “Hansel und Gretel”, “Roti Rosli” and Brahm’s Lullaby “Guten Abend, gute Nacht”.

**********

Both our girls were very well behaved at their Baptisms. Heidi barely woke up and Noelle made a few bad faces and fussed only one time. Grandpapi and Grandpa John tried to see who could take the most pictures and left the fussing and smoothing of blankets and dresses to their highly competent wives.

I still remember the emergency change we did with Gabe after he decided to fill his diaper just as we were going into the church for his Baptism and as I looked at Urs standing there holding Gabe I knew he was remembering too.

**********

Between Fritz’s two daughters Lara 13, and Anna 11, we didn’t need to worry about the children lacking supervision back at the house. Even Ingrid and Han’s girl Leonie helped and she’s just 8. I was so tickled watching Father Mike work his magic on all of them. You can tell he comes from a large family. He certainly knows how to enchant them no matter what the age. I could almost see him calculating if he’d be retired by the time Gabe and the twins are ready to be married.

**********

The day after the Baptism we had a very brave lady join the Buhler family, Mrs. Paul our housekeeper. Bless her soul she must have thought we were running a bed and breakfast since both sets of parents and Petra, Willem, Luca, and Jakob were still with us. As soon as she arrived she had her trial by fire in the kitchen helping with breakfast.

When she came back on Wednesday she almost looked a bit disappointed all our guests had gone. That’s probably just as well since Buhler family gatherings are never small.

Urs is already addicted to her omelets and I’m expecting him to ask for chocolate chip pancakes any day now. That man is incorrigable!

She’ll be here three days a week to start but will add more days later when Schatzi starts her spring shed and the girls get more mobile. Let’s hope Noelle and Heidi aren’t to the ‘petting the nice doggy’ stage by then for everyone’s sake, most of all Schatzi’s.

**********

Urs and I haven’t really been out much since the twins were born, so for Valentine’s Day he planned a special surprise, besides the red roses. He asked Nanny T. to stay the night so we could go out. I’d made up bottles for their late night feed and fed them just before we left. All he would tell me was we were going out for dinner.

It felt like playing grown-up on a first date as I was getting ready. I must admit I had to practice a little in my high heels but I looked pretty good. Your favorite red dress and I thank you Urs for converting the small spare room into a gym. I couldn’t have done it without you.

“Mommie you look pretty,” Gabe said gently fingering my pearl drop earrings as I hugged him goodnight.

“Thank you sweetheart,” I replied, dropping a kiss in his soft, dark curls.

Not wanting to forget Papa, yet struggling to find the word he wanted he settled for, “Papa you look pretty too,” as Urs laughed and swung him up for one last airplane ride and a goodnight hug and kiss.

I can see I’m going to have to add drop-dead handsome to Gabe’s vocabulary.

**********

The evening was absolutely perfect. Even riding in the roadster without any childrens’ car seats felt romantic to me. When we arrived at the Berkeley where he’d first met Dar and Bob for drinks in the Blue Bar I was so thrilled that he’d remembered. Then after a sumptuous dinner he suggested we skip dessert for now but instead of leaving the hotel, do you know what that wonderful, romantic, silly-nosed wombat did? He steered me toward the elevator and up to the suite he’d booked. Now how much better can it get?



Well how about champagne, chocolate covered strawberries, my favorite truffles from Geneva, and of course the best Valentine in the world, my loving husband.

We agreed we’d only call home once so I checked with Nanny T. while Urs was opening the champagne and everything was fine.

Our romantic evening was magical. Bag Boy was magical. Houdini, that’s me, was magical. Together Bag Boy and Houdini were magical. We were home by one. Did I mention our evening was magical?


Fullby Gabe

Know what? Papa and Nanny T. can feed my two girl sisters and even me sometime Mommie said…maybe. She put her milk in little bottles so Elle and Heidi can fill up when Mommie and her breasts are gone.

**********

Know what else? Our house was filled up with Grandmami and Grandpapi and my aunties and uncas and cuzins from Swissland and Grandmuz and Grandpa John from ‘merica. My cuzins got to sleep in bags on the floor ‘cept Mommie said I had to stay in my bed.
Elle and Heidi wore big white dresses and we got dressed up too ‘cept not like them. Faver Mike was at church.

I said, “Hi, Faver Mike,” and he did a little wave.

Papa said, “No talking, Gabriel Christian,” so I didn’t any more.

Auntie Ingrid and Auntie Petra held Heidi and Elle. Papa held me so I could be tall. Then Faver Mike washed their heads and I think the water was cold. Elle said cry, cry, cry but then she was OK. Heidi didn’t hardly wake up just like Mommie when she’s tired. Then everybody came to our house, even Faver Mike.

All the boys ‘cept Grandpa John and Grandpapi played I-wish football. Faver Mike showed us ‘cept Schatzi didn’t know which team she was on. I was on Papa’s team. We’re the bestest! Then we played chase and run and fall down and tickle till it was time for food. Faver Mike waited for me to say my part, “and bless the cook.”

**********

Now everyone’s back in Swissland and ‘merica ‘cept we have a new person at our house now every day and every day…but not some days. It is Mrs. Paw. She poofs the pillows and cleans the sink when Papa and I do a mess shaving. She even put my new sock monkey sheets on my bed. Yes, I have monkey man sheets AND three baby sock monkeys Grandmuz brought me. I am wery happy. I gave Elle and Heidi a baby sock monkey. Now they are wery happy too.

**********

One night Mommie and Papa went out and Nanny T. got to have a sleepover. That’s what my Swissland cuzins call it when you sleep at anuver person’s house. Mommie and Papa looked wery pretty and they smelled good too. Nanny T. and I were the bosses and stayed with Schatzi and Elle and Heidi so they wouldn’t be alone.

Well, after I was asleep my brain told me to wake up to go potty and I did and I heard the phone.

I asked, “Who is that?”

“It’s Mommie,” said Nanny T.

While Nanny T. was tucking me in, the phone did it again. This time it was Papa. I got to talk to him but we had to talk soft cuz he was whispering. I asked him where he was and he said the bathroom. What a funny Papa!

**********

Did you know any place could be a time-out chair? Why didn’t someone tell me? Yesterday I was getting ready to shave with Papa when he bended over the sink and I saw them. He had on his red big boy pants.

Quick as a froggy I hopped off my stool and unzipped my cheans, wery slow like Papa said. I ran to my drawer to get my big boy pants so I could be just like Papa. Oh No! Where are they? I had to put all my big boy pants on the floor to see if they were hiding… but no red ones. I could feel a tizzy coming on right then. I went stomp, stomp, stomp, cry, cry, cry. Then Papa came and sent me to ‘stralia. You know where? On the lid of the big potty!

Pretty soon Mommie came to see why I was tizzying. I couldn’t tell her cuz ‘stralia’s kinda like church…no talking or you hafta start all over. So Papa told her I couldn’t find my red big boy pants. Guess what? My Mommie found more red big boy pants, “for ‘mergencies” she said, “’cept you can’t put them on till Papa says your time is up.” My head told her yes.

When it was time to get out of ‘stralia I put on my ‘mergency red big boy pants and my cheans just like Papa, ‘cept his have just buttons.

“Gabriel do you know how magical your Mommie is?”

“Yes Papa, she’s wery magical.”



Let’s Party by Schatzi

I never really thought of myself as a party animal but maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks…well I’m not really that old yet even in dog years. All I can say is when My Family throws a party they throw a party!

Lots of people to pet you, especially Faver Mike. OOOHHH he hits that extra itchy spot behind my left ear every time. Heavenly! Then there’s all that outdoor fun, I mean the kind with people, not where they open the door and send you out to play by yourself. I mean what fun is that? Give me something to fetch, a ball to chase, someone to chase me and I’ll be your friend for life. Finally it’s time to eat. What a spread and with all those Little People dropping food either accidentally or on purpose you just gotta love ‘em. I have yet to meet a morsel that falls to the floor without ‘Schatzi’ written all over it.

And speaking of morsels, that brings me to one of my pet peeves. Imagine that a pet with a peeve…but I digress.

Here it is:

When my family sits down to dinner, especially big ones, they always bless their food (and the cook). But they never bless my dinner for some reason. I have the feeling I'm missing something here. So, I've been wagging my tail extra fast when they pour out my food, as my own blessing. No one seems to notice.

Buhler Family Blog #16
March 26, 2008


You’ll Never Roam Alone by Urs

I’d almost finished packing for my trip to Sweden when Gabe wandered in, scrambled up onto the bed and sat Indian style watching…and waiting. I tucked a pair of socks into a corner and swung him up into my arms and to the floor. Holding hands I led him to my closet.

“Hmmm. Which ones should I take?” I put on my serious face and held my chin as I looked at the pairs of boots, then picked the black ones and put them beside the bed.

“Your turn, Gabe.”

I quickly had to move my hand from my jaw to cover my grin as Gabe’s little hand came to his chin, copying me exactly even to the murmured, “Hmmm.”

“I think I’ll take these,” he decided, picking up the pony skin boots.

“Good choice,” I agreed as I ruffled his hair and got back to my packing as Gabe and his boots scurried back to his room.

Another of the Buhler traditions had been born.

**********

I was sitting on the bed pulling on my boots the morning after my last trip when Gabe came in carrying the red, white, yellow, and blue boots he’d slept in.

“Here, Papa, for you.”

“Thank you Gabe. Are you finished playing with them?”

With hands on hips forming miniature bat wings, he explained to his seemingly dense Papa. “I was not PLAYING, Papa. I had to take care of Mommie and the girls. That’s what BIG boys like me Gabe do, ‘member? When you were gone I was the only boy left.”

Looking suitable chastised, I blinked back tears, “Of course, Gabe, what a silly Papa I am. What would I have done without you to look after our girls? Thank you for taking care of them for me.”

I opened my arms and he clambered up onto my lap to give me a juicy kiss and an extra tight hug.

“And be the boss of them sometimes too, right Papa?” he asked as he looked hopefully up into my eyes.

“Yes, and sometimes that too, Gabe…if they let us.”

**********

I’d forgotten just how cold March can be in Stockholm but in a way that was a good thing since we didn’t feel like we were missing anything with the long hours spent in the studio. After the first week we were farther along that we thought so with Per and David’s permission we started our weekend a little early at noon on Friday.

Poor Carlos insisted he would never thaw unless he captured some Spanish sunlight but since we already knew from Susanna that Gavina was home on a break we teased him unmercifully. I think I ackshully saw a blush.

Seb decided to stay around, catch up on sleep and check out the local music scene later. David agreed to tag along if he was still able to move after some cross-country skiing I’d talked him into.

I had a sightseeing weekend planned with a special surprise for a certain curly-haired boy. So wearing many layers of clothes with several roomy pockets, one small overnight bag, phone, and sunglasses I caught an afternoon flight to Bergen, Norway with a stopover in Oslo.

The next morning a new friend and I took an express boat from the city center. Our plan was to cruise Sognefjord, the world’s longest fjord stretching more than 120 miles inland. On the trip up the fjord we stopped at several villages to look around and stretch our legs. While our guide pointed out the mountain farms perched high above we both agreed that here where this deep fjord meets the glaciers and Norway’s highest mountains is one of the world's most beautiful travel destinations.

**********

I finally got paid back for teasing Gabe about being the boss and it’s all Schatzi’s fault. I mean I couldn’t help it and I offered to stay with the children, but no, Houdini insisted it was my responsibility. I can still here her in a wery unmagical voice, “Just pull your big boy pants up and do it.” Well with Gabe looking on I couldn’t wery well turn down a chance to be the boss. I have a nagging feeling Gabe has already filed ‘pulling up your big boy pants’ in his vocabulary for later use.

**********

I can understand how Susanna loves seeing Father Mike but I know she loves visiting Buckden Towers on the church grounds almost as much. She’s told me so often about how Henry VIII kept Catherine there for a time but was disappointed she’d not become ill from the damp weather so she was moved further north toward the Fens to Kimbolton Castle, her final residence. Deep down I think Houdini would love to have been a medieval or Tudor lady…with modern plumbing of course.



So it was no wonder Father Mike had little trouble charming us into spending Easter with him. I was a bit leery about having all the children with us since Gabe usually goes to our church nursery during Mass. I reminded him he couldn’t say hi to Father Mike like he did at the twins’ Baptism so he was content to just wave.

I was so proud of my family. Gabe looked wery grown up with his shirt and tie and my girls were little matching angels, but in different colors. I don’t know how she does it, but somehow Houdini’s ‘magic’ bag has room for whatever she needs to keep them looking neat and clean no matter what.

There were a few times Gabe forgot to use his “whisper” voice as Mommie calls it but mostly when we were singing, thank Gott. Susanna had extra bottles ready just in case but Heidi and Noelle were good as gold. Father Mike did wind me up later though about them sleeping through his sermon.

Afterward they had organized an Easter egg hunt on the church grounds. It took Gabe a little while to realize after he found them he was supposed to put them in his basket but he managed to collect three.

Father Mike and I had a couple games of darts while Gabe ‘helped’ Mrs. Murray, his housekeeper, fix Father’s beloved potatoes and Susanna fed the twins. As always the dinner was delicious and our compliments received the usual reply. “Well and now why wouldn’t it be Urs me boy? We’ve got potatoes.”



Rolling Right Along by Susanna

On his next trip I have a feeling Urs will make me promise to send videos every day. Well the girls and I did have some surprises up our sleeve but then so did Urs and Gabe and even Schatzi.

As planned, Noelle and Heidi are now sleeping in the nursery. I had been using the big chair all along for some feedings so they were used to their new surroundings.



Now getting the two ‘footballs’ feeding by myself proved to be a little tricky at first but it’s getting better and to have them sleep 6-7 hours at night is HEAVEN!

Gabe was the first one to notice the mini push-ups when I’d put them on their tummies for playtime.

“Look Mommie, Heidi’s doing her exercises just like Papa!”

Then a few days later he came tearing through the house shouting, “Elle rolled over just like Schatzi!”

So now the fun has started. I can see Gabe now trying to teach his sisters new tricks. I’d better hide the doggy treats.

**********

Each night when Urs would call, Gabe would get on and give Papa a report on everyone in Swgengabe, (Swiss German+English+Gabe). He’d hold the phone in one hand and use his other to help him talk. Then when he was done, I’d get on and Urs and I would compare Gabe’s news, often with hilarious results. One thing neither Urs or Gabe would explain though was Papa’s new friend.

“It’s just a guy I met here in Stockholm,” was Urs’ only comment and Gabe would just giggle.

Then Urs called on Saturday afternoon. I should have guessed something was up because he usually calls just before Gabe goes to bed.

“Mommie, Papa says he’s sending you a picture of his new friend. Hurry Mommie!” Gabe the Kangaroo clapped and hopped up and down as I pushed the keys.



“Why you tricky monkey man!” I laughed as I hugged him. “You sure fooled Mommie.”

“And Papa too,” grinned Gabe with a blinky wink.

Oh my, I think you’re getting too good at that Gabe. Wait till I get a hold of your father.

**********

As happens more often than not, if your husband is away schiesse is bound to hit the fan. So while Urs was gone our little furry girl had grown into puberty. As Gabe so ably informed him, “Schatzi is all heated up, Papa.”

Urs’ Monday morning run with her was fine. Then Tuesday it was almost lunchtime when a winded, stormy faced Urs and a rather muddy, head hanging Schatzi reappeared…not a good sign.

Urs grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, opened it, flung himself into the nearest chair and drank thirstily. Schatzi drained her water bowl then plopped down with a sigh in the corner and tried to appear invisible, not an easy feat for any 65 lb. animal.

“You and Schatzi had a wery long run, Papa,” Gabe commented as he wandered into the kitchen tableau.

“Well, Schatzi,” Urs glanced over at her in dismay, “was a bad girl. She wiggled out of her collar and ran off to,” Urs swallowed hard, “to play with some other dogs.” His eyes pleaded ‘help me out here’ so I took pity on him.

“Did you see her playing with any other dogs…big dogs?” After all let’s look at the logistics here.

“No, when I found her,” again he glanced over at his wayward animal daughter now in a state of disgrace, “she was being chased by a small terrier but she was gone more than half an hour. I must have run three miles all over the park looking for her.”

That’s when I informed him he needed to take her to the vet right now for a shot ‘just in case’. It’s a good thing he still had on his running shoes because he really dug his heels in but with Gabe there what could he do? Besides I was taking Gabe with me to Juli’s this afternoon to help her plan Amelie’s upcoming birthday.

By the time we got back, Schatzi was confined to Australia in the kitchen, a brochure about the injection lay on the table, and even the closed door to the music room could not contain the sound of Urs’ guitar. Gabe and I wisely retreated upstairs to check on the probably hungry sisters and have some quiet time ourselves.

**********

I had Mrs. Murray take a picture of Father Mike and us before we sat down to eat on Easter.

I close my eyes and I’m a little girl again going shopping for my Easter outfit, patent leather shoes and a new dress.
Muz would wear a corsage. I would look at Daddy and think he was the handsomest Daddy in the world in his suit with his handkerchief folded just so and his shoes all shiny. We would stand near the hedge in the courtyard of our big apartment building in Chicago and take pictures: Muz and I, Daddy and I, then all three if a neighbor happened by.

And so the tradition continues with our little family.



Tricky Me by Gabe


Just call me Tricky. I put baby sock monkey in Papa’s suitcase and he never knew. Baby sock monkey hided inside Papa’s shoe all the way to Sweedland. When Papa took out his shoe there he was. I told Papa now he had a sock monkey friend just like Gabe, his big boy, so he won’t be lonely. Papa said it was a wery good surprise. Us boys even tricked Mommie cuz she didn’t know. Then Papa sent a picture where he took sock monkey on vacation. Papa said he named his sock monkey Sogne cuz that was where he had his picture took.

**********

Schatzi got in bad trouble. She ‘scaped when Papa took her to run. When he finally catched her she was heating up the other dogs so Papa had to take her to the vet. He gave her a shot to cool her off. Papa says we have to watch her careful so she doesn’t heat up any more dogs.

Then you know what that silly Schatzi did? She stoled Papa’s black socks when Mommie was folding them and she won’t give them back. Mommie says she thinks they’re her baby puppies cuz she puts them by her tummy when she lays down.

I told Papa now we have sock monkeys and sock baby puppies. He just did funny rolly eyes ‘cept he wasn’t smiling.
I think he wants his socks back.

**********

Elle and Heidi are sleeping in their own room now ‘cept not in big boy beds like me. They learned a new trick to roll over when Papa was gone. One day Mommie put them on their tummies to play and all a sudden Heidi flipped right over. Then Elle copied her ‘cept they can’t flip back yet. Papa calls them the turtle sisters cuz that’s what turtles do. I just call them the roly poly sisters cuz I like saying it.

**********

Mommie and I colored the eggs for our Easter baskets, even for Elle and Heidi but not Schatzi. Then the Easter bunny came and gave us chocolate eggs and jelly beans. I gave Mommie all the black ones cuz she likes them best. Papa kept telling her to eat the green ones so she did and then she made him eat some. Then they did a big juicy kiss ‘cept they didn’t see me there. I could only eat one, two, three jelly beans and then it was time to go see Faver Mike.

I tried to be wery good in church and Faver Mike said I was and then he ruffled my hair. He likes to do that everytime. Then we hunted for the lost Easter eggs and I forgot to put them in my basket ‘cept then I ‘membered. Mrs. Murray let me smash the potatoes with the smasher. I’m going to tell Mommie to get one. When Mrs. Murray took our pictures Mommie said, “NO winks, Gabriel, just smile nice.” Gabriel is ‘most as bad as Gabriel Christian so I just smiled nice.



Almost by Schatzi

Woe is me. My mother never said there’d be days like this. I mean she did sit me down and tell me about the puppies and the dogs. I guess she just forgot to tell me the go-to-the-vet-and-get-a-shot-in-the-rear-FOR-NOTHING part.

I just knew it was time for me to go on a date but do you think My Man would understand? Sure it’s fine and dandy for him to go around making babies left, right and center but can poor lonely Schatzi even go on a date? NO! What a spoiled sport. Just wait till I’m allowed upstairs. I’ll go bounding up onto the bed and interrupt him and see how he likes it!

And the worst part, the absolute worst part is I didn’t even DO anything. Sure a few interesting, make that wery interesting sniffs, some wishful thinking, but that’s all, honest. Yet here I’m dragged home in disgrace and have to go get a shot and now I’m feeling all broody and with my luck my sock babies will have holes in them.

Poor Schatzi, always the bridesmaid, never the bride.

Buhler Family Blog #17
May 31, 2008


Things to Celebrate by Urs

On March 29th Mademoiselle Amelie Izambard celebrated her second birthday and declared herself an official member of the Terrible Twos. Fortunately her tizzy was well timed, occurring near the end of the party.

Ackshully I’d say it was a great party even though poor Juli was so embarrassed and Seb was the hero of the day thanks to my magical Susanna. Juli had only invited four other children from Gabe and Amelie’s playgroup and their parents of course. Seb was in his element playing chef on the outdoor grill. Noelle and Heidi had more attention than they knew what to do with and zonked out right after their bottles.

We fed the children first and then while the adults ate and visited, the children were happy to just play and run around. Carlos had sent a piñata filled with little rubber balls, little cars, and other durable trinket toys. It opened with a string, not the kind you bash. Juli had given the children gift bags to collect the toys. Gabe was definitely up for this having learned his lesson with the Easter eggs.

Juli had asked for no gifts but of course we all brought some little token for Amelie to open. Susanna had picked out several books for her and it was obvious that Sandy had done David’s shopping. I’ve never seen a dress with so many tiny ruffles. I hope Susanna doesn’t plan on dressing the girls like that, at least not all the time.

I’m not sure if Chloe was trying to speed things along and get to the cake part or what but clearly Amelie felt Chloe’s help in opening her gifts was neither wanted nor appreciated. That’s when the tizzy started. Her displeasure quickly escalated into a tizzying tug of war in which Chloe and the gift were sent to neutral corners and Amelie was dispatched into the house to the awaiting time out chair.

Once Seb realized the tizzying devil child dressed in his angel’s pastel ruffled and smocked handmade dress from Maman and Amelie were indeed the same person he sprang into action. Ackshully sprang might be giving him too much credit.

Susanna whispered, “Tell Seb to get his guitar,” while she gathered the children. “Let’s play Ring Around the Rosey!” By the time he’d returned Susanna and the children were dizzily laughing and enjoying the ‘all fall down’ part even without the song.

He pulled up a chair and began playing and singing for probably his youngest audience ever. He opened with ‘Frere Jacques’ as the adults joined in the round. Then it was request time: Baa Baa Black Sheep, Pop Goes the Weasel, and Three Blind Mice. About the time the farmer’s wife cut off their tails Seb’s sweet-tempered angel reappeared and quietly sat down to listen to Papa. A few songs later, Juli announced, “Time for the cake!”

Too bad Schatzi wasn’t there to tidy up the crumbs and ice cream spills, especially since both the cake and ice cream were in a dog-friendly flavor, vanilla. Almost all the parents had a funny story to tell about a previous birthday as they attempted to wipe off their offspring with mixed success. I’m not sure about the children but I know several adults who slept well that night. It must have been all that fresh air.

**********

The turtle girls have now figured out how to turn over both ways and have started rocking on their stomachs and kicking their arms and legs. I keep telling Susanna it must be something in the cereal she’s feeding them. On second thought it can’t be that because they’re still at the stage where the they push out more cereal than ever reaches their tummies. She just smiles and teases me about forgetting when Gabe did the same thing.

Both of the girls take after their mother, real babblers but you didn’t hear that from me. Noelle seems to be the squealer while Heidi just sort of chuckles and grins. They really like being in their playpen so they can see what everyone else is doing and I know they recognize different voices, at least Papa’s.

**********

Everything goes in their mouth now and they’ve even had rashes on their chins from drooling. Their little searching mouths are always looking for something to chomp on. Gabe and I do a daily tooth check but none so far.

