*Twin Lives*

*Twin Lives*


It had been a normal day right up until the last 15 minutes, then our world had been torn apart. Mum and dad had just told us we they were splitting up and that they were each taking one of us to live with them. My name is Else and my twin sister is Jodie, we were 10 years old and we had done everything together, and now we were being forced apart because our parents had decided they didn’t love each other any more.

*A week later*

Everything was sorted, Jodie was going with dad and I was staying with mum. We weren’t moving, but dad and Jodie were moving to London. That was the other end of the world to where mum and I stayed. We lived in Scotland, as far North as you can get. Jodie and I were both hysterical when dad made her get in the car and they drove away. I had a feeling I was never going to see my sister again and it hurt like hell inside, it was like my heart and soul had been ripped out and torn in two.


*10 years later*

Else had moved to London the minute she could legally leave home to try and find Jodie, one day about a year after moving to London she had opened a newspaper and found herself staring at her own face. She read the article quickly and discovered that
her sister had become a musician and was playing with the IL Divo Orchestra on their current tour. She scanned the article for dates of when they were in London and picking up the phone, spent all the money she had on a ticket for every night they were there.

The night had finally come and Else was really nervous about it, she had a good ticket, but went to stand towards the back anyway, not wanting to be too close to the front in case she was spotted. She wanted to see her sister, but didn’t think she could cope with anything else just yet. The lights dimmed and the orchestra started playing. Else stared at them, not seeing Jodie. The guys appeared and the crowd started screaming, then Else went completely still, she had just seen Jodie and she was just as she had remembered her. She looked so happy up there and she was good, very good. She stood transfixed watching her and nobody else. All too soon the show was over and they all disappeared, and the crowd started to leave. She went back to her flat and thanked the lady from next door for looking after Rachael for her. As she got ready for bed all the memories she’d been blocking out for the last four years came flooding back. She watched Rachael sleeping, she was a total innocent in this, she was her three year old daughter and she loved her more than anything in the world, but will never forget how she came to be here.

After dad left, mum got herself a new man within 6 months, but he wasn’t nice and when she’d married him Else wasn’t happy, although he was really nice to her when she was around, the minute we were alone he changed. He made her life hell, took all her confidence away, hit her if he didn’t like something she’d said or done which was most of the time. But the worst time was when he went into her room and raped her. She was 15 years old and the man she had to call dad had just done the worst possible thing he could. She started failing all her subjects at school and eventually just dropped out because no-one liked her and she was constantly bullied by the girls and the boys didn’t even know she existed. She cried herself to sleep most nights and 4 months after the rape found out she was pregnant. She was so unhappy and had thought this would make her mum listen to her about what her husband had done. But when she told her, she’d called her an ungrateful little ***** and said there was no way he would do something like that and that she must be covering up for some boy at school. She stopped talking to her after that unless she wanted something and she knew that she had to get out. She left the day after her 16th birthday. 7 months pregnant with no money and nowhere to live, but she knew where she was going. London to find her sister.

Jodie looked around the flat her dad had just bought for her and couldn’t believe it was hers. It was so big and had so much room that she didn’t know where to start with decorating it. Maybe she would call in an interior designer, dad would pay it for her, he was usually very generous when it came to her. He would do anything for her. They had really fallen on their feet when they had arrived in London, her dad had got a really good job which had come with a fully furnished house and they had never wanted for anything. She remembered when she’d told him she wanted to learn to play the violin. He had just gotten married a couple of months before and her new mum was really nice and they spent a lot of time together and she had persuaded him for Jodie that it would be alright for her to go to the best college for that.

Those had been the best years of her life, she had met so many new people and made so many friends. She had worked really hard and worked her way up through auditions for various orchestras and was now playing for IL Divo on their tour. She still couldn’t believe how much her life had changed in 10 years.

She got ready backstage for the first night in London, her dad and step mum were going to be in the audience somewhere, she was really excited, sitting in her position, the familiar chords starting to play then the guys went on and the crowd screamed so loud. The arena was packed and she couldn’t see past the first couple of rows, but that didn’t matter to her, she just played and lost herself and didn’t really have time to look out into it. The show finally came to an end and backstage the atmosphere was electric, a couple of the guys were going out clubbing but she was going back to the hotel with the others for a drink there. She thought to herself again how wonderful her life was.

Else struggled to wake up as the alarm went off at 6.30am. She quickly switched it off before it could wake Rachael up, she had to get up this early every day and be at work for 7.30am at the café. It was a pretty crappy job with very little pay, but it was the best she could find and she needed to work to keep the flat for her and Rachael. She got ready and left for work knocking on the door next to hers letting the lady know she was away. She always sat with Rachael until she woke up, then she spent the day with her until she came home at night. Since she’d been out late last night at the show, she was extra tired today and wasn’t prepared for the news that hit her when she got to the café. The owners were leaving London and instead of selling it, they were just shutting it down. She was out of work. She felt like crying, she walked home buying a paper with what money she had left to look for a new job. Her neighbour looked surprised to see her back so soon, but said she would see her later as she was going to the show that night too.

She sat down on the bed as Rachael played on the floor with her doll, the only thing Else had taken with her when she’d left home, so she would have something to give the baby. She scanned the paper looking for jobs when she came across an article featuring IL Divo, she read it hoping it might tell her something about Jodie, but it didn’t mention her. She carried on and saw an add for a courier delivering parcels and letters to people. She circled it, then dialled the number and got herself an interview. Now all she had to do was make herself look at least half decent which was hard with her clothes. Most of them were years old and all tattered. She would just have to hope for the best. She hadn’t had much luck in the past, but maybe it was all about to change.

Then she turned her thoughts to seeing Jodie last night, it had been great, but she looked so happy, like she’d had a really good life and she wasn’t sure how she felt about that. The day past quick and she got ready to go out to the show that night, she was going to stand a bit nearer the stage tonight, just to see her a bit closer, see if she notices her.

Jodie laughed as she put the phone down, it had been Urs calling to say he was going to pick her up in half an hour, because he needed her advice on what to get his mum for her birthday!! He never bought anything for his mum without someone there holding his hand, he was hopeless and out of all the guys in the group she had quickly formed a close friendship with him. But they were going to have dinner out before the show as well, so it should be fun. Urs arrived and they spent a wonderful day shopping where they got his mum a wonderful present and he bought her a gorgeous necklace to thank her. If anyone had seen them together they would think they were a very happy couple! But they’re could never be anything between them, they were just like brother and sister. But David, now there’s a guy she would quite happily settle down with!

They arrived at the arena early and practised some of the dance moves on stage then went backstage and just chilled until the others got there, then all the fun starts, when Steve starts shouting because David and Seb keep disappearing, they play pranks on the poor wardrobe and make up ladies, it’s all part of the atmosphere and Jodie loved being a part of it.

Rachael slept for a few hours, giving Else the chance to shower and get herself organised for tonight. She had loved her sister fiercely, protecting her above her own fears. She was the oldest, born 5 minutes before Jodie. Whether that was what made her so protective over her sister she didn’t know.
Her life must have been so different.
Her’s had gone from bad to worse.
Her new step dad was a brutal man, the only thing good he had done for her had been to give her Rachael.
But then that had been the worst thing of her life.
He had raped her, taken her virginity, used her for his own pleasure and then left her crying.
She had counted down the minutes until she could leave home.
Come down from Scotland and be here.
Find Jodie.

But would she remember her, had she thought about her over the years, or forgotten her.
She dropped Rachael off with Rose, her neighbour. She had been a godsend, someone she could rely on to help her. Rachael idolised her, Aunty Rose, she called her.
‘Look Else, don’t rush back. Rachael can stay here tonight. Have some fun.’ Rose told her, her heart going out to her. She really felt for this young woman. She knew she was only 20 but she had a great sadness about her, and she looked older than her years. She needed some fun, some spark. But she knew she would never find it. She was scared of living, scared of what life might offer her.

Jodie on the other hand was high as a kite. The guys had been causing havoc, and she had found herself alone with David.
‘So Mr Millar, any misbehaving tonight?’ She asked him, flirting with him.
‘Well, Jodie. We’ll have to wait and see. You know how I like a bit of a challenge.’ He replied, making her grin. His arms slipped round her waist, pulling her to him, ‘When you going to stop fighting me and let me make an honest woman of you Jodie?’ He asks her, his voice changing, the real David talking.
‘I know how you like a challenge Davie.’ She told him, kissing his lips, teasing him. They stood there, the kiss getting passionate, then Urs appeared, ‘Oh for God’s sake you two, get a room please.’ he said, laughing. They were both as bad as each other.
‘David, we’ve got to get ready. 20 minutes guys, go Jodie, now.’ Urs said, chasing her from the dressing room. Jodie laughed and blew a kiss to each of them as she went.
‘That is one crazy woman.’ Urs laughed, ’But one of the nicest girls I know.’ he finished, handing David’s shirt to him.
‘Yeah she is. But she wont commit to me, she keeps messing about with me.’ He says, sitting down heavily and looking in the mirror as he let the hair stylist Maarit sort his hair out.
‘David, leave the poor girl alone. Who in their right mind would want go out with such a horrible guy.’ She laughs, then Caroline walks in holding his suit, ’Yeah, poor girl, must be drugged or something. I mean you are seriously ugly David.’ Caroline threw in.
‘So what’s this? Get at David night or something.’ He said throwing out his bottom lip, making it quiver.
‘Oh God look at that face. How can anyone refuse him anything when he looks like that?’ Maarit says to Caroline, as she fusses around after Urs. Seb and Carlos walk in, grinning
as they catch the end of the conversation. ‘How’s ugly bloke tonight then?‘ Carlos asks, ducking as a pillow fly’s at him from David’s direction.
Then it’s time to go.
Steve walks them to the side of the stage. The band and orchestra are just getting ready to go on. Jodie waves and smiles, she’s getting herself syked up, preparing for the nerves that would appear anytime now. She was petrified the first night she had gone out there, sure she was going to mess up. But now she was perfect. She loved what she did and was so grateful for her life. Other thoughts threatened to push into her head then, but she pushed them down, now wasn’t the moment.
Then the music started, the guys walked out and the crowd screamed.

Else sat in the 4th row. Her heart beating so fast. She shouldn’t have sat here, she should have stayed hidden. I mean they were identical, Else and Jodie. Both tallish, slim, and the hair exactly the same colour, a deep rich auburn.
Their eyes had been the one give away.
Jodie’s a rich deep brown. Warm chocolate, that went black when she was cross, or upset. But Else’s were blue. The colour of the ocean. They glittered an sparkled when she thought about Rachael, but at other times they were just blue. They did turn grey when she was upset or annoyed. And then silver if she was really pissed off. They had been silver the day she had hidden the knife under her pillow, so the next time her step father had come to her, she had pulled it out on him. Telling him she wasn’t afraid to use it. Anywhere would be better than living here. Even prison. After that he had ignored her.
She was pulled from her bitter memories as the lights went down. Then the music started playing.
She sat mesmerised as the guys came out, and then she saw Jodie again. She had never really taken much notice of IL Divo, but she had to admit they were nice looking guys. Jodie was the one who could play the instruments. She was a natural. They both had been good at it, but Else had had the singing voice, and Jodie the musical talent. But then Else hadn’t used her voice in ten years. She’d had no reason too since her twin went. She had stopped living that day. Now she only lived for Rachael.
The guys were sitting on the front of the stage, singing a powerful ballad.
The lyrics powerful, ‘I used to think that i was strong, i realise now i was wrong
cause everytime i see your face, my mind becomes an empty space.’
For some reason the words struck her, she felt a tear slide down her face. Then suddenly she’s aware of a pair of eyes looking at her, and a face registering shock. One of the guys had spotted her. He looks at her, his face amazed. As the song finishes and the guys walk off as the band plays, she stands and walks away, hiding once more in the shadows.

‘Seb, Seb!! Did you see her. In the 4th row. Spitting image of Jodie.’ David was babbling at him.
Seb looked at him, ‘David, calm down.’ he said, the other guys moving round him.
‘In the 4th row, in the middle. A women who looks the spitting image of Jodie’ He said again.
‘Maybe she’s got a twin.’ Urs joked.
‘Ok guys lets go.’ He said, chasing the others back onto stage.
David thought he would have to tell her after the show was done but when the show was over he had forgotten all about her.

Else stood at the back and watched, her face wet with tears. A guy walked up to her, ‘Not that bad love is it?’ he asked, but she ran. The guy looking at her had freaked her out. She needed to get home, get back to her little world. This was dangerous.
She ran, not looking where she was going. Suddenly she runs full pelt into a broad back, falling back on the floor, crying in pain as her arm bends under her. He turns and stares. Else looks at him, aware of a dull throb in her wrist. He’s a big bloke, wearing an official pass. His eyes widen, then narrow, ‘you ok love.’ He asks, bending down, offering her his hand. She scrambles to her feet without talking, moving back from him. Cradling her arm in her hand. ‘I’m, I’m sorry. I had to get out. Can’t bear it anymore.’ she said, turning to run. He grabs her arm, turning her to him, making her cry out in pain. The arm broken.
She falls towards him. Leaning on him.
‘Come on love. You need looking at. I think that arm is broken.’ he says, putting an arm round her shoulders. She tenses as he does, he feels her and eases off. She walks slowly, almost dragging her feet.
‘I can’t. I can’t go back there. I’ll see her. I can’t see her.’ She panics, pulling back from the door fast approaching.
‘See who love?’ he asks. ‘look, I’m Steve. IL Divo’s tour manager. Who can’t you see?’ suddenly she’s crying again, not believing this. Steve realises it’s probably a bit of shock and walks her through the back stage door with out her realising. ‘Steve, where you been?’ A voice says, ‘And what are you doing with Jodie?’
They watch as the girl next to Steve collapses in a heap. The shock from the events tonight too much. She passes out, landing heavily on the cold floor.

Steve looks at Carlos and say’s “This isn‘t Jodie, she was in the crowd and I found her in tears and when I asked her if she was okay she ran away and fell over, I think she’s broken her arm.” Then he lifts her into his arms and takes her into a room and lays her down on the couch. “Can you call an ambulance for me? I don’t want to leave her, she’s upset enough without her waking up and finding someone else staring at her.” Carlos goes to do what he asks, but before he leaves the room says “Well, if it’s not Jodie, who is it? Because she sure looks identical to Jodie.” then he leaves the room. Steve stands there thinking about what Carlos just said, looked down at Else then the door opens and in walks Jodie. “Hey Steve, Carlos said you had someone from the crowd in here that had collapsed.” she said. “Just wondered if you needed a hand?” She said brightly, then when she saw who was lying on the couch her whole face went pale.

She sat down before she fell down and put her hand over her mouth. Steve looked at her and was about to speak when Else came round and tried to sit up saying “I can’t be here, she’ll see me, I can’t let her see me.” She sits up and looks straight into Jodie’s brown eyes. If it was possible for her face to go any paler than it was, then it did. “Jodie” she said. “Else, what are you doing here?” Steve is looking really confused and says to Jodie “I take it you two know each other because I haven’t a clue what’s going on here.” Jodie regaining some of her composure says “Else is my twin sister, I haven’t see her for 10 years. When our parents split up they each took one of us, I went with dad and she stayed with mum, we were devastated that they were splitting us up.” she looks at Else then says “I never thought I’d ever see you again.”

Carlos comes back in to tell them the ambulance is on its way and does a double take when he see both Jodie and Else. “What’s going on here? He asks. Else who has just realised what Carlos said say’s “I can’t go to hospital, I’ve got to go home.” she stands up and tries to walk away but Jodie stops her and looks deep into her eyes then says “Else, what’s happened to you in the last 10 years? Because there is no happiness in your eyes, just deep pain, sadness and loneliness.”
“Please let me go home, I need to get ready, I have a job interview tomorrow and I have to be at home tonight” Else say’s ignoring Jodie. “Else please, talk to me. I’ve spent the last 10 years blocking the fact that you were out there somewhere from my mind because it was too painful to think about, I missed you so much.

Then I made some friends, started playing violin and it became easier to forget you existed, but you’re here now and I am so happy to see you.” pleads Jodie.
Else looks at her with cold eyes and says “You may have forgotten I existed, had a perfect life here with daddy, good job and everything that goes with it. But, my life went from bad to worse when you left, you can’t imagine some of the things I’ve had to put up with, and the only thing that kept me going was becoming old enough so I could leave home and come looking for you, my sister who I love so much and that’s why I was here tonight, I was here last night too.”

“You obviously don’t care about me anymore, so let me go and I’ll stay out of your life forever. I have to go home to the only person I know truly loves me.” shouts Else getting really upset. She picks up her bag with her sore arm and immediately drops it again as pain shoots through it and cry’s out in pain. Steve looks between both of them and sees that nothing is going to stop Else from leaving, so he suggests that he goes to the hospital with her and gets her arm seen to then drives her to her flat. Else looks at him gratefully and Jodie still shocked at what she just heard from Else lets them go.

After Steve and Else had left, Jodie sank down into the nearest chair and let all the thoughts she’d been forcing out of her mind for the last 10 years to come flooding back. She never heard the door open and David, who was unaware of what had just happened, came in and said “So this is where you’re hiding, are you ready to go? The others are all waiting outside.” It’s only then he notices how she looks and say’s “Jodie babe’s, what’s the matter? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” She looks up at him and say’s “In a way I have, do you have time to talk? I really need to talk to someone.” He looks at her and realises that she has to get something of her chest and that it could be very hard for her. “Sure babe, I’ll just let the others know we’re not coming and we’ll go back to the hotel and talk.” He takes out his phone and let’s the others know him and Jodie are going to just head back to the hotel because she’s not feeling too good, then he hangs up and say’s “Come on then, let’s go.”

