Tears of Laughter and Pain

*Chapter 26*

20 minutes later they were both ready and heading for Martha’s room. They knocked on the door and waited for either her or Matt to answer. Matt opened it and let them in. They sat down on the bed and Matt said "She's in the bathroom, she hardly slept at all last night, just spent the whole time crying. I've never seen her this upset, not even when Sean died." The door opened and Martha appeared and the girls gasped at how pale she looked. She was dressed, but had no make up on and her hair was scraped back off her face into a ponytail. She smiled weakly at them and said "Well, I suppose we have to go face her, maybe she'll have calmed down by now, even a wee bit." The 4 of them walked down the corridor heading for JJ’s room and Matt says "Where did you tell the guys you were going?" "We didn't,“ said Claudia. “They're all still asleep in various parts of my room" she grinned then. "We left them a note saying we would hopefully be back soon." They stopped outside JJ's door and taking a deep breath Martha knocked on it. Nothing happened, there was no sound coming from inside so she knocked again and still nothing happened. She looked at the others who were looking as puzzled as her. Claudia said "You guys stay here and keep trying, she's bound to let you in if you keep banging on the door. I'll be back in a minute." then she heads for the lift. The others stare at each other totally confused but do as she had said.

10 minutes later she came back and they were still knocking on the door trying to get JJ to answer it and let them in. She stopped in front of them and said "You can stop doing that, she's not here. The receptionist says that she checked out last night. She must have just come back, got her stuff and gone straight home." Martha slumped to the floor and put her head in her hands. Emma took out her phone and dialled JJ's number. It went straight to voicemail. She sent her a text instead saying that they were all worried about her and that they all really wanted to talk to her and explain things properly. With their plan out of the window Claudia said "Come on, lets go back to my room, get the guys up and have some breakfast. Hopefully by that time she may have replied and we can go see her at hers and talk there."

Matt and Martha went back to their room first so she could do her hair and put some make up on so that the guys wouldn't suspect anything was going on. They said they would just meet them down in the restaurant. Just as Claudia and Emma let themselves back into their room David walked out of the bathroom wearing only a towel wrapped round his waist and his hair still dripping water from the shower. Claudia squealed as he pulled her into him and kissed her. Emma walked through and found that the other 3 were all dressed and watching tv. Seb smiled as she walked in and said "Where did you disappear to? I woke up and you'd gone and so had Claudia." She sat down beside him and replied "We just went for a walk, clear our heads a little. We're going to go have some breakfast now. We said we'd meet Martha and Matt downstairs." After David had got ready they all made their way downstairs to the restaurant. Going down in the lift Carlos said "How's JJ today, have you heard anything?" Claudia and Emma looked at each other before Emma said "I sent her a txt this morning , but she hasn't replied yet. I tried calling her, but she didn't answer although i knew she probably wouldn't." This seemed to satisfy him and the lift stopped and they got out and found Martha and Matt already in the room sitting at a table.

They went and got themselves what they wanted and then came and sat down beside them. Martha looked much better now and she had even managed to put a smile on her face. Although Claudia and Emma knew better and could see that she was struggling with it, the boys seemed oblivious to the fact that anything was wrong. Just as they were about to leave the table Emma’s phone rang. She answered it listening quietly then put it down without speaking and said "That was JJ, she's sitting on a train heading for home. She couldn't sleep at all last night here and just wanted her own house and bed. She said to tell you all that she's sorry she couldn't say goodbye properly but she'll see us all in 10 days for the performance of her play." she smiled then before carrying on "She said not to forget the champagne and flowers!!" The guys all laughed before saying "So what are your plans for the rest of the day?" Claudia said "Well, i don't know about the other girls, but i'm going home today. I have to catch my train at lunchtime, i'm back at work tomorrow." Emma, Martha and Matt nodded and said the same, that they were all heading home. The guys looked really sad then. Claudia laughed at the look on David’s face, it was like a little kids face who had been told they could go to see Santa's Grotto, but then weren't allowed inside. She kissed him and said "Don't worry babe, you've got me til lunchtime and then there's always the phone, it'll be like we're never apart. Plus i'll see you at JJ's play." The others shook their head at how soppy the two of them were being. Carlos said "I never thought i'd see the day when David would be pining after a woman before she's even gone yet." the others laughed as David hit him. Then he turned to Claudia and said "Seeing as we only have the morning, why don't we go spend it wisely?" then he winked at her and dragged her off up to his room.

Lunchtime came around too early and before everyone knew it they were all standing at the train station looking for various trains with Claudia, Martha and Matt and Emma all heading for different destinations. As the guys arrived back at the hotel it was a sad 4 that went into the bar and ordered a drink. They sat there for the rest of the night just talking about how much their lives had changed since they had met the girls and how much they missed them when they weren't with them. They got txt messages from them all when they reached home just to let them know they were ok and safe. They decided to call it a night and all headed for bed as they also had to go back to work the next day.

*Chapter 27*

*5 days Later*

Carlos looked up at the big building in front of him before he walked inside. He was here to surprise JJ, take her out for lunch if she wasn't really busy with her rehearsals. He'd been in touch with Emma who'd said that they hadn't seen much of her since New Year. She had told them all that she was going to be too busy with rehearsals to see them. So he'd thought that since he was free for the day he would go up and see her rehearse, get some lunch with her and make sure she was feeling 100% better. He walked up the steps and into the reception area. He told the lady who he was and what he was there for and she smiled at him before telling him where he could find the stage. Eventually he found it after walking through what seemed like endless corridors. He opened this massive door and walked into the theatre area. He took a seat right at the back and settled down to watch the rehearsal. After about half an hour they stopped for a break and he stood up and made his way down to the stage. He asked a guy sitting on the stage if he could speak to JJ. The guy shouted "JJ, someone here to see you" then he got up and wandered away. She appeared from the side of the stage and when she saw Carlos she smiled and ran up to him. She sat down on the stage and he said "Hey stranger, I thought i'd come and take you out for lunch, if you have time that is?" She looked at her watch and said "I'll have to go ask if I can get away, but we're pretty much fluent at this now so i don't think it will matter if i disappear for an hour." She got up then to go ask her producer. She came back with her jacket on and jumping of the stage said "So, where are you taking me then?"

They walked out of the building, Carlos waving at the lady that was so nice to him on the way in and walked up to his car and he opened the door for her. She got in and once he'd got in the drivers side asked him again "So, where are you taking me?" He smiled at her and replied "Its a surprise, you'll just have to wait and see." then he pulled out and drove away. They sat in silence for about 10 minutes then he pulled into a driveway and parked. He got out and opened her door for her. They walked into what seemed to be an empty conservatory. He took her arm and led her into the most gorgeous room she'd ever seen. There was a table set up beautifully in the centre of the room and a waiter was standing by the side of it. Carlos took her by the hand and walked her over to the table, pulled out a chair for her. She sat down and he sat opposite her. The waiter started bringing food out from the conservatory that JJ had thought was empty. Once they had all the food in front of them and a bottle of wine they waiter disappeared and they started eating. She noticed him staring at her and said "Why are you looking at me like that?" He smiled and said "I'm just making sure that you're looking 100% better." She looked confused, she didn't know what he was talking about. He saw the look on her face and said "New Year's night. Claudia and Emma told us all that you had taken one of your sickly turns and that Martha and Matt had taken you back to the hotel. They said that you got them every now and again and that you usually just crawled into your bed and didn't come out again until you felt better."

JJ went all quiet then, she hadn't really thought much about what had happened at New Year. She'd gone back to the hotel, got her stuff and got on the first train home crying all the way. Then she'd thrown herself into rehearsals for her performance and had kind of managed to put it to the back of her mind. She shook herself out of her thoughts as she heard Carlos say "Are you sure you're okay?" She smiled at him and said "Yeah, i'm fine, thank you so much for doing this today. I really missed you and felt bad about not saying goodbye, but just wanted to get home and away from everything." she lied hoping that he would think she meant because she hadn't felt well. They spent the rest of the time just eating and chatting then she said "I should really head back, they'll be sending out a search party for me!" They got back in the car and he drove her back to the theatre. She turned to him and gave him a kiss before getting out of the car. She looked in and said "I'll see you on Saturday then?" He nodded and said "Yeah, we're all coming, Seb, David, Urs and all the girls of course. And we won't forget the champagne." he grinned. Then he drove off leaving her looking puzzled again. Why was he bringing champagne she wondered. She shrugged and walked into the building.

*Chapter 28*


*Night of the Performance*

It was getting late as the guys arrived at the theatre, They had been held back because of traffic. The had been going to meet the girls for a drink beforehand, but Seb had sent Emma a mesasge to say they would just meet them there and to keep them seats. The theatre was packed as they entered it and they would have had no chance of finding the girls if David’s phone hadn't of rung and he answered it to Claudia telling him they were right at the front and if they wanted their seats to hurry up because they kept having to beat people off to keep them away from them, he grinned and motioned to the guys to follow him. They found the girls and sat down on the empty seats much to the disgust of the people who were standing about trying to get them. The girls handed the guys a programme and told them to look at the first page. They opened it to find a picture of JJ and her name underneath and the character she was playing. They grinned at the girls and Carlos was about to say something when the lights went down and everyone went quiet. The curtains opened and they settled down to watch the play. Carlos knew from the little rehearsal he'd seen that JJ was one of the first characters out so he was getting really excited about seeing her again as he hadn't seen or heard from her since their lunch date.

To all of their surprise however she never appeared on stage, it was her understudy that appeared. The girls and the guys all looked at each other with puzzled looks on their faces. They sat their until the interval but she still never appeared. Once the curtain came down for the break they started talking. Carlos spotted the guy he'd spoken to the day he met her for lunch and went and asked him where she was. He came back a few minutes later and told everyone what he'd said. "He said that they haven't seen her since the day i took her out for lunch. That was 5 days ago. Eventually they decided that they couldn't wait for her to come back and they had her understudy take over." He shook his head and said "Why would she just disappear like that, it doesn't make sense." The girls all exchanged glances then Claudia said "What was she like when you saw her?" He looked at her and said "She seemed fine, went a bit quiet when i asked if she was 100% again though, didn't seem to know what i was talking about." Emma said then "Excuse me boys, but i have to go to the ladies." She winked at the girls then walked away. Martha and Claudia both stood up then as well and said that they were going to go as well and walked off before the guys could say anything.

They found Emma sitting on a chair in the toilets and immediately they all started to say something. After a few minutes Martha shouted "Stop" Claudia and Emma looked at her in surprise. She said "She's obviously done a runner again, but why and why now? She was so looking forward to doing this performance. Plus Carlos only saw her at the beginning of the week." The three of them sat there for a few minutes discussing ideas about where JJ was, but came up with nothing and went back to the guys who seemed to have been doing the same.


*JJ’s POV*

I looked ahead at the sea in front of me and wondered for the umpteenth time if i could just walk into it and keep walking until i was submerged and just stay there. But then i shook my head of those thoughts and stood up. I'd been here for the last five days and i would spend hours every day just sitting on the sand watching the sea thinking how easy it would be to end all my problems by just walking into the water and not stopping, but i knew I would never actually do it.
I hadn't really thought much about the girls or Carlos after what had happened at New Year. I still couldn't get the feelings i'd felt when i was sat in the toilet cubicle listening to Martha tell the other girls about the guy who'd only used her for sex then disappeared, the guy who was apparently my father, out of my head. I'd thrown myself into rehearsals for the performance, forgetting that the girls and the guys would all be coming to watch it. Doing that seemed to help take my mind of it, but then 5 days ago on Monday Carlos had turned up to surprise me with lunch.

At first i was quite happy to see him, but then he asked if i was 100% better. I didn't know what he meant, i hadn't been sick. He must have realised i was puzzled cos he then explained that Claudia and Emma had told him and the other guys that i had taken sick and that Martha and Matt had taken me back to the hotel. As if i would go anywhere with HER again. I went quiet after that and after he'd dropped me off all the feelings i'd managed to forget came flooding back. I went home that night and went to the first place i thought off.
So, i've had plenty of time the last few days to think everything over and i've come to the conclusion that she never wanted me, in fact she admitted that she didn't want me, she quite happily gave me up for adoption without even looking at me. Then she thinks that she can talk her way out of it. I don't think so, i never want to see her again. I wipe the tears running down my face away furiously, i don't know why i'm still crying over it, i've made my mind up and nothings going to change it. Yes, I will miss seeing Claudia and Emma, they really are awesome girls, but I can't see them if they're still friends with Martha. I'm not sure what i'm going to do now, but i know that i'll be safe here, no-one will find me here.

*Chapter 29*

They had all decided not to wait for the second half of the show, seing that the whole reason for them being there had been to see JJ, they collected their stuff together and left, heading for the nearest bar to talk about where they thought she could be. The girls all said that none of them had talked to her since New Year and she hadn't been around on the forum either, but they knew that was because she had been busy with rehearsals. They didn't want to have to tell them that they knew what was really wrong with her, but could tell that they were just as worried as they were maybe even a bit more, especially Carlos who had repeatedly tried ringing her and leaving her loads of messages to call him or one of the girls. After a couple of hours the bar was closing so they walked outside where David said "My apartment is just round the corner from here, why don't we go back there and carry on talking?" The girls looked at each other and then Claudia said "Sure, why not, we really need to find her." Seb and Urs nodded as well but Carlos shook his head and said "No, i'm sorry guys, i don't think i can talk about it anymore, i just want to be alone at the moment." Seb looked at him and said "Are you sure, you don't want one of us to come with you?" Carlos shook his head again and said "No, i'll be fine, i'll see you tmrw." and he walked off down the road by himself. David took Claudia's hand and said "We're going this way" and set off walking with the others following. They got inside his place and he told everyone to sit down while he got some drinks and food for everyone.

He came through and found Seb had sat down on the small sofa with Emma beside him and he had his arm draped round her, Urs and Martha were on the other small sofa. He put the stuff down on the table and sat down beside Claudia putting his arms round her as she cudled in to the side of him. "Is Carlos going to be okay?" asked Martha. Urs nodded "He's just worried and he prefers to be alone when he's like that. He'll call one of us if he wants to talk." he said kissing her softly on the cheek. She smiled at him and kissed him back. David looked round at the 3 girls and said "I thought you were all inseparable?" "We are ." said Emma glancing at Claudia and Martha quickly. He saw this and said "So why haven't any of you seen or spoken to her since New Year, especially you Emma." Seb looked at her and she looked away, unable to look him in the face. He lifted her face so he could see it and said "Something happened didn't it, either at New Year or after it." she sighed and said "We had a fight. We were just leaving her to calm down a bit." He pulled her into a hug as he saw how sad she looked when she had said that. "I'm sorry, it must have been a pretty big fight if you're still not talking." said Urs. He heard Martha sigh and looked at David and Seb who had watched her face change the minute the fight was mentioned. "Are you okay babe?" he asked. She shook her head slowly and said "No, i haven't been okay since the night it happened. Its all my fault and now she's disappeared." She started crying then and Urs pulled her into his arms and held her tight whilst he stared at the other girls.