It took all my will power not to laugh the other night when Gabe came crying to me after he’d gotten his finger too close to Heidi’s mouth. “Papa, Heidi tried to eat me!” Now when he’s around them he makes sure they have something to chew on besides Gabe.

**********

I surprised Houdini the other morning with breakfast in bed…me, only kidding, well kinda. What ackshully happened was we only needed the morning in the studio so I came home and helped Nanny T. feed the girls. Then she and I had a wonderful idea for her to take Gabe to the park for lunch and then go grocery shopping. That left Houdini and I with the house to ourselves, except for the sleeping twins of course, and here Houdini thought she was the only magical one!

**********

Speaking of Houdini, you remember when I thought it would be a good idea to get a dog and she wasn’t too keen on it? Well it seems my magical wife has changed her mind and teamed up with Schatzi aka ‘Little Miss Hot Stuff’.

Now Houdini thinks it would be a good thing if we let her have one litter and then have her spayed. Why, you may ask? Our children need to have the awesome experience of seeing a live birth. Can’t they wait till they have their own children? That’s soon enough for me. With the questions Gabe asks already I’d better start using an electric razor and who knows what kind of questions Noelle and Heidi will come up with, after all, they are girls.

Plus this blessed event wouldn’t take place until the twins are two, “So they can appreciate it”. No, absolutely not! I am putting my foot down…and if that doesn’t work I refuse to take her for any more ‘just in case’ shots. Do they make chastity belts for dogs?



R & R by Susanna

It took a lot of convincing to get Juli to give up the clowns, face painting, and balloon animals but I’m so glad she ‘decided’ to keep it simple. As I told her, “Save that until she’s 5 or so and understands birthday parties. At this age they just want to play.”

I know this wasn’t Amelie’s first tizzy but I don’t think Seb had seen a full-blown one before or at least not in front of company. It was a shock but he recovered quickly and Juli handled it very well. It’s amazing how a little distraction and redirection can save the day.

**********

I’ll bet in another month the twins will be starting to crawl. God help us all! At least we’ll have a lot of built in babysitters since we’ll be in Switzerland the end of June for Elke and Franz’ wedding. Let’s just hope their bottom teeth are in by then.

Thinking back to when Gabe was teething it didn’t seem as bad as the girls but I guess it’s just because everything is doubled now. I have found a couple of things to help though. One is this great teething blanket with soft plastic at the corners. They even chew on just the blanket. I bought several and just throw them in the wash.



Ever since Gabe’s run-in with Heidi making sure they both have their teething blanket seems to be his mission in life. I could just thump Urs though for his silly teasing. Why did he have to go and call her ‘Jaws”? Now Heidi has become Jaws 1 and Noelle is Jaws 2. I know he’s just paying me back for calling them Urslettes before they were born.

Then I found the absolutely neatest thing that the twins love to chew on. It’s a mesh feeder bag. It looks kind of like a mesh Popsicle with a plastic handle. You put chunks of frozen fruit or vegetables or even crushed ice in it and they chew on it through the bag. One day I got creative and made breast milk ice cubes. Boy was that a hit!



Before I found these we’d tried cold washcloths and plastic shapes you put in the freezer or fridge and, of course our clean fingers, but there were a few bad nights. Urs was great about taking his turn but I tried to be the one to get up most of the time since his schedule could change with a phone call and he needed to be fresh.

I remember one night I’d just fed the girls and was getting back to bed for the third time when he was getting up. The next thing I knew he was waking me with coffee and juice and it was almost noon.

“The girls?” I hadn’t heard a thing since my head hit the pillow.

“Nanny T. and I just fed them and they’re just about asleep,” he grinned smugly.

“Gabe?” Surely I hadn’t slept through my morning kiss.

“Going grocery shopping with Nanny T. I think she said something about eating lunch at the park first,” he announced, looking very pleased with himself.

“I thought you were at the studio all day.” I know he said something about work today.

“We finished early and I begged off eating lunch with the guys. I’m feeling a little…handicapped at the moment,” he purred as he prowled over to the door and turned the lock.

“Um…I can tell Bag Boy,” I giggled as I threw the covers off and reached for the hem of my nightie. “First one there gets the handicapped bench.”

I don’t know how long we’d been sleeping when we heard a knock on the door. “Mommie, Papa, time to get up. Elle and Heidi are hungry. You had a wery long nap, longer than me.”

**********

Urs and I have been discussing the possibility of Schatzi having one litter before we have her spayed. Frankly I think Urs just doesn’t want to deal with the questions from the children. I mean we don’t need to give them the Kinsey report for gosh sakes, just what they need to know at their level. He really did well coming up with chesties. I’m sure he’ll be just fine when the time comes to answer their questions, well at least Gabe’s, I hope.

She’ll only be in heat about two more times. How bad is that? Don’t answer. I can see I’ll have to make sure her collar is on tight. Too bad she’s so huge or else I could put a pair of Urs’ boxer briefs on her.


Lots of Growing Up by Gabe

Am-ee is two years old like me now. I went to her birfday party and my friends in my playgroup, too. There was Emma and Chloe, they’re girls, and Jack and Ian, they’re boys.

Unca Seb cooked hamburgs and wursts on the grill. We ate on the blanket on the grass and it was OK if you spilled. I liked that…Schatzi would too.

Unca Carlos gave Am-ee a pin-ya-ta. Pin-ya-ta...I like saying that. Auntie Juli pulled the plug and all the toys fell out. This time I knowed to fill up my bag. I found a little green truck and some mungie rubber balls and rubber cow and a horse and crayons.

Know what? Am-ee had a birfday tizzy ‘cept she disappeared wery fast cuz I think her mommie took her to ‘stralia in the house. We played ‘Ring Around and All Fall Down’ and then Unca Seb played his guitar. We were the bosses cuz he played whatever we said even if he didn’t know the song. I liked that. Sumtimes Papa plays his guitar but mostly not songs I know. That’s when Schatzi and I like to play outside.

A few little minutes later Am-ee was done tizzying and it was time for the cake and blow out the candles…one, two candles, same as me. Am-ee did it good. Chloe stayed far away. Poor Schatzi wasn’t invited so I saved sum cake for her in my pocket. She was wery surprised.

**********

My turtle sisters have learned how to swim on their tummies and Schatzi taught them how to drool. Mommie says that’s cuz they’re getting ready for teeth but Papa and I checked. “See Gabe, they’re still the turtle sisters, just like a turtle, no teeth.”

**********

Know what? Sometimes Nanny T. needs me to help here pick out the groceries. One time Papa came home early. He wondered to Nanny T. if it would it be a nice day for us to eat at the park and maybe was I big enough to help her go shopping.

Nanny T. said she just knew I would be a good shopper so she took me. I was a wery good helper and said, “Yes, Nanny T” and “Please, Nanny T”. When we came home I had to be wery quiet cuz Mommie and Papa were taking a nap and we couldn’t baver them. They even shut the door so they could take a nap better. When I got up from my nap, Nanny T. said I could go knock, knock, knock and wake them up.


The Women Take Care of Their Own by Schatzi

Cake, yes, ooh I love cake. My Boy didn’t forget his big furry friend, not like certain other Peepul in this house. Best of all he’d turned his pocket inside out and I was almost finished before the food police arrived. By then they were too busy going ha, ha, ha. My Woman even took my picture. I know you’re supposed to smile for the camera but I was a little busy.

When it’s your birthday Gabe can I be the designated eater?

**********

My Tiny Girls are no longer tiny and I’m also proud to say they are part Newfie. No you silly wombats, they don’t have webbed feet, they drool. (BTW in case you were wondering, wombat is not a doggie ‘stralia word for me.) Now I won’t be the only one they chase around the house wanting to wipe their mouth. Yuck! Oops I’d better not complain or they might put one of those drool catcher towels around my neck too.

**********

I overheard, well really it wasn’t overhearing, we dogs have keen senses; we can’t help it. Anyway maybe it’s the postparty hormones or something like that but My Woman wants me to date, get married even, and my husband would have a pedigree. Oh happy day, Schatzi is going to be a bride!

My Man, the thinker, of course said, “We need to make a realistic decision here.” That’s Swiss for, “When the Matterhorn melts.”

I’m betting my Poochie Chew Dog Treats on My Woman and in case anyone cares to ask my opinion: I’d rather have too much too soon than too little too late.

Buhler Family Blog #18
July 21, 2008


Upstaged by Urs

Poor Houdini! The way she worried and fretted about leaving Schatzi behind you’d think it was Gabe and all because she read that “It is common for Newfies to stop eating when their owners travel or are separated for a period of time.” As I logically explained to her it’s not like we boarded her for goodness sake. Doreen and Frank offered to keep her and she’s used to Marcy taking her and Gabe for walks so they’re kind of her extended family. Houdini wasn’t quite convinced and I guess neither was the considerably more svelte Schatzi that greeted us when we returned. I’m happy to report she has regained most of the weight she lost and is now speaking to us again.
**********

Thanks to my meticulous planning our flight to Switzerland for Elke and Franz’ wedding went without a hitch. We did take up a whole row of seats since Gabe and one of the girls had to have their own seats and we could hold the other girl. Susanna packed bottles of water for Noelle and Heidi to drink to relieve the pressure in their ears when we took off and landed. Since Gabe was older I decided to let him chew gum.

I was so proud of how the children behaved on the plane. Heidi and Noelle took turns napping and competing with their big brother to see who could charm the most people. It was close contest but I’m proud to say Gabe won. He even had the flight attendant, female of course, making paper airplanes for him.


**********
Mami and Papi couldn’t get over how the children had grown, especially Noelle and Heidi of course. Four months was such a long time when they’re babies. They were eating cereal now, sitting and starting to lunge and scoot, Noelle had finally cut a bottom tooth and Heidi’s had followed a few days later.

Gabe could hardly wait to unpack his little child-size suitcase he had so proudly pulled along side mine in the airport. He managed to hold off until he got to the living room where he starting showing Grandmami and Grandpapi his treasures. There was big sock monkey, some of his German picture books, crayons, toy cars and his wooden whistle, but one thing seemed to be missing.

“Guess what Grandmami? One time when I was sleeping with sock monkey he woked me and told me he was a big sock monkey now and didn’t need his teddy bear blanket so Mommie and me washed it and put it back in the drawer.”

Definitely a smiling, bright-eyed Grandmami and Grandpapi hug moment that even big sock monkey shared.

**********

We’d arrived a week before Elke and Franz’ wedding. Il Divo didn’t have any commitments until the end of July so we planned on staying a month. That way we’d have time to get together with relatives before the wedding at the end of June. Then we could relax and do some sightseeing with and without the children, and Mami insisted we couldn’t leave without celebrating my birthday on July 19th.

As she was talking about my birthday she and Susanna suddenly looked at the twins and grinned. That’s how it started and four days later on the 25th we celebrated Noelle and Heidi’s ‘half-birthday’ complete with an overflowing house full of aunts, uncles, cousins, and balloon-carrying children laughing and running all over. Heidi and Noelle were passed around like Christmas packages, jabbering and laughing and gumming the little tastes of cake they managed to get from their hands to their mouths.

Gabe explored and got dirty with the best of the boy cousins, ate more cake than he wore, and probably learned more about being Swiss in one afternoon than I’d ever taught him. To his dismay he also learned where Australia was located in Mami’s house. Fortunately he only paid it a brief visit following a dispute over a toy car. I breathed a sigh of relief when he didn’t ask how I knew exactly where Australia was.

**********

We had fine weather for Elke and Franz’ wedding. I had my fingers crossed Gabe wouldn’t run up the aisle carrying the rings and made sure myself they were tied on tightly. Thank goodness Luca was around to tell Gabe how he’d worn short pants when Susanna and I were married because Gabe had been well on his way to a major tizzy when he found out he wouldn’t be wearing long pants like the rest of the men in the wedding party.

I tried but I couldn’t help grinning as my solemn little man made his way down the aisle and safely handed the pillow to Father Ludwig. Then he skipped up the steps to me, took my hand and looked up with Susanna’s big brown eyes as if to say, “How did I do Papa?” I beamed my approval, eyes bright with tears, and gave his hand a squeeze. Then do you know what that little scamp did? He blink-winked me! It was all I could do not to laugh right up there on the altar. I could see Susanna laughing silently in the second pew. I think I have created a monster.

**********

The next three weeks flew by in a wonderful blur of activity punctuated by days where we came to a full stop, relaxing with our family in the sunny, blue-skied days of high summer. Lara indeed proved to be a perfect choice to help with the children and they adored her. The twins gradually became accustomed to bottles for all but their morning and evening feeds, which allowed us some free days for me to show Susanna some of my favorite places. Several evenings we’d have a quiet dinner out and then go to a concert or just stroll around.

I tuned up my bike and went for a few rides with my old motorcycle club while Mami helped Susanna learn how to embroider using the sewing machine. Being a very close family, my helpful brother and sisters gave the twins matching shirts along with suggestions to embroider. Fritz thought ‘Rock Star/Movie Star” would be appropriate, while Petra opted for ‘Cut/Paste’, Ingrid offered ‘1 of 2/2 of 2’ and Elke couldn’t resist buying Dr. Seuss with ‘Thing 1/Thing 2’ already on them.




By the time she was done practicing, I think Susanna was wery glad the shirts they gave Gabe came with trucks, cars or motorcycles printed on them, all except the one from Fritz. Always the big brother he had to have the last word. It was plain red with big black lettering that proclaimed, ‘My Dad Rocks.’

A few days before my birthday I surprised Houdini by taking her on the same ride through Glaubenburg Pass as I’d sent her on the computer. Well almost the same. She made me go much slower. I really think it was so she could look for Brown Swiss cows. As luck would have it we found several along the side of the road so we had to stop to pet them. I think she really missed Schatzi. It’s a good thing we’d finished our picnic lunch or she’d probably have tried to feed them too.

**********

Since we were leaving the following day, Mami had just the family over in the afternoon for dinner to celebrate my birthday. Even after all these years she hasn’t lost her touch. Her German chocolate cake is the very best! Let’s just keep that between us though OK?

“For you Papa. It’s from me. Open it,” Gabe the Boss said as he bounced up and down, finally ‘helping’ me when he thought I was going too slow.

“Mommie and me made it for you,” he announced proudly as I held up a double picture frame with a clay imprint of his pudgy hand on one side and Gabe giving me a blinky wink on the other.

“It’s the best present ever, Gabe. I love it and I love you.”

“I love you too Papa,” he declared, springing up to wrap his arms around my neck in a hug that would have done Houdini proud.


Visiting and Celebrating[u/] by Susanna


Poor Urs! Mr. Go By the Book was almost in a tizzy about leaving Schatzi for over a month. “After all she’s only a puppy.” It seems he has conveniently erased her recent, almost romantic, interlude from his hippocampus along with his embarrassing interlude with the young female vet in training.

A few weeks later it was not the ‘chisel-cheeked, blink-winking’ Herr Buhler who arrived with Schatzi for her immunization. “Oh, it’s you…I mean good morning, Mrs. Buhler.”

“Good morning, Andrea is it? Yes, I had an appointment last time Schatzi needed to see you so my husband kindly brought her in. By the way I was wondering just how many ‘well you knows’ it took for Urs to tell you what happened.”

Andrea and her pink cheeks mumbled her answer as she was overcome by a sudden attack of medical efficiency.

“Hmmm, that many,” I chuckled as I patted Schatzi’s head and told her to be a brave girl. Naturally she was.

Anyway, I too had read [u]Raising a Newfoundland and attacked the problem with typical Swiss efficiency acquired I suspect through marriage to Urs, much like becoming a naturalized citizen. So not only was Schatzi to live in the loving bosom of the Kane family but also return to the home of her beloved family during the two days a week Mrs. Paul would come in. She had been fairly itching to get her hands and organizational skills into the pantry and several closets and it would be good for Schatzi to be around another familiar face, especially one who had already been twisted around her not so little paw. Why would I not be surprised to return home to a freezer full of homemade doggie treats?

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If stroller folding and securing car seats were an Olympic event Urs would win the gold medal. I think he’s been practicing behind my back. He was practically a one-handed wonder getting the children settled on the plane. Well I didn’t exactly stand there twiddling my thumbs but he did do the grunt work magnificently, garnering more than his share of appreciative looks, especially for his bends and squats. I simply smiled serenely. Sorry ladies, those Buhler buns are mine, all mine.

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When we landed, Gabe informed me he didn’t need to use the restroom before we drove to Luzern. I should hope not since he’d made three trips to the lavatory on the plane. One necessary and the rest for ‘entertainment’ as Urs put it. So while Urs and Gabe went to get the luggage and pick up the SUV he’d rented, I ‘strolled’ the twins to the nearest baby changing station.

By the time they’d driven up out front to pick us up Noelle and Heidi had made everyone within hearing distance aware of the fact that it was time to eat. I couldn’t wait to share with Mami the dubious thrill of nursing twins while flying down the autobahn.

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What a great idea the half-birthday was! I knew Mami was dying to show off the twins and Gabe since most of the relatives had only seen pictures of them and everyone was in a party mood all week anticipating the wedding. I was a little bit worried how the twins would react to seeing so many strangers but they held their own and didn’t mind being handed off. When they did fuss to get down we turned them loose in a borrowed playpen or on blankets on the grass.

There was no end to the girl cousins who all thought themselves perfect babysitters. One of the older teenage girls, Lara, the daughter of Urs’ cousin Nadia seemed to be especially good with them. She was thrilled when we asked if she’d give Mami and Papi a hand watching the children once in awhile so Urs and I could have some time to ourselves while we’re here.

It was really more like a family gathering so we didn’t expect gifts and were overwhelmed by everyone’s thoughtfulness. The crowning glory were two identical handmade dresses from Mami, one yellow and one pink, hand-smocked but with nary a ruffle in sight Urs noted with a sigh of relief. Little does he know Mami and I are breaking him in gently. Today smocking, tomorrow ruffles.

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Urs looked so handsome in his tux and the girls were adorable in their new dresses from Mami. I decided, very logically you’ll notice, to go in alphabetical order to wear the pink dress. Don’t worry Noelle, it will be your turn next time.

Seeing Gabe in his little suit brought back a flood of memories. Although Luca was darling on my wedding day he couldn’t hold a candle to Gabe with his cute little knees showing. At least his curls stayed in place until the reception. There’s only so much spray you can get on a wiggly toddler. And that blinky wink! I would have been fine if I hadn’t looked at Urs. The master himself outdone by his offspring!



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I would tell you about my introduction to embroidery but then I’d have to kill you. Suffice it to say in the future I promise never to leave home without my handy dandy seam ripper.

On a much happier note, do you know where my dear tricky-nosed wombat took me? Of course he already told you didn’t he? Well he found this beautiful meadow of wildflowers for our picnic that he had kept a secret, the picnic that is. He couldn’t very well hide the meadow.

Anyway as we’re walking hand in hand through the meadow I coyly mentioned this might be an opportune moment to throw me to the ground and ravage me amongst the edelweiss. Instead of producing the desired result, my statement caused Bag Boy to suffer a sudden case of Swissness. Did I know edelweiss, a protected plant, was the unofficial flower of Switzerland and unfortunately found growing in rocky limestone? Ouch! Not so coyly I mentioned I was hungry. Immediately switching from Swiss Protector of Wildflowers to Swiss Lover he agreed food was a perfect start. Our picnic was delicious if a bit messy. The ravaging afterward was even better and I’m happy to report no edelweiss was harmed in the process although I can’t say the same for some of the lesser unprotected species.

“We’re home, Mami,” announced Urs.

Mami came out from the kitchen wiping her floury hands on her apron. “Ah you had a gute ride then dear hearts,” she observed with a knowing smile as she reached up to give Urs a kiss and picked a small wild flower out of his curls.

“Ja, Mami,” we giggled as Urs pulled me into a hug and kissed the top of my head.

What a Mami!

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Gabe was in his element at Urs’ birthday party. Not only did he get to hand Papa his presents, but he also got to be the boss and tell Papa to open them. Of course Papa obeyed promptly…most of the time. Gabe did need to jump in and help a couple of times when Papa was a bit too slow.

I’d also made frames with the twins handprints and pictures and even one of Schatzi and her pawprint. The day after we got home they were already hung in the music room, “My inspiration,” he announced proudly. Finally I’d given him a picture of the children and me that was small enough to fit easily in his suitcase when he was away.



Meeting and Greeting by Gabe

Schatzi was so wery happy to see me when we came back from Swissland she ‘most flattened me to the ground. Mommie and Papa went awwwww cuz she missed us so much every day and every day she didn’t eat all her supper.

I eat my supper no matter what ‘cept if it’s Brussel sprouts night. Mommie calls them ‘whistling greens’. She says if you eat them you can whistle good but I say I can whistle fine right now. That’s cuz one day when Papa and I and Schatzi were at the park Papa finded a little branch and broke some off. Then while I was playing he sat on the bench and went cut, cut, cut with his knife and made me a whistle. Mommie says only lip whistling counts but Papa and I know better.

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Flying on the airplane was the funnest thing. I was on a airplane before to go see Grandmuz and Grandpa John but I was little and can’t remember hardly. This time I sat with Papa and know what? He let me sit by the window cuz I’m a big boy now.

Know what else? Papa gave me gum to chew and chew so my ears won’t pop out when we go up. I chewed and chewed like Papa said till we were way up high by the clouds. Then Papa held out his hand and said, “Spit out your gum, Gabe,”.

“It’s gone, Papa,” I did that high shoulders thing he does sometimes and held my hands out to show him it was gone.

“Where did it go Gabe?” Papa said kinda soft and low. I never knew his eyebrows went down that far.

“In my tummy,” I answered in my little oops voice.

“Next time I’ll have to tell Mommie, Gabe. You NEVER swallow gum. Understand?” Papa said as his eyes looked up and his shook his head no.

“Yes, Papa,” I promised and did a blinkly winkly but no smile cuz you’re not ‘posed to smile when you promise. Papa almost did though.

I love going potty on the airplane! Their bafroom is wery teeny tiny and you push the button after and blue water comes up and goes ‘whoosh’ and sucks everything out. It’s kinda like when Mommie and Papa take me out to eat and I get a drink with a straw and I suck to the bottom. It makes a wery loud sound. I like to do that sound ‘cept Papa says, “Gabe, you’re all done,” and puts my glass far away.

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Elle and Heidi had a birfday ‘cept not a whole year one cuz that’s on Christmas. Grandmami and Mommie said they could have a party now since Christmas is kinda busy wif baby Jesus and Santa. I got to play and play wif my boy cousins. I like them the bestest cuz they don’t try to be the boss like my girl cousins.

We went on a bug hunt and we found lots. Know what? They have the same kind of bugs here as Papa and I found at home. I wonder how they got way across the water. My cousins speak American like Mommie but Papa said for them to talk Switz-grrr-man like he does so I could practice. When I used up all my Switz-grrr-man words they helped me. Know what else? Sumtimes when you play you don’t need words.

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I was the pillow boy when Auntie Elke got married. I had to walk wery slow Papa said so I did, right up to Faver Ludwig. He said, “Thank you Gabe,” in his whisper voice. I said, “That’s OK,” back in my whisper voice. Then I went to Papa. He squeezed my hand and smiled all crinkly cuz he wasn’t ‘posed to talk but I know it means you did good so I gave him a blinkly winkly back cuz I couldn’t talk eever.

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I waited and waited and finally it was Papa’s birfday party. My turn to be the boss. I gave him his presents and told him to open them and he did. I even had to help him if he wasn’t doing it right. He liked my present the bestest cuz I’m his big boy, that’s me, Gabe.


Left Behind by Schatzi


Wasting away, that’s what I was and then finally My Family came back to me. Why did they leave me? Don’t they know I’m the furry sister? I’m family too.


Ackshully (sorry, I used to be a good speller before I became a Buhler) I behaved wery well during their absence. I must however remember the Kane’s cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing. Otherwise I think we bonded nicely. Oh, and the sniffing greeting seems to be just a dog thing.
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Mrs. Paws, bless her heart, is now completely trained to come open the door when I want to go out. I probably shouldn't tell you this, but sometimes I don't even really need to go. It's just reassuring to know that she’ll interrupt almost anything she’s doing to open the door when I want her to. I was particularly gratified that time she was on the ladder upstairs in My Boy’s room. It’s good to be the boss.