Steve and Else sat in silence all the way to the hospital, got her arm seen to, she had broken it. After she’d had her cast put on and was told to come back in 6 weeks to get it removed, they took a car back to Else’s flat. After she’d let them both in, she’d decided not to bother waking Rose and Rachael, Steve looked around the small flat, not much in it at all, just a kitchen, a toilet and a room which looked like a bedroom/sitting room. There was no tv, just a small radio. “Do you live here by yourself?” he asked. Else looked at him and said “No, I have a three year old daughter called Rachael. She’s next door just now, my neighbour Rose looks after her for me when I’m at work or out at night. Else looked at his face and said “It’s not that bad, at least it’s mine and nobody can hurt me in here.”
“Else, you can talk to me if you want to, you know that. I’ve known Jodie for a while now and although she was always happy, I could tell there was something that wasn’t right. She never talked about her past, we only know about what she’s done since she came to London. She never talks about her mum and we certainly didn’t know about you.” Else looked up at him and decided she there was something about him that she thought she could trust, so she said “Do you have all night? Cos it’s a very long story.”

Steve sat down, made himself comfortable and said “I’m here for as long as you want hun.” “Okay” Else said sitting down and pulling her knees up under her chin. “It started 10 years ago, it was just another normal day, me and Jodie had gone to school and were on our way home, we did everything together, had done for as long as I could remember, when we got home they’re was lot’s of shouting and when they saw us they sat us down and very calmly told us that they were getting divorced, because they didn’t love each other anymore. Dad then said that he was moving to London and he was taking one of us with him. We started crying and said he couldn’t split us up, we were a pair and we belonged together. We ran upstairs and must have just sat on one of the beds hugging each other and crying all night. We weren’t going to let them do this.” She looked at Steve who said “Carry on, I’ll just listen till you’ve finished then I’ll tell you what I think.” he smiled. “Well, it all happened a week later, dad had the suitcases packed and sitting at the door when we got home from school. He told Jodie to get in the car because they were leaving straight away. She refused to go, started screaming and crying and I started too, Dad had to drag her into the car while mum held me back, we were hysterical and all I could see for years was my last image of her. Her face looking out of the back window, tears running down her face.” Else said, tears starting to run down her face as the pain of reliving it starts to hit her.

David and Jodie arrived at the hotel and went straight up to his room. They made themselves comfortable each sitting on a bed and then he said “So, what is it that you need to talk about babe?”
Jodie looked at him and said very slowly “I have a twin sister whom I haven’t seen for 10 years and she turned up tonight. She was in the crowd, she’d had an accident and Steve had brought her backstage cause he thought she’d broken her arm.” “Seb said he’d seen a girl identical to you in the 4th row tonight, but when I looked she’d gone.” said David. “That must have been her, why haven’t you seen her for 10 years?” he asked.

“I don’t know if I can talk about it, I’ve pushed all those memories to the back of my mind for so long now and when I saw her tonight, they all came flooding back and I remembered the pain of the night we were separated.” Jodie started. “Her name’s Else and we were 10 when our parents told us they were getting divorced and that dad was leaving and taking one of us with him. Else and I were hysterical, told them they couldn’t split us up as we were a pair and came together. We’d been inseparable for 10 years and then we were being forced apart. We went up to our room and must have spent the rest of the night on one of our beds hugging each other and crying. We weren’t going to let them do this. A week later we came home from school and dad had the suitcases sitting at the door and he said that I was going with him to live in London. He told me to get in the car cause we were leaving straight away. I refused to do it, started screaming and crying and so did Else. Dad had to drag me into the car while mum held Else back. The last image I have of her is seeing her through the back window with tears running down her face as we got further away from her.” She started crying then and David pulled her into his arms and waited for them to stop.