"What is going on?" asked David. Claudia looked at Martha who was still crying and took a deep breath before saying "When we all first met, we didn't really know that much about each other, not the big stuff anyway. I mean, we only found out that Martha had a brother a few months ago. Anyway, over christmas, when we were all at the hotel in London JJ happened to let slip to Martha after drinking too much that she was adopted. Martha then spent the week between Xmas and New Year going over everything she had said and realised that all the dates and facts led her to the same answer." She looked at Martha who wiped her eyes dry and said "JJ is the baby i gave up when i was 15. I lied to the girls about how old i was, i'm not 30 this year, i'm 35. I just didn't think they would want to know me if they knew i was so much older than them." They guys just look at each other then at the girls. They looked totally shocked and Urs put his arms round Martha and pulled her tight into him and David said "I don't think any of us were expecting that, she didn't take it well then?" Emma shook her head and said "She wouldn't listen to Martha try and explain, she just kept hitting her and shouting at her. They were both getting pretty hysterical and had tears running down their faces then JJ stormed out. Matt took Martha back to the hotel and JJ had got her stuff and left for home by then." "Carlos is the only one who's seen her since, she's not answering her phone or replying to any texts from any of us." said Claudia. "And now she's disappeared." she added. Seb looked round at David and Urs and said "We have to tell Carlos this, he needs to know." David nodded and said "Not now though, lets do it tomorrow, give us some time to figure out how to do it."

Martha pulled away from Urs and said "I'm so sorry, if you want to walk away and never see me again i'll understand." He looked at her and said "Why do you think i'll not want to see you again?" She stood up and walked away from him then said "I've caused you nothing but hurt and pain since we met, and now you know that i have a 19 year old daughter as well. What kind of man wants to be with a woman who has that much baggage, especially when part of it is dating one of your best friends." He stood up and went to her, turning her round to face him. Her face was wet with tears and he wiped them away with his thumbs, kissed her softly and said "This man wants you and if you have a lot of baggage then that makes it my baggage too." She burst into tears again and he pulled her close to him and held her tight. They sat down again and spent the rest of the night trying to work out how they were going to tell Carlos.

*Chapter 30*

JJ was back on the beach, she had gone to stay in the little cottage where the four girls had met for the first time, somehow she felt safe there. She looked up as a shadow fell over her and smiled when she saw Julie. She was the lady who owned the cottage and she had spent a bit of time talking to her about everything. “She sat down beside her and said “How are you today?” she asked. JJ sighed and said “I don’t know, I really don’t know, I just keep going over it in my head and not making any sense out of it.” Julie shook her head sadly and said “Sometimes you can think things over too much, its always better to talk, get it out in the open.” “No, I can’t take up any more of your time, you’ve been wonderful though.” said JJ. Julie smiled and said “You’re welcome, but I wasn’t thinking of me.” She looked at her and said “This Carlos sounds like he really likes you and you can tell him you’ll only let him know where you are as long as he doesn’t tell the others or the girls.” She stood up and went to walk away then stopped and said “Think about it, calling him I mean, not the other stuff.” she left her by herself again then.

She sat there for a while then pulled out her phone and switched it on. It gave its usual combination of missed call messages and text’s she got every time she switched it on. She was surprised they hadn’t given up yet then realised if it was one of them, she wouldn’t have either. She found Carlos’ number and was about to dial it when she realised that he might be with the others so she sent him a text message instead saying ‘I’m going to call you in a minute, but I do NOT want the others to know or I won’t tell you where I am.’ She got a message back straight away saying ‘I’m on my own and I won’t say anything.’ She took a deep breath and then dialled his number. He picked it up on the first ring and said “What happened? Why did you run away? Where are you? Are you okay?” Just hearing his voice and how worried he sounded made her burst into tears. “JJ, JJ” he said but he got nothing until she had stopped crying and then said “I’m sorry, it was just hearing a familiar voice after so long. Carlos, can you come to me please?” “Of course, just tell me where you are and I’m right there.” She sniffed then said “Promise me you won’t tell the others where I am, not even the guys, please.” “I won’t, I promise, just tell me and I’ll be right with you.” She was quiet for a minute then she told him where she was and then hung up. It would take him a while to get there from London so she went back to the cottage and told Julie that he was coming.

The girls, Seb and Urs had ended up staying at David’s for the night and were now all waking up slowly. David and Claudia had gone up to his bedroom but Seb and Emma were squashed upon the small chair whilst Urs and Martha were on the floor covered with a blanket. Urs woke up before Martha did and managed to untangle himself from her without waking her up and made his way to the kitchen to find the others already up and eating breakfast. “Hey.” said David. “We were just talking about how to tell Carlos.” He sighed and said “Its not going to be easy, it will be hard for Martha too, she feels like this is all her fault.” “Is she still sleeping?” asked Emma. He nodded “She was really restless during the night so I wrapped myself round her pretty tightly so that she would stay still long enough to fall asleep properly.” Just then she walked in and he smiled at her. “I’m sorry babe, did I wake you when I moved?” She laughed and said “yes, but don’t worry, you were that attached it would have been a miracle if you didn’t.” He looked at her and said “We were just saying we need to tell Carlos today.” She took a deep breath and said “I know, can I please have a shower first though?” she looked at David who nodded and told her where it was. She was only gone for a few seconds when she reappeared carrying an envelope that had David’s name on it. “This was sitting on the floor beside the door.” she said handing it to David. He took it and opened it, quickly read what it said then closed his eyes briefly before reading it out loud. “David, I’ve gone to look for JJ, I can’t sit around waiting any longer for her to come back herself. I don’t know where to start, but I can’t just do nothing. I’ll call you if I need anything. Carlos.”

He looked up then and said “He’s never going to find her, she could be anywhere.” Urs sighed and said “You know what he’s like though, he’ll have sat there all last night worrying and just decided to go and went without thinking it through.” “So now we have two people missing.” said Claudia. They were all silent for a while then Seb said “Simon will go mad if he finds out that Carlos isn’t here and we have that meeting with him in a few days.” Urs shook his head and said “Well, there is nothing we can do about it now, we’ll just have to make up a reason for him not being there if he doesn’t come back in time.” Martha finally went for her shower while the others decided what to do now they couldn’t talk to Carlos.

*Chapter 31*

Carlos finally found the cottages JJ had given him the address for, he had driven for most of the night and was really tired now, but he wanted to see her and make sure she was okay. He parked the car and made his way into the office area, he saw a woman sitting at a desk and walked up to her and smiled as she looked up at him. She smiled back and said “Carlos?” He nodded and said “How did you know?” She smiled again and said “JJ described you pretty well and she said she’d asked you to come.” He smiled at the sound of her name and said “How is she?” Julie sighed and said “She’s okay I guess, she told me why she’d come here and I know you don’t know but it was me who persuaded her to ask you to come.” “Thank you, I was really worried about her, didn’t know why she’d run away. Do you know where she is?” She nodded and said “She has spent the whole night worrying about you turning up so I sent her off on an errand for me, she won’t be back for a couple of hours, she didn’t really want to go, but I told her that you’d probably need to sleep after driving all this way anyway.” He nodded and said “I do, thank you.” She handed him his key and said “I’ll let her know where you are when she gets back.” He nodded and said “Thank you” then walked off to find his room.

3 hours later he stirred as he could hear a knocking at his door. He stretched then went to answer it and found JJ standing on the other side of it looking nervously at him. He didn’t say anything, he just pulled her in tight for a hug. After a while he let go and let her inside. They sat down and she said “Thank you Carlos, for coming.” He smiled and said Of course I came, ever since we found out you were missing, we’ve all been really worried, especially the girls.” She looked away when he mentioned the girls and he said “What happened?” She looked at him and he saw pain in her eyes then she closed them and sighed deeply. “JJ, please, I want to help you, but you have to talk to me.” He lifted her face and made her look at him and she nodded slowly then said “Not here though, lets go down to the beach.” He nodded and said “Okay, let me shower first and get dressed and we can go.” She nods and sits down to wait for him to get ready.

Half an hour later and they’re walking together down towards the beach. They got to where JJ normally sat and she stopped and sat down. Carlos sat beside her and said “Whenever you’re ready, I’ll just listen and won’t speak unless you want me to.” he put a hand on top of hers and squeezed it gently. She smiled at him and said “Okay, it was at New Year, when we were all together in the hotel, actually it really started at xmas when I drank too much and told Martha I was adopted.” Carlos raised his eyebrows but didn’t say anything and she carried on “Things were fine right up until we were in the nightclub you guys had taken us too for New Year. I was having a great time as were the other girls but then I went to the toilet and it was when I was in there that I heard the other girls come in. They started asking Martha if she was okay cos she had been looking down all night. I was going to come out and see what was wrong with her when she started talking.

All I could do was listen, I didn’t want to move in case they heard me and I wanted to know what she was going to say.” she stopped and took a deep breath then said “She told Claudia and Emma that she wasn’t going to be 30 like we all thought on her next birthday, she was going to be 35 and that when she was 14 she had slept with a guy she had thought was ‘the one’ and after he had got what he wanted upped and left her. She found out later that she was pregnant and although she had the baby she gave it up for adoption straight away. She said her family told her they would disown her if she kept it so she handed it straight over without even looking at it..” She looked at Carlos who was looking very confused and said “It was a girl who is now 19 years old, almost 20. She thinks it was me, she thinks I’m the baby she gave up.” She started to cry then, reliving the feeling of finding out how she did again and Carlos reached out and put his arms round her holding her gently while she cried. Finally she stopped and said “I don’t know why I’m still crying over it, I don’t really care if I see her ever again.”

Carlos stared at her and said slowly “So you weren’t ill that night? The girls said you were ill and you had gone back to the hotel with Matt and Martha.” She shook her head and said “No, I stormed out and left Martha in a heap on the floor in tears. I went straight back to the hotel, got my stuff and went straight home. I haven’t spoken to any of the girls since and it was only when I saw you the day you turned up at the theatre that it brought it all back and I ran away again, to here and I’ve been here ever since.” She sniffed and wiped the tears away as she looked at him and said “That’s it, that’s why I ran away and why I never want to see her ever again.” Carlos shook his head and said “She’s a mess JJ, she probably wouldn’t want you to know that, but she is, all the girls are. I don’t know what they’ve told the other guys cos I didn’t go with them after we left the theatre. But they were all worried when you weren’t there, especially Martha.” he paused for a minute to think and then said “You said she thinks you’re her daughter?” JJ flinched at the word daughter but nodded and he said “Does she know for certain? I mean there is a lot of girls out there who are 19 and were adopted. It doesn’t mean that you are the one she gave up, just because she thinks the dates fit.”

She looked at him and said “I don’t know, I never gave her a chance to say anything or try and explain, I just hit out at her and called her names and stormed off. They’ve all been trying to call me since then though, every time I switch the phone on it has loads of messages and text’s from them all, not just her.” He held her close and kissed her softly on the top of her head and said “I don’t think you’re going to like this idea, but you need to go back and talk to her and find out for certain if she is your….” She stopped him and said “Don’t call her that please, I have a mum already, I know she is not my real mum but she’s the only one I’ve ever known as mum.” “I’m sorry, but you do need to find out because you could be doing all this for nothing. It could all be just a mistake, a mix up of dates and you could be throwing away your friendships with them if you stay away and don’t find out.” She shook her head and said “I can’t, what if she’s right? I don’t want her to be my mum, I always wanted my mum to find me because she loved me and missed me but had only given me up because she was so poor she couldn’t keep me. She didn’t do that, she gave me up without looking at me because her boyfriend got her pregnant and her family said they would kick her out. If she had really wanted me then she would have fought against her family.” He shook his head and said “I’m sure there was more to it than that, that’s just what you heard. You won’t have to go through it alone either, I shall stay with you the whole way through it. Please JJ, even if its just for you to find out the truth, you have to go back.” She leaned against him heavily, not even having the energy to disagree with him and said softly “I’ll think about it.” then she closed her eyes and he let her fall asleep lying in his arms.

*Chapter 32*

Another couple of days passed and Carlos still hadn’t managed to get JJ to go back with him. They were having breakfast and Carlos said “It really is lovely here, why did you come here?” She sighed and said “This was the first place the four of us met. It was the first place I thought of to come, because we had such a good time here.” He smiled at her and said “Maybe that should tell you that you’re not ready to give up on these girls yet, si?” She looked up at him and nodded slowly and he said “At last, can I take you back now please? They will be going mad not knowing where you are and the guys will be really mad at me.” She looked at him and said “Why, you aren’t working at the moment are you?” he shook his head and said “No, but we do have a meeting with Simon in a couple of hours.” he laughed at the look on her face and said “Don’t worry, the guys will cover for me, even if they don’t know where I am and haven’t heard from me since I disappeared 4 days ago.” She stood up and said “That’s it, I’m not having you get into trouble because of me, we have to go back. You phone the guys and tell them you’re coming back and I’ll go pack.” then she walked away without waiting for an answer. He smiled to himself as he put his phone away. He wasn’t going to tell the guys he was coming back, he was going to leave it as a surprise though he knew he would be in trouble. He had suddenly realised that was how he was going to get her back and his plan had worked, she was too worried about him getting into trouble that she never thought of what she was going back to. He wandered off to get his stuff ready and he met her 30 minutes later and they started the long journey back to London.

Back in London the other guys weren’t happy, it had been 4 days now since Carlos had left and they still hadn’t heard from him which meant they had to come up with a reason that Simon would believe as to why he wasn’t at the meeting. David sighed and said “Why can’t we just tell him he’s sick?” Urs shook his head and said “No, he’s going to see through that straight away, out of all of us Carlos is the one that is never sick, it has to be something really good.” Seb sighed and said “Why can’t we just tell him the truth?” Urs and David stared at him like he was crazy and Urs said “Okay, if you want to tell him that Carlos disappeared 4 days ago to go look for a girl that’s almost half his age and we haven’t seen or heard from him since, you go right ahead.” Seb frowned and said “Okay, you don’t need to be all moody with me, I’m just trying to help.” and he got up and walked out of the room. Urs sighed and said “Don’t say anything David.” David looked at him funny and said “I never said anything.” “Good, lets keep it that way. We need sensible suggestions right now”

David looked at him and opened his mouth to speak then closed it again and stood up saying “Fine, you think you’re so good at this, you come up with something by yourself.” and he stormed off slamming the door shut behind him. Urs got up and went to the window and stared out of it, they were at his place, the girls having headed for their homes the day before, unable to stay in London any longer due to work commitments. He wasn’t willing to admit it to the other guys but he was worried about Carlos, he was prone to doing things like shutting himself off when he was upset. But this, running off totally and not phoning any of them, it wasn’t like him and now he was skipping meetings with Simon Cowell. He just hoped that when he did come back he would have JJ with him or it would all have been for nothing. He turned away from the window then and thought about Martha, she really wasn’t coping with this at all, she was trying to and she did seem to have got better after talking about it to them all, but he still had been unhappy about her leaving to go home. He knew Matt would look after her but he still had an uneasy feeling about it all.