Buhler Family Blog #19
January 1, 2009


My Talisman by Urs

Happy New Year! The heavy snowfalls of early December have given Switzerland the best start to the skiing season that anyone can remember and the Buhlers have taken over Klosters. Well, to be more precise it’s the Chesa Falcun chalet, but more of that later. Right now I’m lounging on the heated terrace, sipping an excellent glass of wine after an even more excellent day of skiing.

The best part today was the summit, where, at almost 3,000m, you can look down on the ring of mountain tops beneath you, eat boiling tomato soup at a cozy restaurant and rewarm your legs with a steep little black run before linking in to the long trail home.





I can hear the squeals of laughter as I sit watching Susanna and the children playing in the snow. A smiling short trim woman in a pink ski outfit with just a hint of two braids poking out from under her multistriped cap rides herd on two rosy-cheeked Buddhas in pink and yellow, while a taller red-suited bundle of energy, dark curls peeking out from under his stocking cap, runs and jumps in the snow.

“Papa, look!” Gabe shouts, falling down in the snow to make a snow angel as Noelle and Heidi plop down and lay wiggling in imitation of their big brother.

“No Heidi, you little wombat, like this,” Gabe is up in a flash bat winging and kneeling in the snow, attempting to move her arms and legs but receiving little cooperation and a lot of attitude. Yes that’s our little Heidi. Undaunted, he moves to Noelle and although he receives less attitude and a little more cooperation the results are still wery non-angelic. Giving an exasperated sigh he shrugs his shoulders with outstretched hands and looks at me as if to say,” I tried,” as the overturned turtle sisters happily wiggle on their backs in the snow.


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Was it only five months ago we sat outside at my birthday watching the twins crawl? I look at them now and it seems as if they’ve always been walking and getting into everything. That Heidi not only copies everything Gabe does but also, Gott help us, thinks up things he never thought of doing. Noelle’s more the observer and planner. She’ll watch and see what Heidi’s doing and then decide if she wants to do it, sometimes yes and sometimes no. They will be a formidable team once they can talk and plan together. Poor Gabe will be lucky if he’s allowed to be the boss of sock monkey by the time they get through with him.

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When Frankie cautioned us to enjoy our long break because we’d be earning it he wasn’t lying. Less than a week after we got back from Switzerland we performed at the Istanbul Music Festival Gala and we’ve been on the go ever since.





It was back to the studio for the finishing touches on the album and then off to Rome for the cover shoot.





By this time the girls were standing if they held onto the furniture and calling everyone mama and papa, even Schatzi. As big brother, Gabe kept trying to correct them of course, especially after he started to school.

Yes, our little boy is now going to school halfdays. By the time we returned from Switzerland, several children in his playgroup had either moved or were already in preschool so Susanna and I talked it over and decided it was time. He’s so inquisitive and seems to catch on quickly, sometimes too quickly, and this seemed to be a good window of opportunity. Susanna researched several places and we settled on a Montessori school not too far from us. To say we were nervous the first day would be to say Attila the Hun had a slight anger management problem.

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In August I jumped back on the Il Divo merry-go-round promoting the album that came out the first of November. In between it was finalizing the song list, rehearsals, fittings, and all the hundreds of details to get ready for the World Tour starting in January.

Houdini has been a real trooper handling things on the home front. She and the children had a birthday party for Schatzi in August. Sorry I missed that. Schatzi now has permission to go upstairs. I’m not as sorry I missed that. Then a week later she came in heat again. I’m definitely not sorry I missed that.

I did make it home for Gabe’s 3rd birthday. Just in time to burn the meat Houdini teased. It may have been slightly crispy but I was making sure it was well cooked and no one seemed to complain. Gabe loved the red tricycle we gave him and after I adjusted the pedals he caught on quite quickly. Susanna said it only took one skinned knee to convince him to wear jeans when he rides.

Meanwhile the twins were cruising around everywhere holding on, jabbering, playing pat-a-cake and I’m glad to say now calling the correct person mama and papa. I don’t think stranger anxiety will even be in their vocabulary, although Noelle is still a little more selective than Heidi the Hospitable. Gabe went around warning everyone to watch their plates. Now that each girl is armed with four teeth they’ve become the Finger Food Queens and as far as they’re concerned everything’s fair game, including Schatzi’s treats. Gabe was immensely relieved. “Thank Gott! Now I won’t be finger food anymore.”

Susanna’s birthday was in the middle of the week so we just had a quiet dinner at Mi Famiglia’s. At the weekend we took the plunge and spent our first night away from the children at the same hotel as our Valentine’s dinner. Now that the children are older we were only one joint-phone call worried, even me.

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The promo trip to Australia went very well and we were back in England when the album hit the stores. That time change coming back always hits me hard and I really felt guilty that Urs the Papa and Urs the Husband were so tired. It was crazy as usual with all the TV and radio interviews, CD signings, and appearances but so heartening at the same time to realize how loyal our fans had remained.

The promo schedule was kind to us in that we were in the States toward the end of November. Susanna, the children, and Nanny T flew to Florida a week before Thanksgiving, our traditional visit. To hear Susanna tell it, once Grandmuz and Grandpa John met them Nanny T was in clear danger of losing her job. Gabe and Grandpa John were joined at the hip and Grandmuz didn’t know which twin to spoil first. I ackshully had two whole days there before we all flew home together as a surprise. I waited till the last minute to tell her we’d be on the same flight. Now who’s magical Houdini? In reality I’d booked their tickets in August as soon as I knew our schedule. After all I am Swiss.

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So that brings me back to Switzerland. We arrived, rather like descended on Mami and Papi two days before Christmas, having sent presents on earlier. At my birthday in July we had started talking about getting together for some skiing at Christmas since our wedding present to Elke and Franz was a trip. Fritz was the only one who had other plans. It was his year to visit the in-laws during Christmas break. So it was settled; Petra, Willem and their two boys, Ingrid, Hans and their daughter, Elke and Franz, and our family would go for a week of skiing starting the day after Christmas. We all agreed to pitch in and invite Lara as a babysitter and of course give her some free time to ski too. I’d heard of a new place that was just opening this season and volunteered to make the arrangements.

So, after celebrating a wonderful family Christmas complete with cake but no birthday presents for Noelle and Heidi, here we are high above the village and accessible only by two four-wheel drives, complete with chauffeurs. The exterior may look traditional but indoors it has a lift to take you between the four floors, a resident chef and two other staff.





These few days, this golden moment in time, will be my talisman, my good-luck piece tucked safely in the pocket of my memory. In a few weeks I will do what I was created to do: perform my music, connecting with the audience in a special moment of shared energy. Then between the concerts, these precious family recollections will keep me centered and sustain me during the grueling schedule of the tour.



Sweet Swiss Dreams by Susanna


“Urs, no, you cannot use my favorite pink scarf for your snowman. Go get one of your own!”

And here comes Gabe with two carrots.

“Gabriel just where did you get those?”

“James, the cooker gave them to me Mommie. I asked please,” Gabe called over his shoulder as he ran to help Papa put on the finishing touches.

“He’s called the chef, Gabriel. You didn’t blinky wink did you?” I called after him.

“Only a little one,” he answered as he handed a carrot to his beaming father.

“That’s not fair, Bag Boy, taking advantage of poor James like that. When are you going teach Gabe the difference between using blinky winks for good and evil?” I laughed.

“There’s a difference?” he deadpanned. Then gave me a lethal one to prove his point.

Bag Boy’s choice of a place to stay was simply inspired. I feel another tradition coming on. The chalet is perfect and worth all the grunt days without him these past three months…almost.

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It wasn’t easy but I managed to video most new things the twins did and Gabe fell in love with the web cam. What a little ham! How many times did Urs listen patiently to him sing his ABC’s?

At least he was there to hear his first ‘Papa’ to the right person and see Heidi and Noelle take their first few steps alone and he just about lost it when they learned to wave goodbye. Those times were the hardest, but then the hellos made up for everything…for all of us.

I still remember the night he decided it was time for the twins to start finger foods. I’d been telling him they were ready but did he believe me? No, not until Heidi swiped some of his rosti off his plate. Surprised outrage would best describe his expression as Noelle cried in dismay because her sister wouldn’t share, and Gabe giggled because he knew Papa would never share willingly. I simply smiled and gave Heidi a mental thumbs up since I’d been feeding them both finger foods for a week now when he wasn’t around. Even Schatzi rose from her lookout post under their high chairs in hopes someone in their excitement might drop some food.

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Although Urs’ schedule has been hectic we’ve been very lucky to have him here for the important things like Gabe’s birthday; so what if the meat turned into crispy critters. He got to see Gabe ride his tricycle which was good and didn’t get to see his first fall and skinned knee which was also good. I think he would have had a fussing tizzy which would have frightened Gabe. Since I stayed calm and didn’t make a fuss he didn’t either. In fact he was patched up and back on his tricycle in no time. Now however when he rides, he insists on wearing his jeans or tricycle leathers as he calls them. Hmmm wonder where he got that from?

As you heard, for my birthday we spent the whole night away from the children and survived better than I had thought…much better. God bless you Nanny T. Besides the promise of a wonderful skiing trip at Christmas he gave me a bangle in sterling silver with pink enamel.

It felt like a herd of wild wombats were playing tag in my stomach the first day Gabe went to school. I’d taken him for a visit and we’d talked about it in preparation. I guess someone should have sat me down and prepared me as well. Once we got there and he got settled in his class, a mixed group of children 3-6 years old, I decided to hang around a bit to see how he did. In other words I wanted to be sure my precious little baby, my firstborn, would not miss his Mommie and come flying into her arms for comfort and protection. As if… After about 10 minutes he finally noticed me and came over, “Mommie, you can go now. I’m busy.” So much for missing Mommie.

That night when Urs came home his first question was, “What did you do in school today Gabe?”

“Oh, I teached myself,” he replied airly. What silly parents we are, of course he did.

Speaking of teaching himself, I’m not quite sure but I have a sneaking suspicion Gabe is teaching Noelle and Heidi a few new words. Suddenly they’ve started with ‘wom, wom, wom’. Now it’s baa, baa, baa. Do you suppose they could just go from being one year old to three? It may be all an innocent distraction while they learn to say Gabe but I have my doubts. Right now each of them has a different name for him, neither of which he likes. They have mastered ‘Sha’ for Schatzi though.

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He may not be teaching himself but he is in the children’s ski class here at Klosters every morning and Urs thinks he’s doing ‘wery’ well but then what father wouldn’t? You can’t expect any self-respecting Swiss father to go around saying his first male offspring is a klutz on the kiddie slope now can you? Actually it’s the mother who is the klutz I’m afraid. I’ve never skied before so Urs signed me up and stayed to watch. How embarrassing! I had a talk with him that night and threatened to…well let’s just say it won’t be happening again.

I have made progress though and yesterday Urs took me to Madrisa on the other side of town. It has the sun all day and the runs are small. Urs said he was proud of me as we took the charming riverside piste (trail) back into the village.

All the cousins have had a ball here, skiing, playing in the snow, sledding and going on the recently opened snowshoe trails. The routes have been designed with wildlife in mind, mainly to protect the animals, but we were thrilled that we saw a deer and a snow bunny the day Urs and I took the children. We rented snowshoes and Urs and I had the girls facing front in their sling carriers. After a few false starts Gabe hardly needed to hold our hand. Our little group may not have been the speediest and our technique was not the best but we’ll remember it for years to come.

The chalet also had toys, games, books, and videos for the children along with a TV with satellite channels and a computer with a wifi connection.

One of the other great features of the chalet was an outdoor heated tub that the older children loved along with Uncle Urs and Gabe. Later we took turns with the other couples so each of us could have some quiet romantic time alone and it was. Can you just imagine sitting in the hot bubbly water late one night sipping champagne with fat lazy snowflakes drifting down and you don’t even feel them because with efficient Swiss planning you’re protected by the overhanging roof?

And afterwards, wrapped in thick robes, we made our way to the top floor to snuggle in front of the fire. As we gazed through the uncurtained wall of windows across the village to the mountains and stars beyond at a view hardly changed in a hundred years, we loved each other and fell asleep entwined in sweet Swiss dreams.



Teaching, Fishing, and Swissland by Gabe


I love Swissland! I wish we could be here everyday and everyday. I love to play with my cousins. Sumtimes I can hardly ’member all their names .

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Guess what? I had a birfday and now I’m one, two, three years old. I got a red tricycle and I could ride it good ‘cept one time I falled off on my knee and it bleeded. I went cry, cry, cry, but Mommie said, “I have something to make it all better,” and she did. First she washed my knee. It didn’t feel better. Then she put some tooby stuff on it. It still didn’t feel better. Then she put a bandaid on it and it really did feel better, honest. Know what kinda bandaid? A race car bandaid of course. You could try it if you fall down ‘cept they’re just for boys.

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I go to school now. Did you know that? Mommie tried to stay and watch me but I told her to go home please. I think Heidi and Elle are crying. Then she did what I said.

I have fun at my school. We get to be the boss of ourself. I like that. We can pick what we want to do. They have lots of stuff you can take apart and see how it works and puzzles and tools, not the sharp kind and we do ‘speriments and see what happens. Mommie gives me a snack to bring and know what? I’m even the boss to tell myself when I want to eat it. And NO naps less we want to sit and rest and read a book Sometimes when I read my eyes close for a little rest but that’s OK.

In my class some of the kids are big and some are not so big and some are like me but even Serge, he’s the biggest, doesn’t try to be the boss of me ‘cept sometimes he helps me if we think I need help.

Here’s some of their names. Mattia, Petrus and Alain, they’re boys and Emma, Anna, and Julia are girls. There’s a Leonie ‘cept she’s not my cousin. I call my girl cousin Big Leonie.

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Elle and Heidi are more fun now that they can move but sometimes they get in my room and move too much. One day Heidi found one of my toy cars and thought it was finger food. Elle even stoled Schatzi’s doggy cookie. What a little wombat! That’s what I call them now, the wombat sisters, but only to myself. I’ve almost teached them to say wombat ‘cept they can only say one part at a time same as my name. I wish their mouths would hurry up and grow so they could say both parts.

My cousin Luca teached me to make snow angels. Then I tried to show Heidi and Elle how but their arms and legs wouldn’t listen to me. I don’t think they know I’m the boss yet.

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We went to Florda and know what? Grandpa John took me fishing and I got to put the wiggly worm on the hook. I even almost caught a fish. I think Mommie wanted to come with but Grandpa John said, “Maybe some other time punkin. It’s the boys’ day.” Punkin, that’s a funny word. It was Mommie’s name when she was a little girl like me and here I thought she was always growed up. Papa got to go fishing with us one day when he was done talking and singing on the TV.

Oh I ‘most forgot. Nanny T came to Florda wif us. She took Papa’s place cuz he was somewhere else but he came home on the airplane wif us.

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Before we came here to the shall-lay, don’t you just love saying that word? shall-lay Anyway we went to Grandmami and Grandpapi’s for Christmas. Santa must be wery smart because he knowed to bring my presents there. He even bringed Elle’s and Heidi’s too ‘cept they got birfday presents in the summer so no extra presents now, just Christmas. That’s the rule.

Then after Christmas ‘most everybody came to the shall-lay. It has lots of bedrooms and know what? This is the bestest part; Luca, Jakob, and I got to be in the same room all by ourselves. Guess what else? We all sleeped in the same big, big bed, even bigger than Mommie and Papa’s. We laughed and talked every night but real quiet cuz else Big Lara or somebody’s mama or papa would come in.

Big Lara, I call her that cuz she’s not the cousin Lara. Well she had to sleep with Leonie in their big, big bed and Elle and Heidi had cribs in there too. I bet they didn’t get to giggle and talk like us.

I learned how to ski and fall down and walk in the snow with big flat shoes and surprise! One day Papa was slinging Elle and Mommie was slinging Heidi and I was walking in the snowshoes and we saw a white rabbit, just like in Alice in Wonderland ’cept I didn’t see it go down the hole.

You won’t believe it but they even have a outside bathtub that bubbles and tickles and Papa took me in it with all my cousins too. I guess we were clean enough cuz there wasn’t any soap and everybody wore their swimsuits. Elle and Heidi couldn’t come in cuz they still wear diapers. I can cuz I wear big boy pants.

Papa said, “Gabe, we have a rule. No whizzing in the tub.”

“Yes, Papa,” I said with my serious face. And I didn’t, not even one time.


New Heights by Schatzi


Oh rapturous joy! I am one year old. That’s seven to you people out there but one sounds ever so much better, like I’m still a little puppy and can get away with stuff cuz I don’t know any better. He he!

In case you’re wondering My Woman took me to the vet, just for my yearly check-up, not for THE SHOT like someone who shall remain nameless unless he has my leash or food in his hand. I weigh 125 pounds and am 26 inches tall. What? I’m just big-boned.

Memo to self: Do not suddenly stand straight up when I’m under My Girls high chairs.

BTW I’ve had another invite to the banquet of love but came up empty…again. My Woman kept me on a wery tight leash, literally and figuratively. But hey, there’s always next time.

Now that I’m one year old my status in the Buhler household has risen immeasurably. Well not exactly. But it has risen by a height of sixteen steps. I am now allowed upstairs! Getting up was the easy part but that coming down can be tricky, especially if you let your butt get in front of you.

I love going upstairs. There are so many interesting places to explore but the best are the water rooms. One of my favorite things to do is to push the curtain aside with my head and surprise My Peepul. Their eyes get wery wide and they say words I don’t think were made for my delicate ears. I mean is it my fault they didn’t close the door good? I didn’t exactly pick the lock with my webbed paws you know.

If they’re not careful I’m afraid My Boy is going to be adding a few of those words to his vocabulary. Why just the other weekend My Boy and I were in his room playing a little game I taught him. He says, “Schatzi, lay down,” and I do. Then he says, “Schatzi, roll over,” and I do, right into perfect scratch-my-tummy position and of course he can’t help himself. After all I am adorable.

Well after he had finished scratching all my itchy spots I decided to see if anything was going on in the water rooms so I lumbered on down the hall and nosed the door open. Bad mistake on oh so many levels. My Man was not in a wery playful mood. “Schiesse blah blah blah, Susanna get this blah blah blah dog, schiesse, blah blah out of here!”

Memo to self: Do not play tug-of-war with My Man’s underwear when he's on the toilet.


Hi Everybody by The Twins


Hi all you posters and lurkers out there in Kissing Hand Land. We just wanted to stop by and introduce ourselves. Mommie said we had to wait until we were one year old because before we weren’t any years old. So here we are.

I’m Noelle, aka Elle to older brothers who spend a lot, and I mean a lot of time in Australia. I wouldn’t exactly label him a slow learner but as far as discipline is concerned…well you figure it out. (Just between you and me I think Heidi may have inherited some of his undisciplined genes.)

What! Now you just wait a cotton-pickin’ minute there Noelle. Just because you’re Miss Plans and I’m Miss Operations doesn’t give you the right to lump me in with our wombat brother. We are identical after all, nourished together in our mother’s womb, born only a few minutes apart, why we even held hands while we suckled at her breasts, in tandem if I remember correctly, so it’s Thelma and Louise here all the way baby, for life.

Oh hi there people, sorry I didn’t see you reading. I’m Heidi, the cute little one who’s probably going to go through life wearing dirndl dresses, braids, and learning to yodel if Mommie has anything to say about it but hey that’s OK. I’m the flexible, go with the flow twin, the doer if you will.

OK, OK but I get to be Louise. I am the introspective twin, the thinker if you will. I guess I’m more like my Papa.

Hellloooo, who has the curly hair here? Yours is definitely not curly; wavy maybe on a good day if Mommie kind of fluffs it up with the brush. Let’s just call it even Steven and get on with this blog.

Fine by me. Well the first thing you should know is we are part of a very special family. (Please note the peculiar spelling gene is recessive in the female line, thank Gott) How could you not be special when you have a Papa who is a Bag Boy, a Mommie who is a Houdini, an older brother who is a wombat, and a large furry sister named Schatzi who occasionally goes by the name of Schiesse?

Actually, we all know Gabriel Christian Buhler, aka Monkey Man is not a true wombat in the sense that he doesn’t eat leaves and shoots and to my knowledge has never been to Australia however he does seem fixated on that word for some reason. He was so cute bending down to us in our playpen saying, “Wom-bat, wom-bat,” like he was trying to hypnotize us. Does he think we’re the dumb demented sisters or what? Well if he wants dumb we can do dumb. So we decided Noelle would just say the ‘wom’ part and I’d say the ‘bat’ part. It drives him absolutely up the wall!

Just like his name, eh Thelma? Why he couldn’t just introduce himself and say, “Hi I’m your big brother. My name is Gabe.?” I mean how difficult can that be? But no he has to say “My name is Gay-buh.” So to Heidi he’s ‘Gay’ and to me he’s ‘buh’. I guess we should probably take pity on the poor boy before he develops a split personality but he’s so easy.

You know Louise, I just had a scary thought. When we do start saying the words correctly he’ll think he’s actually taught us. We can’t have that. Wait, I’ve got a brilliant idea! We’ll impress the pants off Mommie and Papa. They’ll be so overwhelmed by our obviously superior language skills, they won’t even notice Gabe chattering on about teaching us. Here’s what we’ll do. Tomorrow night during supper, when you’re squishing your peas and carrots together, you know the way that makes Papa cringe and roll his eyes, just say, “Gabe is a wombat,” real soft like. Don’t even look up, just keep squishing and eating. I bet that will get their attention.

Excuse me, Miss Operations, but I think that falls more into your area of expertise than mine.

But I thought since you’re older I’d give you the honor. Besides your blinky wink is better than mine.

That well may be but you have Papa wound around your little finger tighter than I do. You know he’s a sucker for your curls and don’t forget the look on his face the first time you waved bye bye.

Then we’ll do it together, Jaws 1 and 2, Cut and Paste, Rock Star and…

Don’t even go there baby sister. Let’s just leave it at Thelma and Louise, together forever. BTW is Australia big enough for two?

I sure hope so. I’d be lonely there without you.

PS. We still need to take a lot of naps so we won’t be back until we’re a little older. Just think how smart we’ll be then.

Buhler Family Blog #20
January 1, 2010

Oh no! by Urs

“Thank you so much Claudia. You’ve been most helpful.”

“Not at all Herr Buhler. I was happy to help. That’s part of our job. Fortunately Gabriel kept his head and remembered the rules. He really is making remarkable progress and we’re so happy to have him back again this season.”

“Yes, well thank you again,” I said as I held Gabe’s mittened hand tightly in mine and started to leave.

Just then Gabe turned back with a wave, “Bye Miss Claudia!”

“Gabe you didn’t, did you?” I asked not daring to look at him.

“Only a little good one Papa,” he said softly.

It was then that I lost it completely and bent down to squeeze him in a tearful bear hug that I never wanted to end. Could he possibly know how much I love him? How precious he is?

I straightened and retied his striped scarf and tucked some stray curls under his cap as I composed myself. The next thing I knew he was holding my face between his mittened hands and kissing my cheek.

“It’s alright Papa. I’m here. You’re safe now.”

I stood up slowly with a sigh, head shake and eye roll and smiled down at him. Then as if on cue we traded blinky winks and turned our skis toward the distant buildings.

“I swear Gabriel Christian you’ll be the death of me yet.”

“Oh no, not you too Papa. That’s what Mommie always says.”

“I guess a few more gray hairs won’t matter as long as you’re safe and sound. Look over there Gabe! It’s the children’s restaurant; isn’t that your favorite? Let’s stop and get some hot chocolate… and plan how we’re going to explain this to Mommie.”





**********

A few more gray hairs, well I guess that’s a small price to pay as I look back on this eventful year, although with our family I sometimes feel I’ll be saying this for the next 30 years or so.