Once she’d stopped she carried on. “We arrived in London and dad had got a job lined up which provided a house, I remember thinking how me and Else would have had so much fun in it, it was massive. Dad did really well and earned enough money to keep us well, then he met this women whom he later married. She was lovely, almost like a new mum. I started to get used to my new life, made some good friends and gradually began pushing all thoughts of Else and mum out of my mind because it was too painful to think about them.”

~~~~~~~~~~

“Mum never talked about Jodie or dad again, but I never got over losing her. I felt lopsided without her at my side, like I wasn’t whole. I went through the routine of living and coped with it that way, but 6 months after dad had left mum got herself a new guy whom she eventually married. He was a really horrible guy, he was really nice to me when mum was about, but when she wasn’t he would hit me and talk down to me, insult me, generally taking all my confidence away. He would make me do all these nasty chores for him and I shut myself away from people altogether. My grades at school started to suffer and the girls would bully me constantly while the boys never even noticed I existed. Eventually I just dropped out, there was no reason for me to stay anymore.” said Else looking up at Steve.

She looked at Steve, trying to judge his reaction. Could she tell him about what her step dad had done to her, that night. The event that had led up to her leaving, she looked at him, he was a nice guy, but she didn’t want to tell him everything just yet. He looked at her and stood. Then he pulled out a pen and paper and jotted something down.
‘If you need me here’s my number. Please ring me Else. I’ll do what I can to help you.’ he said, then he hugged her, kissing her head and left. She went to bed and cried, she had seen her sister, and she had tried to forget about her. She spent a fitful night, once again being torn apart from people she loved. Else was there, as was Rachael. But then IL Divo filtered through too.

‘Must have been awful.’ David said, pulling Jodie close to him.
‘It was and now she thinks I hate her. I forgot about her. But I didn’t David, honest, I didn’t. I just couldn’t deal with how I felt.’ She sobbed, and he pulled her into his arms, holding her tight.
‘I know babe, I know. Steve’s taken care of her, so he’ll have her address. Tomorrow we’ll go and see her, Ok. See how she is.’
Jodie nodded, wiping her eyes, ‘Thanks David, that would be amazing. I want to see her, explain.’
‘Yeah I know hunny, but it might not be easy.’ David told her, stroking her hair as she leant against him. ‘lets go to sleep and then in the morning we’ll see Steve. Maybe he’ll have some idea what to do.’
They laid down together, although they weren’t ‘together’
David had spent time with her over the course of the tour, flirting with her innocently, but not knowing how she really felt about him. She snuggled into him, smelling his masculinity.
‘Do you know how much I’ve wanted to do this with you David.’ She said, not daring to look at him, ‘I’ve often dreamt of sleeping in your arms, feeling your lips on my skin, kissing you. I like you David, a lot.’ She said.
A finger tilted her head upwards, until she was staring into a pair of intense blue eyes.
Then his lips meet hers, kissing her, sending sparks through her body.
‘I like you a lot too Jodie.’ he told her, pulling her to him, they spent the night in each others arms, loving each other.

Next morning Jodie and David sat talking with Steve, he looked at them, ‘She’s had a rough time Jodie, not like you. Her new step dad was a nasty piece of work, there’s a lot of damage there, she’ll need gentle handling.’ he looked at her, wondering how she would take the next piece of information, ‘Jodie, she’s got a daughter, a 3 year old girl.’
‘I’m an auntie.’ She asked, her voice quiet. Steve simply shook his head, ‘Yeah, her flat is tiny, she’s very short of money and now with her arm it’s going to be worse. She cant work, but she’s terribly proud, so she wont accept any handouts either.’ he paused, thinking about how was the best way to do this, ‘I’ll take you round and stay, she seems to trust me.’ Jodie nodded, holding tight to David’s hand, Steve looked at them, ‘I take it this means you two got it together.’ he asks, his face serious.
‘Yeah Steve, you ok about it.’ David asks,
‘Well, just keep it quiet, but I trust you both so just be careful and don‘t let Simon find out.’

**************

Else woke up feeling awful.. Her head ached, her arm was stiff and sore and she really wished she could stay in bed. Rachael was due back any time so she had to get up.
She struggled to wash and get dressed, suddenly realising how much work it would be with her broken arm. She managed to get dressed and then pick up Rachael from Rose’s.
‘What happened to your arm Else?’ Rose enquired, looking at the cast.
‘Oh I fell over last night and broke it.’ Else said, then thanking Rose she took Rachael back to her flat.
‘Mummy, you hurt your arm?’ She asked, cuddling her mum. Else fought the tears, as the door bell rang. She stood up and brushed the hair from her face. She opened the door and stood looking at her twin. The tears fell, relieved that she hadn’t been forgotten again. She cried as Jodie pulled her into an embrace. Steve ushered them into the flat and closed the door. The girls hugged and cried together.

David and Steve looked up as a little girl walked in, she looked at her mum, tears forming in her eyes. David got to his knees, ‘Hi sweetheart, you must be Rachael.’ he said, holding a hand out to the little girl. She was cute, a smaller version of the twins, her brown hair long and tied in a pony tail, her brown eyes wide, full of wonder.
‘Mummy?’ She asked, looking from Else to Jodie,
‘Hi darling, mummy’s here.’ Else said, picking Rachael up with her good arm.
Rachael looked from Else to Jodie, ‘Mummy, she looks just like you.’ She said, pointing to Jodie,
‘Don’t point sweety, it’s rude. I know she does, that’s my sister, Jodie, she’s your Aunty, Aunty Jodie.’ Else said. Steve looked around, seeing the little damp flat, then he made a decision, the sisters needed some time and he knew the way to do it.
‘Else, have you rang work about your arm?’
‘What work, Steve, I lost the interview, they weren’t willing to wait.’ She said sadly,
‘Ok then, pack a bag for you both, we’ve got a couple of weeks left of the tour. You two need some time to get to know each other and Else need someone to help her. If she wants she can help in wardrobe, Caroline always says she needs some more help.’
Else looked at him, her eyes wide, not quite believing this, ‘I can’t.’ She stuttered,
‘I can’t leave here. I need to find a job or else I’ll lose this place.’ She said, getting panicky.
‘Else,’ Jodie said, ‘Please, I really want to get back together. I want to show you around, introduce you to my friends.’
‘Why? Too rub it in. Show them the poor sister, the one who was raped by her stepfather at 16 and then was kicked out when she told her mum.’ Else said, rushing into the bedroom, leaving a stunned silence behind her. Jodie collapsed into tears in David’s arms, and Steve turned and went to Else, he felt for this girl, so much hurt in her life already.
‘Else, come here.’ he said, pulling her into a hug. ‘It’s nothing like that with Jodie, trust me, she wants you near her, she doesn’t want to show off, she wants to get to know her sister again.’ Else looked at him, ‘Do you mean that. Promise me that she’ll not flaunt what she’s got.’ She says, not wanting to be reminded of her own tough upbringing compared to Jodie‘s.
‘No she’s wouldn’t, she’s not like that. It seems that you’ve got to get to know her as well.’ he said, holding her at arms length and looking at her, she smiled, ‘Ok Steve, for you and for me.’ She said, getting up and getting a bag packed with her and Rachael’s stuff.

Else had been with the guys and Jodie for a week now and she had to admit she was loving the opportunity to get to know her sister again and Rachael was being spoilt rotten by everyone, especially Urs. They’d only know each other for a week, but they’d had a connection straight away and she spent most of her time with him when he wasn’t rehearsing. She was helping out in wardrobe with Caroline, although she was limited with what she could do with only one arm. She still hadn’t sat down properly with Jodie and talked about everything that had happened since they’d been split up, but they were getting there slowly. Her best friend and the guy she trusted more than any of them though was Steve. She spent a lot of time talking with him and he always knew how she was feeling and what to say to make her feel better.

She was in the wardrobe room ironing the boys clothes for the show that night when Steve came in. She looks up at him and smiles. “How you doing Else?” he asked. “Well, I’ve learned it’s easier to iron with two good arms rather than one!” she replied. Steve laughed then said “Not quite what I meant! How are you? How are you getting on with Jodie?”
She sat down and sighed. “It’s hard Steve, harder than I thought it would be, everyone’s been really nice to me and Urs adores Rachael and vice versa. But things are tough between Jodie and I. We do talk, but not about the past and not about what happened to either of us. I just can’t get what she said that first night out of my head.” *It became easier to forget you existed* “How could she do that, after the way we were ripped apart, we vowed never to forget each other.” She looked up at Steve and he saw that her eyes were wet with tears.

He pulled her into a tight hug and said “Right, what you have to do is go for a meal together and sit down, talk about everything you want to talk about, get it all out in the open, tell her how your life was after she’d gone, all about Rachael and let her hear from you how your life was. Then she’ll maybe start talking about her life, once one of you start talking you’ll both want to know everything. After tonight’s show, I’ll book a table for you.”
“But Rachael” Else started to say. “Urs can babysit Rachael” Johnny said. Audrey smiled then said “Okay, but I want to tell her about this, yeah.”


Jodie was on the stage practising by herself when David came up behind her and caught her round the waist pulling her backwards into him. Once they had both landed on the floor he turned her round so she was facing him and kissed her on the lips. “David, not here” she squealed. “You know nobody’s supposed to know yet!”
“I’m sorry babe, but you just looked so irresistible standing there like that” he laughed. Jodie slapped him playfully on the shoulder and said “Don’t be so damn cheeky!”
David looked at her and said seriously “How you doing, really? With Else here and Rachael.” She looked up at him and he could see the pain in her eyes. “I don’t know David, I didn’t think it would be this hard, I mean she’s my twin sister, we used to do everything together. We couldn’t be separated. Now its so hard to even speak to her.”
“I’m glad that Steve seems to have taken her under his wing, she’ll be fine with him around.”
“Give it time babe, she needs to get used to things, according to Steve, her life’s not been good. You should make time to talk to her properly, get all these feelings out in the open, see what happens then.” David replied.


Just then Steve walks onto the stage and they spring apart until they realise it’s just him. But Else walks in behind him and can’t hide the look on her face when she sees David and Jodie on the floor looking guilty. She turns to walk away again, but Steve grabs her and say’s “Don’t worry about what you’re seeing, these two have only just got together and no-one knows about it yet, that’s why they’re looking guilty. They probably thought they’d been caught out!” Tell Jodie what you came to tell her.
Else looked at her and said “I was wondering if you would like to go for some dinner after the show tonight? I think it would do us some good to talk about things and not just avoid the subject like we have for the past week. Urs has said he will look after Rachael for me. Jodie looked at David and Steve who both nodded and then said “I think that’s a great idea, we need to talk, it’s been hard to do it round here, plus as you say we’ve been avoiding the subject.” “I’ll meet you after the shows over and we can get a taxi to take us back to the hotel and we can eat there, that ok?” Else nodded her head and then walked away.


The boys put on another brilliant performance that night although it seemed to pass more quickly than usual. Probably because both girls were really nervous about being left alone with each other. Then the time had come and Else was standing waiting at the arena door as Jodie walked up having showered and changed. “Hey, you ready to go?” she said. “Yeah, ready as I’ll ever be.” said Else. Jodie’s face went pale as she suddenly remembered that they had always said that to each other when they were young. She had asked if Else was ready to go and she had always replied with “Yeah, ready as I’ll ever be.”

They got a taxi, climbed in and Jodie explained that she’d just remembered their saying and that’s why she’d gone pale. Else smiled and said “Hopefully that won’t be the only thing we remember tonight then.”
They sat in silence during the drive to the hotel then got out and walked into the hotel going straight to the dining room. They sat down and ordered what they wanted and then Else said “ So, do you want to start or shall I?” Jodie looked at her and said “You start, I want to hear about your life after I’d gone. Tell me everything, please.”
“Okay” Else started. “But I’ll warn you, some of it’s not nice. In fact most of it’s not nice.” Jodie looked down at the table, unable to look at her sister.
“Well, that day we were split up, I just sat on the ground for hours after dad had driven away just staring at the road ahead with tears running down my face. Mum tried to get me to come in, but I wouldn’t go. Eventually I picked myself up and went into the house to see mum. She’d been crying too and she hugged me and I thought things weren’t going to get any worse. Else said.

“But, things were only like that for a few months. I would go to school and just keep myself to myself, I didn’t mix with anyone. I would go home and mum would be there with something to cheer me up. Then one day I came home and she wasn’t there. Our neighbour had been asked to keep an eye out for me. *remember Mrs Burne? We used to call her stinky because there was always a weird smell coming from her house.* Well, I had to go in there and wait for mum to come home and when she did she brought this horrible man with her, James. Said she’d been seeing him for a couple of weeks now and he was coming to live with us.” Said Else.

“I was devastated. Didn’t know how mum could do this, just replace dad like nothing had happened. I wasn’t happy at dad leaving, but I hadn’t wanted mum to replace him.
Anyway, he seemed okay when mum was around, but when she wasn’t around he would make me do things for him, run errands, clean the house etc. I was still only 10 at the time. This went on for years, mum ended up marrying the guy and he became my step dad.” Else stopped as the waiter brought their food over.

Starting again she said “ I had virtually given up trying at school, my grades were slipping so badly, I was being bullied by nearly all the girls and ignored by all the guys. My self esteem and confidence had shrunk so much that I eventually just gave up on school and dropped out. Mum lost her temper with me so bad that day, she actually hit me, the first time she had ever done that. I was determined not to give her cause to do it again. I had thought it was my fault, because I was letting her down. So, I was 15 then just about to turn 16, I decided to get a job. Which wasn’t going to be easy with no qualifications or experience. The only thing I was good at was cleaning houses and waiting on James.”

She paused and looked at Jodie who was really pale in the face, and looked like she had tears in her eyes. Else put her hand over Jodie’s and told her not to worry.
“Do you want me to continue?” she asked. Jodie nodded her head, she didn’t think she could speak without bursting into tears. How had she not known she was having such a hard time, she thought to herself. I should have picked up on it, like twins always know when the other is in danger. I should have made an effort to go find her when I got older, not just forgotten about her because my life was really good and I expected hers to be as well.

She picked up her head and listened to Else who had started talking again. “I got a job in the local supermarket, *you remember Greene’s? The shop with the lovely old man behind the counter?* Well, I stacked shelves and worked behind the counter there, it was the best part of my day when I was there, cos people were nice to me. But that didn’t last long, James came in one day and started causing a fuss and making me look bad and the old man said he was very sorry, but he couldn’t afford any trouble and he would have to let me go. I was back to where I had started.

Just when I thought things couldn’t get much worse, mum came home one day and said she was going to start working the nightshifts at the local factory, which meant me being alone in the house with James all night. The first few nights were okay, but then one night he came rolling in from the pub totally drunk and he barged his way into my bedroom and forced me to touch him. That’s all it was at first, for months, every night he’d come into my room and make me do things that I knew a step dad had no right to make his 16yr old step daughter do. The times he was drunk weren’t so bad. I could just push him aside and get away. But when he wasn’t drunk, he was so strong and I couldn’t get away from him.”

Else who had been staring at the table the whole time she’d been talking looked up and saw silent tears running down Jodie’s face. She got up and gave her a hug. “I’m sorry.” said Jodie. “If I’d known how bad your life was, I’d have come looking for you, took you away from it all.” Else smiled and said “the only thing that had been keeping me going was the thought of getting out and finding you one day.”
She sat back down in her own seat and waited til the waiter had taken their plates away and said they didn’t want pudding.

“Shall we go upstairs and finish talking up there or do you want to go into the bar?” asked Else. “I think we should go into the bar, I think I need a drink.” said Jodie
So they moved into the bar, got a drink and sat down.
“It stopped for a while then and I thought maybe he’d given up and I was only a few months of hitting 17 and then I was legally entitled to leave home and I was coming to London to find you. But that night, that night he arrived home sober but in a terrible rage, I’d just gone to bed and knew what was coming, so I tried to block the door so he couldn’t get in. That just made him worse, after he’d got into my room he’d thrown me back against the wall hard and stuck his hand up my pyjama top. I tried to push him away, but he was too strong and I just gave up trying to struggle, it was just making him more mad. I lay there tears running down my face as he raped me.” Else took a large drink of her wine and continued without looking at Jodie.

“It stopped after that, I think he realised he’d gone too far, he never looked at me again and never bothered with me. Life got slightly easier knowing he wasn’t going to annoy me anymore. That was until three days after my 17th birthday when I was discovered I was pregnant. My world just shattered. I tried to tell mum everything that had happened and told her I was pregnant and she went mental at me saying that James wouldn’t do anything like that and that he was a good man and I was obviously using him to cover up for somebody else. But I had never slept with anyone else. That bastard had been my first and only time which is why I knew it was definitely his. Mum threw me out then, said she’d had enough of me, I’d changed over the last seven years and she’d finally had enough.

I was so glad to get out of that house and I knew where I was going, I was heading for London. I was three months pregnant with no money, but at least I knew where I was going. I worked my way down the country for three years until I got to London. I lived in ****ty little flats although once Rachael came along I had to adapt my lifestyle. I started eating less, so Rachael could have more, I had to rely on the kindness of the people I worked for to let me take her with me. When I reached London, I met the most wonderful lady. She lived next door to me and was my godsend. Rachael was three by then and Rose, the lady next door would keep her for free for me while I went to work. Rachael calls her Aunty Rose.”

She looked up as she said that and saw Jodie wince at the mention of someone else being called Aunty.

“When I opened a newspaper one day, I saw me staring out at me. I read the article which was about you and how you were playing with a band called IL Divo.. And it gave the tour dates, so I called up and got a ticket for all the nights you were going to be there. I spent all the money I had, which wasn’t much especially since I’d been fired a couple of hours before. The first night came around and I was so nervous, I left Rachael with Rose and went to the concert, I stood right at the back so you couldn’t see me and when I spotted you, I thought my heart had stopped. I just stood transfixed and watched you all night. Then you were gone. I went back to my flat, picked up Rachael and went to bed. The following day I phoned and made an appointment for an interview and then once again left Rachael with Rose and went to the concert.

I stood nearer the front this time and watched you again until I was spotted by Carlos. I think I scared him more than he scared me. I ran away to the back of the building and burst into tears. This guy came up to me and said It’s not that bad is it? That was Steve. He tried to take me through he back but I was adamant I didn’t want you to see me, so I ran away and that’s when I fell over and broke my arm. He carried me backstage which is where I met you for the first time in ten years. The moment I’d longed for, for so long. And you said you’d just put me out of your mind and forgotten I’d existed. I was devastated. This was all I’d lived for the last ten years and now here it was, and you didn’t want to know me.”
Else looked up at Jodie and saw the tears running down her face, and she started crying too.

Jodie watched Else as she tells her her story. She feels her heart ache for the things her twin went through. She wondered why she hadn’t felt it. They had always had a strong bond when they were younger, but then with the split and everything, the link must have been broken. Jodie reached out, her hand going over Else‘s.
‘I’m so sorry.’ She said, ‘I had no idea. I couldn’t bear being separated, and just blocked out my heart. I shut it off to you, so I wouldn’t hurt any more. I think that was the only way I could carry on. I feel so guilty now. My life has been so different to yours. I’m almost ashamed to tell you about it.’ Jodie looked at her twin. It was uncanny, looking into a living mirror.
‘Please Jodie. Tell me. I want to know how you got in with IL Divo.’ she said, attempting to smile at me, but I could see the sadness in her eyes. ‘Please Jode.’ She said, using the name she had when we were children, ‘and how did you snare ole blue eyes.’ She said, I laughed, that was my favourite expression for him.
‘Ok, I watched you standing there as we drove away. I cried all the way. Dad did too. He told me he wanted to have us both but mum wouldn’t let him. So they decided to take one each. The trip to London was horrible, even now I can’t do that journey without feeling sad.

Well, dad had this job all lined up. That was part of the reason mum and dad split. He was offered this job Else. I mean it was amazing. He was offered a partnership in a big law firm. Mum refused to leave Scotland. They argued about it for ages, then mum told dad to go, if it meant that much to him. He did, he hadn’t been happy for a long time.

The job offered him everything. A huge house, he’s still there. It was amazing. Even had a pool. For the first few months I stayed in my room, crying. I refused to do anything, he made me see a children’s physiologist, who talked it through with me. Eventually, I hid you away. Closed you in a little corner of my heart. I didn’t forget you Else. I just put you away until I could face you again. Face my guilt about losing you.’