Seb and David were sitting outside, David had found Seb smoking and had given him a massive telling off and made him put it out. Seb looked at him and said “I know he’s worried about Carlos, we all are, but he doesn’t have to be mean to us because we’re here and he isn’t.” David nodded and said “I agree, but why Seb, I’ve never seen you smoking before and we’ve spent the last 3 years practically in each others pockets.” Seb shrugged “I used to smoke back when I lived in Paris, I gave up years ago, before I met you all, but I’ve always carried a packet just in case I really needed one and I needed one just now.” David shook his head and said “Don’t take what he said personally, he was just rude to me as well, very rude in fact, but I know he doesn’t mean it really. You know how nervous Simon always makes him and having to go in there and lie for Carlos is making him even worse.” Seb took a deep sigh and said “I know, it just hurt that’s all. Lets go back in and see what we can come up with and Carlos better be very grateful for us covering up for him.” David grinned and said “I’m sure he will and he’ll be back, I think he must of found her, because he knew about the meeting and if he hadn’t he would have come back for it.” Seb nodded silently and they made their way back inside to find Urs.

*Chapter 33*

JJ and Carlos arrived back in London late afternoon and he took them straight to his place. Once inside he showed her where everything was and then sent a very quick text to Seb saying he was back. Then he started to make them both something to eat, knowing that he would be getting visitors the minute his text was read.

An hour later and David, Seb and Urs were just leaving the meeting. Simon hadn’t been pleased at all that Carlos wasn’t there and even less impressed when Seb said something in French that he didn’t understand and Urs seemed to almost collapse and shouted back at him in French. It was only when David stood in between them that they shut up and let David tell Simon where he was. They weren’t entirely sure he believed them but he let it go. They were just about to head off their separate ways when Seb’s phone beeped as he turned it back on. He opened it and read what it said then just said “He’s back.” Urs looked at him and said “What? Where was he?” Seb shook his head and said “Don’t know, all he says is I’m back.” “Okay, lets go.” said David getting into his car. The others got in as well and they headed for Carlos’ place.

Carlos and JJ were just finishing the cleaning up when his doorbell rang. He looked at the time and said “Must have been a long meeting, I sent the message over an hour ago.” JJ looked really nervous and he gave her hand a squeeze and said “Don’t worry.” then went to answer the door. David, Seb and Urs all stared at him then walked past him into the house without saying a word. He shut the door and followed them. Once he entered the room Urs said “What the hell were you thinking, disappearing like that? Wasn’t it enough that we had one person missing without you running away as well?” Seb looked at him shaking his head slowly and said “You have no idea what we went through not knowing where you were and you knew we had a meeting today. We had to lie to Simon for you.” “Some of us did anyway, did you really have to say what you did, there was no need for it.” snapped Urs

“Don’t start again, you two fighting isn’t helping and I don’t think Simon was happy either.” said David forcing them both to sit down. “Is she here?” said David. He looked at Carlos and said “You knew about the meeting, if you hadn’t found her you’d have come back.” He nodded “I went straight to her, she had phoned me to ask me to go and meet her but she made me promise I wouldn’t tell any of you or the girls or she wouldn’t tell me where she was. I only got her to agree to come back with me this morning at breakfast.” He looked at the three men sitting round him and said “I really am sorry, but I couldn’t risk the chance of her running off again. What did you tell Simon?” Urs almost growled as he said “We were going to go in and tell him that your mum had been taken into hospital and you’d gone to be with her but he decided to tell Simon the truth, in French.” David stared at Seb and said “Is that what you said, why Seb?” Seb shrugged and said “I didn’t feel right lying so I told the truth, but he doesn’t know French, he hasn’t a clue what I said.” Urs shook his head and then Seb said “Did she tell you why she ran off?” “Yes, I did.” They all looked at the door and saw JJ standing there. “I am sure you three know as well, or at least know the girls version.” She sat down beside Carlos and said “I’m sorry I caused you all so much trouble, I wasn’t thinking straight when I first ran off.” Carlos put his arm round her and she said “But I talked to Carlos a lot about it and he’s said that he will be with me all the way when I talk to Martha.” He looked at her and said “So you are going to talk to her? When did you decide that?” She smiled and said “When I heard you four arguing over something that happened because of me. I need to get this sorted out and stop dragging you all down with me.”


He hugged her gently and said “I’m so happy to hear that, when are you going to do it?” She took a breath and said “I thought I would go tomorrow, I can’t put it off for ever. You aren’t needed tomorrow are you?” He shook his head and said “No, we’re free for the next few days, but I think the meeting was probably to tell us what we are doing next.” he looked at the guys and they nodded. Urs said “I want to come too, I want to be with Martha when you talk to her, I don’t want her to try and do this on her own.” JJ nodded and they made plans to leave first thing in the morning then Urs, Seb and David left them alone.

*Chapter 34*

The next day Carlos and JJ made their way to Urs’ place to pick him up and then they were off to Kent to see Martha. Urs had phoned Matt to warn him that they were coming but had told him not to tell Martha. After they picked up Urs they sat in silence for a lot of the way there, JJ was going over what she wanted to say to Martha. She had spent over an hour on the phone the night before with both Claudia and Emma and it had made her realise just how much she missed them, all of them. She started to get more nervous as they arrived in Kent and found their way to Martha’s. They had decided that Urs was going to go in first and let him tell her that the others were there too then he would come out and get them. They found her house and Urs got out and went and rang the doorbell. Matt answered it and let him in then shouted “Martha, someone to see you.” he took him through into the living room and then left the room smiling at Martha as she walked down the stairs. She walked into the room and gasped. “Urs, what are you doing here?” he went over and gave her a hug and a kiss then said “I was worried about you and I wanted to make sure you were okay.” She smiled and said “I’m okay, I mean, I still wish it had never happened and I still feel that its my fault JJ ran away, but Matt is keeping me going.”

Urs smiled and pulled her in to his chest and laid his chin on her head and said “It wasn’t your fault babe, please stop thinking that.” He sighed then and said “I have something to tell you.” She looked up at him and said “What is it?” He bit his bottom lip nervously and she said “Urs, tell me, what’s wrong?” He shook his head and said “Nothing is wrong, its just that Carlos came back yesterday, not in time for our meeting with Simon, but he came back.” He watched her as she thought about what he had said then she said “Did he, you know, did he come back by himself?” He shook his head slowly and said “He found her Martha, he found JJ and he managed to get her to come back with him.” She took a deep breath and said “How is she? Did she say anything to you?” He shook his head again and said “”Not to me, but she did spend a lot of time talking to Carlos.” He paused for a minute then said “You can ask her yourself how she is.” She looked at him strangely and said “What? How?” He smiled and said “She is sitting outside in the car with Carlos, when you’re ready to talk to her I’ll go and get them.” He looked at her face and said “We just wanted to warn you she was here first.” She hugged him and said “You are so sweet, but I’m ready to talk to her, I’ve been ready for ages.” He smiled and kissed her then stood up and went to get them.

She sat there feeling slightly nervous, the last time she had seen JJ was when it had all happened and she had been screaming and hitting her. She looked up as the door opened and Urs walked back in followed by JJ and Carlos. She stood up and looked nervously at JJ who was standing close in to the side of Carlos. He put his hand in hers and squeezed it gently and she looked at him and smiled at him. They all sat down, Urs and Martha on one couch and Carlos and JJ on the other. Martha looked at JJ and said “I’m so sorry for everything, the last thing in the world I wanted to do was hurt you or any of the other girls. But you ran out of there so quickly and I didn’t have a chance to explain anything.” JJ took a breath and said “It wasn’t the fact that you may or may not be my mum, it was the way you said it, the way I found out and the way you told Claudia and Emma you had never wanted me and gave me up so quickly without even a fight.” Martha lowered her head and said “I know, I really didn’t know you were in there.” “What, so if you had known I was in there you wouldn’t have said all that right? You would have just waited for me to leave and then say it.” JJ said her voice getting louder as she spoke.

Martha shook her head and said “ No, I didn’t mean it that way.” “So what way did you mean it? If there was any reason you thought I was your daughter then you should have come to me first, not gone to two other people.” she had tears running down her face now. “I didn’t know what to do, after the night you told me you were adopted I had all these thoughts running through my head and they knew something was wrong that night and they dragged me into the toilets to talk to them. We didn’t know you were already in there.” said Martha again. “So you’ve said.” she said her voice getting loud again. “So you just told them everything you thought about me then didn’t you. I had thought we were friends Martha, I looked up to you as you were the older and more sensible one of us, the one who could have a good time but still knew when enough was enough and when to stop before we went to far. But you just didn’t care about me at all did you, right from the moment I was born you didn’t care.” She wiped away the tears and stood up saying “This was a mistake, I’m sorry Carlos, I can’t talk to her, it hurts too much.” then she walked out of the room. Carlos stood up and said “I’ll get her back, don’t move.” and he ran off after her.

Urs put his arms round Martha and pulled her in close to him and stroking her hair said “He’ll get her back, he managed it before, he’ll do it again.” He heard a muffled sniff and he lifted her head and saw tears running down her face. “She really hates me doesn’t she, I made her hate me.” she said with a shaky voice. Urs wiped her tears away with his fingers and said “She doesn’t hate you, she’s just confused and if you can both sit down without one of you getting angry and running off you will soon be able to sort this out.” She looked at him with such a sad look on her face that he said “I promise you, this will all work itself out.” then he hugged her again. They had just pulled apart when Carlos walked in the room again holding JJ by the hand who was following behind him, they sat down again and Carlos pulled her close and held her tight. She looked over to Martha and said “I’m sorry, I won’t do that again, I just can’t think of anything else other than the fact you gave me up so easily.” Martha looked at Urs and he smiled and gave her arm a squeeze and she nodded and said “When you heard me in the toilets I said to the girls that I ‘thought’ you were the baby I had given up, I didn’t say you were. It was just when you told me everything and all the dates fitted in and you were the right age and sex of the baby I gave up it just seemed to be obvious that you could be. But I don’t know if you are and the only way we will find out is if we take a test to see if you are.”

She looked nervously at JJ who was leaning on Carlos and had gone really pale. “Please JJ, if the tests come back positive then we will have to talk a lot more about this, and if they come back negative we will still have to talk about it, but at least we will know the truth and will be able to figure out what to do next.” JJ nodded slowly and said “You’re right, we need to know, I need to know. But even if you’re not my mum, I don’t know if I will be able to ever forget what you said. There will still be a girl out there somewhere hoping and praying that her real mum had a good reason for giving her up and you don’t. Being adopted means I know what that’s like and I know how she’ll be feeling and I don’t know her, but I don’t ever want her to feel how I’ve been feeling for the last few weeks.” Martha lowered her head and Urs said “But you are willing to take the test?” JJ nodded and he said “Okay then, all we need to do is make an appointment and then wait for the results.” JJ stood up then and said “Okay, just let me know when and I’ll be there, until then I want to be away from here.” Carlos looked at Urs and then said “I think we’ll probably get an appointment for tomorrow, there’s no point in going back to London and then having to come back, why don’t we book into a hotel for tonight and go home afterwards?” She nodded and said “I suppose so.” and said “goodbye” to Urs and then walked off again. Carlos sat down beside Martha and said “Don’t worry about her, I’ll talk to her tonight and we’ll see you tomorrow, just let us know where and when.” Urs nodded and said “Thanks Carlos.” then he followed JJ out of the door.

Martha took a deep breath and said “I’d better phone the doctors and get an appointment.” She turned to Urs then and said “Thank you for being here, I couldn’t have done that without you. You will stay here tonight won’t you? You’re not going to stay in a hotel by yourself.” He smiled and said “You’re welcome and if you don’t mind me staying here I would love to.”

*Chapter 35*

*A week Later*

They had gone to the doctors the day after they had met at Martha’s house and had been told they wouldn’t get the results for a week. Martha and Urs were sitting in the doctors waiting room and Carlos and JJ had just come in and sat down when they were called through. Martha looked at Urs worriedly and he smiled and whispered that it would be alright to her. She nodded and walked into the doctors room and sat down as did JJ. The guys just stood behind them and Urs held onto Martha’s hand. The doctor looked up at them and smiled then said “Okay, I have the results here.” She opened the folder in front of her and took a piece of paper out and looked at it then put it down on the desk and said “Before I tell you what they are, can I ask you a few questions?” Martha nodded and the doctor said “How did this all happen, I mean what made you think that you could be related?” JJ felt Carlos’ hand on her shoulder and she said “The two of us were friends and I was adopted and happened to tell her one night when I had been drinking and she realised that all the dates and information I had told her added up to when she had given up her baby.”

The doctor nodded and said “Okay, and have you decided what you’re going to do if these results do make you related?” She saw JJ flinch a little at that and looked at Martha and said “What would you do?” She smiled and said “Well, I would sit down with JJ and tell her exactly why I gave her up all those years ago and how I’ve regretted it every single minute since.” The doctor nodded and said “Right, well, the test results came back as negative.” She looked at the two girls who were both staring at her shocked and JJ said “You mean, she’s not my mum?” The doctor nodded and said “Yes, that’s what I mean.” Martha didn’t know what to say, she stared at the doctor for a few seconds then looked at JJ then back to the doctor and then at Urs who saw the look on her face and said “Thank you doctor.” then he took her hand and led her out of the room followed by JJ who walked straight past them towards the exit. “JJ, wait please.” said Martha. Carlos appeared at her side and said “Give her time to think this all through, she’ll come to you when she’s ready to listen.” then he went after her quickly. Urs put his arm round Martha and said “It will all work out babe, like Carlos said you just need to give her time.” then he gave her a kiss on the cheek and said “Lets get out of here.”

5 days had passed since they had got the results and Martha was at home alone one day, Matt being at work and Urs and Carlos having gone back to London to start working again. She was about to take a shower when the doorbell rang, she picked up her robe and putting it on went to answer the door. She got a shock when she opened it to find Claudia and Emma standing there. She put a hand over her mouth then said “Omg, what are you girls doing here?” Emma smiled and said “We’ve been worried about you and what with you getting the results of the test and not having spoken to you for a while, we decided to come and surprise you.” Martha grinned and said “This is wonderful, just what I really need just now. Come in.” They walked in and both gave her a hug before they sat down. “So tell us, how are you really doing? Have you spoken to JJ at all since you found out?” asked Claudia. Martha shook her head and said “No, I haven’t seen her or spoken to her since we were at the doctors. I know she hasn’t gone home though, she’s still with Carlos in London. She won’t be allowed back onto her course until the new college year starts in September because of the way she just walked away from it without telling anyone. So she is staying with him at his place.” “And you, how are you doing?” asked Claudia again.

Martha sighed and said “I’m okay, I take every day as it comes, Urs has been wonderful, he stayed here with me right up until the other day when he had to go back to work. I couldn’t have done it without him there by my side the whole time.” She looked at them both and said “I miss him so much.” Emma smiled and said “Well, we’ve had an idea, and you’re not allowed to say no!!” Martha laughed and said “Okay, so what is this idea?” Claudia looked at Emma and said “We thought that as we were coming to see you, we could come here, get you to pack a few things and then come to London with us. We miss David and Seb almost as much as you miss Urs. I know we speak all the time on the phone, but its not the same as seeing them in front of us.” Emma nodded and said “We could all stay in the same hotel and surprise them, it would be like old times.” Martha didn’t look sure and Claudia said “You don’t have to see JJ if you’re not ready to. You said yourself, she’s staying with Carlos. They won’t be in the hotel with us.” “She’s right and we’ll have fun Martha, come on, you’ll get to see Urs again.” Martha grinned and they knew they had her. “Okay, I was going to have a shower before you two arrived, let me have that and pack a bag and we can go.” She walked towards the door and then said “I’d better leave a note for Matt too, in case he wonders where I’ve gone.”