Where to start…probably with the Tour. We began in the States and Canada in mid-January and finished up in Europe in June. The scheduling was improved a bit by doing several back-to-back concerts in the same city with a few days off in between rather than concert, travel, concert, travel. Still by the time we staggered home in June we all felt as if we’d done the Iron Man Competition.

Since all four of us wanted to be finished by December, we only took off half of June and all of July and began the second leg of the Tour in August. That took us to Australia, Indonesia, Asia, South America and Mexico.

After some soul-searching and a lot of discussion, some heated, some coolly levelheaded, we’ve signed another four-year contract. During that time we’ve committed to do 3 albums and a maximum of 25 concerts a year. In addition we’ll have four consecutive months off each year to pursue other interests. I think we all see it as a way to gradually transition back into our pre-Il Divo careers.

**********

Just as Susanna predicted, we’re back at the same chalet so this must now be a Buhler tradition. I keep teasing her that anything we do more than once she wants to call a tradition. Needless to say some traditions are much more pleasant than others.

Which leads me to Schatzi. As Gabe would say, she won’t be heating up anymore. Thank Gott! While I was home in July she came in heat and Susanna, I’m sure with more than a little begging from Schatzi, decided it was time for her to experience the joys of motherhood…one time only. To my credit I did build her a deluxe whelping box, make that a humungous deluxe whelping box, after all Newfies usually have 8-10 puppies in a litter.

Gott must have looked down on my whelping box and said, “It is good,” because fortuitously I was not even on the same continent when this blessed, magical, not-to-be-missed-by-the-children event occurred. I shudder to think of the questions Houdini had to answer. The blow-by-blow descriptions by the children were more than enough thank you very much. Whoever invented those damn video cameras anyway?

Although Susanna had read books to the children and answered their questions in her totally unflappable teacher way, when the actual event occurred I received varying accounts. Schatzi was pooping puppies. She was coming apart into new little Schatzi’s, and then came Gabe the expert. I should have known. “No you silly wombat sisters, don’t you know the puppies are being borned from her ‘gina?” Now I know it’s a good idea to give each body part an anatomically correct name, but Houdini, that’s our little boy!




Puppies and Babies by Susanna


I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later and thank God it was with Urs. I mean every child gets lost at least once in their life don’t they? And who better to find him than his well-ordered, logical Swiss father? Besides, despite being a little imp sometimes, Gabe is smart as a tack, does pay attention, has a good memory and knows his personal information in three languages.

Memo to self: Start practicing with the twins. I have a feeling they’ll make Gabe look like a homebody.

**********

Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies.

For a city girl, born and bred who lived in apartments most of her life I think I handled the puppy experience with flying colors, along with a little help from Schatzi of course. So despite my lack of expertise, ‘I don’t know nothin’ ‘bout birthing no puppies, Miss Scarlett,’ (oops, sorry I just always wanted to say that), Schatzi performed her motherly duties perfectly with a minimum of help from me and loads of moral support and encouragement from her Boy and Girls.

I’d read a couple of books to the children about puppies’ but had completely forgotten that I’d told them about Urs playing music for me when they were ‘getting ready to be born’. My sweet, tender-hearted Gabe hadn’t forgotten though. So as Schatzi performed the miracle of birth, her puppies were welcomed into the world by the awed whispers of her human family and the soft strains of Il Divo. You’re never too young to be a Diva or an Uber you know.


The vet dropped by the next day and gave everyone a thumbs-up, even the humans, for a job well done. Schatzi proved to be a mother par excellence and although she was very watchful for the first few days when we handled the puppies, she soon relaxed. There’s nothing quite like sweet little puppy breath as you hold a soft furry bundle and they snuggle up into your neck.

The children were fascinated by the puppies closed eyes and their ability to blindly root around to find their dinner. Gabe liked nothing better than to give them a little help and then look up beaming with pride as if he’d fed them himself. I’d give him a hug, bury a kiss in his Papa curls, and offer a silent prayer that all our children would never lose their loving kindness.

Another of his favorite moments was when even before their eyes were open, they would crawl to the other end of the box to potty so as not to soil where they slept with Schatzi. I just didn’t have the heart to tell him it was instinct not his command to, “Go potty puppies.”

Did Urs tell you we’re going to keep one of the males? Probably not since I had to do some tough negotiation but the black lingerie clinched the deal…in more ways than one.

Actually it is quite logical. We never want to think of being Schatzi-less but someday it will happen and then at least we’ll have part of her still with us. I might have forgotten a teensy weensy detail when I negotiated however; I plan on doing this at least until each of our less than 20 children is grown and married. Oh and I almost forgot what Urs negotiated. Schatzi has been spayed.

**********

The funniest thing happened just a few days after the tour ended. After a very thorough shower and testing of the handicapped bench, not necessarily in that order, we dried each other off and put on our robes. Then my romantic husband picked me up and headed toward the bed.

Unfortunately we were a little too late. I didn’t even know Schatzi could jump that high. There she was sitting like the queen on her throne. If I didn’t know better I’d have said she was almost smiling.
Urs hastily set me down and even more hastily chased Schatzi off the bed, out of the room, and down the stairs as I followed him. “Urs please swear quietly, you know what happened last time.”

“Stupid dog! She’s just paying me back for having her spayed,” he said closing the door firmly. “What last time?”

“You mean I didn’t tell you about that one?”

Then I told him about the time I heard Gabe say ‘Schiesse’ one day when he was playing with Schatzi.

“We don’t use that kind of language, Gabe. Where did you hear it?”

“Papa said it.”

“Well, that doesn’t make it right. You don’t know what it means.”

“I do too. It means Schatzi is trying to eat his underwear.”

When Urs finally stopped laughing we picked up where he had set me down.

**********

Thelma and Louise, aka Heidi and Noelle are two. I’m waiting for the terrible part. I know they’re secretly plotting and planning. I now have two designated Australia’s with a third on standby in case of a total mutiny. Of course as Gabe has already learned, Australia is only limited to a parent’s imagination and mine is pretty darn scary.

It looks like Noelle has inherited her mother’s less than curly hair gene but her blinky wink will rival Gabe’s in another year. Fortunately she has far more restraint and confines her charm to the immediate family, especially Papa. Of course he is utterly enchanted. With Heidi, restraint seems to be a four-letter word. She’s definitely more of a tomboy, fearless, ready to tackle anything. Noelle likes to ease into things, but once she feels confident can be just as unstoppable as Heidi.

For example Heidi threw a tizzy when she couldn’t go with Gabe for ski lessons because she was too young. Noelle could have cared less. We did take them ice skating and they had a great time mostly sawing their feet back and forth, falling down, and giggling but I can just see Heidi trying to out do her big brother next year. I’d better keep practicing or I’ll still be on the bunny slope waving to Gabe and Heidi as they fly by.

If I had known girls were so easy to potty train I would have had them first. Gabe was extremely disappointed when he discovered cheerios would not be needed for their training. Urs on the other hand was extremely delighted and has already been practicing the Buhler Glance. I know what that means…he’s missing the patter of little feet, the 3AM feedings, all those new and interesting questions, no definitely not that last one. How quickly he forgets.

Seriously we have decided the time is right for another baby, God willing, especially since babies seem to be the main topic of conversation lately. Oh I guess I forgot to tell you; that’s why Elke and Franz aren’t here this year. Their first child is due in February and I’m sure you’ll all be excited about this; Juliana and Seb have a son, René. Poor Juli was on pins and needles worrying if Seb would be home in time since she was due at the end of June. As it was he made it with a week to spare. Rene is just precious and such a good baby. Seb is so proud of his son. At last count he’d filled three photo albums.

Amelie is thrilled too. She’s been talking about being a big sister ever since the twins were born. Now that she’s in Gabe’s preschool class all’s right with her world. They really do play well together. I love having Amelie over here to play and with the new baby Juli can always use the extra time. I know what a godsend she was for me when the twins were little.

Uh oh, here comes Gabe with a handful of the girls’ ponytail bands and a brush. I have a feeling I know what’s coming next.

“Mommie I need…”

“I’m not sure if your hair is long enough but Mommie will try, Gabe. Turn around please.”

“…just like Papa.”

“Of course, Gabe. Just like Papa.”



Missing by Gabe

I am a super skier. No more Edgie Wedgies that hold my ski ends together. I’ve ’proved wery much since last year. Miss Claudia said so. I like Miss Claudia. She has pretty yellow hair and a blue snowsuit. I give her blinky winks every day and every day.

One day Miss Claudia said we could graduate to the obstickle course. Everyone else had to stay with Mister Lars. She took me and Henri and Albert but before we ski we had to say the ski rule: If you get lost go stand by Radulf the Reindeer sign at the lift. She said to watch wery careful and take the trail with the green dinosaur sign. That’s cuz it goes over the little bump, bump, bump part and through the trees and down the valley. We all watched wery careful and went bump, bump, bump down the hill. That was wery fun and we didn’t fall.

Then the next day she said we were even more better and she took us on the oompa loompa trail with even more bigger bumps. That was even funner. Know what? No one had to go stand by Radulf. Not even Henri cuz he only falled down one time and got up wery fast and Miss Claudia waited for him.

Everyday I telled Papa how good I skied and I could show him, so after lunch I took him skiing. I said did he want to go on the dino trail or the oompa loompa trail. He picked oompa loompa. I’m SURE that’s what he said. Before we started I had to teach Papa the Radulf the Reindeer rule. I told him to watch for the oompa loompa sign. I’m SURE that’s what I said. Papa and I started skiing but that’s when it happened. He did a dino and I did a oompa loompa and Papa was gone.

Oh well, he’ll have to see me do the big bump, bump, bumps next time. When I got to the bottom of the oompa loompa trail know who wasn’t there? Papa. Guess who had to go stand by Radulf and wait for lost Papa? Gabe.

**********

Oh happy day! My bestest friend Am-ee is in my class at preschool. We play and play and even have our snack together whenever we want cuz we’re the boss of ourselves…sometimes. Know what else? I’m musical now and so is Am-ee. Sumtimes after school and lunch we stay for music time. We sing and dance and clap and stomp. I like the stomp part best ’cept when I get to tinky, tinky, tinky round and round on the triangle. We learn lots of songs. Wanna hear my Easter song? I only ’member the last part.

Thank you, thank you pretty bunny pink ears
Here’s an Easter basket just for you!

**********

Schatzi is a mommie. She had 8 puppies. That’s more than my Mommie. We only have three. No not puppies you silly wombats, two sisters and one big brother, that’s me Gabe. BTW have you noticed I can say brother now and even Father Mike? That’s cuz I’m four years old now.

We got to keep one of the boy puppies. Me and Elle and Heidi named him Bear. Papa did a squinchy laugh and said that was a perfect name. Bear has a white foot and a little white spot on his tummy. I’m glad Schatzi got to keep one of her puppies ‘cept I think she was wery happy when they started eating from the bowl and not her cuz know what? They have sharp little baby puppy teeth. Ouch! Poor Schatzi.

Then Mommie took her to the vet hostible and she got spaded so she can’t have any more puppies. I asked Mommie if she was spaded and she said no so I guess we’ll be getting another baby sometime. It better be a boy. These girls are wery hard to boss.


Yes! by Schatzi

I have fulfilled my doggy mission in life. I have single-handedly increased the Newfie population by 8 and I did it while lying in a wooden box, albeit a very well constructed, sturdy, comfortable one, in the kitchen. And My Woman and My Man were over the moon about hospital-born, doctor-assisted twins! Hrumpf!

Now about my so-called husband…what a joke! Oh not that he wasn’t good looking, but finesse? Forget it. Why he didn’t even offer to buy me a drink first! It was wham, bam, thank you ma’am…well not really that quick but you know what I mean. Where’s the courtship? Where’s the romance? Where’s the pillow talk? (Can you tell who’s been watching those old late night movies with My Woman when My Man is gone?)

**********

Have you heard of that saying, ‘Elephants never forget’? Well neither do dogs. I mean I might have overlooked that first misstep when My Man effectively ended any hope of a romantic interlude for poor Schatzi, but to permanently end my love life goes beyond the pale.

However I am exacting my revenge. Oh don’t worry I’m being very subtle, just a little underwear stealing now and then, a few well-planned crotch ‘hellos’, or on special occasions laying near their feet and expelling much gas. You know; the usual thing.

But the other night I just couldn’t help myself. You see they think I’m too huge, too robust if you will, to jump up on their bed. Surprise! I knew it was perfect timing. You sure wouldn’t need a dog’s keen sense of hearing to realize there was a whole lotta hanky-pankying going on and wery little scrubba-dubbing. So I just hopped up, well it was more of a flying leap ackshully, and parked my big, beautiful body smack dab in the middle of the bed. Then here they come, My Man carrying My Woman. He was so busy doing that breathing into her mouth thing they do he didn’t even notice till it was too late. I mean what does he think she is a balloon for heaven’s sake? I smiled in triumph as his unibrow appeared. To his credit he did set My Woman down before he started chasing me and in three languages no less.

I know he’ll forgive me though. He always does.
Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you so much.


Decisions by The Twins

I still can’t see why Mommie has to put us in separate Australia’s, Noelle. I mean we don’t take up all that much room.

Duh! That’s the whole point. Keeping us apart so we’ll think about what we did. Don’t you ever even try to think like a grown-up, Heidi? Why must it always be me?

Well, I do sometimes. After all wasn’t I the one who found out from Gabe that Australia can be ANYWHERE? How scary is that?

Good point, little sister. And wasn’t it a good thing you found out before the little potty episode? Otherwise he might not have been so forthcoming about Australia

Well it served Gabe right if you ask me. I mean, trying to get us to pull our pants down and go potty outside behind the tree just because he does sometimes. How lazy is that?

I think it was just pure showing off. Might even smack of exhibitionism, purely my opinion though.

Well there is that, but honestly Noelle since we’ve matured I can see a little mellowing in Gabe. Most days he’s really fun to be with and you must admit he’s pretty much given up on bossing us.

OK, I’ll concede it was an honest mistake on his part but it’s too bad Papa got busted

Yeah, kinda like collateral damage.

Have you been watching the Military Channel again?

I might have been once or twice when I was playing Army with Gabe. I just can’t seem to recall.

But it was an innocent mistake. We weren’t even at the park that day when Gabe had a potty emergency and Papa took him behind the tree.

Mommie sure seemed surprised but I could have sworn I saw her start to smile. Then she had that sudden coughing attack and had to excuse herself. Seemed a bit too convenient for me.

Oh well, that’s water under the bridge, snow off the mountain, boots on the boot warmers, fire in the…

Will you stop trying to impress everybody with your superior language skills because they aren’t. The readers get the picture. They know we’re here at the chalet in Switzerland. Didn’t you read Papa’s blog? Oh that right we can’t read yet.

Well anyway we’re having lots of fun here this year, aren’t we Heidi, especially since we can go in the hot tub now that we’re wearing our big girl panties.

You got that right Noelle. It’s almost as much fun as watching Gabe’s reaction. I’ve never knew a human’s bottom lip could stick out that far.

Kinda reminds me of that chimp we saw at the zo. Only the chimp was way better.

Mommie and Papa do call him Monkey Man. He, he, he.

Heidi, you crack me up sometimes.

Only sometimes? I must be slipping. Seriously though, as big brothers go it could be worse…a lot worse. Think about it. How’d you like to be stuck with Jeremy or Robert as a big brother? Yuck! At least Gabe isn’t crying or bopping us on the head with toys all the time like those goofballs in our playgroup.

I agree totally there Thelma. I think we need to have a serious talk with Miss Hardcastle when we get back. I honestly don’t think they should allow boys in the playgroup till they’re at least 4. Until then their social skills are positively primitive.

Why did you just call me Thelma? It’s because of the ski thingy isn’t it Louise? OK, so I was a little miffed that I couldn’t go with Gabe for ski lessons. Look, I agreed to the ice skating and even enjoyed the slipping, sliding, and falling but I don’t want to be a never-ever. I want to be out there schussing down the slopes on the milk run with Gabe and Papa.

You’ve been eavesdropping on the grown-up skiers again haven’t you Thelma? Fair enough. OK, little sister you can be the skiing twin in your cute little pink snowsuit and goggles and I’ll be the ice-skating twin in my cute little twirly short skirt and tights. Agreed?

Agreed. It makes it so much easier to get these little matters sorted out early in life.

Absolutely Thelma. Now about who gets married first…

I love you Louise but don’t push your luck.




Buhler Family Blog #21
January 1, 2012


Testing 1,2 by Urs

“Mein Gott! Susanna. What ever possessed Monsignor Mike to send a dozen tin whistles to the children for Christmas? Does he think we are rabbits or perhaps this is his way of giving us a glimpse of hell on earth? And will you please quit grinning? You’re just encouraging them.”

“Alright, alright, Gabe, Heidi, Noelle, Karl, music time is over. See what your cousins are doing? Tin whistles back in the box please and I’ll bet if you all follow Lara downstairs to the kitchen and ask nicely, James will make you hot chocolate.”

“And don’t forget to say the magic word…PLEASE.”

“Thank you for reminding us all Noelle.”

“Koo-kee, koo-kee.”

“Ja, Karl. You can have a cookie. Girls, hold his hand please.”

“No! Gabe.”

“Ja, Karl, c’mon. Now remember what we do to get lots of cookies.”

“Susanna, did you see that? Karl’s first blinky wink!”

“Give me strength! Those two should have a warning label.”

“Hey what about me?”

“You most of all, Rabbit Man. Now how about rescuing poor James before he faints dead away from an overdose of Buhler charisma?”

**********

Need I say more about why it’s been awhile since the last blog? BTW you’ll notice we are now called Mami and Papi. You’ll soon see why.

We’ll start with home news. We have another son, happily brought into the world by our new Dr. Kienholz, a proud and tearfully-amazed Papi, and a crying, joyous, and I’m sure grateful Mami, since we’d only checked into the hospital two hours earlier. We named our lusty, 8 lb. baritone Karl Hans after my father.

Although each of the other children’s births were unforgettable in their own way, as I held Karl in my arms and watched his tiny chest rise and fall with his first breaths I felt such a sense of rightness…of coming home. Karl was our first child to be born on Swiss soil, September 23, 2010.

**********

After Susanna got pregnant we decided it was time for the children to have the advantages of living in Switzerland. I wanted them to feel the closeness of a large extended family and get to be with their cousins more than a few times a year. Susanna was also very keen on them learning to speak several languages and experience different cultures.

I teased her it was all about the Brown Swiss but I must admit in the year and a half we’ve lived here she’s dragged us to more markets, celebrations, and festivals than I’d been to in my whole entire life. She’s absolutely fearless. If I’m gone she’ll usually find Petra, Elke, or one of the mothers from church to go along. They’ll load up the Audi wagon with the children and take off. Mami just smiles and nods appreciatively. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s been giving her suggestions.

We were very fortunate to find a great house on the outskirts of Luzern. Susanna loved it on sight; I think it was the thatched roof that sold her and I loved the idea of having space for the children to play and explore. I always imagined going for walks with them just as my father had done, teaching them about the animals and plants. It has five bedrooms and a huge farmhouse kitchen where everyone seems to congregate of course.

………………...............………………………………

This past summer we added a couple more bedrooms with bathrooms and a sunroom off the back. We were afraid Nanny T wouldn’t want to move but she insisted she’d have been devastated if we hadn’t included her. Her husband, Denis had six months to finish out in England before he was eligible for early retirement but by the time he arrived Hilda had their little cottage on the property all ready for them. Of course the children consider her part of the family so there was no question of her not coming with us just like Schatzi and Bear. As Gabe told her, “When I’m all growed up like Papi you can take care of my babies.” What a thought! If only he could stay my little boy forever.

Just the other night it was Susanna’s turn for his bedtime story. As I got to his door to kiss him goodnight I stopped in my tracks.

“God if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a wery good time like I am. Amen.”

As I tucked him in tight, “Arms in or out?”

“In, Papi.”

I bent down for his strangle hold tight hug and a kiss and offered up my own prayer: ‘Thank you, Lord for this wery best time in my life with my family. Amen.’

**********

Our second CD of this contract was released just in time for Christmas so we worked up until the last minute promoting it. We’ll be back on the road again next week and won’t get a break until almost the end of February. Then we do a two-week gig in Vegas around Easter and then about 3-4 concert venues per continent, have August-November off and come back for three Christmas concerts. I’m hoping Susanna and the children will be able to spend some time with me in Vegas so we can do some sightseeing but now that Gabe’s 6 and the twins are 4 we don’t like for them to be away from school too much. Luckily they all love school and think their teachers practically can walk on water. I’m sure if one of them said orange was blue they’d come home and try to convince us.

Last year we’d scheduled our time off for March April, May, and June. That gave David and Sandy a nice long honeymoon since they were married in New York at the end of March. Seb, Juli, Amelie, and René flew in from Paris where they now live and Carlos, Gavina and their beautiful little daughter Pilar Karlotta arrived from Madrid the same day we did.

All our children really got along well. Ackshully they seem to naturally form their own little playgroups: Gabe and Amelie, René, Noelle, and Heidi, and Pilar and Karl who’s only a few months younger than her. Between Nanny T and the hotel child minding service we didn’t worry a bit.

When Muz and John heard we were planning a quick visit with them and then spend a few days at Disney World after the wedding they volunteered to tag along. Of course we said yes. It’s not often babysitters fall from the sky. Thanks Muz and John for giving Nanny T a day free in the Magic Kingdom and Houdini and I several wery magical nights.

**********

Yea though I walk through the valley of death I shall fear no evil…except a sick wife, two sick children, two extremely well and energetic children, and no Nanny T. What a perfect commercial for birth control Gabe, Karl, and I would have made that fateful weekend in June. Even excited fans running up onstage couldn’t compare. At least they weren’t vomiting.

It had all started quite innocently at the beginning of the week with Karl’s cold that he quickly got over but not before sharing with Susanna who by Friday had developed a raging sinus infection. She’d gone to the doctor and gotten antibiotics. So what if she was medicated and sequestered in our room irrigating her nose, trying to stop who ever is throwing baseballs at her forehead, and attempting to perfect her fish out of water breathing technique. I can handle this.

“Papi I don’t feel good.”

“Tell Papi what’s wrong, Heidi.”

“I feel kinda sick in my tummy.”

Now what does Susanna do? Oh yes, the hand on the forehead temperature thing. I can handle this.

“I don’t feel so good either, Papi.”

“Noelle, I’m sure you’re just feeling sad that your sister doesn’t feel good. Right?”

Of course, it’s just empathy between them because they’re twins. I can handle this. I’ll just get Karl cleaned up, put him in his playpen and see what’s up with Heidi. Wrong choice of words there Urs.

“Gabe will you please come in here and play with Karl for a few minutes while I…”

“Papi Heidi just threw up and Noelle doesn’t look so good either. Hurry Elle, run to the bathroom. C’mon. Ewww! I mean that’s OK. At least you made it to the bathroom. Keep leaning over the toilet. I’ll be right back.”

“Oh no! Heidi. Is that all…I mean you’re so little. No don’t cry kleines. It will be fine. Come here. Let Papi wipe your face. Let’s rinse your mouth. Ja, now you will feel better. You sit over here while Papi…”

“Here’s a bowl Heidi if you get sick again. OK? Papi you look wery white. Maybe you better go outside and breathe good. That’s what Frau Bauman told Fraulein Schnieder to do when she looked like you the time Serge threw up all over our experiment. You’ll be good in a minute, Papi, just like Fraulein Schneider. Don’t worry about Elle. She’s got the toilet.”

“Well maybe just for a minute. Bear, stop that! C’mon Schatzi, both of you outside with me.”

The fresh air did help of course and in the meantime Gabe had called out the cavalry. By the time I had returned, Houdini had risen from her sickbed long enough to get the girls upstairs, dispose of their clothes and get them into the tub along with their prerequisite bowl, just in case. I dashed upstairs with Karl, deposited him unceremoniously in his bed and put Gabe in charge of entertaining him. Then I relieved Susanna who stumbled back to bed having diagnosed a probable stomach virus and imparted what pearls of wisdom she thought I’d need to see me through the crisis. Thank Gott Gabe was paying close attention.