I was silent, the tears wet on my face. I was so ashamed of the luxury I had had, but Else wanted to hear all about it. ‘Well I finally decided to face the world. It had been 6 months and I was a shadow of my former self. I had lost so much weight and dad was so worried about me. I came down one morning told him I was ready to live again. He grinned and hugged me, ‘I was scared I was going to lose you as well.’ he said to me that morning.

We went looking at schools. Dad wanted me to go to private school, I said no, normal school was fine. But we compromised, after spending a year in a comprehensive school dad talked me into going to a private school, that specialised in music. Well, you know what we were like at school, you singing and me playing anything I could get my hands on’ I grinned at her, ‘Yeah, we were. I remember that.’ Auds agreed.
‘Well, I started at that school and loved it, from there I went onto a college that specialised in the type of music I wanted to do.

Then Dad met this amazing woman called Kristen. She was younger than him by 6 years, and we hit it off straight away. But then walking in with the complete set of Take That CD’s for me, who could blame me. I loved them so much. Anyway, her and dad were great and they married after 18 months. They’re still together and painfully happy. Embarrassingly so.’ I stopped, looking at her, she was digesting it all slowly. I looked up as the guys walked in, coming over to us. David looked from me to Else, ‘Its amazing girls, but seeing you both together like this is mind blowing.’ He said, ‘May we join you or do you want us to leave you to it.’

I looked at Else, ‘I think I’d like that guys. Come and join us. Jodie is just telling me about her life.’ She said sadly, ‘it’s very different to what mine was.’ I felt a tear slip down my face then, I hadn’t wanted her to think I was rubbing it in.
‘I’m so sorry Else. I didn’t mean to upset you.’ I tell her, squeezing her hand.
‘Hey, it’s ok. It’s just a shock to actually hear it that’s all.’ she looked at the guys, ‘So how did you get stuck with this lot.’ She asks as they all gape at her.
‘Excuse me, but I think it’s us who got lumbered with her.’ Urs complained, pulling a chair up and sitting next to Else. She looked at him and grinned.

‘You Ok babe?’ David asked Jodie, slipping an arm round her shoulders.
‘Yeah, it’s strange that’s all. Realising that you’ve hidden such a big chunk of your life away.’ she tells him, watching Urs chat to Else.
‘I’m so ashamed of my life David. I had everything and she had nothing.’ she tells him, watching the exchange between Else and Urs. They had got really close in the last week, and she knew that he would be good for her. He was a deep, sensitive caring soul. He would look after her sister.

After another few minutes Else stood up. ‘I’m going to go and relieve Steve guys. I’m shattered and we’ve got a long journey ahead of us tomorrow.’ She said, she kissed the guys and then looked at Jodie, she kissed her cheek and hugged her, ‘I love you sis, and I’m glad we’re together again.’ She told her. Urs winked at David as he followed her out. Carlos and Seb went not long after, leaving Jodie and David alone. He looked at her, his blue eyes reaching into her soul.
‘Jodie, about what you said to me about being ashamed, don’t be. It wasn’t your fault what happened. It was your parents.’ he told her, holding her hand to his lips as he kissed it.
‘I know but..’
‘No buts. That’s an order.’
‘Oh, you giving me orders now Mr Millar.’ Jodie laughed, watching his face. He had her confused. He seemed really friendly and flirtatious and then he would pull back. He had her totally confused. He stood up, ‘come on love. I think you need a nice relaxing bath and a cuddle.’ he tells her, pulling her up. She looks at him, ‘David.’ he turns to her, ‘What you playing at?’ he frowns, ‘I mean, I don’t understand your game.’

The lift door opened and they stepped in, David pushed her back against the side of the lift, his eyes full of desire, ‘My game eh? Well, the only game I only want to play right now, is with you.’ he told her, moving to within an inch of her face. He kissed her, his tongue flicking over her lips. She put her arms around his neck kissing him back. They stayed like that for a few seconds, then she pulled away, looking at him, ‘Do you know how long I’ve waited for you David Millar. Ever since I first met you. That first time in the bar, I’ve had this thing for you.’ She tells him, her voice quivering, he was having such an effect on her. It had been a week since he had first kissed her, and he had been giving her the come on big time. ‘I need to know David.. I couldn’t cope with you hurting me. You see I..’ She looked at him. The lift had stopped and the doors were standing open. ‘I love you.’ She finished quietly. There was an awkward silence and she walked out, leaving him watching her walk down the corridor…

Urs and Else walked out together. He was behind her, watching her. There was something about her he liked. He hadn’t known Jodie for a long time, only since she’d joined them on the tour. But there was something so different about Else. She seemed to express, without realising that she didn’t trust anyone. She was independent and capable. But she needed loving. There was a part of her that cried out to be held, loved, kissed. But Urs knew the time wasn’t ready. She would need to relax and trust him first. So he was her friend.

Else liked having Urs around. He was fun, and Rachael loved him to bits. This afternoon as they were getting ready to go out she had looked at Else, ‘Why can’t Oors be my daddy?’ She had asked, pulling on her boots. Auds was gob smacked by the question and didn’t realise she had put her boots on the wrong feet. Urs had spotted that, ‘Rachael, you silly. You have your feet on the wrong legs.’ He said to her, with a smile, Rachael laughed, ‘Oh Oors you silly, you can’t put your feet on the wrong legs.’ she told him, looking at her feet, ‘Oh mummy, that’s your fault.’ She said, sitting down and pulling them off, shaking her head,
‘Mummy, you didn’t tell me.’ She said, frowning at Else. Urs bent down, ‘I expect mummy was thinking about something else.’ he told her.
‘Yeah..’ Else swept her up into her arms then, stopping anything else that might of come from her. What do they say, from the mouth of babes.

Urs looked at her now, studying her stance. She was tense, not relaxed, he walked up and rested his head on her shoulder, she giggled, ‘Urs, what are you doing?’
‘I wanted to tell you that I think you’re very special and I love your daughter.’ He said, she turned, ‘Well Mr Buhler, she’s too young for you.’ Else laughed.
The elevator door slid open and they walked inside. Once in Urs took hold of her hands, looking into her eyes, ‘Else, I care for you deeply and I want you to know I’m here for you. I’m your friend and I will help you and do anything I can to make this situation smoother.’ She smiled, leant forward and kissed his cheek, ‘Thank you sweetheart. I really appreciate that.’ He pulled her to him then, holding her tight. He really cared a lot for her, more than he had admitted, and when the time was right he would tell her. Tell her that his heart was hers and he loved her. But not yet, only when it was the right time…


Jodie was sitting on her bed having just switched the tele on when there was a knock at the door. She answered it to see David standing there. He walked in and said “Did you mean that? What you said in the lift? Do you really love me?”
Jodie looked up at him, he was so sexy when he looked like this! His deep blue eyes had gone all puppy like and his hair was falling over his face and his lips were looking so kissable. “Well, that’s an awful lot of questions to ask in one go Mr Millar.” I replied trying not to smile. She shut the door and sat down on the bed and said “The answer is the same for all three questions…Yes. I do love you. I think I’ve loved you since I’ve known you, but never knew if you felt the same way.

*The Next Day*

They spent a lovely afternoon wandering around London. They took a open top bus ride and got of at certain places to have a wander round. They spent some time sitting in Hyde Park while Rachael played at the park. Urs didn’t say anything more about what he’d been thinking about earlier, he knew he was just going to have to wait until she was ready, but it was going to be harder than he thought as his heart melted at the sight of Else chasing Rachael around and catching her sweeping her up in her arms. He got up and went to join them as they played, running around and generally making a fool of himself. It was getting late and Urs was carrying Rachael in his arms as she was sleeping and he didn’t want to wake her and make her walk. Else was walking beside him quietly and couldn’t remember a time when she had felt this at home around anyone. They got back to the hotel and Urs put Rachael to bed while she made them a coffee. They sat and talked for a while, then Urs said “I’d better go, another busy day tomorrow. You know what it’s like now.” He kissed her on the cheek and let himself out.

Jodie didn’t know what to think, she’d told David that she loved him and that she had done since the first time they met and he had just stood there not saying a word, then he’d said he had to go and had just walked out of her room and disappeared. She hadn’t spoken to him since and didn’t know what he thought about it. She decided to go for a walk to get out of the hotel, maybe even go to the arena and do some practising, that always lifts her mood when she’s worried about something.

David meanwhile was sitting alone in a café-bar thinking about everything that had happened over the last few weeks. He thought he’d known all there was to know about Jodie and had been waiting for the moment when she would finally say she loved him. But now he knew that she’d been keeping a big part of her life hidden from him, from all of them and he didn’t know if he could believe anything she said now. How could he trust someone who just put to the back of her mind that she had a twin, not just a sister, but a twin for the past 10 years and never mentioned her to anyone. His phone suddenly rang, picking it up he saw that it was Steve. He answered it saying “Hey… No I’m in a café-bar round the corner from the arena, need to clear my head, lots to think about… sure, if you want, it might do some good to talk about it… okay, see you in about 10mins then.” then hung up.

He appeared 10mins later and after ordering a coffee sat down opposite David. He looked at him and said “So, you want to talk about it?”
He looked down at his empty coffee cup and said “I don’t know, I don’t think it will make much difference, I just need to clear my head of some things, so that I can think properly again.” he looks up at Steve and said “You know what I mean?”
“Not really man, you’re talking in riddles, maybe telling me what’s up and saying it out loud would help” he said.
David sighed then said in a quiet voice “Last night Jodie told me she loved me, we were in the lift in the hotel and just as the doors opened she said it and then walked off to her room. I followed her and asked her if she’d meant it and she said yes. Then I left and went back to my room.”
“So, what’s your problem? You’ve been waiting for her to say that for months. You two have been flirting with each other rotten and you finally got together a few weeks ago, I thought this would make you happy?” replied Steve.

“Yeah” he said. “But that was before all this stuff with Else came out, I mean she forgot that she had a twin sister, she actually forced her to the back of her mind and made new friends and we’ve known her for what, 5 or 6 months now and we’ve never even heard mention of any of her family apart from her dad.”
“How can I trust her? How can I believe anything she says, she’s not been very forthcoming with the truth up til now, so why has she suddenly decided to tell me this? How do I know it’s not just a lie to keep me with her so she can rub it in Else’s face that she has a famous boyfriend. She has been through enough pain in her life without Jodie doing this.” David looked around him and said “What have I done, why is my life always so damn difficult?”

Steve looked at him, not quite sure what to say. Eventually he stood up and said “You know what, I don’t think there’s an answer to that that you will like, so I’m just going to give you some advice.” He looked at David who was still sitting down. “Don’t let a girl get inside your head because you’ll never get her out of it again and you’ll spend hours thinking why this and why that and questioning why your life’s turned out like this or that. Are you coming back to the arena now?” he said.
“No, I’m going to sit here a bit longer, have another coffee, thanks for coming though.” Steve leaves the café-bar as David orders himself another coffee.

Steve walked into the arena and was heading for one of the rooms they were using as an office when he heard music coming from the stage area. He frowned and wondered who else would be here at this time of the day. He always got to arenas early because he liked the peace before everyone started arriving. He walked towards the stage and stopped at the side when he realised it was Jodie. She was playing her violin, not the way she does with the boys, but really fast and is moving about the stage, like she’s trying to escape the world around her. Suddenly she trips and lands in a heap, he goes as if to help her, but stops when she pulls her legs up and curls into a ball. He turns to leave her in peace when he hears her start crying. He turns round again and she has tears running down her face and can hardly breathe from crying so hard. He walks out onto the stage then, goes to her and pulls her into a tight hug holding her until eventually she stops crying.

“What’s wrong hun? why all the tears?” he asked. She pulled away from him only just realising it was Steve who was there. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise they’re was anyone else here.” she said looking at him her eyes red with all the crying. “It’s just hit me, that Else is here, after all those years I spent without her and now this, I think it’s only just hit me that she’s been here with us for the past week and I haven’t paid much attention to her.” “And on top of all that, I told David last night that I loved him and he just walked away from me. I haven’t seen him since. I really don’t think I can cope with all this without him by my side, and I don’t know what I did to push him away, but I don’t want to make the same mistake with him that I did with Else. I know I need to put an awful lot of work into getting me and her back to the way we were, if we could ever be like that again.”

Steve looked at her and said “I just got back from seeing David. He’s in a bad way, he doesn’t think he can trust you Jodie.” She looked at him and said “Why, what have I done to make him think he can’t trust me?”
“You lied to him, to all of us, about Else. She was such a big part of you, an identical twin and you never once mentioned her in all these months we’ve all known each other. He’s wondering what else you haven’t told him, he thought he knew you, but he’s starting to wonder now if he ever knew you at all.” replied Steve. “You have to talk to him, tell him everything, how you feel about him, about Else, everything.” he sighed then and said “he’s sitting in a café bar round the corner, if you hurry you might catch him there.”
She jumped up and wiping her eyes dry, hugged Steve and said “what would we do without you around? thank you so much.” then she ran off the stage.
Steve looked around him and then said to himself “Oh, I think things would just fall to pieces!”


Else smiled as she watched Urs and Rachael playing in the hotel room, he had come to pick them up and take them to the arena, but somehow he had got caught up into playing a game with Rachael. She wondered how she had ever managed to cope without him around, he made Rachael so happy and he made her happy too, which was something she didn’t think could ever happen. But she wasn’t going to admit to anyone that she liked having Urs around, she wasn’t sure of how she felt herself yet, and didn’t want to ruin things by speaking about them.

She was suddenly grabbed and pulled forward onto the bed, being tickled by Rachael and Urs. She couldn’t stop laughing, and once she stopped she realised that Urs was still sitting on top of her, Rachael had got bored and gone to watch some tele. “Mr Buhler” she said in a funny voice. “Why might I ask are you sitting on top of me?” “Well, you know, I thought you looked really comfy and I decided to try and see if you were.” he replied his eyes sparkling. Else stared up into his eyes and was captivated by their beauty, he bent his head down and then all of a sudden pulled back and jumped off her. “We’d better be going.” he said quickly. “We don’t want to be late, I’ll go get the car ready.” and walked out the door. She lay there for a minute thinking about what had nearly happened. Why had he pulled away and ran off so quickly? She got up and got Rachael ready to go and they followed Urs to the car.

Jodie had ran off the stage when Steve had said he’d just come from seeing David and he didn’t think that he could trust her anymore. He had said he was in a café-bar just round the corner. She went to look for it and when she found it she saw him through the window. He didn’t look happy and she suddenly thought it might not be such a good idea to interrupt him right then. So she turned and went the other way. She walked for what seemed like ages then realising the time started heading back towards the arena.

Steve looked up when David walked into the room and said “So, how did things go with Jodie? Did you get things sorted out?” David looked confused. “What do you mean? I haven’t spoken to her since you left me. I stayed in the café for a while then came straight here without talking to anyone.” Steve looked worried then. “I saw her in here when I got back from meeting you, she was on the stage playing her violin, then she fell and burst into tears. She told me how she was really feeling about Else and that she’d told you she loved you and I said that I’d just left you in the café and she ran of to go talk to you.” he said. David took out his phone and dialled her number and when she answered he said “Jodie babe, where are you? Okay, see you here soon then.” then hung up.

He shook his head before saying “She went for a walk, said she had needed the fresh air. She can’t even face me, surely that means I’m right in saying she didn’t mean anything she said last night.” He walked out of the room before Steve had time to answer him.

He walked through to the stage and found the other guys, Else and Rachael were there. Rachael was running about being chased by one of the band and Urs and Else were huddled in a corner trying to talk. He felt just a tiny bit jealous, it had always been him Urs had spent his time with before Else had appeared. Then he shook his head clear, he had enough bad thoughts in there about Jodie without adding some about her as well. He walked over to them to see what they were doing.

“Hey you two.” he said. Urs and Else looked up and Urs said “David, see if you can persuade her to sing this song for me. I heard her singing earlier when she thought no-one was listening and she was amazing, totally blew me away. But she’s refusing to do it.” David grinned and said “You might as well give up now, cos he’ll do nothing but moan at you til you give in and believe me, he can keep it up forever!” Else looked at Urs and he nodded his head to tell her David was right. She sighed and said “Alright then, but only for you lot right. No-one else around ok?” “Anything you want babe” cried Urs pulling her into a hug.

Urs sat down at the piano and started playing the beginning of I Believe in You. Carlos sang the first verse
Lonely
The path you have chosen
A restless road
No turning back
Then Urs sang
One day you
Will find you light again
Don’t you know
Don’t let go
Be strong.
Seb & Urs sang
Follow you heart
Let you love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you

Follow your dreams
Be yourself, an angel of kindness
There’s nothing that you can not do
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you.
Then Else sang the next verse
Lately see how the sun shines through
Let yourself awaken inside
Like rivers flow, let yourself drift on by
Don’t you know, don’t let go, be strong.
Then her and David sang the next bit
Follow your heart
Let you love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe in you

Follow your dreams
Be yourself, an angel of kindness
There’s nothing that you can not do
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you.
Carlos and David sang the next verse
Someday I’ll find you
Someday you’ll find me to
And when I hold you close
I’ll know that is true
Then together they all finished the song
Follow your heart
Let you love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe in you

Follow your dreams
Be yourself, an angel of kindness
There’s nothing that you can not do
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you.

Then they stop and everyone starts clapping. Else turns round and sees Steve standing there with their vocal coach Janey. “Urs, I said just you guys.” cried Else. “Sorry, that was my fault, we were walking past and heard this gorgeous voice and just wondered who it was. You didn’t tell us you could sing like that. You sang that perfectly. It was so beautiful.” said Steve. “I didn’t want anyone to know, I’ve not sung for over ten years now, not since Jodie went. It was something I did for her, she played and I sang. When she was gone, there was no point in me singing anymore.” said Else.

Janey looked at her amazed and said “Most people who have no musical talent want to become singers and here’s a young lady with an amazing voice and she wants to keep it hidden. I’m sorry babe, I’m not going to let that happen. You have to sing that song with the guys. It will give David’s voice a break from hitting those high notes that Celine does. You had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up.”
Urs looked at her and saw that she was looking rather nervous and said “Maybe you could work on the song with her, Janey? Just til she gets the proper feel to it and maybe give her some pointers.”
“Yeah, we can do that, can’t we Janey?” said David excitedly. “Sure, We can work on it a bit now and then again tomorrow. I don’t think we would be ready for tonight’s show.” said Janey.
Else coughed then and said “Have you all forgotten I’m still here? There is no way in hell that I’m getting up there and singing in front of thousands of people. Absolutely no way.” She stood there shaking her head. Steve said “Well, you can think it over hun and let us know later.” David suddenly jumped on Else and picking her up spun her round and kissed her.

Jodie

I had arrived at the arena about 20 minutes ago and wondered where everyone was, so I had walked towards the stage area where I saw that Else, David and Urs were sitting in a corner talking about something. Rachael was being chased round the stage by one of the guys in the band and Seb and Carlos were talking to each other. Steve wasn’t around. I decided to try and creep closer to see if I could hear what they were saying. I moved into the sidelines and got as close as I could without giving myself away.
Then Else and the guys all stood up and I heard the familiar beginning of I Believe in You. Then it shocked me when she started singing. She was really good, in fact she was amazing. Steve and Janey had just appeared. They must off heard the singing and wondered who it was.

I crept backwards a bit more then David started singing and what came next was totally amazing. David and her sang the chorus at the same time and it sounded so much better than it normally did, there was something in her voice which complemented David’s really well. When they had finished Steve and Janey all applauded and cheered her. She turned round and seemed to be upset that they had been there. Steve said it was his fault, they’d been curious about the wonderful voice coming from the stage. Then Janey said that she had to perform it with the guys for the show and that she’d help them perfect it. Else wasn’t sure so they said they’d leave it for now and she could say when she was ready. I was about to make myself known when David all of a sudden jumped at her and picking her up spun her around and kissed her.