The guys were in Simon’s office waiting for him to arrive, they had a meeting about what songs they were going to put on the new album. Although it wasn’t being released until the next year, they wanted to take the time and pick the perfect songs to make it one of their best albums yet. Urs looked at Carlos and said “How’s JJ doing?” He smiled and said “Not too badly I think, she has done a lot of thinking and we talk a lot at night when I’m at home.” “I’m glad to hear that, is she ready to talk to Martha at all yet? Carlos shrugged “I don’t know, she does talk a lot about what things were like before all this happened, I think she misses the other girls and I think she really misses Martha, she just doesn’t know how to admit it I think.” Urs sighed “Things like this just take time. I just wish Martha wasn’t so far away. I don’t like leaving her when things are still like this. I’m just glad she’s got Matt with her as that means she’s not totally alone.” Carlos nodded in agreement. Seb and David were at the other side of the room talking about their girls too. “When was the last time you saw Claudia? David sighed and said “Far too long ago, why?” He grinned and said “Well, I have an idea on how to surprise her and Emma and get to spend some time with them.” David smiled and said “I’m listening.” then muttered under his breath when Simon arrived and they had to start the meeting. A few hours later and they were finished and Carlos had already left to go back to JJ and Urs was talking to Simon about something. Seb and David walked out of the building and David said “Right, tell me what this plan is.” Seb grinned and told David what he had planned as they walked off down the street.

*Chapter 36*

The next morning saw the girls waking up in their hotel rooms, having arrived late evening the day before. They met up for breakfast then Claudia sent David a text to say she missed him and what were his plans for the day. She got one back saying that he missed her too and that they were going to be in the studio for the morning then they were doing a magazine interview in the afternoon. She smiled and said "Okay, they're going to be in the studio recording this morning so we just turn up and surprise them." Emma grinned and said "This is going to be great, come on, lets go and get ready." They all laughed and then made their way bak to their rooms to get showered and changed. An hour later they were all back down in the lobby and ready to go. They were walking out of the door when Martha slowed down. Claudia and Emma looked at her and Emma said "What is it hun?" She frowned and said "If they're in the studio JJ might be there with Carlos." Emma shook her head and said "I doubt it, she's probably keeping away from the other guys just now, she's got a lot to deal with and i think she'll just be keeping away from everyone but Carlos just now." Claudia nodded and said "I agree, she'll not be wanting to be around people who could ask loads of things she's not ready to answer, she won't be there." Martha smiled and said "I guess you're right, lets go then." They laughed and caught a taxi to take them to the studio. Once there they paid the cab and then made their way inside getting excited about seeing the guys again. They stopped at the reception desk and said "We're here to see IL Divo, they're not expecting us, we wanted to surprise them." The women behind the desk looked confused and said "IL Divo? They're not booked in for today." Claudia frowned and said "Are you sure? I spoke to David about an hour ago and he told me they were going to be in the studio this morning." The women checked the book and shook her head "No, they're definatly not here today. We have them booked in for a couple of days next month, but nothing before then."

The girls looked at each other and said "Thank you." to the lady and walked back out of the studio and then Claudia took out her phone and was about to phone him when Martha said "Don't." Claudia looked at her and said "What?" "Don't phone David, He's lied to you and got caught out, who knows what they're doing, lets just go back to the hotel, this was a mistake." said Martha then walked away. Claudia looked at Emma and said "What do you think?" She shook her head and said "I don't know, i'm going to phone Seb and see if he says anything about where they are." Claudia nodded and then ran after Martha leaving Emma alone.
David, Seb and Urs were in the car heading for Scotland to surprise the girls as Seb knew that Emma was going to see Claudia and they were going to stop off and pick up Martha on the way. David got a text and smiled when he saw it was Claudia asking him what they were doing that day and he replied telling her they were in the studio and then doing a photoshoot for a magazine. Once he'd sent it he smiled at Seb and said "This is going to be great, i can't wait to see the looks on their faces when we all turn up on her doorstep." The morning passed quickly and they soon reached Martha's place. Urs got out and went to go get her but there was no answer so he took his phone out and sent her a text asking her where she was. He got a reply quickly saying "I've gone out for the day to think things through, i'll phone you later. Love you xx" he frowned and went back to the car and said "She's not here, she's gone out for the day." David said "Thats okay, we just change the plans slightly, we go and get the other two and come back here instead of taking her to them." Urs nodded but didn't like the sound of what she'd said. Just then Seb's phone rang and he smiled when he saw Emma's name on the screen. He answered it and said "Hi babe, how are you?" he listened then said "Has she not arrived yet then?" then he laughed and said "Nothing interesting, we're in the studio doing some tracks for the new album, we're just having a small break." he frowned and said "No, the one in London, you know the one we always use." he was quiet for a minute then said "Okay babe, i'll talk to you again soon. love you." and hung up.

He turned and saw Urs looking at him and said "That was weird, she wanted to know where we were today, Claudia hasn't arrived yet she says and then when i said we were in the studio she asked if we were in a different one to the one we always use." Urs shook his head "Its probably nothing, you're just imagining things, you know how you get things confused." Seb sighed and said "Maybe you're right, lets go David." They set off again this time heading for Emma's, it took them a couple of hours to reach there and the three of them got out of the car and Seb rang the doorbell. He smiled when he heard someone moving inside and then the door opened and someone he didn't know stood there. "He looked at the others and said "We were looking for Emma, i'm sorry, we must have the wrong place." The girl smiled and said "No, you're right. I'm Sophie, Emma's flatmate." Seb smiled again and said "Oh right, sorry. Is she here?" She shook her head and said "Sorry, she left this morning with another girl, can't remember her name, i'm terrible with names, but she came to pick her up." "Was it Claudia?" asked David then said "The name of the girl who she left with." as he noticed the confused look on her face. She thought for a minute and said "Yes, that sounds familiar." Urs sighed and said "Do you know when they will be back?" She shook her head slowly and said "I doubt it will be today, they went to go get another girl and were then heading off into London to surprise some guys they met last year." David groaned and said "You mean we came all this way to see them and they're in London." He shook his head and walked back to the car followed by Seb. Urs sighed again and said "I'm sorry we interrupted you Sophie, thanks for your help." and then he smiled and went back to the car where David was leaning against it.

He looked at Urs and said "Do you want to drive back? I'll phone Claudia and tell them where we are and get them to stay in London." He sighed and said "So much for surprising them." then got into the car. They had just driven off when Seb said "That must have been why Emma was wondering if we were using a different studio, they must have gone to surprise us there and found out we weren't there." He thought for a minute and then said "That means that they know that we lied to them." David sighed and said "I knew this was going to go wrong, things like this never work out right." He took his phone out of his pocket and dialled Claudia's number and waited for her to answer. "Hey babe, listen, before you ask me where we are again, we're on our way back from Emma's place. We came up with a plan to surprise you all as we hadn't seen you in ages and we had a few days off, so when you phoned this morning to ask where we were, we lied and told you we were working. We didn't know you were heading for London, but like i said, we are on our way back and we'll be with you as soon as we can. Where are you staying?" He grinned then and spoke for a couple more minutes and then hung up. Urs looked at the grin on his face and said "Whats up?" He shook his head and said "Nothing, i asked her where they were staying and she said "In our usual hotel." Urs grinned and David laughed "What memories that hotel has." then they all laughed.

They finally arrived back in London that evening and went straight to the hotel to meet the girls. Seb had texted Emma to let her know they had arrived in London and they said they would be waiting for them in the bar. They walked into the hotel and made their way to the bar where they saw the girls sitting at a table, Emma looked up and saw them coming and grinned at Seb as he sat down and said "I bet you're tired now." He shook his head and said "Non, i slept in the car." then laughed. He gave her a hug and a kiss and said "I can't believe you're actually in front of me after all the running around we've done to try and see you." Urs looked at him and said "What do you mean we? David drove there and I drove back, you just sat in the back sleeping." He nodded and said "Thats true, but only because you two wouldn't let me drive." David grinned "Thats because we wanted to get there in one piece, with your driving we might not have." Everyone laughed while Seb pouted and Emma kissed him and said "I haven't seen your driving but i'm sure its not as bad as they're saying it is." Urs snorted and David tried unsuccesfully not to laugh. Urs turned to Martha and saw she was smiling and said "Its good to see you smiling again. How are you doing?" She smiled at him and said "I'm okay, i was a bit down this morning when i woke up to an empty house and faced a day alone but then these two showed up and persuaded me to come here with them and see you lot." "She didn't need much persuading though." said Claudia. "We just mentioned your name and she went all red and said she'd love to come." Urs laughed as Martha went red and hit Claudia. They spent the rest of the night just talking and laughing before they all disappeared in various directions.

*Chapter 37*

Seb and Emma had disappeared long before the others had, they had both gone to the toilet and just never came back. Seb had been waiting outside the ladies for Emma to come out and then he had caught her and pulled him in close kissing her softly before saying. "You don't know how much i've missed you. After everything that happened we didn't get to spend that much time alone and then we all had to go back to work and only had phones and email." He kissed her again and she smiled and said "I know, but things are looking better now and we're alone now." she looked around her at the few people in the bar and said "Well, almost, but i know a place we can really be alone." and she took his arm as he raised his eyebrows at her. She giggled as they made their way to the elevator and shye pressed the button for her floor and once there got out and ran ahead of him to open her door. He watched her disappear and walked slowly towards the door she had walked through. She had left it open and he walked in, shutting it behind him and went into the room. He grinned as he saw her standing by the window and looking about said "I see you're in the same rooms you were in when we met you first." She turned and nodded saying "We always book these now instead of the regular rooms. There's so much more room to move about in." Seb grinned and said "Now what would you girls be needing lots of room to move about in for?" he walked slowly towards her as he said this.

Emma walked slowly backwards away from him and said "Well, you never know who we're going to meet and bring back with us." Seb raised his eyebrows again and said "Really? Do you bring a lot of people back to your room?" He grinned as Emma hit the side of the sofa and couldn't move any further back. She shook her head slowly as he got closer and said "Nah, there's not usually any good looking men around, we usually just make do with anyone we can find." He was right in front of her now, so close that she could feel his breath on her skin and he said "Is that so? She nodded and he ran his tongue slowly over his lips watching her all the time. He leaned closer to her and kissed her softly at first then deepening it as he took her in his arms and she sank slowly onto the arm of the sofa. He pulled back for a minute and she shifted slighty to make herself more comfy and Seb grinned as he kissed her again this time kissing her lips then her cheek, down her neck and onto her chest. She put her arms round his neck and leaned back enjoying the feel of his lips on her skin when she lost her balance and fell backwards onto the sofa pulling Seb with her. They burst out laughing as they lay there, Emma on the sofa with Seb lying half on top of her and half on the floor. She let her arms go from around his neck and he slid completely onto the floor. She turned onto her side and looked at him sitting there and said "Maybe this is telling us we need to forget the playing and just go straight to the bedroom." then she winked at him. He grinned and got himself up off the floor, picked her up and carried her into the bedroom shutting the door behind them.

The other four were still down in the bar but were just about to leave as well, Claudia stood up yawning and said "I'm tired, think i need a long bath and then my bed." David leaned over and whispered something in her ear then laughed at the look on her face. Urs looked at her and said "What did he just say?" then changed his mind and said "Never mind, i'm not sure i want to know." David and Claudia both laughed and they stood up excusing themselves and headed off to her room. Once inside he disappeared into the bathroom and she could hear water running as she sat down on the bed and took her shoes off. He appeared by her side and started to rub her shoulders gently. She sighed and said "That feels so good." He kissed her shoulders softly and said "After your bath there will be a lot more of that to come, now, your bath is ready, go and get into it and i'll be there in a minute to wash your back for you." He winked at her as she stood up and walked towards the bathroom and shut the door behind her.

David smiled to himself and started to take a few things out of the bag he had with him and laying them out then he went to join Claudia. She had just got in and was almost covered by all the bubbles he'd put in it and she looked up as he walked in and stared slightly as she noticed he'd removed his shirt and was just wearing his jeans. He sat down on the edge of the bath and she said "Did you want this many bubbles?" He grinned and nodded before saying "Yes, I love a lot of bubbles in a bath." She smiled and said "But you're not in it." He laughed and said "No, but i could be if you wanted." he leaned over and kissed her then let out a shout as she reached up and pulled him into the bath sending water flowing everywhere. She laughed at the look on his face and said "But you said you could be in here if i wanted." He shook his head and wiped the water from his eyes and said "I was thinking of taking my clothes of first though." She grinned as he lay down against her and she put her arms round his waist and held him whilst she kissed his neck and his shoulders. They stayed in there til the water went cold then they got out and went through into the bedroom where he showed Claudia just how good a masseuse he was.

They had left Urs and Martha down in the bar, Urs wasn't sure if she would want him to stay and he wasn't really wanting to go and leave her. After they had been left alone they had started talking about JJ and whether she had spoken to her yet. He wasn't sure if he should tell her that she was still in London with Carlos but then thought she probably already knew that if the girls had had to convince her to come to London. He wanted to talk to her about it, maybe suggest that she went to see her while she was in London but didn't want to upset her so left it unsaid which is why it came as a shock to him when she suddenly asked him how Carlos was and if he ever saw JJ. He looked at her and said "He's okay, like us he's glad to have a few days break, but he spends all his spare time just now with her and no, i think i've only seen her once since she came back from yours to stay with him. I don't think she feels comfortable around the rest of us because we all know whats happened and she thinks we've all taken your side over her." He looked at the look of sadness that came over Martha as he said that and wished he could take it back.

"I'm sorry babe, i know you miss her and i'm sure she misses you too. This adoption stuff brought up a lot of memories for her and not all of them were good. Even though you're not her mum she still has to figure out how she feels about you giving up a baby. She knows how it feels to be given away at birth, thats why she's acting the way she is." Martha sighed and said "I know this, and i know that i need to talk to her and explain to her exactly why i gave my baby up. I didn't do it lightly, there was no other way and i would do anything now to have her back where she should be." Urs pulled her into a hug and said quietly "So why don't you go and see her tmrw, while you're in London? I'll come with you and Carlos will be there. I'll phone him in the morning and tell him we're coming so they don't go out." He felt her shaking against him and said "Now is as good a time as any and then maybe we can start getting you and JJ back to being the friends you used to be." She lifted her head and looked at him and said slowly "You're right. I've been putting it off, but i don't have a reason to put it off anymore. It won't be easy though, she probably won't want to listen to me." He kissed her cheek and said "Then we'll just stay there until she does." She nodded and said "Thanks Urs" she paused and then looked at him and said "Do you want to come up with me tonight?" He smiled and said "I hoped you would ask me that, i'd love to come up with you and then we can get through tomorrow together." They stood up then and made their way up to Martha's room where they got into bed and just lay in each others arms until they fell asleep.