Armed with disposable masks, rubber gloves, buckets, mops, disinfectant, a heavy-duty washing machine and a lot of flat ginger ale, I prepared to do battle. By Sunday my kind-hearted, strong-stomached firstborn and I had sailed the plague-infested wreck of the Buhlers safely into the calm harbor of health. During the height of the storm however, I must admit it felt more like we were the Titanic, slowly sinking into the murky depths yet never quite able to achieve that blessed state of oblivion; suddenly bobbing above the surface to confront yet another overpowering wave. Who was the idiot who started the rumor that women are the weaker sex?



Chalet Baby by Susanna

Yes, that’s what we call Karl…at least when we’re alone because according to our calculations he was conceived here at the chalet two years ago. We thought for sure we were home free without any teasing until Carlos’ gift arrived for his first Christmas. Leave it to him.


………................…………………………………

Then everybody got in on the act. So now we just tell them he’s Chalet Baby because he loves the snow. Well at least we aren’t lying about that. He’d stay out all day if we’d let him. I already predict all the cousins will be fighting to get him on their side for snowball fights next year and no snowman is safe when he’s around. Gabe doesn’t call him Destructo-Baby for nothing.

He’s the male version of my fearless adventurer Heidi. Thank goodness he follows Gabe around like a little shadow and not her. Otherwise I’d be pulling my hair out by the handful rather than just lamenting over the occasional gray ones that I find.

And he looks so cute and innocent too… the closest to Urs’ baby pictures. He’s the only one who has Urs’ eyes exactly and I mean exactly, that adorable little rosebud mouth, and the ability to make your heart go from 70 to 170 in 2.8 seconds. He climbs like one of those natives you see shimmying up the cocoanut palms with their machete to hack off cocoanuts and he’s yet to meet a door he didn’t like to open. I am NOT going to ask what’s next, because this baby has proven his ability to get into trouble already.

Just two months ago he gave us the scare of our life when he opened a sliding closet, somehow climbed up, got my pincushion and swallowed three straight pins, the kind with the pretty multicolored heads. I was making the bed when he came in and I could hear him chewing on something. I got him to open his mouth just in time to see them disappear. The other children were at school so we left Nanny here, grabbed him and headed for the emergency room. There we were telling them this cute little guy, sitting here happy as a clam, had swallowed pins. I felt like such a terrible parent.

X-rays confirmed there were indeed three pins and he was admitted to the hospital for observation. The surgeon confirmed that no vital organs were endangered and put him on a diet of bread, mashed potatoes, and bananas. The hospital was very lenient about letting us stay so Urs and I took turns with him night and day. As the pins moved through his digestive system they were tracked daily with x-rays until finally on the 3rd day he passed them and we took him home with no ill effects. We’ve never been so thankful in all our lives!

Now did this traumatize the poor wee tyke? Are you kidding? He became the pet of the ward. His bed was on the end near the hallway so he thought he was the official greeter. He’d been using his Tommie Tippy cup for several months but the first morning when I came back from getting some coffee, they’d given him a bottle of what looked like grape juice. Instead of drinking it, he’d turned it upside down and was using it like a bottle of catsup to brighten up his rather dull white sheets with purple polka dots.

**********

Then there was the weekend from hell last June. I had this horrendous sinus thing going on and the twins came down with a stomach bug. Poor Urs! At least Karl wasn’t sick and Gabe, bless his heart was a big help.

I couldn't eat a thing for two days and I was just fading, getting really weak and nauseous. Finally Sunday afternoon I felt good enough to eat a little something. Then comes Monday...the latest in Karl's Campaign of Destruction....

The other children were off to school and Urs has taken his bike out for some much needed R & R. After this weekend I’ll be lucky not to get a postcard from Poland. Nanny T had gone to the grocery. I may be feeling better but not that better. Maybe a little fresh air would do me good, just down to the mailbox and maybe sit in the sun in the backyard and watch Karl and the dogs play for a few minutes.

I have him on my back in his carrier. I go into the bathroom to put lip balm on ...my lips look like they've been torn up with forks, they are so chapped from all the mouth-breathing I've been doing.

There is Pepto-Bismol on the counter from earlier this morning, when I felt really nauseous after taking my antibiotic on a too-empty stomach. Karl swipes it somehow while I'm not looking, disarms the child-PROOF (ha!) top on it, and starts pouring it down my back, between our two bodies.

I don't feel anything, because I have on my insulated vest. But I look down and it looks like I'm bleeding pink. What the? Where is it coming from?

I look in the mirror and see Karl waving the now-empty bottle around. Destructo-Baby strikes again! So I have to take him off my back and out of the carrier, the BRAND NEW CARRIER that is now soaked in Pepto. My insulated vest is soaked in Pepto, as is my shirt and my jeans. His clothing is soaked too.

I'm thinking of inventing a playpen with a good strong lid that can be padlocked. He will scream his head off, but at least he won't be causing much mayhem.

**********

After putting so much time and effort into remodeling and redecorating our first home in London we just couldn’t part with it, yet it wouldn’t have been practical to keep it. I was telling Muz and Daddy how I felt and Daddy suggested looking into leasing it to a company for their executives with families. So now we have a three-year contract with UBS. We only took our favorite pieces of furniture, some of the children’s things and the Bösendorfer I gave Urs for his birthday before we were married. The best thing is whenever the lease comes up for renewal we have the option of going back for a few weeks; just long enough to visit with friends and take in some shows and concerts.

**********

It was wonderful seeing little Pilar in New York when we went to David and Sandy’s wedding. I can’t believe what a pretty baby she is. Carlos is going to be beside himself when she starts dating which will probably be about age 35 if he has his way. With those huge black eyes and long curly lashes, he’ll have to get a stick to beat the boys away. Did I mention that Elke and Franz’ daughter, Anna Louise will be 2 next month? I don’t even want to think about Karl at 2.

Oh and Gabe is taking piano lessons, but just between you and me I’ve seen him eying Urs’ guitar. No matter what Urs’ says, Heidi really does love her tin whistle from Monsignor Mike. She the only one who can play a recognizable tune…most of the time. Whenever he comes for a visit he teaches her a new song.

Noelle on the other hand decided she wants to play the violin after Urs got his old one down the other night and played during one of our impromptu music nights. We’ll see how she feels when she turns five next year. The children love it when we all ‘make music’ together, especially when I surprised them by playing the piano. As usual our Gabe summed it up perfectly. “Just like we listened to at school Mami, Overature in the Miners.”



At Last by Gabe

Finally! I have my very own little brother, Karl Hans and know what? He picked me to be his best friend, not the Bossy sisters. That’s what we call them cuz they still try to boss us but now we have a chance: two boys against two girls.

Know what else? Karl follows me around everyday and everyday. He’s a little copycat. He tries to do everything I do ’cept sumtimes I don’t want him to. Mostly it’s OK though.

Papi and I taught him how to shave like us big boys. I’m so big I don’t need to stand on my little stool to shave so I gave it to him. I help him do the foamy stuff on his face cuz he’s still wery messy. I say, “No you silly wombat brother. You’re holding the wrong end of the razor. Watch me.” Then I show him how to shave, just like Papi showed me when I was a little boy.

Everyday and everyday Karl is wanting to know about stuff. His favorite things to know are: What if, What for, and Why. One day when we were shaving it musta been a ‘What for?’ day.

“Papi what for?”

Papi kept shaving and looked over. “Those are eyelashes to keep dirt and dust out of your eyes.”

“Papi what for?”

Papa kept shaving and looked over. “That’s your belly button. That is where you were attached to Mami in her tummy before you were born.”

“Papi what for?”

Papi kept shaving and looked over. Papi stopped shaving. Too late. There’s the blood. “That’s your …uh that’s to go to the toilet and make babies.”

I guess Papi forgot it was a penis so I reminded him. Thank goodness Mami remembered when I asked her. I might need to remember for Karl though cuz he’s still wery little.

**********

Mommy takes us on mystery trips. Papi says that’s cuz it’s a mystery how she finds all these places to go. Sumtimes we go with my cousins Luca and Jakob and sumtimes we go with Auntie Elke and Anna Louise. She’s little as Karl. One time even Grandmami went. It’s the best when Papi goes though.

We went to see the cows go up to the mountains to eat the summer grass. They had flowers in their hair just like when Auntie Elke got married and I was the ring boy. Once we went to the onion market. I didn’t like that so much. It was wery stinky.

**********

Mommie and Papa have new names. Did you know that? It’s cuz we live in Switzerland now. They’ve turned into Mami and Papi ’cept they act the same. Did you know Switzerland ’stralia is even worse than England? That’s cuz it’s much funner here. We go skiing not just at Christmas and it snows even at our house! When it’s summer we have miles and miles of grass to play in and we have a forest even with little aminals if you’re wery quiet. I have a bike and it can go in the mountains and I have to wear my helmet like Papi every time. That’s the rule. If you’re in ’stralia in Switzerland you miss out on even more funner stuff. I’m getting wery good about not visiting ’stralia. Karl isn’t so good

**********

Know what? I have the bestest Papi in the whole world. Know why? Cuz he loves me wery, wery much and I love him even more.

One morning I woke myself up wery early. It was even dark outside my window. I looked on my chair. No school clothes laid out to put on. Yeah!

I told myself to fix a surprise breakfast for everybody: pancakes, my favorite. First I got a big bowl and a spoon. I pulled a chair to the counter so I could get the flour jar. It was wery heavy.

Oops, spilled some on the floor. That’s OK. I just scooped most of it in the bowl with my two hands, ’cept here comes Bear to help me cook. “No Bear! Stay away!” Too late. Bear prints, oh well. Did you know jammies are wery good for wiping flour off your hands?

Then it was time for the milk. I gave it a stir, stir, stir with the big wooden spoon. Now for the eggs. Oh, I ‘most forgot the most important thing…sugar, lots and lots of sugar. Papi and I like our pancakes wery sweet.

It was when I reached for the sugar jar that it happened. That silly carton of eggs just bumped my arm and did a oops right down to the floor. Did I tell you our floor is wery hard?

Then I had another oops…me. You see it was like this. Bear was helping me clean up the eggs on the floor when I had a slipping accident. Boom! What a mess! Now Bear and I are white AND sticky. I wanted to do something wery good for Mami and Papi and Karl and even Elle and Heidi but it was getting wery bad.

Just then I saw Papi standing in the door…watching. My eyes got big tears cuz all I wanted to do was something good but I knew I’d made a wery bad mess. I knew he would be wery mad, send me to ’stralia for sure and maybe even spank me. But he just stayed there watching and I stayed in my mess crying.

Then you know what my Papi did? He walked through my mess with his bare feet and picked me up and hugged me and loved me. He didn’t even care that my hug was white and sticky! He just loved me.

Then he set me down in a clean spot. “Let’s get this mess cleaned up Gabe. We have pancakes to make and I’m wery hungry.”

“I love you Papi.”

“I love you too Gabe, even when you’re a mess.”

**********

One more thing I want to tell you: I am finally the boss of somebody, Karl. Mostly when I want him to do stuff I don’t tell him like the Bossy sisters cuz he’ll just say, “No, no, no!” I just pretend I’m not looking at him and then I go do what I want him to do and know what? He starts copying me! Isn’t that a wonderful secret? Sometimes you don’t need words to be the boss. Please don’t tell the Bossy sisters.



Hi There by Bear


Mom’s taking a little nap right now so I decided to stop by and introduce myself. I’m Bear, just a lovable, cuddly, 2 year old puppy. Since I’m a boy I weigh a little more than mom, 140 lb. but I am a growing boy you know. And speaking of growing, sometimes My Family will come home with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, and even half a cow. They’re the greatest hunters on earth!

As all dogs know it is our Family's job to provide us with plenty of proper nourishment. Unfortunately, our Family and we often have conflicting ideas of what constitutes "proper nourishment." Remember the following, if you don't want to spend your whole life eating nothing but Purina Dog Chow.

Anything your Family is eating is preferable to anything they have put into your dish.

“What Mom? Yes I remember: My head does not belong in the refrigerator. But would you please just answer this one question? Is Camembert cheese dead, or just really sick?”

**********

Mom and I love living here in the wilds of Switzerland. The woods and the tall grass are wonderful of course but when we saw the trickling streams, the mirror-like ponds, the deep mountain lakes, and rushing rivers it was all we could do to keep our webbed feet from bursting into song: “The Hills Are Alive”.

Then there’s the snow. We love snow whether it’s jumping in it, rolling in it, or eating it. However, the joy of this snowy season is not without price. They have a holiday season called Christmas that causes My Family to behave very strangely. Luckily I learned at my mother’s knee how to cope with this phenomenon and having recently lived through my second such period, I’d like to give you a few tips. Yes I know you’re not dogs but I’m sure if you stretch your imaginations you’ll find something applicable.

Bear’s Christmas Etiquette

Be tolerant if your Family puts decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.

They may bring a large fragrant tree into the house, set it up in a prominent place, and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your Family, so there are some things you need to know:

- Don't pee on the tree
- Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree.
- Mind your tail when you are near the tree.
- If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open.
- Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the wall to the tree.

As you can see Christmas came…and I didn’t know how to get out of its way.

....................................................................…………………..


A Walk by The Twins

I see most everybody has told you about us living in Switzerland, which we both love BTW, so we wanted to tell you about Disney World.

It was so fun because Grandmuz and Grandpa John even came and sometimes they went on the rides. The only thing was Grandmuz is very clean. I mean that in a good way of course, but golly she must have stock in those wet wipey things.

I counted and we used up three boxes…in just one week. I think that smacks a bit of OCD if you ask me.

OK enough of the wiping Heidi, besides most of those wipes got used on poor Karl. He hasn’t learned to move fast enough yet. Let’s get on to the fun stuff. My favorite thing was the Festival of the Lion King and Cinderella’s Castle and…

Splash Mountain. Remember how we had to stand on our tippy-toes to be tall enough? And we never played miniature golf before…

And I’m never playing again if Karl’s there. I mean it took absolutely FOREVER to get done with him stealing the balls from the little hole. Maybe those people in front of us thought it was cute but we have to live with him day in and day out.

Now Noelle, you could cut him some slack you know. After all you were a kid once too. I seem to recall you setting the table for our dolls with Mami’s good china. Not exactly one of your shining moments.

Oh yes, I must have completely blocked that from my mind. But you have to admit Heidi most of my social gaffs have been in private. I mean why couldn’t we at least had the foresight to save ‘Nemo and Friends’ until the last day.

But it was his favorite. At least Mami and Papi were taking Gabe on the Test Track that time so they didn’t see it. Besides, Grandmuz and Grandpa John are grandparents so nothing embarrasses them. They just think everything we do is cute.

Well it may have been at the time but from then on it was “Ne-mo, Ne-mo, Ne-mo,” everywhere we went. I totally wanted to hide. Why do you think I wore my sunglasses day and night?

I know this will come as a shock but I don’t think any of your public recognized you, Miss Drama Queen. Actually it made me think of that scene in ‘Quo Vadis’ where Deborah Kerr is tied on the horns of this raging bull in the Coliseum and Robert Taylor dressed as a Christian gladiator comes into the arena to save her. I can just hear the cheering crowd chanting, “Ne-mo, Ne-mo, Ne-mo.”

Heidi I swear if you don’t stop watching those old movies I’m going to tell Mami. Talk about Drama Queens!

The parade down Main Street was fun wasn’t it? And we girls got to hang out together and Grandpa John and Papi got the boys. That was great.

You know Heldi, we might have Papi wound around our little fingers and love him to pieces but you gotta admit our Mami is way cool. He’s really lucky he has her.

You can say that again, Noelle. Remember when we were just walkin’ along Main Street there and you found that penny and picked it up? I thought Mami would go ballistic.

“Eww! Noelle don’t put that in your mouth.”

Yeah, she took it right away from me and when I asked her why she just said, "Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's been, it's dirty, and probably has germs.”

I can still see you looking at her with total admiration when you asked, "Mami, how do you know all this stuff, you are so smart."

"All moms know this stuff. It's on a Mami Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mami."

Wow! A Mami Test. Now why didn’t we think of that?

I’d say the fact that we’re only four might have something to do with it, Noelle dear.

Be that as it may, Heidi , I must give you full marks for being the first to figure it out.

Elementary my dear Watson, but thank you just the same. (I know I’m going to adore reading Sherlock Holmes as soon as I know a few more bigger words.)
Actually it couldn’t be simpler. If you don’t pass the Mami Test you have to be the Papi.

“Exactly,” Mami smiled and we all did high fives. What a Mami!

Buhler Family Blog #22
January 1, 2017



Surprise! by Urs

Tadpole, it's not time yet to nag you about Universitat (though I have some thoughts on that). For now, enjoy the delicious, warmth of your Mami’s womb. Do some rolls and somersaults while there’s still room. For now, may your toes blossom, your fingers lengthen, and your already booming heart expand. I'm waiting. It's me, Papi. I'm out here. You already know where Mami is. I hope my voice will be the first one you hear when you arrive. You'll recognize me — I'll be the grinning, delighted guy with curly hair, and I'll have your nose.

**********

Yes, Houdini and I have once again pulled the proverbial rabbit out of the hat. In fact there’ve been two since the last time you heard from us, but more of that in a minute. We are expecting our seventh and last addition to the Buhler family in June. Well I did promise her less than 20 children. Ackshully we hadn’t planned on this new little one but that will make he/she even more special.

Susanna, Noelle, and Heidi are campaigning for a girl, Karl and the younger boys just ‘know’ it will be a boy. Gabe alternates between happy excitement and total embarrassment since he turned 11 and he and I had THE TALK; one son down, three to go. When I told Papi he just laughed and said, “Ja Urs, it will get easier.” Please Gott let the new one be a girl!

**********

Now I imagine you want to know about the two youngest. Matthew Peter had his first birthday on October 30th. I teased Houdini that it’s a good thing we’re living in Switzerland now, otherwise I’d have been in charge of taking the children trick or treating. Halloween is not a big deal over here but we do carve a pumpkin for each of the children. This year I let Gabe and the twins, who are 9, carve their own…outside. I’ve learned a lot since I’ve become a Papi.

Matthew is the Buhler official meeter and greeter. If he doesn’t become the linguist of the family it won’t be for lack of trying. He’s never met a person or animal he didn’t like to talk or sing to; so at least he comes by his nickname of ‘motor mouth’ honestly. Naturally his brothers feel this calls for an automatic “vroom vroom” sending them all into fits of laughter.

Then we have Jon Willem, named after Grandpa John. He’ll be four in April. He’s our other leftie, just like his namesake and Gabe. I don’t know if it’s a case of the tail wagging the dog or not but Jon seems to be as crazy about golf as Grandpa John. In fact, that was one of his prerequisites when he retired: a house on a golf course. Jon would even rather be ‘playing golf’ with the little set of clubs John made for him than go to the pool. So would Gabe for that matter, but I suspect that’s because Grandpa lets him drive the golf cart. Let’s just keep that part to ourselves if you don’t mind. Susanna would just worry.

**********

In their Swiss school Gabe, Noelle, and Heidi are trained to do Kopfrechnen or calculations in their heads, where the only thing they write down is the answer. Now you would think that they’d understand that two equals two, however, two minutes of tizzying seems to last 20 times as long as two minutes of quiet time…at least when Noelle is the tizzier. Oh no, there I go again speaking Susannaese.

Just this weekend, she was having a tizzy because she’d left her favorite, absolutely must-have, ice-skating skirt at home. From what I could gather in the midst of her meltdown, her outfit not matching was akin to…what was it, oh yes, “ It’s worse than you running out of chocolate, Papi!” I calmly reminded her at least I do not stomp and pointed the way to Australia. She flounced over to the chair and plopped down heavily.

"What a Drama Queen we have on our hands," I whispered behind my newspaper as I rejoined Susanna on the sofa.

"Papi, I’m not a queen, I’m a princess. Get it right."

I just shook my head and smiled, behind the paper of course. Even when she’s being a royal pain she can make me smile. It was a much more polite and agreeable, if mismatched, Noelle who arrived wery late to her ice skating class.

**********

Il Divo looks very different now that our contract is up. In some ways each of us has gone back to our old life…only a new and improved version. Just as our families have grown so have our musical interests and ambitions.

In addition to Pilar, Carlos and Gavina now have a 4 year-old daughter Paloma Mirella, and a son Juan Alejandro who will be 2 this month. Carlos’ eyebrows practically tango when he talks about mi hijo. He is not only busy on stage but also has performed in some televised opera productions. He and Gavina have done one long-term stage production together in addition to her recording another album. He still insists live performance is better and he should know with his larger than life persona. From what I can tell, Pilar has inherited his vivacious personality if not his musical ability.

With Amelie 10 now and René 7, Juli has gone back to her travel agency three days a week. Seb does a few gigs from time to time in Paris, but has mainly returned to his beloved composing and is now writing a movie score.

David, the last holdout, has joined the ranks of the Il Divo fatherhood with a beautiful blonde, blue-eyed daughter Laci Camille who is now three and almost as tall as Jon. Well I guess that’s to be expected since they both have a few inches on Susanna and me. Sandy is back with her singing group after taking off six months after Laci was born. David limits himself to a 6-month opera contract so he can work on other projects, especially producing movies.

We were teasing Seb just last summer when all the guys and their families were here visiting at our annual get together. Seb could write the score, Carlos and I could perform, and David could produce.

Ackshully we have done a few planned performances together each year just to keep our hand in so to speak…well alright we confess. We just can’t quit cold turkey. We have too much fun together on stage. What can I say? We’ve been doing a week or two each summer in Vegas and one concert a year in London, New York, Sydney, Tokyo, and South America. David came up with the idea of doing four Christmas concerts in December next year in each of our home countries , New York, Paris, Madrid, and Zurich so we’ll be looking into that.

I try to do either Bach’s St. Matthew or St. John’s Passion during Easter each year and this past Christmas I did the Christmas Oratorio which has a brilliant aria for tenor with flute and bass with trumpet. I’m also happy to say I’ve finally grown into several roles I’ve been waiting for, namely, Florestan in Fidelio, Tristan, and next year I am thrilled to be doing Siegfried, arguably the keystone of any heldentenor’s repertoire.



The New and the Unexpected by Susanna

I remember with Gabe I began wearing maternity clothes as soon as my OB/GYN confirmed my pregnancy. By the time it got to Jon I wore my regular clothes for as long as possible. Now it feels like my maternity clothes are my regular clothes. Still when I pack them away for the last time I know it will be with a contented yet wistful sigh. Our Buhler brood will be complete.

If Urs and I have learned nothing else since we started our family, it’s to delight in the unexpected. Neither of us can quite explain it, but the gift of this new little life has filled us with an even greater feeling of love, joy, and welcome because it wasn’t planned.

**********

With Urs’ genes I guess it was inevitable that we’d wind up with at least one ‘rocker’ in the family and Matthew Peter is the one. You should see him ‘dance’ and ‘sing’ when Urs plays his guitar. His little hunkus is just wiggling and bouncing to beat the band and now his Papi and older brothers are teaching him to play air guitar. I’ve already laid down the law: no leather pants. Oh and so far it looks like he’s the only one who has inherited Urs’ dimples.

I am counting on him being in big boy pants by the time the baby comes in June. He’ll only be 20 months then but I’m trying a new technique I’ve read about on the Internet. I’ve been putting him on the potty first thing in the morning and after naps from the time he was only a few months old to get him used to it. In a couple of months I’m switching him to cloth diapers to make him more aware and uncomfortable when he’s wet. Wish me luck.

Jon Willem is a delight, especially to Daddy. Oh he’s besotted with all his grandchildren of course, but there’s just this special affinity he and Jon seem to have for each other. I see them together and think, ‘That is how it would have been if I had had a brother.’ I still remember growing up with the only father around who was a Boy Scout leader for years but didn’t have a son.