My life shattered then, I realised that the funny feeling I’d had for the last couple of days was jealousy and that I was so aware of the fact that everyone had treated me the same way they were treating Else now right up until she had appeared and now even David was after her. That’s what hurt the most. I’d known him for almost half a year and I’d finally had the courage to tell him I loved him and now he’s kissing Else who he’s only known a few weeks. I turned and ran out of the arena, tears running down my face. I couldn’t stay here now. I knew when I wasn’t wanted, I ran all the way to the hotel and starting flinging all my clothes into a bag. I flung my mobile on the bed and I quickly wrote a note and pushing it under David’s door, I walked out of the hotel and out of their life’s.

Jodie was devastated. The people she had trusted & loved had turned on her. Pushed her aside for Else. Once more her life had been ruined. She got to the train station and jumped on a train, no idea of where she was going.
Eventually after 4 hours of travelling she arrived in Manchester. She had suddenly had a brain wave. She would go and see a person that she hadn’t seen since she had left school. Auds, she would sort her out.
But her heart was broken, the one man she had loved, truly loved with every bit of her being, had betrayed her, right under her nose he had fallen for Else. The tears threatened to fall again as she looked at her watch. It was so late, they would have done the show and be celebrating now. Moving onto Scotland tomorrow, before Newcastle, Sheffield and a few other places before hitting here in a month’s time. But she wouldn’t be there, she didn’t want anything to do with that lot again. As far as she was concerned, she had never known them, and as for David, well, she was better off without him.

If she could have seen him she wouldn’t have been thinking that.
No one was to worried initially. They all knew she was edgy at the moment, she was very touchy, so they left her alone, gave her space. Not realising that in her eyes they were ignoring her for her sister. When she didn’t turn up for the show, Steve got worried. He tried to ring her phone, but it just rang and then went to the answering service. David was getting panicky, as was Else, ‘What if something’s happened to her?’ She kept saying, looking anxiously at the guys.
‘She’s probably at the hotel, needing some air.’ David had said, not sure if to be mad at Jodie or worried. He was confused about how he felt, but he still didn’t think he could trust her.
They did the show, and then headed back to the hotel.
By the time they got to the rooms, all of the guys were worried, Jodie had been everyone’s friend. They had seen a change in her over the past week, and it hadn’t been for the good. She had changed from the happy go lucky nutcase, who did outrageous things to make everyone laugh, to being a very quiet, nervous person. She had totally changed.
But no one had really taken any notice. They had been to concerned with Else to notice the way Jodie was feeling, and David had almost ignored her over the past couple of days.

He was thinking about it all as he opened his door. What had made her change so? He was torn between anger at her behaviour and concern at her disappearance. He walked into his room, his head aching from the thoughts spiralling outta control, when he saw the piece of paper folded up and laying on the floor.
He picked it up and read it, then walked from his room into the central lounge area where the guys and everyone had gathered. They were all worried about Jodie, ‘I found her phone thrown on her bed, and all her clothes have gone.’ One of the other girls was saying, Else was with Urs, he was holding her tight, David silently handed the note to Steve, then sat in a chair, his head in his hands. Steve silently read it, all eyes on him, then he looked up, cleared his throat.

‘David,
I’ve gone. I’ve realised that you don’t need me anymore.
I’ve loved you for so long but now I have decided to move on.
I know you don’t love me, but that you’ve found true love with
Else. I hope you will both be happy.
I think it’s best if you all pretend I never existed. I’ve left and I won't be back again. I really enjoyed playing with you, and I loved you all.
But I feel that I’m not meant to be with Else, and you lot obviously want her more than me, that’s why you’ve all been shutting me out recently.
Right, I’m going, haven’t a clue where, but I won't bother you again.

I’ll always love you all.

Jodie’

There was silence as they absorbed what she had written, the only sounds were the sobs from Else as she cried into Urs’ shoulder. He held her, his eyes wet with tears.
‘Just how did this all happen?’ Seb asked, sitting heavily on the floor, his eyes wet and his face concerned.
‘It’s my fault. She told me she loved me yesterday and I couldn’t answer her, she must have seen us today with Else, and taken it the wrong way.’
‘She’s really changed recently though.’ Shelina, one of the other girls in the orchestra said, ‘When was the last time she did something silly.’
They all looked at each other, then Steve spoke up, ‘Right bed everyone now, Urs, take Else and Rachael with you. Keep her safe. I’ve got a few contacts to try. I hate to say this, but I think we all drove her away. No one listened to her, she’s been shouting at us for the past few weeks about how she felt and we ignored her. But first bed, leave it with me. I’ll see what I can find out.’ he said.
Everyone went of on their own, except David, he remained, sitting in the chair, hiding the tears that streamed down his face, ‘What the hell am I going to do without her Steve?’ he asked, looking up at his friend.
‘I feel like my hearts been ripped out and thrown away. How am I meant to carry on. I love her.’ He finally admitted.
‘Well, it’s no good telling me you prat. You should have told her, now I honestly don’t know if we’ll ever find her.’ he said, laying a caring hand on the younger mans shoulder, ‘Go to bed David, try to sleep. I’ll see what I can find out.’ he had an idea that he knew where she was, someone she trusted, but she didn’t know he knew. He dialled Auds’ number when everyone had gone, and waited.
‘Hi.’ A sleepy voice answered.
‘Hi Auds, Steve here.’
‘Hi Steve, what you doing calling me this time of night?’
‘Have you heard from Jodie? She’s done a runner.’
‘yeah, she’s coming here. What the hell happened? she sounded distraught.’ Steve explained then and Auds said she would look after her, keeping him informed, ’Ok, I’ll hear from you soon. Look after her, we all love her and need her. Even if she can’t see it yet.’

He snapped his phone shut and sat heavily on the bed, his head in his hands. How the hell did he clear this mess up? David loved Jodie, he always had, but being the stubborn git he was he refused to admit it until it was too late. He laid back on his bed, hands behind his head, fingers laced together. He needed to get them back together, all of them, the twins, the guys, but how? That was the question playing on his mind.
He shook his head, no one had thought about how Jodie must have been feeling. He had been as guilty as everyone else, all so worried about getting Else involved and pulling her out of her shell, they had forced her into one. He groaned, god, why did he do this job sometimes? So many feelings to hurt, and people to upset. Surely there must be other jobs out there, things less stressful. After all, he was in his mid fifties, he should be having relaxing times, not running around after a group of blokes who acted more like kids than kids. He grinned, he would hate it any other way, this was his life, always had been and hopefully it always will be.

*A week later*

David

Steve had discovered that Jodie had gone to stay with an old friend of hers from School, Auds. She didn’t want any of us going down to see her or phoning her, she wanted to be left alone, it was so hard knowing that I loved her and she loved me and we couldn’t be together. Although Steve and the others said it wasn’t my fault, they’d all been leaving her to herself for a while as well, I still blamed myself. I hadn’t spoken to her since the night she told me she loved me and I’d spent most of my time after that with Urs and Else. I just couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt, no matter what anyone said. I was going to spend the day with Urs, Else and Rachael today. Those two were really getting on well, I’ve never seen Urs like this before, I think he’s really fallen for her and he totally loves Rachael. They’re trying to take my mind of Jodie and I don’t know what they have planned, but I’m actually looking forward to it.


There’s a knock at the door then it bursts open as Rachael and Urs run through it. Else walks through after them. “Uncy Dave ” says Rachael jumping on David. Urs laughs as David falls backwards onto the bed with Rachael on top of him. “Are you ready to go?” asked Urs. “Yeah, just waiting for you guys to appear.” replied David.
“Well, lets go then. We’ve got loads planned for today, haven’t we Rachael?” said rs picking her up and putting her on his shoulders. “Yes Oors.” said Rachael. Then he ran out the door with her while Else and David followed behind. “He’s crazy you know, but Rachael adores him.” said Else. “Anyway, how are you doing, truthfully?” asked Else.

David looked at her and said “I miss her, but it feels like she’s here with you around, because the two of you are identical. I want to go see her, but I know she’ll not let me in and I’ll have to come home again, so I don’t bother going. I pick up the phone and dial the number to phone her, then put it down again before anyone answers. I’m hoping she’ll start to miss us all so much, she’ll want to come back herself.” He looked really sad and she gave him a hug. “It’ll work itself out, you just have to wait until she realises what she wants.” She said.

The rest of the day passed really quickly, they took a taxi ride out into the outskirts of Glasgow which is where they were at the moment. They had a picnic in this little park and played with a football. Else just looked on and thought how amazing it was that Rachael was playing with David and Urs from IL Divo. She couldn’t believe how much her life had changed since she’d met them. The only bad thing about it was losing Jodie again. But at least she knew where she was this time. They decided it was time to go because the guys had a concert that night. They stopped of to buy ice cream from a van on the way and then made their way back into town.

Rachael was walking with David and had the ball in her hand while trying to eat her ice cream and Else and Urs were walking behind them. Urs slipped his hand into Else’s and waited to see what would happen. She looked at him and smiled then clasped her hand around his. They carried on walking until all of a sudden Rachael dropped the ball which bounced of into the road. She ran out onto the road to get it not noticing the car coming towards her. Else started screaming as David ran into the road and catching her threw her back towards the pavement. Then before he could move the car hit him knocking him flying over the bonnet, smashing the windscreen and then landing in a heap on the ground in front of the car which had by now come to a stop. He lay there motionless while Urs ran out to check on him, he was hardly breathing. Else was crying and sat on the pavement cuddling Rachael who was also crying.
She couldn’t move, how could this happen, they had been having such a good day. Urs pulled out his phone and called for an ambulance telling them to hurry because David was barely conscious.

By the time the ambulance appeared Urs had called Steve and he had arrived at the scene and he went to the hospital with David with Urs saying he would follow with Else and Rachael. They got into a taxi and followed the ambulance to the hospital. They walked through the doors and found Steve sitting in a chair looking really pale. “Steve, how is he? Where have they taken him?” asked Urs. He looked up at them and said “They’ve taken him for a scan, to see how badly injured he is.” he looked at Else then who was still holding tight to Rachael and noticed that Rachael had a few scrapes and scratches as well.

He took her off her and asked a passing nurse if she could be seen to, the nurse took her and they went through the back into a room and cleaned her up. As the nurse was doing this Steve said “What happened? How did David get hit by that car?” Else let out a cry then and Urs put his arm round her pulling her in close to him. “He was walking with Rachael ahead of us, we’d just bought ice cream and she was trying to eat hers and carry the ball in her other hand. She dropped the ball and it went onto the road, she went after it and David ran after her, tossed her out of the way and got hit by the car himself. There was nothing we could do to stop it, it happened really quickly. It’s no-ones fault, just a terrible accident.” replied Urs.

Else suddenly pulled away from Urs and said “I have to tell Jodie, I have to phone her, she’ll want to know from us before she hears it from someone else.”

She walks to the payphone on the wall and dials Auds’ number. “Hey Auds, its Else, I really need to talk to Jodie. It’s about David. He’s been in an accident. Ok, I’ll wait. Jodie, its Else, please listen to me, David’s in hospital, he’s been hit by a car and he doesn’t look good, you have to come here, be with him. *tears start running down her face and she starts getting hysterical* He really needs you Jodie, please, we don’t know anymore, he’s with the doctors, but you should be here, please Jodie. He needs you to be here.” she listens for a minute then slams the phone down.

She leans against the wall and slumps to the floor tears running down her face. Urs runs over to her and sitting beside her pulls her in to him and hugs her tightly. “What did she say babe, is she coming?” he asked. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself down and then said “No, she said she was really sorry, but she couldn’t face seeing him like that, She wanted to keep the vision of him she had in her head now and if she came and saw him lying there with tubes and wires all over him then that’s all she would remember when she left again.” she buried her head in his shoulder and then said “How could she be so horrible? I thought she loved him.” Urs stroked her hair and looked up at Steve who was sitting with Rachael. The look that passed between the two of them was worried, concerned, could Else get through this alone, the guilt already eating her. They shook their heads, only time would tell…

The doctor appeared then and they stood up. “How is he doc? Is he going to be alright?” asked Steve. “He’s just been taken into surgery, the scan revealed that he has broken his right leg in two different places, he’s cracked two ribs and I’m worried about his head. He seems to have suffered a blow to it, but until he regains consciousness there’s now way of telling how bad it is.” the doctor replied. Urs looked at him and asked “What’s he going into surgery for?”
“To repair the damage to his leg. He shouldn’t be in long, a couple of hours.” he said then he got called away.

Urs stood up and got Else and Rachael and said “Right, I’m going to take these two back to the hotel. They shouldn’t be here.” Else protested “No, I need to be here to see him when he wakes up, please Urs.” “He’s right hun, a hospital is no place for a child.” Steve said looking at Rachael. I look at her and realise they’re right. She looks really tired and should really be in bed so I say “Okay, but you have got to keep me informed yeah, the minute he gets out of surgery, the minute he wakes up etc..

After being told that he would keep them up to date with anything that happened Urs walked them out of the hospital and they caught a cab back to the hotel. Else put Rachael to bed and then sat down beside Urs who had switched the tele on. The news was on and they weren’t really listening to it until they hear the next headline.

“David Millar of IL Divo was today involved in a serious car accident.” They both looked at the tele and Urs turned up the volume. The newsreader continued. “David was out and about today with band member Urs Buhler and one of their band members Karen and a little girl. The little girl ran into the road after a football she’d dropped and David ran after her throwing her to the side, but then got hit by the oncoming car himself. He was taken to the local hospital where it is not known how bad his injuries are. The group were in town for a string of sold out concerts, but no-one knows now if they will be held without David or if they will be postponed to another date when he is hopefully better.” now on to other news.

Urs swears and then says “I forgot all about the tour. How are we going to carry on without David? Its impossible.” Else is sitting there staring at the tele then she said “They think I was Karen, they don’t even know about me.”

‘Ladies, please pay attention.’ Jodie yells at her students. ‘Sorry Jodie, but have you heard about David from IL Divo?’ She looks at them, she had been trying to forget about him, he’ll be fine.
‘IL Divo have had to cancel the rest of their tour. They’re not sure if he’s going to make it.’ Tess said, wiping her eyes, ‘I had tickets too, and now this. It’s awful.’
She cried, Jodie pulled her into her arms, holding the woman as her friends looked on.
‘I’m sure he’ll be fine, he’s a fighter I’m sure.’ She said, no one here knew that she had played with them, that she knew them personally. That her heart was breaking even more, not knowing what to do. She should be there, but he was with Else, not her.

The lesson finished and she went home, her whole being was hurting, everything ached. What if he died and she hadn’t been there? Hadn’t seen him, told him how she felt.
She opened the door and collapsed in Auds’ arms, ‘I’ve gotta go to him, it’s been 4 days now and I can’t bear it. I need to see him Auds, need to see him so if the worst…’ She couldn’t finish her sentence, the news was on and there he was, laughing, smiling. The look she knew so well, they sat and turned up the volume, ‘Latest reports from Glasgow Royal Infirmary say that David is still in a critical condition. He had surgery last night to relieve the pressure the clot on his brain has been causing, but doctors now are trying to wake him, but so far to no avail.’ They looked at each other, ‘I’ve got to go Auds, I need to see him.’

3 hours later she was sitting on a train, heading to Glasgow, her mind in turmoil, thinking, wondering, was she doing the right thing? But she had to see him.

Else and Urs were back at the hospital, Rachael was with Steve and the guys, she’d wanted to come with them but Else had told her hospitals were no place for little girls and she would be better of with the guys, cos they needed lots of looking after. She’d been quite happy to stay then. They were sitting in David’s room, he was lying there looking like he was just sleeping, but he had wires attached to nearly every part of his body monitoring different pulses, and heart rates etc.. Plus he had a drip attached to his arm giving him fluids.

The door to his room swung open and a nurse walked in saying there was someone here to see David. Urs and Else looked at each other and then walked out of the room to see who it was. They found Jodie sitting on a chair outside the room and stopped. She looked up at them and said “I know I’m probably not wanted here, but I had to come. I couldn’t stay away any longer. How is he doing?” she looked at Else who was looking tired and washed out.

“How is he?” she said. “He’s not any better than when I phoned you four days ago, you weren’t concerned then so what’s changed since? You said you didn’t want to see him, you said that you wanted to keep a good picture of him in your mind, not one of him all ill and broken. I begged you to come and see him, he needed us all around him. But you said no, so don’t think you can come here now as if you just heard the news and expect to be greeted like family or even a friend.” she said then turned to go back into David’s room. Urs put his arm around her and pulled her in tight kissing her on her cheek. “Else, what is with you, I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner, but I was still angry at you for coming into my life and taking away the one man I have ever really truly loved.” shouted Jodie.

Else pulled herself away from Urs and stood face to face with Jodie. She looked her in the eye and trying not to shout she said “What are you talking about, I’m not with David, he’s just a friend, and anyone in their right mind could see that he’s in love with you and that you hurt him way more when you walked out on everyone than he is hurting right now.”
Jodie looks taken aback then said “I saw you all, on the stage, you and him had just sang I Believe in You and then he picked you up and kissed you, my heart shattered at that moment. That’s when I left, you’d replaced me and even taken David away from me.” Suddenly she slaps Else in the face and shouts at her “I wish you had never come looking for me, cause then none of this would ever have happened and we’d both have been a lot happier.” then she turns rounds and runs off down the corridor crying.

Else shouts after her “Go on Jodie, run away again, that’s all you’re good at isn’t it?” She turns and looks at her “How would you know what I do. You don’t know me. You took the one man I loved and now that things have gone bad you’re shagging his best mate, you don’t know how to love Else, you’re a bitter jealous woman.” Else runs at her then slapping and scratching at her, pulling her hair until Urs runs up and pulls her off her. A nurse comes up from behind them and say’s “If you can’t keep the noise down then you will all be thrown out.” Jodie looks up and her nose is bleeding and her face is all scratched. Else was being held back by Urs and she said “If you had waited about for a minute you would have seen me shouting at David to put me down and that I didn’t like him like that and there was no way I would do that to you anyway.” Jodie looked down at her feet and said “I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say, but please let me see David, I have to see him and tell him how I really feel about him. Then I’ll leave you alone and go back to Auds‘.”

Urs said “Jodie, you can’t leave now, maybe you could be the one to help him wake up. Talk to him, tell him you’re here, he might wake up if he knows you’re here. Else and I will go get a drink and leave you to be alone with him, he’s just in that room there.” he points to the door they had just come out of. Then he takes Else by the hand and pulls her in the direction of the canteen ignoring her protests.

She takes a deep breath and pushes open the door to David’s room and let out a cry when she saw him lying there with tubes and wires all over his body.
She goes right inside and sits down on a chair next to the bed. She runs a finger over his hand and then picks it up and puts her hand inside it. She looks at him with silent tears running down her face and then she says “David, can you hear me? Its Jodie, I came to tell you how sorry I am for running off that day. I really thought you didn’t want me around. You never spoke to me since the night I told you I love you and then I saw you kissing my sister and it broke my heart, so I ran away. I realise now that was wrong, I should have stayed and made you realise how much I really loved you.” she stopped then running out of breath.

She let go of his hand and ran it down the side of his face. “Baby, I’m so sorry I hurt you, that was the last thing I wanted to do, Else told me that I hurt you more by running away than you’re hurt right now and she’s right. I took the cowards way out and that’s something I’ve never been. Baby, I wish you would just wake up and tell me to shut up cause I’m making too much noise like you used to. I missed you so much when I left and when Else phoned me to tell me you were in here, I couldn’t face coming and seeing you like this, but I watched the news and tried to keep up to date with how you were coming along.” she stopped and took a deep breath.