*Chapter 38*

The next morning they were up early and already eating breakfast when the others appeared. They got something and sat down, Martha looked at Ema and said "You dissappeared awfully quickly last night." Emma blushed and said "I'm sorry i didn't say goodnight but Seb caught me outside the toilets and we just went up to my room from there." Martha smiled and said "I was only joking." "So, what are our plans for today?" asked Claudia. Martha looked at Urs then said "We're going to Carlos' so that i can talk to JJ properly and try to explain why i gave my baby away." Emma and Claudia both looked at her and said "Do you want us to come with you?" She shook her head and said "No thanks girls, you go and have fun today, i need to do this myself i think." Emma nodded and said "Okay, if you're sure?" Martha nodded and said "We'll meet you tonight for dinner though." then her and Urs stood up and headed off out of the hotel and to see Carlos and JJ.

As they stood outside his door Martha took a deep breath and Urs looked at her and said "Are you okay?" She nodded and said "Yeah, and hopefully this will make things better between JJ and me, i miss her so much you know." he nodded and gave her a quick hug then pressed the doorbell. They heard footsteps and then the door opened to reveal Carlos, he smiled and hugged Martha then greeted Urs as he let them in and led them through to the kitchen. He had told JJ they were coming and that she was going to stay and listen to her this time so that she had time to get herself ready. They found her standing by the sink drying the breakfast dishes and Carlos went over and took her arm and made her sit down. She looked at Martha and Urs as she sat down and then said "Carlos has made me promise i will stay and listen to you this time, so i will just listen and stay quiet until you have finished and then i would like you to do the same while i am talking, okay?" Martha nodded and said "Thats fine." then sighed and said "I have no idea where to start, so i shall go right back to the beginning, from when i was small." She took a deep breath and then said "I was three when my dad walked out on me and mum and mum struggled so hard over the next couple of years to support the both of us, she would go out working at all hours of the day and night, often leaving me by myself to do so, she would never seem to eat much, always giving me most of her dinner as well as my own. I never knew what was happening, i never had the chance to go out and play with the local kids, i was always worried about her. I was five years old and i spent all of my time worrying about my mum. Eventually it got too much for her and she suddenly stopped going to work so much, she would stay at home and she would always act as if things were okay and that she would get a job soon but that was the year i started school and she would drop me off in the morning and have a taxi pick me up at night." She stopped and fiddled with a piece of her hair for a minute then said "I would let myself into the house and find her in different rooms each day, but always in the same state. I don't know where she hid the drink, i could never find it when i looked, but as i said I was only five and she was my mum, so i would go and get a bowl with water in it and clean her up and then put a blanket over her so she wouldn't get cold. I would wait for hours sometimes waiting for her to wake up, would often just have a bowl of cereal or some toast for my dinner as that was all i knew how to do. Once she woke up she would come find me and would say she was sorry and she wouldn't do it again, but every day i would come home and she'd be out cold somewhere." She stopped as she felt Urs put his arm round her and she smiled weakly at him and carried on. "This went on for almost a year, it was just a couple of days before my sixth birthday and i let myself into the house as usual and went to find her, but i looked in every room and she wasn't in any of them. I didn't know what to do, i think i sat down and just cried for a whole hour without stopping, i was used to being alone, but i had always known where she was or knew that she was in the house, just sleeping. I finally got myself up and i went up to my bedroom to go to bed and thats when i found the letter, the one she had written to say that she loved me so much, but she just couldn't look after me anymore and she had left so that i could have a proper childhood with a proper family who would take care of me the way i was meant to be taken care of, i went to bed that night for the first time in my life feeling totally alone."

She stopped and took a sip of the water Carlos had sat in front of her and then said "I walked myself to school the next day and showed the letter to my teacher and that was the last i saw of the house i had lived in for my whole life. I was taken into care and went from foster home to foster home for four years then i went to live with the people who i call family now." She looked up at them all and said "Matt isn't my brother, well, not a blood related one that is, we got on from the moment i moved in with them, he always looked out for me, let me hang out with him and his friends and i had a mum and a dad again and they both looked after me instead of me looking after them. I went through school well, doing good in my exams and was planning on what college i wanted to go to, i wanted to be a teacher, then i found out i was pregnant." She looked at Urs who smiled at her and said "Its okay babe, carry on." She looked at JJ who was leaning against Carlos and was looking rather pale. "I had only slept with one guy, his name was Richard Davies, he was in the year above me at school and when he asked me if i would go out with him i didn't know what to say, he was the best looking guy in the school, the one all the girls wanted and he was asking me out. I finally said yes and we went out for a month. Mum and dad didn't like him, they said he was only after one thing and i realised afterwards that they were right. But before that i wouldn't listen to them and one weekend we were at his place alone and we just did it, he was really gentle and caring at the time but when i got to school on the monday he dumped me, right in front of all his friends and half the school. I was devastated and ran away from school and hid from everyone. When Matt found out he went crazy and said he would take care of him but i begged him not to do anything, i just wanted to forget about him and get on with my life." She took another drink and then said "When i found out i was pregnant, i knew i couldn't tell mum and dad, Matt had just told them he was gay and they were still trying to deal with that, i couldn't tell them that i was pregnant as well. I did tell Matt though and he said he would stand by me if i wanted to keep it, but he was only two years older than me and i knew deep down that i couldn't look after a baby and i didn't want to keep it and not be able to cope and have it go through what i went through so when i finally told my parents they went mad, told me that i couldn't have it and if i did have it they didn't want me in the house anymore. I sat there with tears running down my face and just let them shout and get everything they wanted to say out then i told them i didn't want to keep it but i didn't want to have an abortion. After they calmed down and realised that i meant it they made all the arrangements for the adoption and i just carried on with my life taking each day as it came. The hardest part was after i'd gone into labour and had the baby, the nurse offered me the chance to see her, even though she wasn't meant to and i said no, because i knew that if i looked at her i wouldn't be able to give her up and i wanted her to have a proper family from day one. When i got home i spent the next few months just crying and trying to cope with what i'd done and many times i wished i'd had the courage to keep her then remembering why i'd done it. Matt was there for me the whole time, i was so lucky that i ended up with them and i knew that wherever my baby was that she would be just as lucky." She looked up and said "That is why i gave my baby away and everytime i regretted my decision, which was almost daily, i thought about how i'd felt growing up in a house with no dad and a mum who was either never there or lying sleeping somewhere because she'd drunk so much she'd passed out. I didn't just give away my baby because i didn't want her, i wanted her but knew i was only 15 and couldn't give her the life she deserved." the tears had started rolling down her face and Urs pulled her into him and held her close to him.

*Chapter 39*

JJ waited until Martha had stopped crying and then said "Why did you never tell any of us that? We would have understood and i wouldn't have been so horrible to you over all this." she looked at Martha who was still leaning on Urs and said "I was so horrible to you and i don't even think my anger was aimed at you, it was because you had done what my real parents had done and they weren't there for me to shout at so i took it out on you." Martha shook her head and said "We never talked about our pasts, we became friends through a love of four guys and that was all we needed to know and talk about. Besides, when i first found the forum and you girls i wasn't in the right place to be going over my childhood. I'd just lost my fiancee and was looking for a life outside of the real one that i could disappear into every now and then. But i met you three and it just felt right, like we'd known each other for ever. Then after that first weekend in London when we met the guys in the club and got to know them things changed. Sleeping with Urs made me remember Sean all over again, he had been the first person i'd let that close since he'd died and it felt like i had betrayed him in some way and i left without saying goodbye to any of you. But you came after me, thats how strong we were as friends, you all gave up your free time with the other guys to come make sure i was okay." JJ smiled and said "We were all so worried about you, you were the oldest of us, the most sensible, for you to do something like that just wasn't right, we knew there was something you weren't telling us and we were determined to find out what it was. We told the guys we all had to go home, even got into seperate taxi's so they wouldn't suspect anything, but we all went to the same place and got a train to go find you." Martha smiled and said "Thats when you all met Matt for the first time, he said afterwards that you all thought i was his girlfriend." JJ nodded and said "We didn't expect a guy to open the door, so we just assumed. But he knew who we were, even got our names right, thats what made us wonder."

Martha looked at Urs and then said "I've missed you JJ, i've missed you always being there for me, for us and i've missed the four of us always talking and having a laugh together. The other girls feel it too, i know they did their best to not talk about it when we were together cos they knew how upset i got but it was hard for them not to." JJ nodded and said "I miss them too, did they not want to come today?" "Yeah, they did, but i said it was something i needed to do by myself and that Urs would be with me. I told them to go have a fun day with Seb and David and i would meet them for dinner tonight." she said then she looked at JJ and Carlos and said "They would love it if you came with us tonight." she paused then said "I would love it if you came. What do you think, will you come?" JJ looked round at Carlos who had moved away from her to do something and he smiled and nodded. She turned back to Martha and said "I would like us to be friends again, but how can you ever forgive what i did? I was really mean to you." Martha stood up and went over to her and said "In my eyes, there is nothing to forgive, you were hurt and upset, you had a lot of things that caused you pain brought up again and thats why you did and said everything. I understand why you did it all because it brought up my past again and i felt all the pain i had felt too. So you don't need to be forgiven." JJ had tears running down her face and Martha put her arms out to her and JJ let herself fall into them and Martha held her close while Urs and Carlos smiled at each other and walked out of the room leaving them alone knowing they would be okay now.

Emma, Claudia, Seb and David had decided to do the tourist thing, even though the guys lived in London most of the year and the girls came up every few months to stay in it they had never really done any of the things that tourists do. So they had spent the day visiting all the places like Buckingham Palace, Downing Street, The Houses of Parliament and Big Ben, Tower Bridge, took a ride on the London Eye and went to the waxworks museum Madame Tussuads where Seb said he thought they should be in there. The girls laughed as they found a waxwork of Simon Cowell and Seb and David sung for him and got told it was 'absolutly hideous' and 'whoever told you you could sing was an idiot' David grinned and said he was going to tell Simon the next time they saw him that he was an idiot causing Seb to almost choke on the water he'd just taken a drink of. They left the museum laughing and the girls pleaded with them not to go down into the Chamber of Horrors, but the guys dragged them down and kept them close throughout, to keep them from being scared, they said but the girls could see the looks on their faces even though it was dark and knew they weren't enjoying it as much as they said they were. It was geting late then so they decided to head back to get ready for dinner.

They split up though with David and Claudia heading back to his place so he could get changed, having no clothes other than what he was wearing at the hotel and Seb and Emma doing the same. David let them both into his place and he told Claudia to make herself at home while he got showered and changed, she looked round the living room at all the photo's of him and whom she assumed were his family, of his books, his music collection and then his playstation games. He smiled to himself as he stood at the door watching her and he said "Why don't you put some music on, i'll not be too much longer." She jumped at hearing his voice and turned and stared as he was standing there still wet with a towel wrapped round his waist. He grinned at her and walked into the room and picked up a shirt that was hanging over a chair and said "I can't really go out without this." then winked and walked back to his room. She smiled and turned to pick out a cd and put it on then sat down to wait for him to be ready.

Seb and Emma however had decided that it would save time if Seb just picked up some clothes and used the shower in her room at the hotel, so they only stayed a few minutes at his place before leaving again. She had already showered and was now sitting drying her hair and putting her make up on while he was in the shower. She smiled as she could hear him singing in French and made a note to ask him for lessons so she could understand him and talk to him in his own language. She had just finished her make up and was starting to get dressed when he appeared out of the bathroom wearing only a towel. She tried not to stare at him and get on with getting herself ready but he wasn't making it easy by standing right beside her and smelling so good. She put her dress on and turning her back on him said "Can you pull my zip up for me please?" He looked at her bare back and said "Sûr, à moins que vous me préfériez pour l'enlever et pour vous porter directement au lit à la place?" Emma turned to look at him and he smiled then turned her round and pulled her zip up and kissed her neck softly. He went back to getting himself dressed as Emma turns to face him and said "What did you just say?" He finished buttoning his shirt and put his tie on before saying "Aah, it would be no fun if i told you what i just said." then he grinned and grabbing his jacket said "Are you ready to go?" She shook her head at him and grabbed her bag and walked out the door after him shutting it behind her.

They met David and Claudia already downstairs and ordered a drink while waiting for Urs and Martha to appear. They were talking about how scared the guys had been in the Chamber of Horrors and the guys were protesting when they heard "I've missed you two fighting all the time." Claudia and Emma both looked up recognising the voice and Emma said "JJ, omg, its good to see you girl, how are you doing?" Claudia looked at her and Carlos and said "How did things go with Martha today? Does she know you're here?" JJ nodded and then said something to Carlos who nodded and disappeared. "We had a long talk today, she told me why she did what she did and i realised i wasn't mad at her, i was mad at my own mum for giving me up. But we talked almost all day and got a lot of things sorted out, Carlos and Urs left us to it once they realised we were going to be okay and wouldn't kill each other." She smiled at the looks on their faces and said "Martha asked me if i would like to join you all tonight, she said she had missed us all being together and she said you two had missed it as well." Emma nodded and said "Its not been the same without all four of us but are you back, i mean are the two of you okay with each other?" "Yes, we spent the whole day going over everything and i told her there was nothing to forgive." said Martha who had just appeared with Urs. "We also made each other a promise, that we would help each other out. I'm going to look for my daughter and she's going to look for her mum." She looked at JJ who smiled and put her hand in hers and squeezed it tightly then said "We're going to do it together."

Once they were both ready they headed down for some breakfast and found Seb and Emma just leaving and Urs and Martha sitting at a table, they got some food and went to join them, Martha wincing at the noise they were making. Urs grinned and said "She has a hangover and isn't feeling too well, are you babe?" Martha looked up and said "I just want to go back to bed, please Urs." He looked at her pale face and nodded saying "Okay, lets go." They stood up as David said "Thats not fair, they get to spend the day in bed, why can't we?" Claudia grinned as Urs looked at her strangely and said "David wanted to spend the day in bed but i'm making him spend the day outside." He grinned and said "Good luck with that, don't let him fool you into coming back early." She nodded and said "I won't" then she looked at Martha and said "I hope you feel better soon hun." Martha just nodded and took Urs' arm who said goodbye to them and left them alone to have their breakfast. David disappeared for a few minutes and when he came back wouldn't tell Claudia what he was up to. They finished their breakfast then went back upstairs to get their stuff ready for the day and as they went back down David stopped at reception and said something to the lady behind the desk who nodded and picked up the phone then said "It will be 10 minutes." he nodded and thanked her then told Claudia they had to wait 10 minutes before they could leave but wouldn't say why. They sat down and started talking and then they got interrupted by the lady who handed David a large hamper. Claudia looked at it and then at him and he said "I thought we could spend the morning in Hyde Park, find a nice spot, lie out in the sun and have a picnic lunch, then in the afternoon we could do some shopping if you like? i want to spoil you." He smiled at the look on her face and said "Is that a yes?" She grinned and nodded then said "This is a lovely idea, much better than staying in bed all day." then kissed him before he could say anything. He grinned as they got up and made their way out of the hotel in the sunshine.