I close my eyes and I can hear Daddy and Jon laying on the bed and talking when we were there this past Thanksgiving. Jon doesn’t usually nap but we insist he have some quiet time. He’d persuaded Grandpa John that he needed some quiet time too.

“Grandpa tell me ‘bout when you were a boy like me.”

“Well, Jon, I had curly hair just like you.”

“You did? We all have curly hair, ’cept Mami and Noelle and Karl. They got lesser curls.”

“Would you like to know a secret?”

“Oh yes, Grandpa, super please!”

“Well, I didn’t like my curly hair when I was a boy so at night I used to wear my mother’s stocking on my head to straighten it.”

“You’re a silly wombat, Grandpa! Look you still got curly hair.”

“Yep, you’re right there, Jon and know what else? I’m so glad it didn’t work because I love having curly hair just like you.”

“Me too, Grandpa. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

”I love you 3.”

”I love you more.”

**********

We have a new disease running rampant around the Buhler house and I for one couldn’t be happier. Karl is the latest one to come down with riddle disease. He’s become consumed with riddles and tells them endlessly—driving both Urs and I nuts in the process and I love it! Yes our little boy is developing a sense of humor. Perhaps it is in the genes, at least from mother to son. He can genuinely share a laugh with us now. For the first time in a his life, he gets to be the one who has the answer—who possesses a bit of knowledge that parents or other kids do not have.

Why do giraffes have long necks?
So they don't smell their stinky feet.

(You should have seen Bag Boy blanch when he heard this one. I don’t think he’ll every get over his giraffeaphobia!)

What cake can you drink coffee from?
A cup cake.

I have been waiting soooo long for him to ‘get’ my brand of humor and join in the fun with Gabe and I. Usually the girls just roll their eyes and groan at us but now I have Karl as an ally.

Still the special connection that Gabe and I share will be hard to beat. I think that’s why everyone refuses to play games like Pictionary or Guesstures with us as a team. We seem to have this uncanny ability to understand what each other is thinking. For instance, sometimes when Urs has an attack of uber Swissness, all Gabe and I need to do is look at each other and we’ll make horns on our heads with our fingers ala the ‘Horns of Nimon” from Dr. Who, a sci-fi hero from British telly. (of course we wait until Urs isn’t looking, it wouldn’t do for mother and son to be sent to Australia.)



A Sister, a Brother, and a Baby by Gabe

Sorry I did it, Heidi, but you really shouldn’t of said that. I mean you could have damaged Karl’s little psyche. It’s a good thing he has a big brother like me to stick up for him.

Here he’s finally getting smart enough to understand that words have two meanings. All the poor kid wanted to do was tell you a riddle…

“What do you call a kid that is good, but breaks things?”

…but no, you had to jump in and answer, “Karl,” just as he was about to say, “smashing,” and ruin the punch line. Ha ha ha, get it? Punch line.

Memo to self: If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.

**********

Did I tell you Karl is skiing now, in fact he’s almost as good as Mami but then she doesn’t get much chance to practice, especially now that she’s going to have another baby.

I imagine Papi already told you about the new baby. Usually when they tell us, they both are just happy and excited but this time they seemed surprised. I don’t know why. It’s not like you can plan them…at least I don’t remember him saying anything about that when we had THE TALK. I sure hope he isn’t planning THE TALK Part 2. I’m not sure he could get through it.

Growing up with babies around all the time and being the oldest I already knew a lot, but personally I think Mami is a little old to be having another baby something or other…and so am I. How embarrassing, thinking about Mami and Papi…you know ewwww!

I figured I was in for a whole lot of teasing at school when the news got out, but the guys were pretty cool with it, maybe because with our large family they figure it’s just a natural occurrence, like animals migrating or leap year. I have to tell you one of the unexpected benefits though was the girls’ reaction. They were ‘oohing’ and ‘awing’ all over the place. Who knew they’d be so interested in a new baby or its older brother?

Maybe I should rethink that idea of Mami being too old. On the other hand I’d still like to believe my blinky-wink might have had something to do with it. Just in case this really is the last Buhler baby I’d better keep practicing.

**********

Karl is turning out to be a pretty fun kid to hang out with at home even though he’s a lot younger. We’re both into science and now that he’s big enough I can take him with me when I explore in the woods. Herr Haupt, my science and maths teacher is the best. If Karl gets in his class in a few years Herr Haupt will think he’s brilliant because I’m teaching Karl everything I know. I haven’t told anyone yet but I’m thinking it might be fun to be a science teacher just like Herr Haupt.

When Papi takes us exploring in the ‘forest’, that’s what he calls it, Karl is fine but when it’s only me and Karl there’s one tiny problem, well two ackshully. First of all when we’re exploring for animals he sometimes forgets we need to be quiet. I love him but he has the loudest whisper you’ve ever heard.

Then there’s the problem when we do find some animals. You see I understand how to observe them in their natural habitat, thanks to Herr Haupt. Karl also likes to observe them…after he grabs them. You wouldn’t believe how patiently he can sit watching a vole’s hole.

Fortunately most animals are quicker than Karl, except for the insects. Sometimes it can be wery hard to convince him they don’t need to come home for show and tell. Mami has gotten better about handling them, but she’s still not wery keen on spiders. Oh, and the rule is they have to be in a jar to come in the house.

Sometimes Karl and I bring home animals that we rescue. Like one time we found a baby duck that got lost from his Mami and you wouldn’t believe all the lost kittens we’ve found. We have to ask Mami and Papi if it’s OK first. Even Schatzi and Bear have to say OK by not growling at them or eating them…although there was that one time. I thought that frog was a goner for sure but Bear didn’t actually bite him. I think he just wanted to lick him and the frog wouldn’t hold still. We never had a problem with Bear and frogs after that.



Pondering by Schatzi

Hi everybody. Bear is a little under the weather today; nothing serious, just an upset tummy. Serves him right if you ask me. I mean how many times does a mother have to say, “You do not put things in your mouth that you pick up off the ground.” I say good for that frog. Maybe that son of mine will think next time. Honestly!

***********

I’ve been pondering lately. Might be cuz I’m slowing down a bit these days. I’m nearly 70 in people years and that gets a dog to pondering. You know I think it was fate, My Family and Newfies that is. Think about it. Can you imagine a pompous standard French poodle carefully picking its way amongst a minefield of toys cars, play dough, and action figures? Or sitting patiently under a high chair to be baptized by runny oatmeal and bits of squished orange sections? They’d probably develop some nervous tic or skin allergy.

What about a nice Australian Shepherd? They’re good with children you say. Their doggie hearts might be thinking children but one glimpse at all those curly heads and their doggie brain would be screaming sheep. The next time you watch those sheep herding trials just imagine the flock of sheep chasing the dog. Enough said. He’d be packing his tucker bag faster than you could say Waltzing Mathilda.

Which leaves us, the perfect choice. Our easy-going personality and gentle temperament plus the energetic, loving, ever-growing Buhlers: a match made in Heaven. And they’re so thoughtful, making sure not only our magnificent bodies are exercised, but also our brains by providing us with a steady stream of Boys and Girls to train. Having been through six Little Peepul now nothing fazes us. Kittens, hedgehogs, owls, squirrels, rabbits, ducks, bring ’em on. We won’t even twitch.

.............................................................……………....................…………………….

So until the next time I’d like to leave you with a bit of advice: Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level.



All Spiced Up by The Twins

So Heidi what are the odds of this one being a girl?

Oh I’d say about 4-2. You know this being outnumbered by the boys really sucks.

Not much we can do about it now. I figure being pregnant is kinda like when you go to get married and you’re standing there at the back of the church just waiting to take that walk down the aisle. Once you step on that white cloth and the music’s playing there’s no turning back.

You don’t suppose Mami and Papi would entertain the idea of…

You’ve got to be kidding. Do you know how old Mami is? 40! I mean that’s practically old enough to be a Grandmami for Pete’s sake.

Well if Mami’s so OLD like you said she’ll really need our help with this baby then won’t she?

Hold on now baby sister. I just meant she’s probably too old to have any more babies, not too old to take care of the ones she already has. Besides if this new one is anything like Matt, forget it. Remember the last time Mami asked us to get him into his snowsuit?

Unfortunately I do Noelle. It was like trying to stuff one large, unhappy, live octopus into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

At least once he’s out in the snow he’ll stay there forever, not like Jon. Five minutes after he hits the cold it’s, “Mami, ich muess go bisle!” (I have to pee.) What is it with boys?

It’s just that their insides are on the outside , Louise. They can’t help it if they’re the weaker sex, poor things.

Well I’m just glad that I can escape to the ice rink. I’m really getting quite good with my twirls you know and I absolutely love how my skirt stands out when I spin.

That wouldn’t be your favorite pink skirt you left at home now would it Louise?

I’d rather not discuss it, Thelma if you please.

I’m sure you wouldn’t Louise, especially after you practically brought the house down with your tizzy. I must admit the way you slammed your butt down in the chair with your arms folded rated a 10 in my book. Too bad Papi couldn’t see it behind the paper.

I don’t understand why you’d rather be sliding down some old hill dodging trees and jumping over bumps rather than gliding gracefully around the rink, Thelma.

I do not slide, Louise, I schuss and traverse thank you very much and besides Gabe says my stem Christies are looking better every day.

Well I don’t know why you’d believe anything he’d tell you, Thelma. Remember what he told us about being born? It sure doesn't sound right to me.

I think he was just winding us up, Louise and we really get along now that I don’t try to boss him. Besides he didn’t even say anything about my coffeecake.

Ah yes, your famous or shall I say infamous peach kuchen. Really, I think everyone was just rendered speechless by the ‘tastiness’ of it.

All right, all right, stop laughing Louise. It was just one tiny mistake. How was I to know one tablespoon of nutmeg would make that much difference? Anyway Papi liked it.

I believe the comment he managed to choke out, Thelma, was, “Wery pungent, Heidi, ja, wery pungent,” and then he downed his coffee in one gulp if I’m not mistaken.

Well if it was so terrible then why did you have two pieces, Louise?

That’s a no-brainer, Heidi. I love you …and I’m also very fond of nutmeg.

Thanks, Noelle, I love you too.



TISSUE WARNING!!

Buhler Family Blog #23
January 1, 2022

Surprising Developments by Urs

How good--to be alive!
How infinite--to be
Alive--two-fold--The Birth I had
And this--besides, in--Thee!
Emily Dickinson

Can you imagine the inexpressible joy of holding a life in your hands? That wondrous privilege was mine…quite unexpectedly.


Houdini had been in nesting mode for two days and even the children recognized the signs. It wouldn’t be long before they had a new brother or sister. Poor Houdini. Gabe and the twins were tripping over each other to pamper her while Karl and Jon were watching her like she was some kind of scientific experiment set to explode any minute. Blissfully unaware, all Matt wanted to do was demonstrate his recently acquired Cheerio accuracy to everyone, whether human or canine.

Her contractions started just before daybreak so Nanny T and I got the children off to school. By noon we were at the hospital.

“You may go back in now, Urs. She’s at 9 cm. I’ve just broken her water. It won’t be long now, but then you’re getting to be an expert at this, eh?” Dr. Kienholz laughed.

I was just choosing the next CD when Houdini chose to be magical.

“Urs, I need you.”

“I’m here, Susanna.”

“No I mean HERE. This baby is coming NOW you stupid wombat!”

“Are you sure? Maybe you made a mistake. Uh-oh, no mistake. I can see the top of the head.”

“Wait! I mean I’ll call the nurse, no, the doctor. Where’s that damned buzzer?”

“Bag Boy, forget the buz… ”

I held my breath and positioned my hands to catch the tiny body as my mind whirled…catch like a football…the twin footballs nursing…Gabe’s first cry…miniature fingers grasping mine…swaddled babies tucked in my arms…. Gently, instinctively I held the perfectly formed head as first one shoulder then the other appeared and our child…wait… our beautiful daughter lustily introduced herself to her Mami and Papi.

I wanted to jump for joy, to run down the halls shouting the news and tell everyone how privileged and blessed I felt to have had this experience. I have been gifted with the closest bond a man can have with his child: to help bring her into the world in every sense of the word.

Instead, we just looked at each other and our little girl, blubbered ‘hellos’ and ‘I love you’s’, and grinned like fools. When Houdini regained the presence of mind to find and push the buzzer, a wery surprised Dr. Kienholz and nurse appeared and took our daughter from my now trembling hands.

“You were very quick, Susanna. You surprised us.”

“Not nearly as much as I surprised my husband, Dr. Kienholz. Bag Boy, I know what you’re going to say but this time you were the magical one.”

And you know what? I didn’t even argue. I did feel magical.

Happy Birthday, Brigitta Evelyne, the last of the Buhler’s less than 20 children.

**********

We still have two Newfies but sadly there’s been a change in the Old Guard. Our beloved Schatzi died in her sleep two years ago this spring. After the tears, the children insisted on a funeral so while Susanna helped them think of good things they could tell, Gabe and I wrapped her in her blue blanket, put her in her crate, and buried her under her favorite tree.

“Let’s take a little walk, son,” and we did, wandering just far enough into the woods to share our grief, helping him to understand that showing others our pain is a part of loving.

“Papi, when she came there was only you, me, and Mami. She was like my furry sister,” he said with a wistful smile.

“I learned a lot from her: like to lock the bathroom door,” I laughed, remembering how she’d attacked my underwear.

Pretty soon we could hear Susanna and the children coming. By the time we stepped out of the trees we were ready.

**********

At least Houdini could have warned me. When I wasn’t looking Noelle and Heidi turned into teenagers.

There we were one night snuggled up, my ten explorers just exploring away and she says, “Urs, the girls are starting to develop you know.”

No I didn’t know. “Develop what?” My explorers came to an immediate halt.

“They’re becoming young women now.”

“As in THE TALK?” I squeaked.

“Yes, Bag Boy, we’ve already had that and they wanted to know about shaving, and training bras and…

“Training bras? What are those? I didn’t even know they had anything to train and even if they did what are they trained to do?” I was wery confused.

“Think of it like a junior jock strap you kinda grow into,” she explained, after she stopped laughing.

I did not like to think about that at all. Then she said I needed to have a talk with Gabe and Karl. I patiently reminded her that was taken care of, in fact just recently with Karl, but she told me I needed to have another one.

What?! Yes, she informed me they needed to be cautioned not to tease or embarrass their sisters or go around doing things like snapping the back of their bra strap like when she was growing up. Did they do that in Switzerland?

I promised to remind the boys of how girls…uh women should be treated and stress their responsibility for looking out for their sisters. I claimed a faulty memory on the Switzerland question. After all there was that one girl I remember, now what was her name? Elise I think. I’d never have done it if Fritz hadn’t dared me.

If I could find some time between performing and worrying, I’d write a book, Wake Me When They’re 30.

**********

Gabe is doing a fine job with the riding mower…and the car. I’m teaching him all the rules and he is already starting to study for the exam even though it won’t be for two years.
I’ve been taking him out once in awhile on the back roads, mostly on our property. After all he needs to have practice driving on all sorts of roads and weather conditions doesn’t he? He can change a flat almost as quickly as I can and knows his way around under the hood too. Houdini has given me THE LOOK, but so far I’ve stayed strong. I figure I’ll break the news this summer. Then while she’s worrying about him driving the car, he’ll be ready for the bike. What fun that will be! Don’t breathe a word now. Sometimes it’s not easy having such a magical wife.


My Hero by Susanna

Some are born to greatness; others have it thrust upon them. In the case of Bag Boy I argue both apply. I’m certain midwifery would never cross his mind as a career choice however he stepped into the role as if on cue, well there was a little prompting from behind the curtain. Fortunately watching from the balcony for six performances bolstered his confidence as he stepped onto the stage for the most breathtaking, life-affirming duet of his life, ending in a thundering ovation from his newest Uber.

I’ve never seen such a gamut of emotions transition across a face before: fear, surprise, determination, concentration, excitement, awe, relief, joy, pride, and above all love.

**********

Prepare the children for Schatzi’s funeral, just how do you do that? Talk about feelings? Spout platitudes? Rationalize scientifically?

We all sat in a circle around her grave, with Brigitta practically sitting on Bear, holding his huge paw in her lap and strangling a fistful of flowers Heidi had helped her pick. Urs and I shared a look. How would our children remember this wonderful creature that had given us such unconditional love and devotion?

Urs began with a gentle smile, “Schatzi was full of surprises.”

“She was a wonderful mother,” I added, giving Gabe an encouraging hug.

Then from oldest to youngest, they each added their tribute: Gabe, Noelle, Heidi, Karl, Jon, Matthew, and Brigitta.

“She was my friend.”

“And she was smart. She always knew where her treats were hidden.”

“Schatzi was soft and cuddly.

“She loved to go exploring in the woods.

“And she never let us get lost, right Karl?”

“She let me sleep on her tummy and it was warm.”

“Schatzi gave tickly kisses to my ear.”

“Now,” whispered Heidi. Brigitta scrambled to her feet and put her flowers on the mound of dirt, then scampered back to the comfort of her Papi’s arms.

We all stood up, held hands, and said a prayer.

As we were about to leave, Matthew piped up, “We need a song, Papi, but I don’t know any dog songs.”

“I know the perfect song. I think we all agree that having Schatzi in our lives has made us all better people, ja? Let’s sing ‘You Raise Me Up’, for Schatzi.” And we did.

**********

In our busy and active Buhler family everyone has settled into their roles in the household. Urs does not even bat an eye now at having to tell the children that they are not finished, and to go back until they are. The older ones can get the kitchen spotless because of his instruction, and it’s so satisfying to see 16 year-old Gabe get a smiling thumbs up from his Papi as he checks out the newly mowed yard.

Actually it’s a wonder the grass gets a chance to grow at all since the mower is the only thing with an engine Gabe’s allowed to ride for another two years…at least it’s the only one I officially know about. I’ve seen the conspiratorial grins they’ve shared so it won’t be long before Urs breaks down and confesses what’s really going on. The dear man still hasn’t figured it out. The longer we’re married the worse he gets at keeping secrets.

Memo to self: call hairdresser for touch-up appt.

Urs seems a little…make that a lot, less interested in the state of my garden. I’m sure it’s a holdover from when he was younger and had to weed his Mami’s garden. You’d have thought he and Fritz were indentured servants tied to the land for life the way he tells it. At least Heidi and Karl don’t mind helping me in the garden, for their own reasons of course. If it were up to Heidi we’d grow one of every herb known to man so she could use them when she cooks whereas Karl would be constantly digging up the garden to inventory the worms and insects in the soil…with Brigitta’s help of course.

Noelle is a 14 year-old mami. She likes to stand behind me and bark orders at the others sometimes. She is less afraid to be mean than I am, so that works in her favor. Heidi and I have such fun in the kitchen and she’s becoming quite a good little cook, especially now that she’s gotten less heavy-handed with the spices!

Karl at 11, is my personal shopper and on market day I’m sure he must strike terror in more than a few of the vendors. He’s always strategizing about what costs less and what is a better value and above all is the best quality. Just recently he’s gotten interested in organic farming so some days I feel like I’ve had a science and math lesson by the time we finally get home. I have to remind him that things have more than just monetary value. Once in awhile it’s alright if Papi has a craving for white asparagus and it’s frightfully expensive or Mami just has to have those mouth-watering raspberries.

8 year-old Jon is a very independent ‘I can do it myself!’ child, making him the perfect ‘gopher’. Whatever I send him for, canned goods, food from the freezer, tissues, water, he’s back in a second. It’s usually with more than I asked for but he is very enthusiastic about it. He recently took over the auspicious job of separating the meat into individual freezer packet sizes when we go grocery shopping. Once a dreaded chore by the reluctant older children, now it’s a special, exciting project headed up by Jon: cooperation at its best.

Matthew is Jon’s assistant. Being the resident rock god in training, he’s the most energetic of all the children. He was so excited when he turned 6 because now one of his ‘grown-up’ chores is to make his own lunch in the morning with the others. In case you’re wondering what this event looks like picture the first five minutes at the day after Christmas sale with food. Although he’s not as good at fetching things as Jon, he has a much better eye for detail, meaning he is good at finding things. “Matt help me find my…!” is becoming a daily battle cry around our busy house.

Brigitta is 4, that age where independence has won the battle with babyhood. She is dependable enough for small tasks, and insists on helping Jon and Matt do their chores whether they need help or not. She’s developed a serious case of hero-worship for them and is absolutely fearless about trying anything she sees them doing. Persistent, affectionate, and always busy, would best describe our little tomboy with a capital T. In the words of Monsignor Mike, “Sometimes she scares the sweet bejesus out of us.”

Just like Heidi, she loves to draw. Right now she’s in her belly button phase. Everything she draws must have one prominently displayed although not necessarily in the anatomically correct place. Urs seemed a little concerned that his was on his forehead in the last picture, but as I told him, “She could start a trend here, Bag Boy, a whole new book series. Instead of Where’s Waldo? she could do Where’s the Bellybutton? He didn’t seem comforted by that idea.

Oh and did I mention she’s a born storyteller? As Urs likes to say, “Hasn’t that child ever heard of a one sentence answer? How she can make up a 15 min. story to go with a few little stick drawings is beyond me.” As a family we’ve learned the hard way not to ask if you’re in a hurry.



Growing Up by Gabe

Well here I am again and practically grown up now. Well at least that’s how I feel today. Tomorrow I might feel like just being a kid again. It’s strange being the oldest, the first one to grow up. Mami and Papi and I are all trying to figure it out together. None of us has ever been here before. They’re really cool about it though and love me no matter what age I decide to act today.

I’ve learned a lot from Papi, like how to shave without cutting myself. Yes, I’ve finally gotten a razor with a real blade along with a beard just like Papi’s. I’m not so sure I’ll like that part but it could be worse. He has passed down the blinky wink trait.

How the girls like that! Yes I have discovered girls although I don’t really have a girlfriend yet, well except maybe this girl Sylvie in my biology class. She didn’t go all giggly and squeally when we had to pick out our rat to dissect. My friends and I usually just hang out in groups at school stuff or go to the movies or even here at the house since none of us can drive yet. <blinky, wink>

Mami and Papi are cool with that and mostly make sure the younger ones don’t bug us, especially Elle and Heidi. Now that they’re 14 I’ve suddenly been elevated to favorite brother status, especially when I bring some of my guy friends home. Talk about obvious! Although when we went to Papi’s Christmas concert in Zurich this year I must say they cleaned up pretty good…for little sisters.


Goldilocks by Bear

I know. I miss her too but I’m trying my best to remember what she taught me, especially now that I’m in charge of showing Goldilocks the ropes.

Oh I forgot you don’t know who she is yet. Well it all happened like this.

I guess My Family, being such a big litter and all, decided they needed another dog to take the load off me so to speak. I mean to tell you those boys were starting to run me ragged with their exploring and football and playing in the snow. And my new Tiny Girl! It’d take two Matt’s and a half a Jon to keep up with her when she’s wired.

So I was sent on my first and sorry to say only date. I should have known. Like mother, like son. Well I did enjoy it while it lasted and thanks to Mom’s helpful hints I must say I seemed to make a favorable impression on my date. So in a round about way that’s how Goldilocks came to live with her father Bear.

Hold on now, I can see a few raised eyebrows out there. But do you really think My Man or My Woman would have allowed any hanky-panky between canine family members in a household with seven children? Unfortunately neither did I. The writing was on the wall, the vet’s wall that is.

So although I am not the same virile he-man I once was, having been dismembered so to speak, I’m still top dog around here. You might even call me the boss, at least until one of my Peepul tells me to do something. Darn those obedience classes anyway!


14 Going on 20 by The Twins

I told you she’d notice, Noelle.

But I only used a teensy bit of eyeliner. You don’t think Mami could really be a little magical do you Heidi? I mean Papi’s always saying that about her. What if you hear it so many times that it becomes true.

Louise dear, it would have been magical if she hadn’t noticed. I mean you look like Cleopatra. Next time I’ll grab my flute and charm an asp out of a jar for you to set the scene. Subtle I keep telling you; but you never listen.