She wiped away the tears from her eyes and carried on. “I heard on the news this morning that the doctors couldn’t wake you and I knew I had to come, I had to be here in case the worst happened. David, please listen to me, you’ve got to wake up, you’ve got to come back to us. It’s not just me who needs you, everyone needs you and just think of your fans. They’re all terrified they’re going to lose you and your mum babes. She must be worried sick that she’s going to lose her baby boy. David, I love you so much and I really mean that.” she says then gives him a kiss on the lips gently. She’s just about to walk out the door when one of the machines starts beeping. She starts screaming and the room is suddenly full of nurses and doctors who tell her to get out of the room as they try to find out what’s happening.

She sinks to the floor outside the room and is still there crying when Urs and Else come back. They come running when they see her like that and are about to ask what happened when the door swings open and they all come out pushing David’s bed down the corridor. A nurse stops to tell them that the clot on his brain has burst and he needs to be in theatre straight away if they have any chance of keeping him alive.

Jodie watches as they wheel him away, her man, her one true love.
‘Come on, get up.’ Else says, trying to get her sister to move, but she wont. She just remains sitting there, not listening to them. Eventually they give up trying, not being able to get through to her. Jodie holds her head up, her eyes searching the corridor, hoping , praying for some news. The minutes tick passed, turning to hours. Auds and Urs sit together, their fingers entwined. She ignores them, she doesn’t need them, she’s managed so far without them, she puts her chin on her knees and waits.
Finally a doctor, still in theatre green walks up the corridor, his face serious. He looks from Jodie to Else, and then stops at Urs, ‘Mr Buhler, I’ve just left theatre. They are just finishing up. The operation went well, the haemorrhage wasn’t as bad as we feared. We still wont be able to see how much damage it caused until Mr Millar regains consciousness.’ He said, looking from Urs to the girls. ’you’ll be able to see him shortly, we’re just about finished, and we’ll come and get you when we’ve got him settled in ITU.’ Then he went. Leaving the three of them alone. ‘I’m going to ring Steve, he needs to know.’ He looked from Jodie to Else, ‘Talk about it.’
‘There’s nothing to talk about.’ Jodie said coldly, standing up and leaving the room. Not trusting herself to be alone with the woman who betrayed her. She didn’t believe her. She was playing them against each other, that was the reason, that was what she was doing. She went to the drinks machine, and got a can of coke, then leaning across it she let the tears falls. She sank to the floor, her whole life had fallen around her ears and she had no one to turn to. ‘Jodie’ A voice said, she looked up and saw Urs standing there, ‘What?’ She spat out, he looked at her, this wasn’t the Jodie he had got to know all these months. ‘what’s happened to you?’

She looked at him, he couldn’t look back at her, her eyes held so much pain, so much hurt, ‘People I trusted let me down.’
‘Do you really believe that Jodie, honestly? Do you really think that David would cheat on you, and with your own sister. I thought I knew you a little, but you’re not the girl I thought you were. You need to think about what you’re doing, because I can assure you there is nothing between her and David. In fact, I really like Else, in fact I think I love her, but I’m waiting for her to sort out how she feels.’ he paused, watching Jodie’s face, ‘David was devastated when you left, we really had to pull him together. Do you know how he got knocked over?’ She shook her head, she hadn’t even asked, ‘He ran out after Rachael, pulling her out of the way. He took her place, we watched, unable to do anything, and then you refused to come down. How do you think Else feels? Suddenly she’s found her sister, but now you’ve turned against her.’
‘I didn’t ask her to come searching for me, I was doing ok, I didn’t need her and I still don’t need her, in fact I don’t want her here.’ Jodie screamed at him, standing up.
‘You’re a selfish woman Jodie. And right now, I don’t like you very much.’ He said, shaking his head as he left her alone, going back to Else.
Jodie walked slowly over to a chair, sinking down into the hard plastic, how had everything became so messed up. It was all going so well.
‘Wanna talk?’ A voice said, she looked up to see Steve standing there, a gentle smile on his face. ‘How could I have made such a mess of everything Steve?’ She said sadly, her eyes filling with tears. He sat next to her, ‘I’ve called your dad. He’s coming up, he wants to see you both, and help us with anything we need. He’s so relieved you’re here. He was worried when you went missing, we all were. Now, what’s going on with you both?’ he asked, She looked down at the floor, ‘I feel so guilty. I mean I had the perfect childhood, and what did Else have?’

‘I thought we had sorted all this out.’ He said with a frown.
‘No, its constantly on my mind. All I can think off is how different our lives were, and that they shouldn’t have been.’
‘Yes they were different. But we can’t turn back the clock, god if I could I would turn it back, make David healthy again.’ Else said walking up to her sister. ‘I needed you yes, but things happened that we couldn’t change, but now we can. We have the opportunity to get to know each other again, and Jodie, I want to, please.’ Jodie looked at her sister, tears in her eyes, she didn’t know what to do, she wanted to, but what about David. She looked at her sister, but a nurse appeared and said that they could go to David. So the 4 of them followed. Urs, Else and Steve. Along with Jodie they walked slowly, each lost in their own thoughts.

David was pale, too pale. Jodie stood by the door, not daring to move any nearer him. Else and Urs were holding hands, Else gently touching David’s face. Their was a quiet knock at the door, Jodie opened it and collapsed into a pair of string arms, ‘Daddy, I’m so glad to see you.’ She sobbed, he held her, his eyes finding Urs and then he paled as he saw Else. Jodie felt him tense, knowing he had spotted the twin he left behind many years ago. She stood back, pulling away from him, ‘Dad, this is Else.’ Jodie said, then left the room, it was all too much for her. She sat in a chair, her head back against the wall, her eyes closed.


Dad had travelled up here, to comfort her, only to be greeted by Else. He didn’t know she was here, she hadn’t bothered to ring him, tell him that she had found her. And what about Rachael? What would he say when he realised he was a grandfather. She opened her eyes as footsteps echoed down the long corridor. Seb was walking towards her, his face watching her, a worried expression in his eyes, ‘You look like hell.’ He told her as he sat down next to her, ‘Cheers Seb, always nice to know I look my best.’ she said in reply, managing a slight smile.
‘How’s it going?’ he asked, looking at the door.
‘He’s just come outta surgery. But Dad’s turned up and I hadn’t told him about Else. He’s in there now. God Seb, what a damn mess my life is at the moment.’ she sighed, looking at him, ‘How have I managed to mess it up in such a big way?’
He looked at her, ‘Because you feel guilty about the life you’ve had and you can’t put that behind you to move forward. Until you do, you’ll always be regretting what happened in the past.’ he went silent, thinking, looking at her, ‘The trouble is, you feel partly responsible for what happened. When you’re parents split, you were the oldest, you felt it was your place to look out for Else. You feel guilty for so much; for leaving; for what happened. And then for moving on with your life. You cant be guilty, it wasn’t your fault.’ he told her, watching as her eyes filled with tears. As she looked at him, she realised he had hit the nail on the head, what he had said was exactly right. She needed to stop feeling guilty, but how?
When it had been with her for so long.

They sat in silence for a while, just holding hands, Seb letting her know he was there for her. The door opened and Else, Urs and the twins Dad walked out, ‘We’re going back to the hotel.’ He told her, Jodie stood up, ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.’ She said, he smiled, hugging her, ‘Go in there and sit with him, you love him, he loves you. Be there for him, no more running. Promise.’ She looked down, embarrassed by recent events, then Else held her, holding her tight to her, her arms wrapping round her. ‘I love you Sis. Even if you are pig headed and awkward.’ She told her, kissing her cheek.
‘Go and sit with David, I’m taking dad to meet his granddaughter.’ She said, they grinned, ‘She’s a great kid dad, really cute.’ They hugged again and went, leaving Jodie with Steve and Seb.
‘I’m going too, if you need me, call.’ Steve said, looking suddenly very old and very tired. ‘I’ll stay here, my turn anyways.’ Seb told the older man, shaking hands. Jodie turned and walked quietly into David’s room. She sat in the chair and watched him, knowing Seb was outside if she needed him. David was sleeping soundly, the various drips and things running and purring, but she wasn’t worried, she knew he would pull through, somehow she just knew.
‘David, I love you. I’m sorry I left you, and ran away. I couldn’t bear the thought of not having you next to me.’ She started, but the words froze in her throat, she sat and looked at him, drinking in his face.
Please let him be ok.

‘Jodie, that you.’ A weak voice broke through her slumber. Jodie’s eyes flickered open to see the beautiful blue of David’s looking at her.
‘Hi baby.’ She said, moving across to the bed, stroking his face.
‘You came back.’
‘I couldn’t leave you in this state could I.’
‘I thought I had lost you.’
‘No, I was being a silly woman.’
‘No, you’re a perfect woman.’ He told her, his eyes closing. She wiped the tears away, and pressed the nurse call button, letting them know he had regained consciousness. Suddenly she felt better than she had for a long time and was beginning to get an idea.
Something she needed to take care off.

*3 weeks later*

David was finally allowed home.
Tomorrow they were all heading back to London, but Jodie had one thing left to do. She had spent practically every minute at the hospital over the last weeks, being there for him. And it hadn’t been easy. David was having a problem with his memory. He would forget things he had just been told, the doctors had warned them that this was a possible side effect, but it was hard on everyone and he was getting very frustrated by it. He would go all quiet and stare in space, ignoring anyone who was around him. Jodie had done her best, helping him, and they were closer than ever, although if he was in a bad mood, it was usually her who took the brunt of it.

Jodie stood outside the house, looking at the number on the door, ‘76’ it said, she checked the piece of paper in her hands, it was the place. She was so nervous, she was about to see her mum, the first time in all these years.
She knocked and stood back, waiting, her breath changing, nerves hitting her hard. All the times she had been on stage playing in front of thousands she had been fine, but now, here, she thought she was going to be sick.
The door opened and she found herself looking at the man Else had described. He sent shivers down her spine, ‘Else, I knew you would come home.’ He said, a lecherous grin on his face.
‘I’m not Else and I haven’t come home.’ she spat at him, ‘I’ve come to see Mum, not you, you disgusting creep.’
‘Aw, has that poor little girl been talking to her big bad sister.’ Suddenly he grabbed her hair and pulled her in, slamming the door behind her. She fought like a banshee, but he was strong and the next half hour was the worst in her life.
He attacked her, pinning her to the floor, ‘Now to see if the other sister is as good as the first.’ He said, then he proceeded to rape her. Jodie screamed, fighting, but he was just to heavy.
She fought like a wild cat, scratching his face, enraging him further, he slapped her back, catching her hard on the cheek. Tears fell, she stopped struggling, knowing that she hadn’t any chance of winning against him. He chuckled, ‘See, you are just like your sister and your mother, need it hard and to be put back in your places, getting all high and mighty with me.’ Eventually he finished, then he stood, dragged her up and threw her out, ‘You know where I am if you need a real man again.’ He laughed, then slammed the door, Jodie stood there. How had she let that happen.

Urs and Else were playing with Rachael, she had loved her granddad and couldn’t wait to go visit him again. They had left Scotland a week ago, and hadn’t seen him yet because he was away on business. Urs looked at her, watching as she put away the washing. They had moved in together as soon as they had returned, although he hadn’t pushed her to sleep with him, she had her own room, they were very close. Else was aware of the fact that she wanted him badly, but she felt awkward still. When the time was right it would happen.
‘Oors, stop goggling mummy and play.’ She said, Urs burst out laughing, ‘What’s goggling mean Rachael?’ he asked her.
‘U know, u looking at mummy all silly like, goggling, that’s what Uncy Seb calls it.’
‘Ogling sweetie.’ Else said, laughing at the two off them on the bed, ‘Goggling, that’s what I said.’ Rachael said, standing on the bed, then she grinned at Else before diving onto Urs.
Unfortunately her knee caught him in a very sensitive space, making him shout out, ‘Oh sh|t.’ He moaned, rolling over, Rachael looked at him, ‘Language Oors,’ She told him seriously, jumping from the bed and leaving the room, they heard her go into her room and the TV turn on then they both burst out laughing, ‘She’s something else.’ he said, still groaning, ‘Is it really sore babe.’ Else asked; concerned.
‘It is, would you like to rub it better for me?’ Urs asks, she slaps him, ‘Mr Buhler, what a shocking thing to ask.’ she jokes.
‘Is it Else. Really. I love you and I want you to let me prove it to you,. I want to love you. Show you what a man can do to make a woman feel. I really want you Else, always, by my side. You have no idea how you make me feel. I can’t imagine my life without you two.’ He said, rolling onto his side to look at her, his hand on her face, stroking the soft skin, ‘I want us to be together always babe. Will you marry me?’

They both stopped, looking amazed at each other, where had that come from, ‘You don’t mean that Urs.” she said, looking at the floor. It would be perfect if he did and she would marry him tomorrow, but he can’t have meant it, could he?
Urs thought about what he had just said, realising it was what he wanted more than anything, ‘I love you and I mean it.’ He stood up and then knelt down in front of her, taking her hand in his, ‘I love you Else. Will you do me the honour of agreeing to become my wife?’ He asked, Else looked at him, just then Rachael walked in, ’What are you doing on the floor Oors?’ She asked, sitting next to her mum on the bed, ‘Well, I wanted to know if your mum would marry me.’
‘Like you’ll be my daddy?’ Rachael said, her little face very serious.
‘Yes, I want to marry you both.’ Urs said, looking at Rachael.
‘Don’t be daft Oors. You cant marry me, why don’t you marry mummy.’ Rachael thought then, her little face creased in concentration, ‘Then you could have a baby and I’ll have a brother or sister and we’ll be a proper family.’ There, that was sorted, she sat looking at them, Urs was trying not to laugh, as was Else, ‘Ok then, so how about I marry your mummy and adopt you.’ Urs asked her, ‘yeah that’s good, then I’ll call you daddy.’ Rachael agreed. Urs gulped, he was going to be a proper daddy, he turned to Else, ‘So babe, will you marry me? Your daughters agreed too?’
‘Yes Urs, I will marry you.’ she said, grinning, turning a very pale shade of pink.
Urs leapt up and whooped with joy, grabbing Else and kissing her hard.
‘Oh yuck, that is so gross.’ Rachael said, leaving them to it.

The weeks seemed to pass quickly. The girls lives settled down into a routine. Else and Urs were planning their wedding, they were hoping that it would be a quiet, family and close friends affair. Rachael was beside herself organising her toys, as she had told both Else and Urs that they all needed to be there, sat at their own table, Urs had seriously looked at her, ‘As long as they don’t get drunk and show me and your mum up.’ He said, seriously, Rachael put her hands on her hips and looked back at him, her gaze mirroring his, ‘Oors, my toys are very good, they know how to behave. They would show some of your friends a thing or two.’ Then she went off muttering under her breath, Urs smiled, looking across at Else, ‘Where does she get this from?’ He asked, laughing, ‘She’s like a little old woman the way she talks.’ they both laugh, Else rolling her eyes, ‘Tell me about it, she’s so funny.’
‘I love her and I can’t wait to have her name changed to mine, Rachael Buhler, Else Buhler.’ he grinned, Else blushed as he pulled her to him, kissing her passionately.
‘No, don’t look Ted they’re doing it again. Tonsillitis tennis.’ She said, turning and leaving the room, as Urs and Else burst out laughing, ‘We were playing tonsillitis tennis again.’
‘I know, I think it’s 3 all, so this is set point.’ Urs laughed, his mouth closing over Else’ again.



Things for Jodie were going very differently. She had got back from the visit to her mums, and hidden what had happened. Buried it deep in her heart, moving all her being to looking out for David.
She got him home that evening, settled him down and moved into his spare room. He went from being the David she had fallen in love with, to being a totally obnoxious arse of a bloke. When he had bad days she found it so hard, he would shout at her for the silliest things. Accusing her of moving things that he had put down, when in fact he had forgotten where he put them. She tried to deal with it, remind herself it wasn’t her David, but some other bloke, but every time it happened, it hurt her more. Her self esteem was so low, she was beginning to blame herself for everything that had happened.
She would go to bed at night and dream she was being attacked again, clawing at the sheets, waking to wet sheets from the sweat of her panic stricken body. She cried in private, putting on a brave face to the others in her empty life. But people were noticing the change, noticed how pale she looked, how thin she was. Else had noticed the spark gone from her eyes, and she didn’t walk tall, or proud anymore, she walked with slow steps, as if her life was meaning less.
Else was very concerned for her, but when she tried to talk to Urs, he just said it was a lot of strain on her, looking after David, because they had seen his other side a couple of times. She looked at him, ‘I don’t know what to do for her Urs. She seems so old all of a sudden.’
‘I don’t think anyone can do much for her, the only one who could is David and he’s so lost at the moment he can’t even help himself.’ She agreed, but she still felt that there had to be something she could do for her twin.

Jodie continued on for the next few weeks, her life going from bad to worse. David very rarely had good days now, he always seemed moody and she was at her wits end, she didn’t know what to do for him, or how to get her life back together. She was constantly washing herself, and tensed if anyone as much as laid a finger on her, she hated being touched, feeling physically sick if anyone should hug her. Else watched this with a keen interest, then suddenly she thought she knew what had happened.

Next day they were out shopping, trying to find a dress for the wedding. Jodie was smiling, and laughing, the first time in ages. Else watched her, wondering if her hunch was right.
They finally stopped and had a coffee, ‘Jodie, ‘Else started, ‘Can I ask you something?’
Jodie looked at her twin, wondering what was coming, ‘When you were in Scotland did you go and see Mum?’ she asked, looking at her, watching for the little tell tale signs on her face.
‘No why? What made you ask that.’ she said, picking up her coffee, the cup shaking in her hand. Else knew enough, something had happened, but obviously she wasn’t going to tell what. Else dropped her off, waving and then heading home, still worried about her sister.

Jodie walked in the door, the place was in silence. She shrugged out of her coat, hanging it on the coat rack.
‘Where have you been?’ He asked, standing against the door frame to the lounge.
‘You know David, I went out with Else to start trying to find a wedding dress.’
‘Well, you could have told me.’ He threw across to her, his tone making her groan.
‘I did tell you, loads of times.’ she said, turning sadly to face him. His eyes were cold, he was like a stranger standing there. Obviously in one of his moods.
‘Oh, so when did you tell me then?’ He scowled.
‘Yesterday at breakfast and last night, and again this morning before she picked me up.’
‘I don’t believe you, you went off out. I came in from being with the guys and you weren’t here.’ he accused her, storming upstairs, Jodie watched and wiped away tears, where was the man she loved? Please come back to me. She knew she was sinking deeper into despair, but she didn’t know how to get out of it.

She spent the rest of the day doing the jobs around the house, David had stayed in his room out of her way. She was standing in the living room, looking out the window. But she wasn’t seeing the garden. In her mind she was standing in the hall at her mum’s, her step dad pinning her to the wall as his hands ran down her body, his reeking breath making her skin crawl where it fell.
Her breath was leaving her body in short, sharp breaths. She was frozen to the spot, stuck in the past. Suddenly arms gripped her waist, twisting her around, she saw him standing there, his eyes mad with last, desire. She screamed, her hands slapping, scratching him. He held her tight, ‘Jodie, it’s me, David.’
‘Get off me, leave me alone.’ She screamed, kicking out.

She broke his grip and fell to the floor, sobs wracking her whole body. David was stunned, he stood watching her crawl away from him, he touched his face, blood on his fingers. She was cowering in a corner, trying to hide, trying to get away from him. He crouched down, ‘Jodie, it’s me.’ he said, the old David finally emerging, what the heck had happened to her?
‘Jodie, babe, please. What happened?’ But she couldn’t stop crying, he reached out for her, but she scuttled back, trying to get right in the corner, out of sight.
He sat down heavily, his head in his hands. The minutes felt like hours, the only sound was her heart wrenching sobs and for once in his life David didn’t know what to do.
Eventually she looked up, the past fading, being replaced by the present. ‘David?’ She said in a small voice, he looked at her, nodding, ‘Its me babe, what the hell happened to you?’ he asked, she shook her head, the tears blinding her eyes, then she sobbed again, letting David pull her to him. ‘Ssh, babe, ssh. You’re safe, I wont ever let nothing happen to you, ssshhh.’ Jodie just cried, ’it already has.’ She whispered, David looked at her, the distress of whatever had happened making her seem so small and fragile.

Finally he got her settled on the couch, a cup of tea in her hands. David looked at her, realising that she had been struggling with him and this, no wonder she had been such a stranger recently, but then he hadn’t exactly been himself.
‘Jodie babe, what happened to you?’ He asked her, his eyes holding hers, only she couldn’t look at him, she looked away, anywhere but at him.
‘I went and visited my mum when we were in Scotland.’ She sobbed, fighting to control herself. ‘The day they let you home.’ She started, feeling the tears threaten again. ‘Only mum wasn’t there, but HE was. He attacked me, then he…’ she couldn’t continue, David felt sick, he pulled her to him but she fought him, pulling away, ‘I can’t David, I feel so dirty, I’m unclean, I can’t bear anyone touching me, it makes me wanna throw up.’ Then the tears started, ‘How could he do it to me. Surely doing it to Else all those years was enough, he’s sick, poor Else, how could she bear it.’ she continued crying, making no sense at all.