*Chapter 40*
The day passed too quickly for all the girls who knew this was the last time they would see the guys again for a while. It was a quiet table at breakfast the next morning as they waited for Carlos and JJ to arrive. Martha looked at them and said "Have you finished recording the album yet?" David shook his head and said "No, we have a meeting with Simon this morning to see what he thinks of what we have done so far then its back into the studio for the next couple of weeks." "So you'll still be in London then?" said Emma hopefully. Seb smiled and said "Sorry, we're straight on a flight to Sweden after our meeting, we always record in 3 different studio's." Claudia grinned and said "London, Sweden and Ireland." then laughed at the look on their faces, just then Carlos and JJ walked into the room and stood beside them. "We have to go guys, we don't want to be late for Simon." They all nodded and slowly got up and they walked out of the hotel and over to where Carlos had parked. They all said their goodbyes then they were gone. The girls made their way back into the hotel and up to Martha's room where they all fell into a chair and sighed. JJ sniffed and wiped away the tears that were starting to run down her face, Claudia who was nearest to her put an arm round her and said "Are you okay babe?" She nodded and said "Its the first time we've been apart since he came to find me, i've been staying with him instead of going home." She looked up and said "He asked me to go with him to Sweden, seeing as i don't have anything to do until i can start my course again in September, you girls all have your work or Uni to be here for, but i have nothing." Martha came and sat beside her and said "Why didn't you go? I would have gone with Urs if he'd asked me, even if i do have to get back for work." JJ sniffed again and said "I told him i couldn't, i had to stay here with you girls and with you Martha. I thought since i have all this free time now i could start looking into how we can find your daughter and my mother." She gave her a hug then said "Okay, we are not going to sit around here moping about not having the guys around, we just spent a wonderful couple of days with them and we don't have to go home until tomorrow so lets go have fun today before we go back to our boring normal lives." The others smiled and nodded before going to their own rooms and getting ready to go out.

The next couple of months seemed to fly past for both the girls and the guys, the girls having gone back to work and Uni and the guys finally finishing the album and now focusing on all the private functions Simon had booked them to do. While the girls were busy JJ had thrown herself into finding out how to locate and contact adopted and birth families. This didn't stop them all from missing each other and spending hours on the phone each night though. JJ was staying with Martha for a few days and they were talking about what she had found out. She pulled out a pile of papers and said "This 'Adoption, Search & Reunion' website appears to be the one to go through, it gives you all the links to find the agencys that were used and how to make contact with them." she put some more papers on the table and Martha picked up a few and read a bit and said "It says here that some people who don't want to be contacted say that to the agency. What if we come up against that?" JJ looked through the papers and picked one up saying "Even if they've asked for no contact it doesn't always guarantee that they won't get contacted. There's two different types of no contact, the Absolute Veto which means NO contact at all unless the person who made it changes her mind and tells the agency. Then there is the Qualified Veto which means that they can be contacted for certain reasons that they've specified." Martha sighed and said "It all sounds really complicated." JJ smiled and said "Once you get right into it its not as scary or as complicated as it sounds, once you contact the agency they will assign us a mediator who'll help us make the first contact." Martha nodded and said "So when are we going to do it?" JJ grinned and said "I thought we could leave it until we get back from Rome."

Martha grinned and said "We still have to go shopping for our dresses, but we need to be all together, we need a weekend in London." JJ nodded in agreement and said "We'll need to do it quickly because we leave in a couple of weeks." she smiled again then said "I can't believe the guys actually asked us to go with them and i can't believe that Simon Cowell let them." Martha laughed and said "I'm sure he's not as bad as everyone thinks, we'll maybe find out as i'm sure he will be there too." Just then Martha's phone rang and she answered it and talked for a while then hung up and said "That was Urs, he said to tell you all not to buy dresses before we go as they just bought us dresses today in Rome." JJ stared at her and said "They did what?? They want us to go to to an awards ceremony in dresses that we've never seen. Did he say what they were like?" Martha shook her head and said "He did say that they were going to take pictures of them and send them to my email address." "Well, lets go and see if he's done it yet." she said dragging Martha up and through to where her computer was. They switched it on and then went straight to her inbox where they was an email titled 'your dresses' They looked at each other nervously before clicking to open it and then they saw 4 attatchments, each one named with one of the girls names. They opened Martha's first and they both gasped in shock as they looked at it. "Omg, its beautiful, look at the colour and the detail in it." she said. She clicked onto JJ's file and opened it to reveal her dress and JJ just sat there with her hand over her mouth before saying "Its gorgeous, the colours, the style, its exactly me." They looked at each other then JJ said "I still can't believe we are going to be walking down the red carpet at the Classical Music Awards wearing these dresses." Martha grinned and said "Not only that but its in the Colliseum and we're going to be on the arms of 4 of the most gorgeous men there." JJ smiled and said "Its going to be so good to see the guys again, i can't believe its been nearly 3 months since we saw them. It feels like ages since those few days in London." They looked at Claudia and Emma's dresses as well which were equally as gorgeous as their two before forwarding them onto them with Urs story of how they had bought them in Rome then she sent a quick reply to Urs thanking him and the guys for picking such amazing dresses.

*Chapter 41*

Urs was sitting in the airport waiting for the girls to arrive, only JJ, Claudia and Martha were flying in with Emma following on a couple of days later due to having an exam to sit. He looked up as he heard their flight number announced as landed and he made his way over to the arrivals lounge. He didn't have to wait long as they were amongst the first to appear through the doors and he almost fell over as Martha ran at him and hugged him tight. Claudia smiled as they reached them and said "Let him go, we need him to get us to the hotel." he laughed and said "Its good to see you girls as well." They got their bags then made their way out of the airport and to the waiting car which Urs had taken from the hotel. Once they were all in and on their way JJ said "How are the other guys?" Urs smiled and said "They're fine, wanted to come as well but we decided it would be best if only one of us came, they're waiting for us at the hotel." Martha grinned and said "Well, i'm glad it was you that came." and kissed him on the cheek. They arrived at the hotel not long after that and as the girls were getting their bags Urs sent the guys a text to say they were back and to meet them at his room. They went straight up without checking in as they were going to be sharing with the guys and not having their own rooms. As they walked out of the lift door they saw David, Carlos and Seb standing outside Urs' door. Claudia and JJ both ran up to David and Carlos and gave them a hug. Urs opened the door and they all went inside and sat down. Once they were all comfy and had a drink Seb said "How's Emma? She sounded as if she wasn't really listening to me this morning." JJ put a hand on his arm and said "Don't worry, she's fine, just nervous, this exam is going to count for almost three quarters of her degree, if she doesn't do well she'll not get it even if she gets 100% in the others." They all stared at her and David said "Thats awful, 4 years of her studying could go to waste because of one exam." JJ nodded and said "Thats why we have to keep her mind off it when she gets here." Seb smiled and said "That shouldn't be a problem."

Everyone laughed then Claudia looked at David and said "Now that we're here, can we see these dresses you've bought for us?" David laughed and said I'm sorry babe, but we don't have them here." She looked at him and then at the girls and said "Where do you have them? We'll need to try them on to see if they fit." The other girls nodded in agreement as Urs said "We left them in the shop, they're going to deliver them the morning of the show." "And we know they wil fit you perfectly." added Seb. Carlos smiled at the looks on the girls faces and said "I wouldn't keep trying girls, you'll not win, we've had this all planned since Simon said we could take you." JJ sighed then said "Talking of Simon, is he here yet? Can we meet him?" Urs shook his head "He's not here, he's flying in the same day as Emma, now can we go and get something to eat please?" and he and the other guys stood up. Martha looked at Urs and said "I'm not going anywhere until i've had a shower and changed my clothes." Claudia and JJ nodded and JJ said "We'll meet you all downstairs in an hour." then they all went off to their different rooms to get ready to go out.

*2 days later*

Seb was at the airport, this time waiting for Emma and Simon whom they'd discovered was on the same flight as Emma so he was picking both of them up. He wandered over to the arrivals lounge and sat down to wait, he had almost fallen asleep when he heard a voice saying "I wasn't expecting a welcoming commitee Sebastien." he opened his eyes to see Simon standing in front of him. "Simon, sorry, i must have fallen asleep, how was the flight?" he nodded and said "It was okay thanks, was sat beside this young lady who looked awfully sad, she never spoke once." He looked at Seb and said "Can we go now or are you planning on staying here all day?" Seb smiled and said "Sorry, i'm waiting for Emma as well, she was on the same flight as you." "Emma?" said Simon. "Yes, she's my girlfriend, i'm taking her to the awards with me." He looked at the confusion on Simon's face and he said "You did say it was alright for us to take them when we asked." Simon nodded and said "Yes, i know, i just thought they were already here." Seb shook his head and said "The other girls arrived 2 days ago, Emma couldn't come with them, she had an important exam to sit yesterday." Just then he heard his name and turned to see Emma running towards him. He grinned and gave her a big hug when she reached him. Simon looked at her and said "This is Emma? I've been sitting beside her for the last few hours." Emma suddenly realised that Simon was standing there and blushed then said "Sorry Simon, I wasn't being rude, i just didn't think you would want some stranger trying to make conversation with you and i wasn't really in the mood for talking anyway." Seb looked at her face closely then said "Are you okay cherie? How was the exam?" He saw her face change briefly as he said the word exam then she said "I'm tired Seb and i don't really want to talk about it just now, can we just go to the hotel please?" then she walked away from them both who glanced at each other briefly before quickly following her.

They sat in the car in silence, nobody talking until they reached the hotel where they got out and Seb gave Emma their room key and she headed off to get settled in. Seb looked at Simon and said "You said in the airport the lady sitting beside you looked awfully sad, why did you think that?" Simon looked at his watch then said "Give me five minutes to check in and dump my bags then i'll meet you in the bar and tell you what i think." Seb nodded and headed to the bar and got them both a drink. Simon was back not long after and he sat down and Seb asked again why he had thought Emma was awfully sad. He sighed and said "I don't know, the way she walked onto the plane, she looked like she had the weight of the world on her mind then when she sat down beside me, she never even acknowledged i was there, she switched on some music and pulled out this massive book which she spent the whole flight going through and reading pages here and there and marking places with a pencil then shaking her head and rubbing it out. She looked like she was about to cry at one point. You said she had an exam yesterday?" He nodded "A very important one the girls were saying, it counts for almost three quarters of her degree, if she fails it then she won't get it." He looked worried and said "What if something went wrong, she'll be so upset if she doesn't get her degree." He sighed and said "Hopefully she's found the girls and they'll be able to get her to talk about it." Simon nodded and said "What is she studying?" Seb smiled and said "Forensic Science, she loves it." He looked worried again and Simon said "Don't worry Seb, if she doesn't want to talk to you yet, just be there for her, try and take her mind of it and make sure she has a good time at the awards." He nodded and said "Thanks Simon, i think i'll go find her, if you don't mind?" Simon shook his head and said "Off you go and try not to worry." He watched as Seb walked out of the bar and wondered what the other guys girls were like, no doubt he would find out soon. he got up and went back to his room to try and get some sleep.

*Chapter 42*

Seb walked into the room he was sharing with Emma and found it empty, he sat down on the bed and waited for her to appear again. It didn't take long and he smiled as she walked in and sat down beside him. He put his arms round her and kissed her softly before saying "Are you okay? I know you said you didn't want to talk about it, but you seem awfully down." She pulled herself out of his arms and went to stand by the window looking out of it then sighed as she felt his hands on her shoulders and turned to look at him and said "I'm okay, i always get like this after i've done an exam, i'll be alright tomorrow." She turned her head to smile at him then looked back out of the window. He put his arms around her waist and leaned his head on her shoulder then said "But this wasn't just an exam was it." he paused then said "The girls told us how important this was towards you getting your degree." Emma closed her eyes and took a deep breath then turned so she was facing him and said "It was hard Seb, really hard, i was expecting it to be hard and i thought i had prepared myself well enough for it but there was questions on stuff i hadn't even thought their would be and i just ended up writing anything to fill up the space. It was a mess and i know i've failed, i just have to wait two months to be told that." He wiped away a tear that had fallen and said "Things are never as bad as you think they are. Simon said you spent the whole flight going through your books and writing things down. Did any of it match the answers you gave for the questions you weren't expecting?"

She thought about it for a minute and then said "Actually some of it did." he smiled and said "There you go then, maybe you didn't do as badly as you think." he gave her a kiss then said "Why don't you try and get some sleep and then we can meet the others for dinner and then we have the awards tomorrow." She smiled as he said that and said "Have the others seen their dresses yet?" he shook his head and said "They're still worried that they're not going to fit them and spent the first night they arrived trying to get us to let them see them." Emma laughed and said "When do they arrive?" "The shop is delivering them in the morning so that you can all have plenty of time to get ready." She smiled again and said "I can't wait to see the looks on their faces when they do see them." Seb nodded "Thank you for all your help, it can't have been easy for you keeping it quiet from them and we couldn't have done it without you here helping us." She smiled and said "It wasn't that hard, i just told them i was going home for a couple of days and they never said anything, the hardest part was acting surprised when Martha sent the emails to us all about them because i was talking to Claudia at the time and she suddenly screamed really loudly and almost deafened me, i thought something bad had happened." Seb grinned and said "I'm sure they'll all thank you tomorrow when you can finally tell them why the dresses fit so well! Now, go and get some sleep, you look exhausted." She gave him a kiss then said "I am, don't let me sleep too long though, i'm also hungry." then she went over to the bed and lay down on it while Seb left her alone and went to find the others.

The next day started with the dresses arriving just after breakfast much to the girls delight and they spent the morning trying them on and showing them off to the guys. Emma was feeling better as well, having slept well and thinking about what Seb had said she had decided not to worry too much about it all and just enjoy herself while she was here. Urs looked at Martha's dress and said "You were right when you said that dress would be perfect for her." Martha looked at him confused and said "Who told you that? I thought you picked them yourselves." He looked at Emma who smiled and Claudia said "You helped them, how and when? You were just as surprised as we were when we saw the pictures." She smiled again and said "Remember the few days i went home? Well, i never went home!" she ducked as a pillow was thrown at her then said "You don't know how hard it was not to tell you all, but the guys wanted it to be a surprise." "And we have another surprise for you all." said David. "We've booked you all into the hotel spa for the afternoon so you can relax and then our hair and make up ladies are going to prepare you for tonight." Claudia squealed and gave him a big hug to which he said "I take it you're happy then." They decided to get some lunch before the girls were due at the spa and then they spent the afternoon just lazing about until the girls came back and they started getting ready for the night.
Finally they were all ready and they made their way downstairs where they were all meeting. Martha and Urs were down first and waited for the others to come.

Emma and Seb were next to appear followed closely by JJ and Carlos

and David and Claudia appeared last along with Simon who had met all the girls earlier that day.

They all made their way out to the waiting car and got into it then headed for the Collosieum and the awards ceremony.