Oh I get it, Thelma. Subtle like you hiding your French book under the sofa in the music room, I suppose. What a coincidence you remembering you needed it right after Gabe and his friends decided to hang out here.

Umm, that was good timing on my part I thought. And what good luck that Niklas just happened to be sitting on the sofa and just happened to find it for me.

Niklas Fleischer? Niklas the Butcher? I thought Lukas was the flavor of the week. I just can’t keep up with you, Thelma.

Well Lukas does have magnificent calves. Didn’t you notice when he scored that goal last week? But once I saw Niklas in that tight tee shirt, OMG those biceps!

Papi still looks good in his tight shirts, don’t you think Thelma…for an older man that is.

Yeah Louise, he does actually. He and Mami both are in good shape, but then he always liked to work out. Remember how he’d jog with us in our buggy?

And Schatzi would run along side.

And she usually managed to find some water to splash in.

I really miss her, Heidi.

Me too, Louise.

Just think, some day we’ll get married and have a dog. I wonder how you know when it’s the right one.

What? The dog or the husband?

No one likes a smart aleck, Heidi. Besides, I’m being serious here. I wonder how Mami knew Papi was the right one.

He was probably wearing a tight tee shirt.

Will you forget the tight tee shirts for a minute? I know it sounds silly but I bet he blinky winked her and that was it. Even after all these years I’ve seen him look at her and do a slow one and you can just tell they love each other.

<sigh> Yeah, they both get this little grin and it’s like their eyes get brighter.

I guess we’ll just have to be patient, Heidi, and look a lot of guys in the eye until we find the right one. In the meantime there’s nothing we can do except wait till Papi says we’re old enough to date. You don’t think he was serious when he mentioned 20 do you?

Who knows, Noelle, we are his first teenage daughters you know. In the meantime I’m going to be practicing on Niklas. Now where did I put my assignment book again? I absolutely must have it to see the date of our French test. Wish me luck!

Heidi, you are incorrigible.

I certainly hope so Noelle and you wouldn’t have me any other way.

You’ve got that right little sister. Good luck!

Buhler Family Blog #24
January 1, 2030


Together Again by Urs

The coffee is hot and fragrant; shaking me from my dozy stare while the fire pops and hisses as it gossips in the grate. My arm opens to welcome Susanna as I make a place on the sofa beside me. My heart is full…the coziness, the laughter, the gentle teasing…so precious, so quickly over.

Each year we hold our breath when we book the chalet hoping that all the children will be able to join us, yet knowing they are growing up and making their lives separate and apart from us. For this New Year, though we are all together still.

I may need to qualify that last sentence a bit. All the children were here for supper. As Susanna puts it: The only excused absence is death.

Breakfast is a staggered affair; then most days everyone heads out by two or threes. Gabe, Heidi, and Karl love getting the first run of the day and even challenge their Papi on occasion. Noelle will usually do a few runs while we’re here but still enjoys skating more than skiing. Jon, Matt, and Brigitta, being younger at 16, 14, and 12, do more snowboarding than anything else, being wery careful now to tone down their tricks when Susanna is watching. She about thudded to death, and not in a good way, the first time Matt did an Indie Grab.

This evening Gabe, Karl, and the twins have taken the four-wheel drive to the village while Jon, Matt, and Brigitta are in the throes of a cutthroat board game called Ticket to Ride. Since the directions are given in several languages, Brigitta’s latest tactic to outsmart her older brothers is to start interpreting the rules in a language they don’t understand. Uh oh, she just gave me a blinky-wink. Sure enough, here comes the Dutch; definitely her Papi’s daughter.

I think this might be an opportune time to take advantage of the hot tub. I keep telling Houdini it’s the chalet version of our handicapped shower but she just smiles and whispers, “Urs, not in front of the children.” Is it a blessing or a curse to have a wife with a magical memory?

**********

It’s finally happened…the first wedding of an Il Divo offspring. Thank Gott it wasn’t any of our less that 20 children. I’m not quite ready for that. According to Susanna as far as my girls are concerned I may never be ready.

It was Seb’s little Amelie, so young, only 23. All the Divos and their families were there. Through the years Gabe and Amelie have always remained close so it wasn’t any surprise that he was invited to be in the wedding.

So on a perfect, sunny afternoon in July Seb walked his beautiful daughter down the aisle. She and her new husband, a lawyer by the way, beaming with happiness made a stunning couple. Later at the outdoor reception we teased Seb that having a lawyer in the family could come in handy when he signs contracts. According to Seb, Alain is an up and coming young fellow at 27, worships Amelie, and best of all is a Parisian.

It was amazing how all of the children have grown. At our last few summer get-togethers several of the older ones were working or had other plans but all of them managed to be here for this very special occasion. I admit to being a tiny bit partial but I thought our brood looked wery impressive as the roving photographer snapped our picture.


**********

This past spring I had the thrill of a lifetime performing Bach’s Passion of St. John at the Lucerne Music Festival. Looking out over the audience in that magnificent concert house I have never felt more proud to be Swiss and grateful for the opportunity to share my music.



Then soon after that, I was contacted about the possibility of Il Divo doing a Christmas concert here since there was so much local support. As a result of scaling back our group appearances the past few years, it had been awhile since we’d done a concert at Christmas.

The idea appealed to us and evidently to a lot of other people because we played to a full house. Gabe may quip that full house was just another name for home, but when we took our final bow we four shared the same look as in our World Tour days. As we savored the moment we knew the challenge of performing, the satisfaction of making beautiful music, and the joyful excitement of connecting with the audience would never disappear.

I’ve also been connecting with some much smaller audiences to help raise money for the Montessori school that each of our children attended. Two years ago Susanna went back to her roots and began volunteering there. The next thing I knew I was being volunteered to be on the fundraising committee and that’s how I got involved with doing a few concerts to raise money. You can’t imagine how expensive maintenance is on older buildings.

Then she wondered if I’d like to ‘sit in’ one day during music time. Now that sneaky wombat woman has me well and truly hooked. I’m over there at least twice a month and I love it. I jokingly call it my musical version of the Kissing Hand. Sometimes I bring my guitar or violin or just sing. Their enthusiasm is infectious and I find myself listening to their sweet little voices and thinking someday when they’re older…with training…perhaps. Who knows? The Buhler family might just have another teacher in the making.


A Mother Knows by Susanna

Should I tell him or not? No, I think Urs would only panic or say he knew all along. I’d better wait until Gabe figures it out and tells me first. My not so little firstborn son, my baby, is in love.

I can hear you screaming out there. What? Not our little Gabe, our Cheerio Champion, our best blinky-winker this side of Urs, but alas I fear it is true. Mothers know these things…sometimes even before their sons do.

Of course I may be wrong. It does happen occasionally, well more than that but Bag Boy doesn’t know. I do have my magical reputation to uphold you know.

I still see that curly-headed boy clinging to me when he was little and it makes me want to cling to him now that he’s grown, but that would be selfish. What I wish for my children is that they find the love and happiness that Urs and I have found in our marriage…and I think this may be the one for Gabe.

I would love to be able to report some wicked city woman put a spell on the hapless lad but that’s not the way it happened at all.

First I’d better update you on Gabe since you’ve last seen him. Our strapping, now taller than his Papi, 24 year-old son has graduated from University and is teaching science in an Oberstufenschule (age 12-15) in Zurich. He laughs and says it started back when he and Karl would go exploring in the woods. Anyway, Gabe must have done a good job since Karl also went into science, but more about him later…back to the romance.

Urs told you a little about Amelie’s wedding and it happened there. Gabe was paired up with a longtime friend of Amelie’s named Lilly Neubert. I could say Cupid’s arrow shot them both through the heart and ‘boing’ they fell in love but it was subtler than that. Like his Papi, Gabe’s girlfriends usually have begun as friends and Lilly was no exception.

She is from Paris but works in Geneva as an au pair for a family with two children. Their friendship has blossomed despite being a long-distance once since Gabe lives in Zurich and they only see each other on weekends.

At first I had nightmares of Gabe burning up the autobahn on his bike. You see Urs has started a tradition too. When one of the children moves away they get a choice of a recent model bike or car, never a new one though. He and I both agree the privilege of buying a brand new car should be left to them. Fortunately, as the winter got colder and the weather got nastier Gabe decided to put his bike away and buy a used car so I don’t worry as much now.

Gabe has brought Lilly several times to visit and Urs and I like her very much. She’s a pretty girl with chestnut hair and sparkling green eyes; petite and vivacious with an easy laugh. At times I’ll see a flash of something in her eyes, a sudden emotion taking her by surprise, a realization, a calm and gentle loving certainty, mirrored in my firstborn’s eyes. Yes, it won’t be long before he’ll know too.

**********

Now what’s become of Noelle and Heidi, the dynamic duo, so much the same, yet very different? Although Gabe’s voice is so like Urs that I get all misty when he sings in the choir or even around the house, he never had the discipline to take it any further. It was always the natural beauty of the outdoors that lured him.

Noelle however, seems to have followed Urs in choosing music as a profession. She is also in Zurich studying for her MA in Specialized Music Performance Ensemble with the cello. I must admit it was not as hard to let her go since Gabe is there to keep his big brother eye on her, of course without her knowing it. She dates mostly musicians, but at 22 is too practical to be serious about any of them…or at least that’s what she tells Gabe. Much to my relief, unlike her big brother, little Miss Plans and Operations chose a car as her means of transportation.

Then there’s Heidi, single-handedly responsible for considerably more than her share of my well-hidden gray hair. After receiving an art degree, she decided she wanted to be a floral designer with her own shop someday, perhaps even in Lucerne. I was overjoyed! My nest would not be as empty as I thought.

Oops, didn’t we know that to study gardening, floriculture, landscape and floral design THE place to go was England? Obviously we didn’t know. So there she is among the topiaries and knot gardens and orangeries or whatever.

Now was there any doubt in your mind which type of vehicle she chose? My only consolation is that she may be over there but her bike is safely stored over here. I believe the phrase, “Over my dead body,” might have come into play during several of our lively discussions.

**********

Gabe did teach his younger brother well because later this year Karl will leave the nest to go to the University of Bern to study conservation biology. Urs seems to understand it pretty well when Karl and Gabe try to explain it, something to do with agricultural and alpine ecosystems and then they lose me and I know it’s time for me to bake cookies.

Speaking of ecosystems, Karl’s got a little out of balance I think when he saw Pilar at Amelie’s wedding. What a difference a year makes, especially when you have gorgeous Gavina for a mother and an almost larger than life father like Carlos. Pilar will certainly be a force to be reckoned with some day.

Our 18-year old Karl was in shock. It was as if he’d discovered some beautiful, rare, exotic creature. All he could do was stand back and observe from a distance at first. Finally about halfway through the reception there must have been an opening in her circle of admirers and lo and behold the next thing I knew they were through the buffet table and off eating together and she looked like she was really interested in what he was saying. Well it’s not as if they’re strangers but Karl is so focused and serious. I wonder what they found to talk about.

Oh and I almost forgot to tell you about Karl’s part time job. When the season opens on March 21st he’ll be working at Ropetech Park near Bern. It caters to both school groups and individuals with bridges, climbing ropes and zip lines above gullies and in the treetops. It really works out well for him because on weekends he will stay with his Aunt Ingrid and Uncle Hans.



**********

Now for the rest of the clan: Jon, Matt, and Brigitta. Jon will turn 17 in April and will temporarily be leaving the nest to spend the summer in Florida with Grandmuz and Grandpa John. He has recently discovered golf of all things here in Switzerland and Grandpa John has a job lined up for him at the golf course in their housing development. While Jon is staying there he can help with any little maintenance jobs that need to be done around their house. Since both of them are getting up there in age, I’d also like some first hand knowledge about how they’re doing day-to-day, not just when they’re here on a flying visit.

Matt is still the would be rock god, electric guitar and all, but no earring until he’s at least 16. I’m not sure who enjoyed negotiating that compromise more, Urs or me. When I tease him about reliving his lost youth, he just hands me one of those killer grins.

Brigitta is still Urs’ little tomboy, 12 going on 18 or so she thinks. So far I’ve only seen her riding behind Urs on his bike, but I have my suspicions. Give me strength!


Life is Good by Gabe

I guess the apple doesn’t fall very far from the tree because I absolutely love teaching and I know Mami is thrilled. Did you know the kids really do bring apples to their teachers? Well I admit it’s mostly just a few of the girls, but I am keeping my blink-winks under lock and key, honest, so I think they actually like me as their teacher.

The boys seem to be cool with me too since I know exactly how to grab their attention…show them the yucky, gross stuff. Then of course zooming into the school parking lot the first day of class on my bike didn’t exactly hurt my reputation either. I may never be rich, but I wouldn’t trade places with anybody right now. Uh, well unless they were teaching in Geneva that is.

I suppose Mami has already clued you in to what she thinks is going on between Lilly and me. Honestly I don’t quite know myself except to say she’s so different and special compared to the other girls I’ve met. We’ve only been dating since July but I don’t think it took Papi wery long to realize Mami was the one for him.

Even though it’s difficult for Lilly and I to see each other except on weekends, everything around me is brighter and happier when we’re together. Sometimes I see Mami and Papi look at each other with such tenderness and love I almost feel like I’m intruding. It’s as if they share a secret so wondrous, so impossible to hold inside, that they almost glow with happiness. That’s what I want to feel with Lilly.

Oh, I know what you’re probably thinking. Love isn’t all sweetness and light and I know that too. I remember growing up how none of us children could play one parent against the other and believe me we tried. They always presented a united front. We’d get the same answer no matter which one we asked.

But Mami and Papi also had their grown-up differences. I think by allowing us to see how they handled some of these we learned to respect other points of view even if we didn’t agree with them. With seven children in the family we got a whole lot of practice I can tell you; but we learned to talk to each other honestly, to compromise, and to never ever go to bed until we’d made up. That made for a few wery long evenings as we were growing up, especially when the twins were involved.



Papa Bear Says by Goldilocks
Hi everybody. It’s me, Goldilocks, just popping in between meals. I know you’re supposed to brush after eating but it’s ever so much more fun to blog. Besides since I’m still a growing girl my day is rather like one continuous nosh. In the words of my latest poem:

I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating.

Papa Bear, (now really, you didn’t think there would be a Papi Bear in this blog did you?) has been ever so helpful, passing down all the fatherly pearls of wisdom he has learned over the years.

For your entertainment and edification I’ve jotted down a few. Please feel free to pass them along to any and all of your canine acquaintances.

1. Just because there does not seem to be anything visible around to eat certainly does not mean there IS nothing around to eat. The act of staring at the underside of a table or chair on which someone else is eating sets in motion a chain of events that eventually results in food.

2. It goes without saying that you should carefully check the lower third of any space for edibles.
WARNING: Mouth-sized things, which cannot be
identified by sight or smell, are considered gum.

3. If you really see something you want, and all your
attempts at getting it have failed, it is only right
to grovel shamelessly. As an alternate tactic, stare
intently at the object of your desire, allowing long
gelatinous drools to leak like icicles from your lower lip.

Memo to self: The sofa is not a face towel ... neither
are My Peepul’s laps.

4. Lastly, any time that is not mealtime is potentially
naptime. The most advantageous time to take a nap is
when you hear your name being called repeatedly. The
best location for a nap is dead center in any room that
contains your Peepul. The most relaxing position is on
your side, all four limbs parallel.


Details by the Twins

So older sister dearest, I need some details about Herr Viktor the Viennese. I’ll just bet he’s an awesome dancer. Just imagine waltzing the night away just like Mami did when she and Papi were dating. I’d simply melt and become a little grease spot right there on the dance floor.

How many times do I have to tell you he’s not from Vienna? He’s from Linz and stop calling me older sister dearest… Thelma.

Ah Linz, of course, the illustrious capital of Upper Austria. I do apologize, Louise. I always seem to get that one confused with Vienna, silly me.

You’re wasting you time trying to wind me up, Thelma. It won’t work and besides I don’t give details unless I get some in return so let’s cut to the chase. I know you’re dying to tell me about it.

And just what is it you think you know big sister?

Read my lips sweetie. B-I-K-E.

Just wait till I get my hands on Gabe. And I thought I could trust him. He is so dead!

Now don’t go getting your knickers in a twist, Thelma. He didn’t really tell me, I guessed. So come on…give.

Oh, alright. I can never keep anything from you any way, Noelle, but first you have to say it with me.

OK, OK, I know. Cross my heart and hope to die. Stick a needle in my eye.


Honestly Louise, you have no idea how bummed out I was when Mami put a bug in Papi’s ear about not letting me take my bike to England with me. But then I met Ian who works at the pub and he rides this black Ducati.

And?

And it’s sweet.

Ian or the Ducati?

You silly wombat! The bike, of course. Well I didn’t exactly mean it like that. Ian is sweet too, especially when he lets me take it for a ride. There’s nothing like that feeling of freedom when I open it up on those B roads. I don’t know why you never liked riding much Louise.

You mean why didn’t I enjoy breathing smelly exhaust, having the poop scared out of me and arriving at my destination with helmet hair, sweating like a pig? Gee, Thelma I just can’t imagine.

So how are things going with your little Linzertorte?

Well right now Viktor Weber…(Gott I just love saying his name. It sounds so powerful and masculine. Don’t you think so?)…is madly practicing Mozart’s Violin concerto in G Major along with a couple of Bach sonatas. The poor man only took off two days to spend with his family over the holidays. What dedication!

Sure, sure , what ever you say, Louise. Now what does this man with the powerful, masculine name look like?

He’s tall, over 6 feet, slim, and he has the most beautiful hands with such graceful long fingers, like Papi, you know. That’s probably one of the reasons he’s such a genius with the violin or at least he soon will be. Did I tell you he has an audition in three weeks for Assistant Principal 2nd Violin with the Zurich Chamber Orchestra?

And you think he really has a chance?

Oh yes, he completed his degree three years ago and he’s already had experience playing with string ensembles in Austria. If he wins this audition he’ll be part of the core group of strings. They also have 20 other occasional musicians in their group. Next year when I graduate I’m going to apply for that. Did I mention he has gorgeous hair? Very dark brown and I just love the way it curls over his collar just a little.

I bet he looks dashing and handsome in his tux, especially with that moustache.

Wait a minute. I didn’t say he had a moustache. How did you know…unless?

What can I say, Louise? Big brother is watching you. It’s not my fault Gabe and I share the soul of a biker. So when I happened to divulge a certain detail of mine to him and he somehow felt compelled to share a certain detail in return, well who am I to stop him?

You are such an evil twin, Heidi.

I know, Noelle but you love me anyway.

How could I not, Heidi. Even Gabe doesn’t know where ALL the skeletons are buried.

Buhler Family Blog #25
January 1, 2033

Bigger and Better by Urs

“Gabe, will you please take the baby? I think he needs changing and I’m trying to write here.”

Sorry, for that little interruption. I guess we weren’t quite finished with Buhler babies after all. Fortunately the love and happiness has continued to grow along with our still expanding family. We’re even bigger and better than before.

Now I imagine you’re anxious to know if Gabe and Lilly were truly in love. As Brigitta would say, "It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are...on fire." Spoken like my true 15 year-old romantic.

So yes, I suppose you could say Gabe and Lilly were flambéed in Geneva on October 8, 2031, a little over two years after they met at Amelie’s wedding. I’ll let Susanna give you the details.

Lilly’s parents, Francois and Gerard are lovely people and we get along quite well. Although they can speak English I’m using Susanna’s new mother-in-law status to shame her into learning French. Since Brigitta is in her second year of French as her extra language, she’s become Susanna’s self-appointed tutor. More than once I’ve heard Susanna grumble about her hard task master. I just grin and comment sympathetically …in rapid French of course. It drives Houdini wild.

Since Gabe now needs to share his time with both families we’ve divided the winter holidays. Last year Gabe and Lilly were here for Christmas and this year they are here with us for New Years. Of course we had to save some presents for everyone to open then.

**********

We have another newcomer to the chalet this year. Heidi brought her boyfriend, Jakob Rast, well ackshully he was her boyfriend until last night when he nervously asked to speak to me alone.

I felt my stomach drop to my knees as he asked my permission to marry my little girl…my baby who had suddenly grown into this beautiful woman, this beautiful wanting-to-leave-her-family-and-get-married-woman. Like her mother, I could not refuse her anything, but this was so…so life-changing. She would be leaving us…me, her Papi, not like when Gabe was married.

That was different. With him I felt as if we were still attached, father and son. Perhaps the band connecting us had stretched a little more but that was all. But with Heidi that band would be severed, a part of our connection would be lost forever.

I called on every ounce of stage presence I commanded and rose to the occasion as I gave Jacob my permission and congratulations. In my heart I know he is a good man and they love each other deeply but is there any father who thinks this day does not come years too soon?

So amid teary-eyed toasts and squeals of delight, the happy couple was joyfully welcomed and passed around as the first gift of the New Year.

**********

Thankfully 19 year-old Jon was able to get back home for the holidays since he’s now working towards a degree in golf management in Florida. As usual Muz and John are cruising somewhere warm and we’ll see them later this summer.
They love having Jon stay with them and Jon is thrilled to be off ground crew duty and working as a weekend starter. I remember that first summer we sent him over to work. We called him after he’d been there about a week to see how he was doing. “Papi, if weed eating and edging were an Olympic sport, I’d win a medal.”
On weekends after Jon is finished working, he and Grandpa usually play a round together. During the week he attends classes in business communications, business management, fundamentals of golf turf, and greens maintenance.
Being an employee, he can play for free so depending on his class schedule he tries to practice whenever he can and already has a 6 handicap. Once his coursework is complete he’ll do an internship at various types of golf courses such as par 3, executive, and championship.

**********

Karl is still a very serious student at the University of Bern and will graduate next year. Then he will go on for his European Master in Agro-ecology – identifying causes and developing conservation plans to stop the decline in biodiversity. Susanna thinks I totally understand what Karl is explaining when he discusses his latest project but in truth he often loses me in the details and in the end all I’ve gotten out of it is a throbbing headache. Of course I’d sooner never sing another Wagner role than admit it to either Karl or his mother.

**********

Noelle and Matt are both still pursuing music; one with passion and the other with shall we say ‘abandonment’. We were so thrilled when Noelle passed her audition to become one of the 20 supplementary members of the Zurich Chamber Orchestra. In time she is hoping to gain a place as a permanent member. She and Viktor are seriously dating now so another of my little girls will probably be deserting her old Papi one of these days. At least I’ll still have Brigitta. I wonder if it’s too late to pray for a religious vocation.

Matt finally got his earring if that tells you anything. He is playing guitar in a band with some friends on weekends just for fun but hasn’t made up his mind about a university. He says, “It will come to me”. Houdini’s answer to that was, “OK Matt, you’re 17 now. We’ll give you a year. If it hasn’t come to you by then, we’ll just have to take you to ‘it’”. Be afraid Matt, be wery afraid. Until then Matt and I plan on escaping to the music room with our guitars at every available opportunity.



Mother and Son, Father and Daughter by Susanna

“There is an enduring tenderness in the love of a mother to a son that transcends all other affections of the heart.”
Washington Irving

How can I describe the unique relationship between Gabe and me? As his father, Urs has showed him how to interact with others, show affection to others, and respond to different situations. But as his mother I am so grateful to have had a chance to show him how a girl wants to be treated and how he should expect to be treated in return.

I’ve tried to listen to him with my full attention, definitely a challenge as our family grew, and let him know his thoughts, feelings, and questions were important. Hopefully he knew that my tender heart would be able to give him advice from a woman’s perspective and always keep his confidences. And now my little boy has grown up to be a man.

How well I remember the troubles he caused and the triumphs he brought. There were times I despaired of his being ready to go out on his own, but then there were times I was sure his brilliance would change the course of the world.

Then he found this wonderful girl who decided to gamble her whole life on my son. So with the burdens he is willing to assume for her and the sacrifices she is willing to make for him, they combined their high-flown plans, ambitions, and wise and foolish dreams.