In the end he reached for the phone, dialling Else’ number. Carlos was there at the moment, so he agreed to stay with Rachael whilst her and Urs came round. David watched her, desperately wanting to pull her into his arms, but she wouldn’t let him. She hugged her knees to her chest and rested her head on them, gently rocking, as if she was trying to comfort herself. Then David realised just how long she had had to deal with this on her own, nearly two months, whilst he had been a selfish pig to her. He groaned, and sat back, wishing he could turn the clock back for all of them. Back to before she had run away, back even further, save all the hurt, but as it was, all he could do was be here for her and hold her. But that was if she would let him, of course.

Else and Urs arrived not long after, looking puzzled, David hadn’t really told them what had happened, just that something had come up. He lead them into the kitchen before taking them into see Jodie.
‘Look guys, Else, this is gonna be tough love. Something did happen to her.’
‘I knew it, she went home didn’t she, went to mums.’
‘Yeah, but your mum wasn’t home. But HE was.’ David said, watching as the realisation dawned in Else’ eyes. She stood and ran out of the room, racing to her sister. Jodie was still on the couch, still rocking, Else cried, ‘Jodie, oh no babe.’ And hugged her to her, crying with her. They held each other tight, ‘He was so horrible, he hurt me, and laughed, saying we all needed to be reminded of our places.’ Jodie cried more, as Else held her, the memories of her own time with him flooding back.

Urs and David stood in the kitchen, ‘God Urs, I’ve been such a pig to her, blaming her for my memory. It’s like I’ve been holding her whilst he kicked her.’ David said, shaking his head. ‘You weren’t to know, you had troubles of your own, I knew she wasn’t good, but this, I can’t believe it.’ Urs said, his tone of voice changing, he was as shocked as the others. They walked into the lounge, seeing Else holding her as the grief flooded through her, she was distraught once again.

‘She’s finally asleep.’ Else said, walking into the room and sitting next to Urs. He put his arm around her and hugged her, kissing her head.
‘How are you babe?’ he asked, looking into her eyes.
‘I can’t believe she’s going through it all now. The things he said to her where the things he used to say to me, I mean, he’s not changed, I think he imagined it was me crawling back to him. But it wasn’t, it was Jodie and it’s really hit her hard David. I don’t know how easy its going to be to get through this love.’ They stared at each other, each lost in their own thoughts.

Else and Urs stayed there a few more hours, Else told the guys how she had felt when their step dad had been doing that to her and how she had felt for years afterwards. She hadn’t wanted anyone touching her, she didn’t even have any female friends she could have talked it through with, she had just let it fester in her mind for over a year until she’d had enough and was willing to take a knife to him to get him to stop. She had got to the stage where she wouldn’t even have to tell people to stay away, they could tell by her body language not to come too close. She was in actual fact not dealing with it at all, she was just living her life for the sake of Rachael. In fact, if Rachael hadn’t been born she probably would have given up a long time ago. Before they left Else turned to David and hugging him said “Just be there for her, let her talk, let her get it all out, because keeping it inside didn’t do me any good, and it won’t do her any good either. Tell her I’ll come round and see her tomorrow, when she wakes up.”

Else

I sit in the car heading for home with tears running down my face, Urs takes my hand and says “She’ll get through this babe, she’s got all of us for support and she’s got you to talk to about what happened.” She smiles sadly at him before saying “I know babe, but it will be a long time before she feels normal again.” she looks down into her lap and says “I still sometimes feel like I’ll never be normal again. I just have to look at Rachael and I see him, she‘s starting to look more and more like him and I can‘t bear it.” Urs stopped the car and pulled her into a hug, letting her cry then said “Babe, don’t even think that Rachael is going to turn out anything like him, he’s an evil horrible guy who has to attack women to get anywhere near one, Rachael is a wonderful little girl who has been brought up by an equally wonderful woman who’s taught her how to behave properly and what manners are.” he lifted her chin up so she was looking at him before saying “She will NOT turn out anything like that ba$tard.” She nodded and said “I know, I didn’t mean what I said, I’m just tired and upset.” she sighs then says “I don’t think I can go through all this again, it’s too painful.”

*The next day*

David is in the kitchen making breakfast when he hears a crash upstairs. He rushes upstairs and finds the bedside lamp on the floor in pieces and Jodie sitting on the bed shaking and with tears running down her face.
He goes to hug her, but she pulls away. He looks sad and standing up again he says “What happened babe? Please talk to me, tell me how you’re feeling, don’t keep it inside, it will just rot away at you.”
She looks up as if he had just walked in the room. “David, help me please, I don’t want to live my life like I’m scared of everything, *stares at lamp on floor* I woke up and saw a shadow near me, I thought it was him so I just lashed out, but it was only the lamp. I don’t want to live like this, lashing out at everything in case it’s going to attack me, I can see how he ruined Else’ life back then, she had no-one to tell, she kept it to herself for over a year. I felt such a relief when I told you and it actually cleared my head and let me think of things more positively and i’m still afraid, but now I’m more angry than anything and I don’t want him to get away with it again.” David looks worried and is about to speak when she say’s “I want to go back there, I want to see him, I need to see him and let him know that I’m not about to let him ruin my life like he did Else‘.”

David shook his head and said “No way, baby please, there’s no need for you to go back there, you don’t have to put yourself through that.” he pleads with her.
“I want you to come with me babe, and Else and Urs. I want to see mum this time and tell her all about him and what he did to me and Else. I know she didn’t believe Else, but she can’t ignore both of us can she?” she looks at David who’s not sure what to do. He looks at her and sees her eyes pleading with him to agree so he says “How about you go for a shower then we have some breakfast, then we can go see Urs and see what he says about this, okay?” She nods her head and goes for a shower while he goes back downstairs hoping that Urs would agree with him about this being a terrible idea.


Else had just popped out to the shop with Rachael when the doorbell rang, Urs groaned as he had been just about to have a long soak in the bath. He opened the door and saw David and Jodie standing there. He let them in and they went into the living room and sat down. Then David said “We need to talk to you man, is Else here?” He shook his head and said “She’s just gone out with Rachael, she shouldn’t be long though.” He looked at Jodie and said “How you doing today?” She looked up at him answering him with “I just feel so angry at him for making me feel the way I do, I’ve had enough of feeling this way and I just want to get my life back to what it was.” Urs looked at David who was looking worried. “Um, okay, What was it you wanted to talk about?”
David shook his head slowly and said “She wants to go back to her mums house and see her mum and tell her all about what HE did and she wants us and Else to go with her.” Urs very quickly said “No way, there’s no way I’m going to let Else anywhere that guy again, even if we are there and if I saw him I would probably end up killing him for what he’s done to both of them.” He glances at David and says “Surely you don’t agree with this, you’ve seen what he’s done to Jodie, how he affected Else, don’t tell me you agree with her?”

David looks down and sighs before saying “No, I don’t agree with her, I think it’s a crazy idea and there’s no way I want her anywhere near him again, but she won’t leave it alone, she says she needs to see him again and get the image of him out of her mind so she won’t be scared anymore. I told her we’d come and see you what you thought, I was hoping you would agree with me.”
Just then the door opens and shuts with a bang and Rachael comes running into the room and seeing David and Jodie shouts “Uncy Dave, Aunty Jodie.” Else comes into the room and sees the look on Urs and David’s faces and says “What’s going on, why are you two looking so weird?” David puts Rachael down again and she runs off upstairs, then he says “We came to talk to you about something, but you don’t have to agree to it, Urs and I both agree it’s not a good idea, but..”

Jodie stops him by saying “ I know you will understand Else, I need to go see him again, I need to go back to the house and see mum and tell her what he’s like and I need you three to come with me. I have to let him know he’s not going to ruin my life, I’m not going to let him.”
Urs looks down at Else who’s gone very pale and he puts his arm round her and say’s “You don’t have to go babe, if you can’t face him you don’t have to go.” She looks up at him and smiles weakly before saying “I agree with Jodie, I let him ruin my life all those years ago because I was young and naïve and I didn’t have the strength or courage to do anything about it. I’m stronger now and with Jodie by my side again I feel like I can take on anything and him getting his comeuppance for not only attacking me, but Jodie as well is something I would take great delight in doing.”

David and Urs were staring at the girls not sure what to say or do, they glanced at each other in disbelief at what they had just heard. They didn’t want anything to do with this, they certainly didn’t want Jodie or Else anywhere near him again. Urs looked up at everyone and you could see the worry etched in his eyes, then he said “How about David and I go see the guy? We could have a word with him about what he’s done and warn him that if we ever catch him near you two again, we’ll go straight to the police with all we know about him. We could take Steve with us as well.” David nodded his head “Yeah, I think that’s a better idea, we’ll sort it out without you girls having to get involved.”
The girls both shook their heads then Jodie said “No” then looked at Else and carried on “We need to do this, we have to get it out of our systems.” Else just nodded, but didn’t look as keen as Jodie.
David looked at the girls and then at Urs and said “Maybe we should listen to them man, all we need to do is go there, see him and get the hell out. They will never be left alone with him and if it looks like there’s going to be trouble we can just leave.” Urs still looked worried, but replied “Ok, but on one condition, we get Steve to find out a bit about him first, you know he’s got contacts everywhere, he should be able to find out if this guy is a real nasty piece or just a guy with a few planks missing.”

*A week later*

The four of them were on their way back to Scotland, Steve had come up with nothing on the guy. They were all really nervous, but didn’t want to admit it to the others. They sat there in silence the whole trip there, not even switching the radio on. As they drove into the town the twins had called home Else shuddered. Urs noticed this and putting his arm around her shoulder said “Are you okay babe? We can always turn round, you know, we don’t need to go any further.” she shook her head “I’m okay, just got a lot of bad memories of this place, never thought I’d be back here again.”

They reach the house and David stops the car and he turns to look at everyone. “Are we ready for this?” he asks. Else looks at the house and says “Well, he’s definitely here, that’s his car in the drive.” She takes a deep breath and looking at Jodie say’s “Lets go then” They all get out of the car and David and Urs catch one of the girls hands each and they walk up to the door and ring the doorbell.

The door opens and Else gasps “Mum” she says. This woman is standing in the doorway, her face is covered in bruises, she has blood coming from a cut on her head and her eyes were red and puffy, presumably from crying.
“Else, is that you?” she says. She nods and say’s “Yes mum, it’s me and I’ve got Jodie with me too. Where is the bast*rd? How long has he been hitting you for? Urs laid a hand on her arm to warn her not to get too mad and say’s “Be careful babe, he might be in there.” The woman jumped as if only noticing there were more people than Else on the doorstep. She said “He’s not here, he’s gone to the pub, he’ll be there for hours, he usually is after he does this. You can come in, but you can’t stay long.” She lets them in and shuts the door behind them. She walks through to the kitchen and they follow. Else tells her who David and Urs are and she tells the guys that this is their mum. She tells them to call her Janet.
Else automatically goes to the cupboard where all the medical stuff was kept and started getting stuff out to clean her mum up. She looked at her and said “You have to get out of here mum, come with us now, you’ll be safe with us.” She starts to clean the cut on her head as her mum sits there. Janet looks up suddenly and takes Else’s hand and say’s “I’m so sorry for not believing you when you told me what he did to you. At the time I never thought he would have been capable of such a thing, he was always so gentle with me, but after you’d ran off he turned on me and I soon realised what you’d said was true.”

Else stopped what she was doing and says “It’s alright mum, I was angry at the time and disappointed, but I got over it and although it was rough for the first few years, especially when Rachael was born, but then I met these guys and they were all so wonderful and the best part was I was reunited with Jodie. We’ve had our rough patches, but I think we’re getting there now” she turns and smiles at her.

Jodie goes and kneels beside her mum and looking her in the eyes says “You really need to come with us mum, please. You can fill a bag of clothes and take what you need and we’ll be out of here before he even gets back.” Janet looks at both the girls and then up at Urs and David who both nod their head and she stands up saying “I’ll just be upstairs then, packing my stuff. You guys wait here.” Then she goes upstairs.
She’s been gone about 10 minutes when the front door is opened and slammed shut. Else and Jodie freeze as they hear James shouting “Where are you b*tch?
David and Urs immediately start looking for a way out of the kitchen without him seeing them. But there is no way out except the way they came in, which leads straight to where he is. James can be heard knocking things about in the living room, then he starts shouting again. “I know you’re in the house somewhere, you should know by now that I know where you hide ***** and I’m hard and want to hear you scream. If you don’t scream, I’m going to beat you, until you beg me to stop.’ He slurred his words, obviously seriously pissed.
Jodie looked at Else and then to the boys, panic creeping into her heart, he was here and there was no way out.

Suddenly the door burst open and he stood there, his eyes narrowing as he looked over the four people in his kitchen, then his face broke into an evil grin as his eyes moved from one girl to the next. ‘Hello my girls. Had to come home did you, the boys not man enough for you. Couldn’t they treat you right. Not like I did eh!!’ He leered at the girls, reaching for Else. Urs stepped in his way, his eyes burning with fire.
‘You sick ba*tard, we came to take their mum to safety and tell you to keep away from the girls.’ Urs told him, his body shielding Else, David had done the same, seeing how the girls were shivering with fear.
‘Oh look, the pup stands up to his better. You have no idea what you’re talking about boy. Stand aside, the girls need to be reminded of their places I think.’ He said, pulling the belt from his trousers and wrapping it around his hands, Jodie whimpered, grabbing Else, holding her close, comforting each other.
‘You’re not getting near the girls, they are with us now, we know to treat them right.’ David spat, drawing himself up to his full height and standing next to Urs. But James was past caring, he surged forward, reaching for either of the girls. His fingers caught Jodie’s arm, she screamed, pulling away. Urs and David pushed him back, launching themselves at him, thumping him to the ground. The twins screamed, tears running down their faces. The three men fought wildly, Urs and David trying to hold James back from the girls.
Sirens sounded in the distance, ‘Leave them alone you bastard.’ Janet screams, entering the room, throwing James off guard for a few seconds. His eyes flash dangerously as he turns to her, his hands pulling open a drawer and rummaging through it, searching for something. He turns holding what he was looking for, a triumphant look on his face, he was holding a gun, waving it around. The girls scream, rushing past him, Urs grabs Janet, David, Jodie and Else. They rush out the front door as police cars pull to a screeching halt, lights whirring. Hands grab them, leading them to safety, then they realise someone is missing. Urs pales, ‘Where’s Else?’ he asks as a scream erupts from the house. He had her, he had Else. Jodie collapsed in David’s arms and two policemen were holding Urs back, stopping him from rushing back inside. He was frantic, that nutcase had Else, god only knew what he was doing to her.

The next few minutes passed too quickly, more police, specialist officers with guns, others that were experts in negotiating. Jodie and Janet huddled together, Urs and David standing with them. They were all worried about Else, what was she going through inside.
‘Mrs Johnson, may I ask you some questions?’ A tall police officer asked her, holding out a hand. Janet shook it and then they went off, talking seriously. David looked at Urs, ‘You alright?’ He asked, his face frowning at the look on Urs’ face.
‘If that ba*tard hurts her David, if he so much as harms one hair on her head, I promise you I’ll kill him.’ He said, his voice low, menacing. Jodie looked, her eyes red and swollen, she was trying to reach Else, but she wasn’t getting through. ‘Please David, they have to get to her.’ She said in a broken voice, tears once more flooding down her face.

Else meanwhile was fighting James. She had grabbed a chair, holding him off like a lion tamer at a circus. ‘You keep away from me you ba*tard.’ She screamed, throwing anything she could get her hands on at him, suddenly she wasn’t afraid of this man, she was pissed at him, annoyed for the way he had ruined her young life. Suddenly she had a new strength, he was nothing. She looked at him, her step dad, she realised then that he was nothing, a nobody that instilled fear in women for his own fun. She reached for a knife and threw it at him, making him duck out the way.
‘You little slut.’ He yelled, reaching for her, she screamed, scratching, fighting like a demon, clawing him. He grabbed her, his hands round her throat, but she still fought him, ‘You are nothing you pig. You don’t scare me anymore.’ She told him, bringing her knee up and getting him in the balls. He let her go and bent double, gasping for air. She ran for it, her hand reaching the door, suddenly there was two gunshots, and Else fell, pain ripping through her stomach. The next thing she knew the police had rushed in, shots rang out through the night, people screaming, Else was aware of darkness claiming her, pulling her into its smothering arms…

Jodie watched, her face pale. The gunshots had rung out across the quiet street. The police rushed forward, guns ready, kicking the door down and entering the place, more gunshots sounded, She watched, crying, fearing for her sister. Suddenly it all went quiet, then a voice, ‘We need a paramedic quick.’ She froze as they rushed in, then she followed, a lump in her throat. She saw her step dad on the floor, his eyes staring heavenward, then she saw Else, laying lifeless in a pool of blood, medics working to save her. Urs was there, his face awash with tears, ‘Oh Else, baby please.’ He sobbed, David held Jodie, his hands pulling her to him. They put Else in an ambulance and Urs jumped in, they put on the blue lights and with a police escort they were gone, Jodie watched, turning to David she collapsed in his arms, he held her, looking at her very pale face, a policeman watches, ‘Are you alright sir?’ he asks, going to David. He lifts a hand, and panics, Jodie’s blood has covered his hand, she’s unconscious in his arms, one of the stray bullets having hit her too. ‘Nooo’ David sobbed, laying her gently on the ground, ‘Jodie, no.’ he cried, gathering her into his arms, rocking her gently as an ambulance arrived and they ran to her, carrying all their equipment and getting to work.

They get her strapped onto a board and lift her into the ambulance and David gets in beside them with tears running down his face. They race of to the hospital, the paramedics worried cos she’d lost a lot of blood and she really should have gone in the last ambulance with Else. They arrive at the hospital and she gets rushed straight to the operating theatre while David goes to find Urs and Janet who are sitting with the policeman. They look up as they see him approaching and when he reaches them Urs says “Where’s Jodie?” David starts crying, and he manages to tell them through his tears about her collapsing after they’d left with Else because she’d been hit by a stray bullet from one of the police guns. She’d been taken into theatre and all he could do now was wait and hope like Urs was having to do.

Janet couldn’t cope with all this, she’d thought it was just one daughter she was in danger of losing, now she’s being told that both of them are fighting for their lives and it was all because of her, if she hadn’t brought James home, if she hadn’t married him then Else would never have left in the first place, and then her and Jodie would never have come back to get her and be lying in hospital now. She stood up and said “I need to be alone, to get some fresh air, I’ll be outside if you hear anything.” then she walked off. David sat down beside Urs and they sat their in silence for what seemed to be hours, then this doctor suddenly appeared and they both stood up. The doctor said “Mr Buhler?” Urs nodded and the doctor carried on speaking “We’ve managed to stop Else’s bleeding and she is alive, but very critical, she may not come round for a while. I’m also very sorry to say that we couldn’t save the baby.” Urs sat down in shock and said “But she wasn’t pregnant.” The doctor looked sad and said “ You didn’t know she was pregnant?” Urs shook his head and tried to stop the tears running down his face. “The Gynaecology consultant came down when we found out she was pregnant and he said she was probably only a couple of months gone, maybe she didn’t know she was pregnant. I’m very sorry. She’s been taken to the Intensive Care Unit. You can see her there.” He went to walk away when David said “Doctor, what about Jodie. Is she going to be okay?” The doctor looked at him sadly before saying “I wasn’t working on her, I don’t know how they’re getting on, I’m sorry.” David sat down again beside Urs and sighed.

Urs was crying, great big tears were running down his face. “A baby, we were going to have a baby, I was going to be a daddy. We were going to give Rachael a sister or brother.” he managed to say between sobs. Then all of a sudden he jerked his head up and said “Rachael, We have to phone Steve and tell him and the other guys what’s happened. They’ll be wondering why we haven’t come back yet.” David looked up at him and said “You go be with Else, I’ll phone Steve and tell him what’s happened, I’ll go find Janet and tell her too.”
Urs hugged him and said “Thanks” then went of to find the ICU and Else.

David took a deep breath before he went to find a phone, this wasn’t something he wanted to do, but there was no way Urs could have done it. He picked up the phone and dialled Steve’s number. The minute he heard his voice saying “Hello” he started crying, all the tears he’d been keeping inside when Urs was there. He eventually calmed down enough to tell him what had happened then he hung up and went looking for Janet.