*Chapter 43*

It was halfway through the night and they were all seated at a table near to the stage. The guys were up for one award so until they knew if they had won it or not they weren't drinking. There had been some surprise winners already and some that had been expected, the guys weren't expecting to win their category due to who else was in it with them. The place went quiet as Katherine Jenkins stood on stage and said "Good evening ladies and gentlemen, i'm here to give out the award for 'Best Classical Crossover Act' a category that sees all the nominee's bringing operatic music into the mainstream world for people who find it hard to listen to a lot of classical music. The nominee's are: Josh Groban, Teatro, Vittorio Grigolo, IL Divo and Russell Watson." It cuts to little clips of each nominee then she says "And the winner is.................................IL Divo. The guys just look at each other as they weren't expecting it then they stood up and kissing the girls they made their way up to the stage. David took the award and they all said a quick thank you and left the stage again.

4 hours later and the guys and girls were amongst the last few people left at the party, they were now all pretty drunk and still full of the excitement at winning the award which Simon had taken with him when he left earlier to stop them from either breaking it or losing it. David pulled Claudia down onto his knee when she walked in front of him and said "Have you had a good time?" She smiled and nodded then said "Its been such a great night, i can't believe its almost over already." He kissed her and said "The party may be over here but we can carry it on at the hotel, if you want to?" he winked at her and she grinned and said "I'd love to." They both stood up and told the others they were going who all decided to go as well so they all made their way out to the car and headed back to the hotel. They went straight up to Seb and Emma's room where they quickly emptied the contents of the mini-bar.
Seb turned over slowly in the bed and smiled when he saw Emma lying beside him sleeping, he ran a finger down her face and kissed her softly, she smiled and opened her eyes slowly and looked at him then said "Good morning."

He kissed her again and pulled her closer to him and started to kiss his way down her neck and onto her shoulders and was just slipping the strap of her nightdress off her shoulder when he saw someone moving in the corner of the room. He stopped and sat up and looked round and saw the other guys and girls sleeping in various parts of the room. He lay down again and said "We seem to have some strays, we'll have to finish this later." then he kissed her and got up to go have a shower leaving Emma in the bed. She lay there smiling then slipped out of the bed and opened the door to pick up the paper that they always had waiting for them. She made herself a coffee and sat down to read it and almost choked as she turned a page and came across a big photo of the four of them alongside the guys. She scanned the article with it and saw that it was from last night when they walked up the red carpet, she suddenly sensed someone reading over her shoulder and looked up to see Seb behind her and she reached up and kissed him softly before he said "You look good there." She smiled and said "You're just saying that, i hate getting my photo taken and i certainly didn't realise we were going to end up in the papers." Seb smiled and said again "You look good there, so do the other girls, you really were the most gorgeous ladies there." Emma blushed then said "How about i have a quick shower and get dressed then we can leave this lot sleeping and go get something to eat?" He nodded and she went off to have her shower.

20 minutes later and she was ready to go, she looked around her and said "Those lot must have had some amount of drink last night to still be asleep." then she opened the door and they headed down tot he restaurant. They walked in to find Simon just finishing his breakfast and he looked surprised to see them up and about so early. They joined him for a minute and he said that he was just on his way to the airport and he was going to take their award back to London with him. Seb nodded and then he looked at Emma and said "When do you girls go back again? I know we are still in Rome for tonight then we leave for Prague tomorrow morning." She smiled and said "Our flight is tonight at 7.35pm then we're back to our normal routines again. Martha and Claudia are back at work, I'm back at Uni and get my exam results and JJ is still just waiting til she can restart her course again." Simon stood up then and said "Well, i had better get going, it was nice to meet you Emma and i hope you get the result you wanted with your exam." She smiled at him then looked away. Seb caught her and said "What is it babe?" She shook her head and said "Its nothing, just reminded me about the exam, i'd actually managed to forget about it." He pulled her close and kissed her and said "I know that you will have done your best and thats all you could do." He kissed her again and she sighed. They went back up to their room then and found the others all awake and dressed. They quickly decided that they each wanted to spend the day alone, just the two of them so they all disappeared off to their own rooms to make their plans leaving Seb and Emma alone. She looked at him and said "So what would you like to do today?" He grinned at her and said "I think we have some unfinished business from earlier." and he reached out and pulled her closer to him and kissed her softly. Emma grinned and they spent the time they had left together in their room. On the flight home later the girls were all silent, each of them lost in their own memories of the past few days. Once they arrived in London they all said goodbye and headed off in various directions to finish their journey's home.

*Chapter 44*

2 months had passed since the awards and the girls had gone back to their normal lives while the guys had finally finished recording the album and were now doing all the promotion that comes with releasing an album. JJ had started back on her course and was keeping her head down after getting a strict warning that she was on her last chance and if she disappeared again she would not be allowed back again. Emma was still positive that she had failed her exam and still had a few days left to wait to find out when the results came out. Martha and JJ had got in touch with the agency and had been assigned a mediator who had started proceedings into contacting her birth mother and Martha's daughter. A week later the guys were back in London for some television appearances and were eager to see the girls again. David was talking to Seb who was wanting to have a dinner party for Emma who had just told him she had passed her exam when his phone rang. He looked at the screen and didn't recognise the number, so he answered it with 'hello' then frowned when he heard the voice and said "How did you get this number? I told you i never wanted to speak to you again." then hung up and walked off leaving Seb watching him go and wondering what had just happened.

Urs had just landed at the airport, having gone to see Martha and take her back to London with him. He missed her when she wasn't around and wished he could spend more time with her. He smiled as he walked out of the arrivals door and saw her waiting for him, he reached her and gave her a hug and kissed her before they made their way out of the airport and back to her place for the night. Matt was away with friends so they had the house to themselves and Martha was going to make them both dinner so they could have a cosy night in. She went straight to the kitchen to start making it and told Urs to pour them both some wine and to make himself at home. After pouring two glasses he sat down and started telling her about everything that had happened since the last time he'd spoken to her then listened as she did the same. When she was almost ready he went through to the living room and set a few things up then went back and said "We should eat through there, its more comfy than in here." Martha nodded and handed him a plate then picked up her glass of wine and followed him through. She gasped as she saw what he'd done, the small coffee table in the centre of the room had been set with candles lit and soft music was playing quietly. He smiled at her as he put his stuff on the table and said "I told you it would be cosier in here." She put her stuff down and put her arms round his neck and kissed him before saying "Its beautiful, i love it." He smiled and kissed her again before letting her go saying "Lets eat before it gets cold, we can continue this later." then grinned as Martha whispered something in his ear.

He woke up first in the morning and rolled over to look at Martha sleeping beside him. Once again he thought to himself how lucky he was to have her in his life, it had taken a lot of time for him to totally gain her trust but it had been worth it. He smiled as he remembered the night she had said she was ready to go further, it had also been the night he'd told her he loved her. It had been a couple of weeks after her and JJ sorted things out, they'd been out for dinner, he'd had a free night so had flown up to spend it with her, the look on her face when she opened the door to him and a bunch of flowers had been priceless. He had taken her to her favourite restaurant where they'd drunk ****tails and danced all night then they had come home and he'd said he was happy to sleep on the sofa and she had kissed him and said she would rather he slept with her, he'd stared at her and said 'you sure about that?' she'd nodded and said 'I'm sorry i've made you wait this long, you've been so patient with me.' He'd smiled and said he would have waited forever if she hadn't felt right about it, then she had taken him by the hand and led her up to his bedroom closing the door behind them. He looked over at her again and saw her smiling at him. "Hey you, when did you wake up?" he asked. "A few minutes ago, but you looked so deep in thought that i stayed quiet." He leaned over and kissed her then said "I was thinking of our first night together in here." Martha grinned then said "You want to repeat that night now?" Urs sighed and said "I'd love to, but if we start then i'm afraid we'll miss our flight." Martha pouted and Urs grinned and said "We could do it in London tonight though!!" she nodded as she reluctantly got out of bed to get ready. He put a hand on her arm and stopped her then said "I will repeat one thing from that night though." she looked at him strange then smiled as he said "I love you." She kissd him and said "I love you too" then cuddled into his chest for a while before getting ready.

*Chapter 45*

Everyone had landed in London by late afternoon and were having a drink in one of the guys rooms, a pre celebration to Seb's dinner party. David was on the balcony with Seb, Emma and Claudia when his phone rang, he took it out, looked at the number and switched it off without answering it. He knew the number well now, since it had phoned him at least five times since the day before. Claudia looked at him and said "Who was it babe?" "Nobody" he said without even looking at her then went back to speaking to Seb. She looked at him for a minute then walked back into the room and sat down. A few minutes later Seb sat down beside her and said "Hey, are you okay?" She looked at him and said "Yeah, i'm fine." "You don't have to worry about David you know, he can look after himself." She sighed "I know, but he just seems different, we usually talk about everything but he just cut me off back there." Seb put his arm round her and said "I'm sure if he wants to talk, he will. Just act as you normally do and i'm sure he'll be fine." She smiled and said "Yeah, i guess i'm worrying about nothing, thanks Seb." He stood up then and said "I'd better go make sure everythings all ready for tonight." and walked away.The dinner party went really well, everyone having fun and drinking lots. David seemed to have gone back to normal, much to Claudia's relief. Eventually they all parted and went totheir own rooms with plans to spend the next day all together.

2 weeks had passed and the guys were in Simon's office for a meeting about their upcoming tour. They spent a couple of hours discussing it and were just about to leave when Simon asked David to stay behind for a minute. He looked at him then nodded and sat down again. Simon waited until the room was empty and the door shut before looking at David and saying "I'm going to come straight to the point. Who is Kiara?" David went pale and stared at Simon in shock before saying "How do you know about her?" "She phoned me this morning, before you all arrived, said she had been trying to talk to you for weeks now, but you kept cutting her off, so she said she had to try a different way and phoned me instead. Now who is she and how the hell did she get my mobile number?"

Carlos, Seb and Urs were just walking out of the building and were wondering why Simon had wanted to speak to David alone. "Maybe he's noticed that he's not been himself the past few weeks." said Seb. Urs and Carlos both looked at him and Urs said "What do you mean? I haven't noticed him being any different." Seb frowned and said "Surely you've noticed how distracted he's been, how he never seems to answer calls on his phone anymore, why did he change his number? Even Claudia's worried about him, the night of the party for Emma he hurt her feelings and out of all us her and David have had the strongest connection, the easiness of how they got on so well together so quickly and easily, how they could spend whole nights talking about everything and anything then all of a sudden he won't talk to her about something, even being quite rude." he shook his head "There is defiantly something wrong there." He walked away leaving Carlos and Urs to think about what he'd said.

David had sat there in silence for a few minutes then said "She first phoned me about three or four weeks ago, i answered it the first time because i didn't know it was her, after i realised it was her i told her that i never wanted to speak to her again and hung up. After that she phoned me about five or six times a day, i never answered anymore of them. After two weeks i got fed up of it and changed my number. That seemed to work for a week, then she started phoning again." he stopped then said "She must have someone who can get peoples numbers for her. I'm sorry Simon, i never wanted anyone to know about this." Simon was leaning back in his chair listening to him. He sat forward and said "But who is she?" David looked down then said in a quiet voice "She's my wife."

*Chapter 46*

David got up and started walking about the room before coming to a stop at the window and stared out of it. He heard Simon getting up too and appearing at his side then say "Did you just say 'She's my wife'?' David nodded and said "She's actually my ex wife." He sighed and said "Thats a big mess from years ago and it didn't end well." he moved away from the window and sat down again. "I told her that i never wanted to talk to her or see her ever again and i hadn't until that first phonecall." he sighed and ran his hands over his head. Simon watched him for a minute, he'd gone from the funny, bubbly, always smiling David he knew to a pale, quiet, visibly shaken David. He sat down again and said "Do you want to tell me about it? It might help and if i know whats going on i may be able to help get rid of her for good." David took a deep breath then looking at Simon said "I was 19, a few weeks away from my 20th birthday when i met her. She was so sweet, beautiful and charming. She was already 20 and as i got to know her, i found that she was really easy to get on with, we had so much fun for the first six months we were together. The only problem i had was her dad, she was a real daddy's girl, whatever Kiara wanted, Kiara got and i didn't like that. I felt she shouldn't have everything handed to her and he knew i felt like that and he never missed a chance to cause problems for us."

He stopped for a minute then said "After six months together things started to go downhill for me and her. We started arguing all the time, always ending with her running to him then coming back the next day to say she was sorry. Eventually after we'd been out for our first anniversary, we had a massive row and when she came crawling back to me i told her it was over, i'd had enough and i wanted out. She cried and tried to make me change my mind but she eventually accepted it and left. I felt so relieved. I was free of her and her dad and i was ready to move on with my life." He stopped again and Simon said "But you obviously took her back at some point if you married her?" David looked down at the ground before nodding his head and standing up he walked around the office as he said "Three months had passed, i'd not met anyone else, was quite happy being single, but i had put in my application to study at the Oberlin Conservatory in Ohio. Everything was really great. Then i got a phonecall from her, she said she had to tell me something and could i meet her that day, i knew i should have said no, but something in her voice made me wonder if she was okay so i said yes." he paused before he carried on.

"When i got there we talked about nothing for a while then i asked her why she'd wanted to see me and thats when my new life collapsed around me. She said that she was pregnant, just over three months." Simon stared at him in shock and said "And you just believed her?" David shook his head "At first no, i got up and walked off. But she started telling me things, dates that coincided with times we'd, you know, and she said we could do a dna test to prove i was the father, there was a way to do it before he baby was born, but it is dangerous for the baby, so i told her it could wait until after she'd given birth. I couldn't believe i was going to be a dad at the age of 21. We left things there, i had enough to think about and after talking to my mum on the phone for hours about it i knew what i had to do, it was the right thing and the way i had been brought up, so" "You asked her to marry you." finished Simon.

He looked at David who was staring out of the window again, he didn't know what to say to him, when he'd asked him to stay he hadn't expected to hear any of this. "You put a lot of trust and faith into what she said." David nodded "I had to believe she was telling the truth, i mean, she was a spoilt brat, but she usually always told the truth. We were married within the following two months, she wanted to be married before the baby came. After the wedding i went to work in her dads company, all thoughts of going to the conservatory now ruined despite having got a place at it." He looked so sad as he said that. Just then Simon's phone rang and he picked it up and listened for a minute then said "Cancel all my appointments until i say please." and hung up. He looked at David and said "Sorry, so, after the baby was born you did the dna test yes?" David nodded but stayed silent.

"And?" said Simon.

*Chapter 47*

"The baby was mine." Simon closed his eyes and sighed. "We had a little girl, she was so cute, we called her Kaitlyn, she was the only good thing in my life then, me and Kiara couldn't go a day without fighting and i hated working for her dad, he had always hated me and now always seemed so smug to see me having to work for him. The only time i was happy was when it was just me and Kaitlyn alone. We would play, i would read to her, sing to her. She was my angel, the only thing that kept me from going mad." Simon had got up and was standing again. He said "What happened? Why did you leave her or did she leave you?" David shook his head "Kaitlyn had just turned three a few months when i got a visit at the house when i was alone from the doctor who had done the dna test, he said he had something to tell me. When the results had first come back he had told Kiara and her dad first and she didn't like the result so she got her dad to pay him a large sum of money to change them."