Then in that special moment of music and flowers and awe their lives were joined for better or worse as I held tightly to Urs’ hand, our hearts full of memories and a touch of pain and loss.

As last they ran freely and joyously down the steps to begin their new life amid a rain of birdseed and good wishes, surrounded by the look of tender benevolence on the faces of family and friends.

**********

Poor Urs! He kept his game face on in front of everyone as we celebrated Heidi’s engagement but later when we were alone he looked absolute stricken. When Gabe got married I couldn’t explain how I felt but he’ll understand when he walks her down the aisle.

You may have heard of that theory ‘six degrees of separation’. Well just as Gabe met Lilly through Amelie, he and Lilly returned the favor by introducing Heidi to Jakob.

I think the last you heard Heidi was in England doing her floriculture training. When she finished, she came back, got a job in Zurich, and moved in with Noelle. Of course it would have been wonderful to have her closer but then Zurich is only an hour away and with Gabe there, we can see all of them at the same time.

Anyway, Jakob is a banker and a longtime school friend of Lilly’s so when Heidi needed some financial advice I think big brother Gabe decided to combine a little business with pleasure. First it was ‘Jakob thinks … Jakob says… I want you to meet Jakob…’ then, ‘Jakob has asked for a transfer to Zurich…’ and finally, ‘Just think, Mami, next year I’ll be Mrs. Jakob Rast’.

I’ve already seen how their strengths and weaknesses mesh since his organized and practical side helped her temper her impulsiveness when she was planning and financing her flower shop. As for Jakob, with her bubbly personality and exuberance she never allows him the luxury of taking himself too seriously, such an important skill in a stressful job.

Urs the Fair and Logical would never admit it, but I knew he still has his doubts that any man alive would be a ‘suitable’ man for his daughter, even if she is 25 years old.

“Look at them together, Urs. Can you tell me that’s not the same I-love-you-and-I’ll-do-anything-in-the-world-for-you look you give to me?”

Of course he admitted he couldn’t, but later that night, I had to agree Urs’ look was just a teensy bit better, after all who could resist the Buhler Glance? Much later, Urs agreed, reluctantly, Jakob might just be worthy of a Buhler daughter.

And by the next morning he could hardly wait to call Seb and share his news. “You may have a lawyer in your family but I’ll soon have a Swiss banker.” Men!!!

**********

Yes it’s true the Buhlers did have another baby up their sleeve. It just wasn’t Magical Susanna and Bag Boy’s sleeve. It was Gabe and Lilly’s.

Our little curly-haired Urs’ clone, now has one of his own. At 27, Little Gabe has become a father.

It’s here, it’s here, our first grandchild!
I hung up the telephone, rejoicing. I gazed out the window, dazzled and awed.

“Just a few minutes ago,” I said, turning to Urs. “A beautiful little boy.”

We stood there, hugging, laughing, kissing, and smiling with tears streaming down our cheeks.

He arrived with the sunrise radiating streams of pink and gold blessings across the world for this little new life that is beginning his first day.

The very trees lift up their branches as if in welcome, as if to receive him. And I want to fling out my arms too, in joy and gratefulness and welcome.

Happy birthday to you grandchild, on this cold, bright last day of November 2032. Welcome, Marc Frederick Buhler, our first grandchild, our first grandson.

**********

I’m beginning to think our children think absence makes the heart grow fonder. Did they learn that from us? First it was Gabe in Zurich and Lilly in Geneva, then Heidi in Zurich and Jakob in Geneva. Now Karl, who is 22, has been burning up the TGV tracks between Bern and Paris where Pilar is studying theatrical set design.

They’ve been dating steadily ever since meeting again at Gabe’s wedding. What drew this beautiful, vivacious young woman, and this handsome, serious, young man together? You might laugh when I tell you it is passion, but I truly believe their attraction began when they recognized the passion each had for their work: hers a flamboyant embrace of the artistic world, his a methodical scientific analysis of connections within the natural order. I like to think of it as feeding ones soul and body thus forming a perfect complement for each other.



Aha Moments by Gabe


Life may not be all sweetness and light but you could have fooled me on that happiest day of my life when I married Lilly. My personal definition of breathtaking changed in a millisecond as I saw this vision floating towards me.

I saw Mami’s bright-eyed smile confirming the physical reality but it was Papi’s almost imperceptible blinky wink that validated what I was feeling. ‘Yes,’ it said, ‘this overpowering feeing of love and awe and protection and a thousand other jumbled feelings is right and true when you are joined to your soulmate. This is what I felt for your Mami on our special day 28 years ago and it has grown stronger every day.’

Then Lilly was before me as I accepted her hand from her father and following my parents’ tradition, Father Ludwig and Monsignor Mike assisted Father Defaux in performing the marriage ceremony.

The whirlwind of the reception, greeting, dancing, eating, and toasting would have passed in a blur of excitement were it not for Uncle Fritz special toast, destined to become a Buhler wedding tradition. I saw that look in Mami’s eye. He rose to explain how he’d been patiently waiting for another opportunity to pass on his wish since it had been awhile since the last Buhler wedding.

“My greatest wish for the two of you is that through the years your love for each other will so deepen and grow, that years from now you will look back on this day, your wedding day, as the day you loved each other the least. To Lilly and Gabriel….”

I’m happy to say my parents were blissfully unaware of our thank you that followed as they renewed their own promises to each other with whispers and kisses.

Now about the honeymoon destination…just where do you suppose someone with six scheming younger brothers and sisters might go? All I will say is it was far away…wery far.

**********


I didn’t think we’d be starting a family quite so soon but I think Mami must have given Lilly the secret to the Buhler men. As I’ve heard Papi say so often, “I can’t deny her anything.” Like father, like son, what can I say? So a month after our first anniversary, our son Marc was born.

When we first found out Lilly was pregnant I wondered just how to tell Mami and Papi, I mean it was kinda you know…embarrassing. One night when we were all together for supper I said, “I think the Buhler family needs to get a little bigger.” Everyone froze and looked at Mami and Papi. Papi looked at Mami, Mami looked at Papi, then they looked at us and Lilly and I nodded. I think I might have even blushed a little. I know Lilly did. Suddenly we were all laughing, kissing, hugging, and crying. Even Bear and Goldilocks were jumping up in excitement. Then Mami and Papi both made me make a strange promise: not to read any books to Lilly when she was in labor. Now who in the world would do such a dumb thing?

**********

Until I had a son of my own I never knew the joy, the love beyond feeling that resonated in my heart as I looked upon him. I was filled with such a sense of honor that made me want to be more than I am and to pass something good and hopeful into the hands of my son.

As I held this tiny bundle I pictured Papi holding me when I was born. Surely he gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me. It's only now that I’m grown up and have stepped back from him, now that I have my own career and home and family that I can measure his greatness and fully appreciate it.

Teacher, playmate, model, conscience, friend…all those things he was to me I pray I will be for my newborn son.


**********

Now that Marc had his first birthday I really want to get a dog but Papi said it wouldn’t do any good to ask Lilly. He mentioned some rule mothers have about no dogs until the child is potty trained. At least when it comes time for that I’ll be ready with my secret weapon: cheerios. Goldilocks, if you’re listening, I hope you won’t be too old to be a mother when the time comes.



At Last by Goldilocks

How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug.

My Grand-dog Schatzi and Papa Bear both told me about having one but I never thought it would happen. Then one cold winter day it did.

My most oldest Grown-up Boy brought little Goldilocks her wery own Tiny Boy.

“Look here Goldi, (that’s what My Grown-up Boy calls me) what do you think?”

I thought he smelled beautiful, like he was fresh washed with soap and smoothed soft with sugary powder. There was another smell too. Papa said it was a new baby smell just like My Peepul used to say I smelled like when I was a puppy. I’ll never forget his smell.

He was kinda shaped like my outdoor football, wrapped round and round with his own blanket, just like mine ’cept smaller. When My Grown-up Boy’s Lady unwrapped him he reached out to me, I just know he did. Later, Papa said he was probably just stretching but I know he wanted to pet me so I stood wery still so he could get to know my feel and I could get to know his smell.

“Hi, I’m Goldilocks, but you can call me Goldi when you learn to talk. It’s nice to meet you. I’ve never had My wery own Little Boy before but I promise to look out for you when you’re here and be your friend forever.

Then do you know what My wery own Little Boy did? He smiled at me, a really truly smile, no matter what Papa Bear said. I am in love.


Having a Blast by the Twins

If you have a sec Heidi I’ve jotted down a few things you might like to think about for the wedding.

A few things! Louise, get a grip. This is two pages long …double-sided. Jakob only proposed last night.

Well you do tend to do things on short notice, Thelma.

Not this time, Louise. Jakob’s transfer to Zurich won’t even be coming through till the spring and we plan on being engaged at least a year so we can save for a house and…

OK, OK Thelma I get it. But when the time comes I’ll still be in charge of Plans and Operations right?

You know you’re the only one who can keep me organized Noelle, but I want to get serious a minute. I know you and Viktor have been dating awhile and what if he proposed and then we could…

What? And watch Papi go into cardiac arrest when Viktor asks for my hand? You’ve got to be kidding! I thought he was going to wet himself when Jakob asked to talk to him alone. He about swallowed his tongue.

But Louise, I thought it might be fun to walk down the aisle together…the Buhler Brides, still together after all these years.

Look Thelma, you’re ready for this; I’m not. First of all Viktor and I aren’t in the same place in our relationship that you and Jakob are. We’re both very focused on our careers. Oh not that the ‘M’ word hasn’t been mentioned casually but right now we’re putting all of our energy into our music. He’s busy positioning himself to be concertmaster one day and I’m doing everything I can to get the next available opening in the permanent orchestra.

Well just make sure you still have some of that energy when it comes time to shop for the wedding, big sister. I’m counting on you to be right there with me. I don’t know what I’d do if we ever lived in different cities.

Hellloooo! Louise here. Remember me? I’m the sister you brought along to use as a pack animal when we went Christmas shopping for Marc, the same sister who had to practically carry you and your umpteen packages upstairs.

Yes, but you must admit Louise, we had a blast drinking wine and wrapping packages while we soaked our feet.

I wouldn’t expect any less when we’re together, Thelma, now about that list…I was thinking a spring wedding, lots of pastels, but remember Mami has to have pink and how about…

The Buhler Bride
Coming Home May 14, 2034

Tuesday

“Well, kiddo, you haven’t lost your touch. That veal was just the way I remembered it and I think I might just need to finish up that little bit of spatzli, if no one else wants it that is,” John Nelson looked sheepishly around the table and, seeing no takers, reached for the dish.

“I declare, John, anyone would think I didn’t feed you. It must be all this fresh mountain air. It does seem to make everything taste better or maybe it’s just that I didn’t have to cook it,” laughed Muz perhaps a little too self consciously as she gave a quick smile to John.

“Thanks, Daddy. It’s always nice to be appreciated for more than just my cookies,” Susanna smiled as she looked directly at Urs.

“What? I love everything you cook, Susanna, even those exotic recipes you try out on us. Right, Gitta? C’mon here Matt help me out,” Urs begged.

“Uh, that’s right Mami, we love being your guinea pigs, it’s just that with everyone home for Heidi’s wedding it’s like Christmas; you baking all our special favorite cookies. Then you had to go and hide them till we were all here,” Matt the Diplomat explained.

“Koo-kee, koo-kee,” Marc clapped, sending a few stray peas flying, but not for long as a large black head scoured the floor in search of more heavenly manna from her Little Boy.

“Yes, Marc, Grandmami will get you a cookie and Grandpapi will help,” Urs grinned as he quickly rose from his chair and began gathering plates. This was obviously a signal for Brigitta and Matt as they quickly cleared the table and followed Urs into the kitchen.

“Urs Buhler, you are without a doubt the biggest cookie monster in the history of the world. You just want to find out where I hid them, don’t you?”

“Well…?” Urs grinned but to no avail as Susanna motioned Matt and Brigitta to the other side of the room and began whispering to them while keeping her eye on Urs.

Minutes later, the two children returned laden with several tins and plastic containers. Susanna shooed Matt and Urs back into the dining room as she and Brigitta began arranging the cookies on platters.

Susanna and Urs presided with proud smiles and loving laughter and teasing over the long table filled with their less than 20 children and parents: Marian and John Nelson, Adriana and Karl Buhler, Gabe, Lilly, and Marc, Noelle, Heidi, Karl, Jon, Matt, and Brigitta.

“Oh yes, chocolate crinkles!”
“Pass the brunsli over here.”
“We need some of those chocolate crinkles down at our end of the table you know.”
“Papi’s watching, Gabe. You’d better not take the last chocolate rum truffle.”
“Here you go Marc, a snickerdoodle just for you.”

“See, Lilly, we really do need to be getting Marc a dog. Goldi doesn’t miss a bit, do you old girl?” Gabe said as he reached down to give her a scratch on her favorite spot behind her ear.

“I guess I can’t keep putting you off can I, mon amour, now that Marc is out of diapers?” Lilly admitted with a smile as she looked lovingly over at Gabe.
Susanna quickly looked over at Urs, fully expecting him to jump and run over to Gabe with a high five and shouts of “Cheerios!” but with great effort he restrained himself as father and son congratulated each other with blinky winks.

“I can speak to Mrs. Gisler, the church secretary if you like. She has one of Goldi’s puppies and I think she’s getting ready to breed her next time she’s in season,” Susanna volunteered.

As if on cue, Marc announced to the table that it was indeed time to potty as Lilly whisked him off and Gabe began to clean up his high chair.

**********

Susanna looked up as Matt and Brigitta walked into the family room where everyone was lounging either in soft leathers sofa and chairs or on huge floor pillows. “Thanks for cleaning up, guys.”

“No problem, where’d Marc go?” they asked.

“Gabe and Lilly took him up for his bath. I expect they’ll bring him down later so he can say goodnight.”

“Muz I hope you and Daddy didn’t mind that we put you in the cottage. We just thought it would be a little quieter there for sleeping. It tends to be like an all night sleepover when we get all the children here at the same time. Besides Nanny T and Denis will be coming on Friday for the wedding so you’ll have them for company the rest of the week. We really miss them but now that we’ve got Marc we understand why they wanted to go back to England before all their grandchildren were grown up.”

“Oh no, not at all dear. In fact I was rather dreading all those stairs in the house here, wasn’t I dear?” Muz threaded her fingers through John’s hand and gave it a little pat with her other hand. “I’m so thankful our house is all on one floor. I don’t know how you all just bound up and down as if it’s nothing. I’m afraid these old knees of mine aren’t up to it anymore.”

“How about we leave these young ones and get back to that bridge game we started earlier, Karl. I believe we were about to show our wives just how the game is played,” John winked.

“You mean how you come from behind, ja?” teased Adriana as she stood to join her husband.

“Really, I think Grandpa John just likes driving Papi’s latest toy. It reminds him of home,” Jon acknowledged.

“It is not a toy; it’s a golf cart. After all, the cottage is at the back of the property. I didn’t want guests to think they had to plod through a meadow to get to the house. It’s also very practical. Why just the other week Susanna was using it to haul bags of fertilizer for her flower garden weren’t you?” Urs the Unfrivolous and Ever Practical sputtered.

“Yes, of course I was. Now say goodnight Bag Boy,” Houdini said in her best George Burns imitation; fortunately Urs didn’t realize he was Gracie Allen.

**********

“So Heidi, I guess since you have your own flower shop you’ll be pulling out all the stops on Saturday, ja?” asked Karl.

“Simple and elegant, Karl, just like me, little brother,” Heidi attempted in her poshest voice.

“Alright, I’ll give you elegant; you do clean up well but simple? Never! Your little mind has more turns than Glaubenburg Pass,” Karl refuted.

“You’re looking at the wrong twin here, Karl. Noelle is Plans, I’m Operations,” Heidi shot back with a shake of her head as she rolled her eyes at him. All these years and he still couldn’t get it right.

“And you lived up to your name from the very first too, little Miss Operations. You know I always knew you’d go into something to do with flowers. I remember that time you girls were playing dress-up or as you called it ‘Klip-Kloping’ because I let you toddle around in my old high heels. I’d given each of you one of my old purses and at naptime Heidi flat out refused to let go of her big purse. Finally when I looked inside I realized why. It was filled with all my newly planted petunias. At the time though I don’t recall being too enthused over your career choice,” Susanna laughed.

“Ah there’s my boy!” Urs’ face lit up as he opened his arms for Marc’s goodnight kiss.

“Night Ganpapi,” Marc said as he looked up at Urs and pursed his pink rosebud mouth for a kiss and hug.

“Night Ganmami.”

“Night, sweepea. Sleep tight, don’t let the bedbugs bite.”

Then he wiggled down as his jammie-clad feet took him around the room to bestow his baby powder sweet kisses and hugs to the rest of his family.

**********

Susanna’s misty eyes followed Marc’s progress up the stairs on Gabe’s broad shoulders as she snuggled a little closer to Urs. “No matter how many you have you never stop marveling at the miracle.”

Urs the Eternal Pragmatist’s arm tightened around her lovingly as he smiled, “Ja, and coming up with ways to organize the growing little miracles. I think back to when Gabe was born; at the first whimper or frown we’d pick him up. Then when the twins arrived, we’d let them fuss unless it threatened to wake Gabe. But by the time Karl arrived I’d taught Gabe how to rewind the mechanical swing.”

“I’d forgotten that, Bag Boy,” Houdini said as she reached up to give Urs a kiss. “Those were the days! How many swings did we go through? It must have been three or four.” As her voice trailed off taking her back to that time, her now grown family looked around at each other and their parents with new-found gratitude and appreciation.

“But remember the Christmas before Brigitta was born when I was gone for two weeks. You were ready to trade in a few of those days. As I recall, one of your emails asked me to look for a recording of Tibetan monks chanting ‘Don’t eat in the living room’ and ‘Take your hands off your brother,’ because your voice seemed to be out of the children’s hearing range and could only be heard by Bear,” Urs chuckled as Susanna nodded and rolled her eyes.

“Then there’s was the time you decided to take the children grocery shopping by yourself,” Susanna grinned, giving Urs a playful poke in the ribs. “I think we only had four then. When you got back and had recovered sufficiently and could speak, you said it was like keeping a herd of small goats in sight and paying for anything they eat or damage.”

“Now c’mon we weren’t that bad were we?” Karl said indignantly. “Wait, on second thought Mami I do remember one time you chased me up a tree. Then I climbed down and you couldn’t, so Gabe and I had to get Papi’s long ladder and prop it against the tree for you.”

“Yes, but in your rush to rescue me you didn’t put the ladder back where it belonged,” Susanna elaborated.

“And at supper Papi asked us who used the ladder and what could we do? We had to tell the truth. You tried so hard to keep a straight face when you sent us to Australia,” Karl chuckled as he pointed at Urs.

“What about that time in the airport in New York? It was so crowded that Mami had us sit over to the side in a little circle and Papi went and got pizzas and set them in the middle and we had a picnic. Remember that, Noelle?” Heidi asked as she acted out the scene complete with circling arms.

“Oh yeah, and we went to the top of the Empire State Building and in Boston we saw Harvard, and Concord, and Lexington, and Old Ironsides. We really learned a lot that summer Mami. Too bad Matt and Brigitta weren’t born yet. You guys should really try to get there some day you know.”

“I’m sure I’ll get there one of these days because I plan on doing an internship in the States, but right now I have a little reading for class tomorrow so I’ll say goodnight,” Matt said, bending to kiss Susanna and hug Urs.

As Matt got halfway up the stairs he turned, “By the way, what I remember most is how happy I felt when Brigitta was born,” he said with a smile.

“Why thank you Matt, I never knew that,” Brigitta smiled.

“Yeah, I was so glad that I wasn’t the youngest one anymore and finally I could be the boss of someone,” he smiled cheekily as he turned and took the rest of the stairs two at a time with Brigitta close on his heels.

“No wonder I ran away from home with you for a brother!” was her parting cry as she hurried upstairs.

Gabe effectively silenced both of them at the top of the stairs with his stern announcement: “Marc is asleep.” By the time he and Lilly joined the others downstairs; the laughing had died down.

“Brigitta ran away? When? Why didn’t you tell me?” Urs the Worrier wanted to know. Obviously the fact that his 16 year-old daughter had just left the room a few minutes ago and therefore had been found, if in fact she had ever been lost, was of no consequence.

“She was only four, Urs. She was upset at me so she decided to run away. I gave her my duffel bag. She packed some cookies and her sock monkey. It was sooo funny. She sat in the back yard for about two hours, ate all her cookies, and then when dinnertime came she decided that it was time to return home.”

“Now what’s this about an internship, Papi? Don’t tell me our would-be Rock God has decided to hang up his electric guitar!” Karl’s voice may have sounded earnest but the twinkle in his eyes gave him away. He was winding up his Papi.

“Ackshully he’s decided to get a degree in business,” Urs deadpanned.
“Then in a few years when I retire he can be my manager. We plan on getting a band together…return to my roots as it were.”
Urs became more animated as he warmed to the subject. Karl became more wide-eyed and slack-jawed.
“You know how I love leathers. I’ll probably need to get my ear pierced again. What do you think about a tattoo? Too over the top?”

Now it was Susanna’s turn. “We need a name. What about ‘Looli’?” she suggested.

“Looli! Now why didn’t I think of that? The perfect name because this whole idea is crazy. Mami, tell him this idea is crazy!” Karl’s voice rose in panic, his eyes pleading as he looked from one parent to the other.

“Urs, this idea is crazy,” Susanna sputtered as she tried to keep a straight face.

“Ja, Susanna you’re right, we’ll need a different name.” Urs rubbed his chin in contemplation.

“And NO tattoo!” Susanna said sternly.

In the middle of an attempted Carlosesque eyebrow waggle Urs started to lose it. It began as a little bubble of laughter he tried to stifle with his hand. Then a huge guffaw burst forth as Karl shook his head in disgust as he realized he’d been suckered in.

When the laughter had died down and the tears were wiped, Karl tried again, “So what’s the REAL deal with Matt?”

“The first part really was true. Matt is planning on getting a business degree, in International Hospitality and Events Management. In September he’ll be giving up the long hair and earring and joining the establishment so to speak, at the Institute Montreux School of Hotel Management,” Urs said proudly.

“And he’ll be doing a 4-6 month internship each of the four years until he receives his degree,” Susanna beamed with a sigh of relief, happy that Matt’s career goal had finally ‘come to him’.

“Wow! Do you realize some day Matt could be managing the hotel and Jon could be managing the golf course? Just think of the family discount we could get!” Gabe grinned.

“I’ll drink to that!” Urs held up an imaginary glass and looked hopefully at Susanna.

“Good idea, Papi. We’ve been home a whole 24 hours and we haven’t had any hot chocolate,” Gabe whined, making a show of checking his watch.

“I’ll help, Mami. I guess I need to get your recipe. Gabe says mine isn’t sweet enough,” Lilly commented as she followed Susanna into the kitchen.

“And cookies too?” asked Karl with fingers crossed.

“Ja, cookies too,” came the laughing answer in unison as Karl received a grinning thumbs up from his Papi, Gabe, and the twins.

**********

“Bag Boy?”

“Mmmm Houdini.”

“I’ve really missed Jon and Karl you know. They’re just so far away, Jon in Florida and Karl, I never know where he’ll be next doing his ecology thing. One month it’s Sweden, then Norway, or France, or Italy. I’ll be glad when he has his Master degree.”

“Remember, Houdini, what you kept telling me as they were growing up: the children will not live with us forever, not if we do our job now.”

“But sometimes, Bag Boy, I think we did it too good. It just felt so wonderful to have them all around the table together again, laughing, joking, and teasing.”

“And eating your cookies.”

“I can’t believe they ate them all up. I’ll have to find time to bake some more tomorrow.”

“I suppose you’ll hide them again too.”

“Of course.”

“Houdini?”

“Mmmm Bag Boy.”

“I wonder what it would take to persuade you to tell me where.”

“Bag Boy what are you doing?”

“Persuading. Is it working?”

“I'll let you know later, Bag Boy...much later.”