*Steve*

Seb, Carlos and myself had been left with Rachael while David, Urs and the twins had gone back to Scotland to see their stepdad again. I’m not sure what exactly had been going on, but this seemed to be something the girls had wanted to do and they guys weren’t thrilled, they’d even asked me to see if any of my contacts could find any dirt on the guy. They didn’t, so off they set this morning saying they would hopefully be back by the evening. But the evening had come and was almost gone, we’d put Rachael to bed saying she’d see her mum in the morning and then we’d sat downstairs worrying and talking about where they could be. Then my phone rang and David flashed up on my screen. I felt relief then until I answered it with “Hello” and all I could hear was David crying, big heart wrenching sobs. I keep saying “David, what’s wrong, what’s happened” with Seb and Carlos looking on worried and eventually he calmed down enough to talk to me and what he said left me shocked and stunned. I put the phone down and turning to Seb and Carlos I said “There’s been an awful accident, Else and Jodie have both been shot and are in hospital fighting for their lives.

When they arrived at the house only the mum was there and she had been all bruised and battered, so they cleaned her up and sent her up to get a bag so they could get her out of there, but the step dad turned up and he was blazing drunk and tried to get at the twins. Their mum had called the cops from upstairs and ran down to help distracting him long enough for David and Urs to get everyone out, only he managed to grab Else and keep her inside and the police wouldn’t let Urs back in to get her. Then they heard two gunshots, and when the police went in even more shots were fired and they discovered Else lying in a pool of blood and him dead. They got Else into an ambulance and Urs and the mother went with her, that’s when David discovered Jodie had been shot too, by one of the police bullets by mistake.” He stopped for a minute as he watched the look of horror on the two guys faces.

Seb spoke first. “Are they going to be okay?” he asked. Then before he could answer Carlos said “They have to be okay, Else would never leave Rachael, she wouldn’t put her through so much hurt, she’ll pull through.” Steve shook his head and said “The doctor just came back and told Urs that she is alive, but very critical, she’s in the ICU and she may not come round for a while. But the worst of it is that he then said that they hadn’t been able to save the baby.” David say’s he’s a mess, he’s gone to sit with Else. But there’s been no news of Jodie yet, she’s still in theatre. I told him I’d be there as soon as I can. Will you two be okay here with Rachael?” They nodded and then he left them too it, talking on his phone as he left.

Urs walked up to the desk at the top of the corridor and asked the nurse behind it where Else Johnson was. She looked at him really sadly before saying “She’s down here in a room of her own, she’s not over the worst yet, I’m afraid. She’s slipped into what we call a coma. Her body, physically is alright, but her mind seems to have shut itself off. Sit with her, talk to her, sing to her if you can. Anything that might bring her out of the coma.” She motioned towards a door and said “She’s in there, stay as long as you like.” Urs took a deep breath before he pushed open the door, he gasped as he walked in and saw her lying in the bed, so white that she could have been a ghost, tubes coming out of nearly every part of her body. He sat down beside her and picking up her hand he kissed it and started talking to her. “Else, babe, You have to wake up, you have to come back to me. I love you so much, and you can’t leave Rachael, what’s she going to do without her mummy eh?” He pushed a stray bit of hair out of her face with his other before carrying on.

David meanwhile was still waiting for news of Jodie. The policeman realising that he wasn’t going to get to talk to either girl anytime soon had left to go back to the station, so he was by himself when the doctor came up to him and said “Mr Millar?” He stood up and nodded his head. The doctor looked at him and said “Jodie has been very lucky, we thought for a moment that her Spinal Cord had been severed by the bullet, but it seems to have narrowly missed it. We managed to stem the bleeding and she’s in recovery now. She’s going to be fine, you can come sit with her now if you like, so you’re there when she wakes up.” He nodded his head in thanks then said “I’d better go tell her mum first, I’ll be right back though.”

As he was about to walk outside to see where Janet was, Steve walked in and the sight of him and the relief at the news that the doctor had told him made his knees buckle and he fell to the ground with tears running down his face. Steve ran up to him and sitting down beside him said “Hey David, I’m here now, tell me what’s happened? Is it Jodie, is something serious wrong with her, tell me please.” David looked up and tried to stop crying and tell him what had just happened, but he found he couldn’t stop now that he had started, so he just sat there with him and let him cry all the tears out of his system. Eventually he calmed down and told Steve that she was going to be alright, that it had been a very close thing as the bullet had just missed her spinal cord, but she was going to be alright.

*2 weeks later*

Urs was back at the hospital, he hadn’t left Else’ side once in the last fortnight. Jodie had been let home last week and her and David were frequent visitors, they were also looking after Rachael for Urs. There had been no change in Else at all, she just lay there not moving and he would be there talking to her and singing to her, he had written a song for her while he’d been sitting around the hospital and he was just going to sing it to her for the first time.

Car door slams, it's been a long day at work I'm out on the freeway and I'm wondering if it's all worth The price that I pay, sometimes it doesn't seem fair I pull into the drive and you're standing there And you look at me And give me that come-here-baby smile It's all gonna be alright You take my hand You pull me close and you hold me tight

It's the sweet love that you give to me That makes me believe we can make it through anything 'Cause when it all comes down And I'm feeling like I'll never last I just lean on you 'cause baby You're my better half

They say behind every man is a good woman But I think that's a lie 'Cause when it comes to you I'd rather have you by my side You don't know how much I count you to help me When I've given everything I got and I just feel like giving in And you look at me And give me that come-here-baby smile It's all gonna be alright You take my hand Yeah you pull me close and you me tight

It's the sweet love that you give to me That makes me believe we can make it through anything 'Cause when it all comes down And I'm feeling like I'll never last I just lean on you 'cause baby You're my better half

Well, you take my hand Yeah you pull me close and I understand

It's the sweet love that you give to me That makes me believe that we can make it through anything

Oh baby, it's the sweet love that you give to me That makes me believe we can make it through anything 'Cause when it all comes down And I'm feeling like I'll never last I just lean on you 'cause baby You're my better half

Oh, oh baby you're my better half
Ooh, hey baby you're my better half


He finished singing and turned round when he heard someone say “That was lovely Urs, she’ll love it” Jodie was standing in the room just beside the door “I heard you singing from outside, so I just came in quietly and listened to you. I hope you don’t mind?” she said. He shook his head and said “Of course not, it’s only right the two of you should hear it first. How’s Rachael?”
“She’s with David, he’s going take her to the park, play for a while, feed the ducks, everyday stuff you know. You should go with them, I’ll stay here with Else and if anything changes I’ll let you know straight away.” she replied. He looked at Else then back to her and said “Maybe you’re right, I’m forgetting Rachael needs looking after as well.” He bends down and kisses Else on the cheek then whispers to her that he’ll be back later. Then he walks out the door. Jodie sits down in the chair he’s just left behind and starts talking to Else.

After a while she stops talking and just sits there thinking about how much her life had changed since Else had come back into her life. She had her sister back, a niece she adored, she had the love of David and she had her mum back as well. She didn’t want to lose any of that, but she didn’t know how much longer she could cope with this situation. It was so hard having to be really positive all the time for Rachael’s sake when all she wanted to do was just break down crying. How often she’d thought to herself that this was all her fault. She’d been the one who’d wanted to go back to the house and see their stepfather, Else hadn’t been so sure and the guys were adamant they weren’t going, but she’d persuaded them all and now look at what had happened. She had come out of this alright, just scratched but Else had been shot badly and was still lying in a hospital bed in a coma. If she didn’t pull through this and wake up, she wasn’t going to be able to forgive herself.

She looked up at her and started crying, quiet tears at first, but they got louder and faster. She got up and walked towards the window and looked out letting the tears fall. All of a sudden she heard this cough, she spun round and screamed. Else was looking at her, her eyes open. She ran to the bed and hugged her, then ran to shout for a nurse. A nurse came running into the room to see what was happening, then she called for a doctor who came and examined her. She seemed to be okay, nothing seriously wrong, but they’d known that before. The doctor had said she’d mentally shutdown, so it had just been a case of waiting and hoping.

Else looked up at Jodie and said “Urs, where’s Urs?” “He’s with David and Rachael, he’s never left your side since you’ve been here. He was shattered, I made him go and get some rest and spend some time with Rachael. I’ll just go phone him and let him know you’re awake.” She hugs Else and says “I really thought I’d lost you again.” then she walks out of the room to phone Urs.

Urs had come back from the hospital just before Rachael and David had been leaving the house, he gave her a massive hug and said that he was going jump in the shower and change his clothes then he would catch them up at the park. When he got there we talked while Rachael played with the other kids in the park.
“I don’t know how much longer I can cope with this David, how much pain do we all have to go through? First you and Jodie, then you getting knocked down, then Jodie getting raped and you acting all funny when you came out of hospital. Now this, I knew it was a bad idea to go see that guy, I’m so glad he’s finally out of their lives forever. I just hope he hasn’t taken Else out of mine with him” He looked at David then at Rachael and said “I’ve been forgetting about her too, it’s like everything’s just gone completely out of my mind and everything has been focused on trying to bring Else back. If we lose her, I’m not going to be able to cope with Rachael by myself, I know if I lose her I’m not going to want to live myself, I can’t be without her. And there’s no way I can look after a 3 year old, I can hardly look after myself.”

David stared at his friend in shock, he hadn’t known he’d felt like this, felt so strongly about Else that he didn’t want to live if she didn’t. It made him feel scared and he was about to speak when Urs’ phone started ringing. He answered it and listened for a minute then shouted “YES” He hung up and shouted to Rachael to come over and said to David “That was Jodie, Else has woken up and is asking for me. We have to get there straight away.” Then he smiled and looked the happiest David had seen him in ages. He was relieved, he hadn’t been looking forward to saying what he’d been about to say and was glad he wouldn’t have to say it now. They got back to the house and got in Urs’ car and drove to the hospital. Once there he picked up Rachael and practically ran through the corridors with her until he got to Else’s room. He put her down and then taking a deep breath pushed open the door and they walked in. Rachael quite shyly at first clinging onto Urs, because she wasn’t sure if her mum was going to be the same as before, even though Urs had told her in the car on the way that she was going to be alright.

Else was sitting up in the bed, Jodie had helped her freshen up and brushed her hair for her so she looked okay for Urs coming and when she saw the two of them walking towards her she grinned so hard and put her arms out for Rachael. Urs lifted her onto the bed so she could cuddle her and then Jodie, who had been standing in the corner said “How about we go get something to drink Rachael, leave mummy and Urs to talk? Lets go find Uncle Dave.” Once they’d left, Urs gave Else such a big hug that she had to tell him that she couldn’t breathe!
He pulled away and sat down on the bed beside her then looking into her eyes said “I really thought I’d lost you babe, I’ve never left your side for the last two weeks. The doctors said we could only wait and see if you wanted to come back to us.” Else smiled at him and said “I heard a lot of voices in my head, I suppose that was you and the others talking, but I couldn’t make out most of it, then I heard very clear you singing a song I’d never heard before and it really meant something and at that point I knew I had to come back to you.”

“I hoped that song might work, I wrote it specially for you while I’ve been sitting in here.” Urs smiled. Then his smile faded as a thought hit him. “Hun, did the doctors tell you anything about what happened after you were brought in?” She lowered her head shaking it. “But, Jodie told me. I didn’t know Urs, if I had I would never have gone near that place.” She starts crying then, quiet tears. Urs wraps her in his arms saying “Its alright babe, at least he never took you from me as well. Once you’re out of here we can have a small ceremony to remember what should have been our baby.” He held her close then letting her cry, he’d already cried rivers over the fortnight about this and now he needed to be the strong one for Else.

A month later and Else had been released from the hospital and was back home in London with Urs and Rachael. Her and Jodie were both visiting a counsellor twice a week to talk through everything that had happened, neither had wanted to at first, saying if they wanted to talk to anyone they would talk to David and Urs but the guys had insisted and had got the name of a good one from Simon. Their mum Janet was also in London, she was selling the house in Scotland and had got herself a job and a small flat and spent a lot of time with the girls.

The guys were all in Simon’s office, he had called them in for a meeting and they were waiting for him to arrive. Urs who had been staring out the window turned as he Seb said “How is Else doing?” He shrugged and said “She says she is alright, but I can hear her crying at night when she thinks I’m sleeping and she’s got awfully clingy with Rachael, won’t let her out of her sight and gets in a panic when she can’t see her near her.” he sighed then said “Her and Jodie have taken her out for the day while we’re here.” David put his hand on his shoulder and said “She’ll still be grieving for the baby, that’s why she’ll have got more worried about Rachael. As long as she’s talking to Fiona she’ll be okay. Jodie says she’s really good and she’s really easy to talk to.” Carlos nodded and said “She just needs time, its only been four weeks since she found out, on the same day, that she had been pregnant and had lost it.” Urs smiled and said “Thanks guys.” Just then the door opened and Simon and Steve walked in. They greeted the guys and then sat down. Simon looked round at the four guys and noticed how tired David and Urs looked. He opened a file and said “I think that after everything that’s happened we need to do something that will keep us busy and take our minds off it. So, I’ve rescheduled all the remaining tour dates that we had to cancel after David got hit in Glasgow.” he looked up at them and saw them all glancing at each other. Urs shook his head and said “I’m not leaving Else alone Simon, sorry, its too soon.” Steve nodded and said “We know that, she’ll be coming with us and Rachael. She will be helping out in wardrobe like she did before .” “And Jodie will be back in the orchestra as well.” he said looking at David. He saw them both relax slightly and Carlos smiled and said “Okay, so when do we start?” Simon smiled and said “You took that a lot better than we thought you would, we thought we’d have to talk you into doing it.”

Seb half smiled and said “You are right Simon, we do need to start doing something again, all we seem to do is think things over too much when we’re just sitting about.” “That’s why your first date is in 2 weeks here in London. To do all the missing dates, you’ll be on the road for just over 3 months.” he said. “You’ll do a couple of days rehearsal next week, just to get you back in the feel of the show.” he handed them all a sheet with the dates on and looked at Steve who knew what was about to happen. “No Way.” said David and Urs at the same time. “Simon, no, we’re not going back to Scotland.” said Urs, speaking for him and David who was shaking his head. Simon looked at the pair of them sadly and said “I know how you’re feeling, but Scotland is a big place, Glasgow is nowhere near where everything happened with the girls. And you only did one of the two nights you were meant to do there.” Steve nodded and said “If it makes you feel better we won’t even stay there, we’ll just leave for the next venue right after the show.” David looked at Urs who looked like he was about to cry and said “We’ll talk to the girls and see what they say. But as long as we get there just in time for the show and leave again straight after it I think we’ll cope with that.”

Simon nodded and said “I know its been tough on everyone these last couple of months, but hopefully once we get back into a normal routine and you all get out onto that stage in front of your fans again, things might start to heal a bit better.” David smiled and said “I never thought I would call touring and living out of suitcases a normal routine, but I suppose for us it is what we know as normal.” He sighed as Seb and Carlos stood up to leave and waited til they walked out the door before turning back to Simon and saying “What about Fiona? The girls talk to her regularly twice a week.” Urs nodded and said “That’s right, we can’t just stop them, it’s the only time they ever talk about what happened to anyone.” Simon looked through a book on his desk and said “Leave it with me, i’ll sort something out.” He smiled at them as they stood up to leave and said “Try and get some rest before you start, you both look like you haven’t slept well in ages.” They nodded and said they would then left his office and headed for home.

They walked out the doors onto the street and Urs said “Do you think it would be better if we told them together or separately?” David thought for a minute then said “Probably together because then they would see how the other is feeling about it and they might help each other make a decision.” Urs nodded and said “Okay, they were going back to yours after they’d finished weren’t they? Why don’t we go there and wait for them, we’ll have to tell them today to give them time to get used to it.” David sighed and said “Yeah, I just don’t know how they’ll take it though. The tour they will probably be alright with, it’s the rest they won’t like.” They walked off down the street in silence, wondering how they were going to tell the girls. The house was empty when they got back so David made them a coffee while they waited. An hour later the door opened and they all walked in laughing and smiling at something. They smiled widely when they saw David and Urs sitting there. “Hey baby, how was the meeting?” said Jodie sitting herself on David’s knee and kissing him. Urs looked down at Else who was sitting on the floor laughing at something Rachael was saying.

He glanced at David then said “You two seem really happy, have you had a good day?” Else smiled and got up to sit beside him and said “Yes, we had a lovely day and we did a lot of talking.” Jodie nodded and said “We’ve decided that we need to stop letting what’s happened to us stop us from moving on. So we are going to get our lives going again.” David looked towards Urs who took a deep breath and said “That is great news girls, it will do you both good to make a fresh start. We can help you with that as we have some news as well.” Else looked at him and said “What did Simon want? There is nothing wrong is there?” David sighed and said “That depends on how you feel about going…” he stopped and looked at Urs who was staring at the floor. “Going where?” asked Jodie. Urs lifted his head and said “Scotland. Simon has rescheduled all the tour dates we missed after David got hit in Glasgow and we still had to do one more night in Glasgow.” Jodie and Else had both gone pale and quiet. “Steve promised that we would only have to arrive just in time for the show and could leave again straight after it. We would only have to be there for about 3 hours in total.” said David. “You’ve both got your jobs back as well, so that you can come with us. And he said that he would try and work something out so that you could still speak to Fiona twice a week like you are just now.”

Jodie looked at Else who had gone really pale and said “I think it’s a great idea to finish the tour, it will get you all back into a usual routine, doing what you know your good at and that you love doing. But I’m not going back there, I’m sorry David, I can’t.” “It will only be for a few hours though babe, we won’t be there that long, I promise.” he said wrapping his arms round her. She shook her head and said “I’m sorry.” Urs looked at Else and said “What are you thinking?” “The same as Jodie.” she said. “I spent 6 years of hell in Scotland, then I got out and I met all of you and my life got better. I went back to Scotland twice and David got run over by a car the first time and Jodie and I both got shot the second time. I’m not going to go back and let something else bad happen.” Urs put his arms out to hug her but she stood up and walked away out of the room. He sighed and stood up to go after her but Jodie said “I’ll go, you stay here.” He sat down again and watched Jodie walk out the door. She found her standing at the back door watching Rachael playing outside.

She turned when she heard footsteps and Jodie saw that she had tears running down her face. “Oh Else.” she said and hugged her tight. She pulled away and said “I don’t want to go anymore than you do, but I think the guys need to do this and they need us to be there with them.” Else nodded and said “I know, but how can we go back there? Every time we’ve gone there something has happened to one of us. If we go back I just know that something will happen again and its going to be either Urs or Rachael that get hurt and I can’t cope with anymore pain. They both mean so much to me and I just don’t want to take the chance.” Jodie said “Why do you think it will be one of those two?” “Because you, me and David have already been hurt, they haven’t.” she said. “Jodie looked at her and said “They have been hurt Else, not physically, but when you were lying in the hospital for those 3 weeks it broke my heart to see Urs just disintegrate before my eyes. He went to pieces and if you hadn’t woken up I really think he would have just given up himself. And every day Rachael asked me and David where her mummy was and when she was going to get better and come home again. I don’t know how we all managed to get through that.”

Else sniffed as more tears ran down her face then said “I’m so sorry, maybe your right, maybe the guys are right. We just need to go there once and stay there and leave again without anything happening. Then we will know that its not going to be bad every time we have to go to Scotland.” She looked out at Rachael again then said “Lets go see what the guys think?” and she walked off to the other room with Jodie following behind.