Simon had a shocked look on his face and said "You mean Kaitlyn wasn't yours?" David had tears running down his face "He had the papers with him, the ones with the fake results and the one with the real results, the one that said i wasn't the dad. They were identical apart from the result. After he left i packed my stuff and put it in the car then waited for Kiara and Kaitlyn to come back and when they did i said i was taking Kaitlyn to the park. I just wanted to be alone with her to try and tell her that i was leaving. How do you tell a three year old girl that the daddy she loves is leaving and she won't see him again. When we got back to the house i just handed the bit of paper with the real results on it to Kiara, saw her face go pale as she read it, said goodbye and walked out the door. Kaitlyn came running after me shouting daddy and it broke my heart to see her crying as i got into the car and drove away."

He wiped the tears away but they still kept coming. "Have you seen her since then?" asked Simon. David took a deep breath and said "No, when Kiara met me the next day to try and explain i asked her if i could see her once a month or more but she said no, that i didn't have any rights to her, i wasn't her dad. She'll be 13 now." he looked at Simon and said "I told Kiara i never wanted to see or hear from her ever again and walked out. And i didn't until she phoned me." He looked away then said "There hasn't been a day since then though that i haven't thought of Kaitlyn. I know she isn't actually mine, but for over three years i brought her up, i loved her and she loved me." "There is just one thing i don't understand, why did she do it and why did the doctor suddenly decide to tell you?" David looked up and said "Like i told you, Kiara was a totally spoilt daddy's girl who got what she wanted, always. When she couldn't have me, she got herself pregnant and got daddy to pay out the doctor with a massive cheque he couldn't refuse, to change the results so i would stay. But the doctor told me he had just retired and he had wanted to clear his conscience. He had never touched the money and when he retired he gave it all away to various charities."

Simon nodded and said "I can see how he feels, i wouldn't want to have that on my consience either. But do you know what Kiara actually wants? I know you don't want to talk to her and i understand that, but it might be important. It might be something about Kaitlyn. Maybe if you actually speak to her she will say what she has to say then leave you alone again. But i would think it must be something important for her to not give up trying." David sighed and said "I know, i have been thinking that myself but i don't want to risk letting her back into my life again. I'm happy, i have a good job, i have Claudia and i don't ever want to hurt her." Simon nodded then said "I think you should tell her this though." he saw a look pass over Davids face and said "If you don't tell her and she finds out another way she's not going to be happy, she'll think you don't trust her." he paused for a moment then said "She could actually get her number the way she got ours and phone her herself. Especially if you keep ignoring her."

He nodded then standing up said "Thank you Simon, i'm sorry for dragging you into this but it was good to talk about it and see what you thought. We're not seeing the girls again for a few weeks so i'll talk to Claudia tonight." He went to walk out the door when Simon stopped him and said "You can't tell her this over the phone, you need to be in front of her. Take the next couple of days off, the other guys can do the promotion, we'll just say you're not well." David smiled then said "Thanks Simon, i really appreciate it." then he walked out the office leaving Simon thinking over everything he'd just been told.

*Chapter 48*

Urs arrived at the tv studio and found that he was the first to arrive, he sat there and went over the phone call he'd had with David the night before. He'd said that Simon had given him a few days off but not why and the rest of them had to carry on as normal saying that he was sick. He frowned, he hated having to lie and wondered if the others knew what was wrong. He looked up as Seb and Carlos walked in together and was about to speak when Seb said "Do you know whats wrong with David?" Urs sighed and shook his head then said "I was hoping one of you two would. How do we go out there and tell them he's sick when we know he's not?" There was a knock on the door then and the two presenters walked in and smailed then shook their hands. The lady looked round and said "David not here yet?" Carlos shook his head and said "He's not coming, he's in bed sick, could hardly move when i went to see him before we left." "Aww, thats a shame, i hope he feels better soon." she said then they went over what was going to happen on the show.

David looked at the house he'd just pulled up outside of and wondered if this would be the end of his happiness again. He thought of the guys then and knew they were worried about him, he also knew Urs wouldn't be happy telling people he wasn't well, but it was the only excuse they could give that would be believable. He took a deep breath and got out of the car and walking to the door rang the bell and waited. He heard footsteps then it opened and Claudia stood there. She stared at him for a minute then said "David, what are you doing here? I'm just waiting for you to appear on the tv." he smiled then said "The others will be on but Simon gave me some time off, i need to talk to you, to tell you something and it couldn't wait or be done over the phone." She looked at him strangly then said "Come in." He walked in and went through to the lounge while she shut the door and followed him through. He looked at the tv, the others had just appeared on screen and Seb was saying that unfortunatly David was sick and couldn't be there. Claudia looked at him and said "You don't look sick, whats going on David?"

He looked at her and said "This is something i never thought i would have to deal with again, but there's something i never told you about, from my past." Claudia looked worried and sat down before saying "I knew you haven't been right the last few weeks, Seb said you'd be okay, if you wanted to talk you would, so i've been leaving you." he nodded and said "He's right, in a way, but he doesn't know whats wrong, none of them do, only Simon does, thats why i'm here and not there." He looked at the tv and said "They're having to lie for me without knowing why." Claudia put a hand on his arm and said "Don't worry about them, tell me everything, then we can see what we're going to do about it." she smiled at him as he sat down beside her and listened as he told her the same story he'd told Simon. After he'd finished and once again had tears running down his face she pulled him into a hug and just held him tight for a few minutes then released him and said "I am so sorry David, that must have been so hard to get over, i don't think i would be strong enough to get over something like that."

He nodded and said "I just threw myself into work, i reapplied to the Conservatory but had to wait a year before i could get in so i took lots of little part time jobs to get some money. I kept myself to myself, never went out, the only time i had a drink that whole year was when the divorce came through. I knew i wasn't strong and just one more thing had to go wrong and i would totally fall to pieces, if i had started drinking to stop the pain i don't think i'd have stopped and as much as i hated my life then i knew it would get better again after a while and i didn't want to ruin it for the rest of my life." he stopped and looked at Claudia and said "When i started studying it really helped me to focus on something else, and gradually i started to get better, i made a few friends, i started going out now and again. And when i started getting offers to be in operas i actually let myself be happy again."

He looked at Claudia who had been sitting there quietly taking in everything he said and reaching out for her hand said "I'm sorry, this is too much to hear in one go, i never wanted to drag you or anyone else into this. You make me feel totally whole again, you're the only one i've let right into my heart since her and i don't want to hurt you in any way." She gave a small smile and still holding his hand said "Don't worry about hurting me babe, i'm a lot stronger than you realise and i won't let this woman bring you down again. We'll find out together what she wants and whatever it is we'll get through it together. I'm just happy that you told me everything, it must have been driving you crazy keeping it to yourself." she pulled him into a hug and said "You don't have to do this yourself, i'll be with you every step of the way. I love you."

*Chapter 49*

David and Claudia spent the rest of the day talking over everything and trying to figure out a plan which included her taking time off work and going back to London with David so she can be there with him while he tells the other guys the story and when everyone knows everything then he phones Kiara to find out what she wants. They decided to have a break in the evening and go out for dinner and just enjoy the surprise time they had together. When they got back they had a nightcap then went straight to bed. Urs was sitting in his apartment talking to Martha on the phone.

He was telling her how worried he was about David. "I just wish he would talk to us, tell us whats wrong, surely he knows we'll do everything we can to help him." I'm sure he does babe, he probably just needs to figure out for himself first how he feels about whatever it is, then he'll come to you all." he sighed and said "Yeah, i know, what about Claudia, has she said anything to you or the other girls about him?" "Not to me, i don't know about the others, sorry babe." "Its okay, I'd better go, we have another show to be up for tomorrow and its late." they said goodnight to each other then hung up. Urs went and got a beer out of the fridge then sitting down again picked up his guitar and started playing something he was working on.

The next day arrived and Seb, Carlos and Urs were at another tv studio without David promoting the tour unaware that David was actually on his way back to London with Claudia ready to tell them everything that was going on. When they arrived at his place he sent them all a text saying he was back and asking if they could come to his place when they were finished with the work stuff. They had just finished dinner and were cleaning up after it when the doorbell rang, Claudia smiled at David who had his hands in sopay water and went to answer it. As she opened the door she heard Urs say "David, you'd better tell..." then he stopped and said "Claudia." she smiled at them and said "Come in guys, David is in the kitchen." They came in and made their way to the kitchen while Claudia shut the door behind them.

They found David just putting the last of the dishes away and he looked at them and said "I'm sorry for the last couple of days, i needed to talk to Claudia about something and Simon agreed i should do it in person and not over the phone. Thats where i went when he gave me the time off." He walked through into the lounge and sat down with Claudia sitting down beside and putting her hand on his arm to let him know he would be fine. He waited til the guys had all sat down then said "I can't believe i'm saying this again, it will be the third time in three days." Seb looked at him and said "Whats wrong? You've not been right for weeks now, i've noticed it and so did Claudia."

David nodded "She said you had talked to her about it, and you were right in a way, i talked to her when i felt it was time to and thats why i'm talking to you all now, because i am going to need all your help to get me through this in one piece." The three guys looked at each other worriedly and David continued before any of them could speak. He told them the whole story and when he was finished he looked at the looks of shock on their faces and said "Claudia and I decided last night that i'm going to phone her and ask to meet her to find out what she wants, but i'm not going alone, Claudia is going to be with me and i'd like you guys to be there as well. Not beside us, just in the same place keeping an eye on things in case they go wrong."

Carlos nodded slowly and said "We will be there, this woman sounds crazy and you shouldn't be alone with her." Seb nodded and Urs said "I know she is trying to get hold of you for some reason, but is it such a good idea to meet her? You don't know what she's like now, she could be even more crazy than she was then. Maybe you should get Simon to get someone to check it out first, see what she actually wants, get all the details then when you know for sure you can go talk to her on an equal basis. Going in like this gives her all the power, she can tell you as much as she wants or as little. If you find out before hand then she won't be able to pull any surprises on you." David smiled and said "I never thought of it like that, you may be right, i could just be falling right into whatever she has planned for me by going straight in. I'll go see Simon in the morning and see what he says. And i will be back at work tomorrow, if i'm sick for three days the fans will be worried its something serious." They all laughed and then Seb, Carlos and Urs all left while David and Claudia curled up on the sofa together and talked some more about everything.

*Chapter 50*

2 days later and Simon had agreed with Urs, he had spoken to one of his people and said he wanted to know everything he could find out about Kiara and he didn't need to know how he found out. A man stood outside a house, he looked at some papers then put them back in his jacket pocket and walked towards the door and rung the bell. He waited for it to open then said "Good afternoon, I'm Josh Matthews, i believe you're expecting me." The lady nodded and said "Come in." and stood aside to let him through. She took his jacket and said "I'm Kiara Miller." She led him through to the lounge where he sat down and accepted her offer of coffee.

While she went to the kitchen to make it, he had a quick look round the room and saw lots of pictures of a young girl, some pictures of her and the girl and one of her and a man he recognised as David. There was some paperwork lying out on top of a cabinet and he had a quick look at them and saw a hospital logo at the top of them. He quickly noted down the name of the hospital and doctor then sat down again just before Kiara came back in. She sat down and said "I want to thank you for coming, I don't have much time and i am trying to get everything sorted before it runs out." she lifted her cup and he noticed a shake in her hand.

He was about to ask her something when they heard the front door open and shut and the girl from the pictures came into the room. She kissed her mum then smiled at Josh and said "Hey, I'm Kaitlyn." then turned back to her mum and said "I'll be in my room doing homework if you need me, do you need anything first? Did you take your tablets?" Kiara smiled at her and said "I'll be fine thanks hun and i took them earlier." Josh smiled as she left the room and said "She seems lovely." Kiara nodded and said "Yeah, she is now, its just over the last year, before that she never listened to me, just played up the whole time, nothing i did was ever right." she stopped and said "I'm sorry, i shouldn't be telling you all this." Josh shook his head and said "If you want to talk, i'm quite happy to listen, sometimes its easier to tell things to a stranger." Kiara shook her head and said "Thanks, but its okay, as long as we get what i need sorted out i'll be fine." He nodded and said "Okay, tell me what you want done and i can get the ball rolling with it."

He spent an hour in the house with her before he left telling her someone would be back to keep her up to date with how they're going. He was walking back to his car when he saw Kaitlyn sitting on the wall at the side of the house. He walked over to her and sitting beside her he said "Hey, homework all done?" he smiled as she said "No, but i'm just taking a break before i have to go in and help mum." she looked sad as she said this and he said "Does she need a lot of help then?" Kaitlyn looked at him for a minute then said "I spent so many years fighting with her, after my dad left us, i blamed her. I was only three but i still remember feeling like it was her fault somehow and as i got older i never forgave her.

Then last year she started to have blackouts, severe headaches which would keep her in bed for days and she wouldn't go to the doctor so i eventually got one to come out to the house after one of her bad spells. he took her to hospital and did loads of tests and when he told us what was wrong i knew i had to make things right between us so we sat down and talked. She never told me why dad left, but she did say that it had been her fault and she was going to try and put that right. Its just the two of us now and i have to make sure she is okay. " She lifted her head then as she heard her name being called from the house and said "I've gotta go, see you." then ran off inside leaving Josh by himself.

An hour later he was sitting in Simon's office telling him and the others what he had found out. "I have checked with the hospital and that doctor, he was reluctant to tell me anything until i mentioned the affair he was having with one of the nurses and threatened to tell his wife, but it all checks out, the blackouts and headaches Kaitlyn told me about, the shake i saw in her hand and the tablets she's on. She has a tumour in her brain which they've said isn't operable. They gave her a year, at the most." He looked round at the table of people and saw shock in most faces but David said "Can you be 100% sure about this doctor, she had one paid off already, she could do it again." Josh shook his head "Her dad died two years ago, heart attack. She never really got over it, but when he died he split his money between her and Kaitlyn. It was put into a trust for her to get when she reaches twenty one." this time he saw shock on David's face as well.

"These documents are her will and her requests for what she wants done with certain things. I'll leave them with you to pass on to a lawyer for her. I told her someone would be back to keep her informed on how its going." he passed them to Simon who said "I'll get one of the company lawyers on it" then looked at David and said "What do you think David?" He shook his head and said "I don't know, i didn't know what to expect, but that definatly wasn't it." he looked at Josh and said "Kaitlyn still thinks i'm her dad? Kiara never told her i wasn't?" Josh shook his head and said "She knows that her mum did something to make you leave, but she doesn't know what it was." David sighed "What about other men?" Again he shook his head "She never married again, never even had a relationship, it was as if losing you hurt her too much." he paused then said "Kaitlyn did look nervous though, when i was talking to her outside, she kept playing with the necklace she was wearing as if touching it made her feel better somehow." he smiled and said "It was cute, a gold butterfly." "With a diamond in the top two parts of the wings." finished David. Josh nodded and said "How did you know?" David sighed "I gave her it for her third birthday, i can't believe she still has it." he stood up and walked out the office. Claudia quickly got up and followed him.